


Breeze

by 3laxx



Series: Air Series [1]
Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Angst, Attempted Suicide, F/M, Heavy Angst, Marinette will have a big problem, Set around 3 years after canon, So much angst, This fic is really heavy, This'll make you age far beyond your years, Underage Drinking, seriously
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-01
Updated: 2018-01-07
Packaged: 2018-12-09 18:05:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 54
Words: 143,644
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11674323
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/3laxx/pseuds/3laxx
Summary: Marinette sobbed into her hands as she recalled Chloé’s hurtful words, each and every one of them.“You’re nothing! You’re not even worth yourself, much less your so-called friends! Don’t you see they just hang out with you because they pity you?! You’re worth the dirt under my feet, Marinette Dupain-Cheng. And you have no right to speak to me like that, you pathetic little brat. You don’t even have the right to speak to anyone! Just keep your stupid thoughts and ideas to yourself because nobody wants to hear them!”After a big fight with Chloé, Marinette finds herself sobbing on her bed. The words hit her deep down. And before she knows it a dark Akuma comes fluttering in, ready to introduce her to Hawkmoth...





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so...  
> I've been working on this project for a year now and I put a lot of effort into this.  
> It's really an honor for me to be able to finally upload it here on my Ao3 and I have to warn you - it's everything the tags promised.  
> It's going to be dark, it's going to be heavy and most of all, it's going to be a rollercoaster of emotions.  
> With that being said, I hope you know what you're in for... ;)  
> 3laxx

It was late, _again_ , when Marinette finally woke up.

She rolled her eyes at Tikki’s complaints that she was sleeping like a rock and quickly got up to get dressed and to collect her homework.

She smiled at her little Kwami who was glaring at her pointedly, crossing her little arms. But as soon as the bluenette promised her a cookie, her eyes lit up and she giggled again.

Marinette laughed along with her and shook her head as her Kwami hid in her purse. She always got her with cookies.

But now, she had to hurry. School had already started and she didn’t want to be any later than she already was. Quickly she rushed down the stairs and thanked god it was summer so she didn’t have to put on a jacket or something hindering. The girl almost fell at the last steps but was able to catch herself, run through the bakery and kiss her mother’s, as well as her father’s, cheek and run off to school.

 

* * *

 

Alya already waited for her, shaking her head as the bluenette snuck into the classroom.

“Seriously girl, when will you learn to be on time?”, she laughed at her best friend and playfully nudged her shoulder, “Maybe something like this will give you the motivation… Adrien’s always here a few minutes before the lessons start. You could talk to him while Chloé’s not around.”

Marinette’s head snapped around when she had just pulled out her tablet and looked at Alya with a shocked expression.

“Have you even _met_ me once before school?!”

“Since you’ve always slept in, no, I have not.”

She rolled her eyes.

“That’s not the point, Alya. I’m a horrible morning person…”

“Yeah, I can see that.”, her best friend commented dryly.

“I would probably just scare him off.”

Alya laughed quietly, careful not to disturb the lesson and thus send them both to the principal.

“You don’t know that. And now, you wanna copy my notes?”

The bluenette gratefully nodded, taking Alya’s notes to copy them. She also silently made a promise to herself to try and talk to Adrien today. Someday she did have to start, didn’t she?

Suddenly, Alya nudged her a second time to get her attention and she looked over.

“What is it?”, she mouthed.

Alya held up her index finger to motion her to wait and leant down to get something from her bag. When she straightened up again, she took one of Marinette’s hands and began knotting something around her wrist. The bluenette finally got a good look at the bracelet and gasped silently.

“I found a how-to yesterday on Tumblr and I simply had to make you one, since you’re always the one who’s gifting me something.”, her best friend explained.

The bracelet itself was knotted with really tiny knots, practically glowing in the colors pink, violet, blue, white and black. It must’ve taken Alya an eternity and probably the sacrifice of their geometry homework to finish it.

“Now I got to give you a present, too.”, the brunette joked, before the bluenette’s arms flung around her neck.

“Thank you, Alya! Thank you!”, she whispered into her best friend’s hair but quickly pulled back in fear their teacher would see that and give them detention.

“Hey, no prob. I just felt like it and had to think of you, so there you go.”

Marinette smiled throughout the whole first lesson – or rather what was left of it.

 

* * *

 

After the first class was over she purposely only slowly packed her things so that she maybe would be able to talk to him. When she got up she ran right into a firm chest of someone, not noticing who it was before glancing up.

“A-Adrien! Wh-What a surprise! Heh-…”

He smiled down at her and held up the pen for her tablet.

“You dropped that. I thought you might want to have it back?”

She smiled fondly, hoping it would not be too wide, and shakily took the pen from his hand, shivering when their fingers touched. Alya quietly snickered while waiting for her at Nino’s and Adrien’s desk.

“Th-Thanks-… So, u-uh… Y-Yeah, thank you, I just wanted to-… Thank you, uh-… How about-…”

“Are you okay, Marinette?”, he grinned down at her and she thought she might just faint from the brightness of his teeth.

“Me?! I’m… I’m perfectly fine! Uh, how about y-you? I-I mean, if you’re ph-physically and m-mentally fine, uh-… And, not as in, if y-you’re physically fine, I mean, you are pretty f-fit and you’re a model so y-you have to be fine, right? Ahahaha, uh, b-but actually I meant-… Uh-… If you’re feeling healthy, as in-”

“It’s alright, Marinette, I’m fine.”, he interrupted her with a slight chuckle but she noted with relief that he wasn’t laughing at her, “I’m feeling pretty well, actually.”

She shyly smiled up to him, fumbling with her purse.

“Uh-… That’s awesome! A-And you’re awesome, ah, no, I mean-… Of course, you’re awesome, but you’re awesome as in-… Uh, p-picking up things for m-me? I-I’ll stop talking now…”

“Oh, it was nothing, really. Don’t worry, Marinette. Well then, see you!”

“Y-Yeah, bye-good! U-Uh, g-g-g-… S-See you!”

She sighed when he was waving her and went down the stairs to leave the classroom. Then, she threw an excited smile to Alya while she shouldered her bag and descended down the stairs.

“I knew you had it in you, girl! Now, let’s celebrate for the rest of the break, I’ve got orange juice for you!”

She laughed while walking out of the classroom and Marinette wanted to follow her but was held back by a rather strong and pinching grip. When she turned around, she saw Chloé holding her arm, looking furious.

_Uh-oh._

* * *

 

Marinette sobbed into her hands as she recalled Chloé’s hurtful words, each and every one of them.

_“You’re nothing! You’re not even worth yourself, much less your so-called friends! Don’t you see they just hang out with you because they pity you?! You’re worth the dirt under my feet, Marinette Dupain-Cheng. And you have no right to speak to me like that, you pathetic little brat. You don’t even have the right to speak to anyone! Just keep your stupid thoughts and ideas to yourself because nobody wants to hear them!”_

The bluenette had just talked a bit to Adrien, nothing big. She had even stumbled over her words again which had simply led to Adrien putting a hand on her shoulder and telling her to relax before going, but somehow the blonde had been very keen on yelling at Marinette like that.

Normally Marinette would have just not listened. But this time, Chloé had said something she had accidently kept in her head afterwards. That her friends were only with her because they pitied her.

Alya would never do that to her… Right?

The two girls had so many good memories with each other, like sleepovers when Alya was stroking Marinette’s hair and Marinette was telling her funny stories. When she was making Alya a dress and her best friend was spending countless hours with her, laughing, joking, standing still for Marinette while she was creating the dress around her. The both of them drinking hot chocolate while it was raining outside, watching a romantic movie together, crying their eyes out.

Alya had left the classroom already as Chloé had started yelling at Marinette, but as soon as her best friend had realized it was the bluenette that was yelled at, she had come storming right back in, yanking Chloé back on her shoulder, screaming at her in rage while guiding out the already crying Marinette. She couldn’t quite remember every word that Alya had screamed at the blonde because she had spoken way faster than usual and Marinette had kept this one sentence in her head, the one her life would be ruined by.

Alya had led her out of the classroom, still yelling back over her shoulder.

“AND IF YOU SPOILED BRAT DARE TO SPEAK TO HER LIKE THAT AGAIN, YOU’LL HEAR FROM ME AND I SWEAR YOU DON’T WANT THAT!”

Marinette had laid a calming hand on her best friend’s shoulder, making the brunette look at her questioning.

“It’s alright, Alya… It’s okay.”

“Marinette, we’re going to Mr. Damocles right now! This time Chloé will not get through with it.”

The bluenette had been led out by Alya, away from the blonde, past all her classmates, past Adrien.

He had looked at her, shocked. She had fixed her gaze to the ground to not have to see his eyes.

Right as she had been the first step down the stairs he had stormed into the classroom, eager to get Chloé to Mr. Damocles, but she hadn’t caught that anymore.

Hot tears had welled up in her eyes and she had tried to swallow down the big lump in her throat, without success.

As they had reached the schoolyard, Alya pulling her to the stairs that led up to Mr. Damocles office, she gently had removed her best friend’s hands from her arm.

“Alya-… Do you-… Do you pity me?”

The brunette had stopped dead in tracks, a light breeze playing with her hair as she turned to see her best friend’s cheeks wet. She had bitten on her lip and stepped forward to embrace Marinette.

“Of course. Chloé’s trying to turn your life into a living hell, so who does not?”

Marinette had pushed Alya away, shaking her head to not see her friend’s irritated face.

“So she was right! You’re only my friend because you pity me-… How we actually met, it was because of Chloé picking at me again.”

“Marinette, wait, that’s not what I’m saying-”

“Oh god, she knew it! Chloé was right and I’m all alone! I-… I need to go! Right now!”

The bluenette had turned and ran out of the school. Her friend had watched as she had left, already sobbing uncontrollably, helpless.

And now, Marinette laid on her bed, a strong feeling of hopelessness and loneliness filling her like water being poured into a bucket.

“T-Tikki, I knew it! All of my friends were a lie! Alya said so herself! I’m just a failure.”

Her little Kwami hugged her cheek the best she could but Marinette didn’t even care.

“Marinette, it’s not as bad as you think it is. You heard Alya, she wanted to say more. Probably she wanted to explain and assure you she really is your best friend.”

The girl shook her head violently, sending Tikki flying but the Kwami caught herself and sat down next to Marinette’s elbow.

“Please, just go back and listen to Alya. She wanted to tell you something.”

“I won’t listen to her! She’s just pitying me, she’s no real friend!”

Tikki punched into Marinette’s bed sheets and was about to tell her chosen she was wrong but something caught her attention. Marinette looked up to say more but she was silenced by Tikki’s worried look on her face, right before she flew off.

She knew it, not even her Kwami wanted to have anything to do with her. She sat up but only sobbed harder.

Marinette barely heard Tikki’s cry.

“Stay back, you filthy beast! Stay back! Don’t touch her!”

Suddenly she felt darkness, cold and somehow-… Moving? She had almost missed the dark Akuma flying towards her, vanishing in the bracelet Alya had gave to her just this morning. The next thing she knew was seeing Tikki floating right in front of her, pleading her with her big blue eyes before a cold voice filled her consciousness.

_“Hello, I am Hawkmoth.”_

“H-Hawkmoth-…?!”, she stuttered. She knew what came next.

_“Your friends let you down. You’re feeling lost and helpless. You think, everyone is pitying you, but you know better. You want to show everyone you’re worth being a true friend. I can give you the chance to show them all they’re wrong. Do we have a deal?”_

Marinette looked at Tikki in horror, not knowing what to do. She knew it was wrong but at the same time, the darkness pulled her, pushed her to do this.

“I-… I don’t-”

_“YOU WILL!”_

The power of Hawkmoth’s voice in her head was painful, way more than she imagined. It caused her to double over in agony, falling on her bed again.

“Okay, okay! I-… We have a deal!”, she screamed, wanting to stop the pain. She heard her mother calling up, even heard her footsteps on the stairs already.

“Maman, stay away!”, she cried out as loud as she could, “Get Papa and LEAVE! NOW!”

“Sweetie is everything al-”

“RUN, MAMAN!!”

Marinette felt the darkness travelling up her body and Tikki gestured to her ears. As fast as she could, the bluenette removed the Miraculous, causing her Kwami to vanish.

The transformation was finished and Marinette didn’t feel like herself anymore. She now had two sides. Herself and-… Someone. She wore a skin-tight suit, much like her suit as Ladybug, only this one was pitch black and had pink stripes on her arms and legs. Her feet and hands were completely pink, as was her mask. A pink stripe was around her thigh which grew over her chest into her signature flowers she had herself designed and sewed or glued on almost everything she owned. On her back was the pink ‘M’ she always signed her designs with.

Trembling, she glanced down to her fist and gulped inside, knowing she hadn’t been fast enough to throw them away. She opened it and her Miraculous, Ladybug’s Miraculous, were revealed. She could hear Hawkmoth hissing in her head.

_“You’re Ladybug?!”_

She knew that she shouldn’t answer that. Marinette knew it exactly, anyways.

But this other part in her, the akumatized, sobbing, hurt girl didn’t know. She just slightly grinned and pushed Marinette away.

“Yes I am. And I will bring you the Miraculous right away.”

Hawkmoth laughed so loudly the bluenette had to flinch, but her other Part laughed along with him, through her mouth. Marinette wasn’t in control anymore. The akumatized Part controlled her body now.

_“You shall be Miss Fortune then. Go spread your ‘luck’ and bring me Ladybug’s Miraculous. And then, hunt down Chat Noir. He won’t stand a chance against his own partner.”_

Suddenly Miss Fortunes head snapped around because of a yelp from the hatch and Marinette gulped.

Her mother was standing on the stairs, looking up to her daughters bed, only to see Marinette had been replaced with an akumatized victim. The girl wanted to scream at her mother to run, take her father and get away as far as possible, but she couldn’t do anything.

Miss Fortune stretched out a hand in the direction of her Maman and Marinette could only watch helplessly as strings of fabric shot out of her hand, winded themselves around Sabine’s neck and lifted her, bringing her closer to Miss Fortune’s face.

“No, I don’t need you. I don’t need anybody anymore.”, she snarled, throwing her mother down on the ground, knocking her out immediately.

“MAMAN NO! NOOOO! Hawkmoth, I’ll KILL you!”, Marinette yelled, but he just laughed.

_“I’d like to see that, Ladybug. Because for now, your hands are tied.”_

She struggled against Miss Fortune but the Akuma didn’t let her do anything. Marinette was powerless, she realized.

Miss Fortune climbed onto her balcony just as her father got into the room to see her and got away. A breeze brushed over her fingers as her hand left the closed hatch. They were making their way over the roofs of Paris for ten minutes now, nearing a building that almost looked like a dome for a telescope but Marinette knew, it wasn’t the Parisian observatory. It was a newly built thing that looked like an observatory and Marinette could imagine, that was a very good cover, just saying it was a private research station.

Miss Fortune slipped through the opened window and handed over her Miraculous to Hawkmoth. It was the first time Marinette saw him in person and she swore he reminded her of someone. Miss Fortune never said a word to Hawkmoth, neither did he while she was there. Her akumatized self already jumped out of the building again very quickly, as if to flee from the bad aura of the supervillain.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After she was akumatized and brought her Miraculous to Hawkmoth, Miss Fortune now targets those who did her wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a pretty heavy chapter, with a fight, a fatal lie and a very heartbroken Chat Noir.  
> You have been warned ;)

And before she knew it, they made their way to the school. Slowly it dawned to her what Miss Fortune wanted. Just a moment before she was akumatized, Marinette had thought about Alya and that-… She was a fake friend-… _OH NO!_

“STOP HAWKMOTH! STOP, PLEASE!! NOT ALYA!”, she screamed.

She watched helplessly as Miss Fortune crouched on the roof of the school and looked down to her classroom. Alya was sitting on her place, just like everyone. Chloé was still there too.

Miss Fortune smiled and let herself fall down, already thrilled to hurt, maybe _kill_ people.

Marinette screamed and yelled at Hawkmoth and Miss Fortune, trying to change their minds, hoping to protect her friends that way.

Neither of them reacted in any other way than laughing at her.

Miss Fortunes feet crashed through the glass of the classroom and Marinette saw her best friend’s fearful eyes.

“STOP HAWKMOTH! I SURRENDER, BUT PLEASE, LET ALYA GO!! Let my friends be…”, she sobbed.

Hawkmoth only laughed louder, making her head ache.

_“Oh no, you’ll watch. You’ll watch and suffer for everything you’ve ever thrown in my way to be victorious, Ladybug.”_

Miss Fortune reached out and let her strings of fabric wind themselves around Alyas neck, choking her forcefully while lifting her up. Alya already turned violet as she was in front of Miss Fortunes face.

“Real friend, huh? Let’s see who’s pitying whom now, shall we?”, her akumatized form whispered, just loud enough for Alya to hear.

The brunette’s eyes became big and her breaths became forced.

“M-Marinette-…?!”

Miss Fortune smiled evilly and threw Alya down on her desk, finally releasing her. Marinette could already see the marks the fabric left on her best friend’s neck. Alya glanced up, holding her neck, eyes full of sheer horror. Her gaze shifted over to Nino who laid by the teacher’s desk, terrified. He looked back at her, fearing Marinette’s akumatized form would actually kill the girl.

Alya turned her head again to lock the Akuma’s eyes with hers, now more confident.

Marinette began to understand what Alya would say next.

Slowly she shook her head but of course no one saw.

“Alya, no-… You don’t know what she’s capable of. Don’t, don’t mention Ladybug, please don’t’!”

But of course her best friend had no idea that it actually was Ladybug being the akumatized one this time. Marinette got louder, hoping someone would actually hear her, but of course it was only Hawkmoth laughing back.

“ALYA, RUN!! PLEASE!!”

Her best friend grinned confidently while Miss Fortune let her fabric press her harder onto the desk.

“Ladybug will come and she will save you, Marinette. She’ll save us all. Just hang in there a little longer.”

Marinette wanted to cry, wanted to yell at her classmates to leave as fast as they could because this time, Ladybug would not be able to save them.

“NOO! DON’T DO THIS TO THEM HAWKMOTH!! DON’T, I BEG OF YOU-…”

Her words went by unheard and she was cut off by her own voice.

“Ladybug is dead. I killed her.”, Miss Fortune snarled, grinning at the sight of Alya’s face slowly falling desperate, “She cried and pleaded to let her live but I showed no mercy. I removed the Miraculous from her and left her to bleed out. She has stopped breathing by now, trust me.”

“NOOOOOOOO!!!”, a voice cried out, smacking Miss Fortune in the head with a baton, “LADYBUG IS NOT DEAD!! SHE’LL COME!!”

Chat Noir landed right behind Alya on the desk. With ease he pushed away the fabric pinning Alya down to the desk now that Miss Fortune was distracted. He lent the brunette a helping hand and brought her to safety while the Akuma was still distracted by the pain the baton had caused.

Meanwhile Marinette was struggling to break free.

“NO!! HAWKMOTH, STOP THIS RIGHT NOW!! I’LL KILL YOU, YOU PSYCHOPATH!! YOU’RE JUST SICK!! LADYBUG ISN’T DEAD!!”

_“Oh, but Ladybug, you said so yourself. The hero is dead. You killed her by letting a comment of a spoiled brat get to you and now I have her – your – Miraculous. My question: How will you explain this to them while not telling them your secret identity? Oh wait-… You’re Ladybug’s murderer. Nobody will believe you anyway.”_

Marinette broke down weeping while her body hunted down Chat to take his Miraculous too.

“No-… No, please-… Don’t do this to me-… To them-… Anything, but-… Hawkmoth please, I already surrendered. Please leave them be and please let Miss Fortune set that right again.”

_“Never! Ladybug’s dead and it will stay that way!”_ , he hissed.

Marinette closed her eyes, hopeless. Anywhere she looked through Miss Fortunes eyes, she found desperate eyes, fear and pain, crying friends.

Chat fought well on his own but maybe it was just because he was raging. Tears streamed down his cheeks in a straight line as soon as he realized Miss Fortune was right with Ladybug not showing up. Slowly he started to believe that Ladybug was really dead, Marinette could see it in his slumped shoulders, his defeated face.

“So, kitty? Are you out of breath?”, Miss Fortune hissed. It seemed to give Chat the last push he needed.

“YOU WILL PAY!!”

Yelling, he jumped and brought down his baton with all might. Miss Fortunes shoulder cracked. Then he punched her in the stomach and lastly, he landed a kick on her cheek bone, breaking it with a loud and sickening noise.

The Akuma fell to her knees, finally giving Marinette the chance to gain back the control over her body.

“Chat-…”, she breathed, her throat feeling sore, “The bracelet-…”

Marinette held out her hand and showed him the colorful bracelet Alya had given her just this morning. He walked over to her, his face a grimace. Dust of destroyed walls, that had been lifted from the ground by a light breeze, clung to his black suit, giving it a new pattern, almost drawing forms on the black fabric.

“Oh, so you’ve come to your senses? Well, it’s too late now.”

He punched her in the broken shoulder, causing a massive wave of pain, almost knocking her unconscious. She fell to her unharmed side, still holding out her arm where the bracelet was located.

“Please-… Just destroy it-… Set the Akuma free, Chat, please-… It’s Marinette-…”

Chat’s facial expression only hardened. He raised a boot, kicking her in the ribs, cracking a few of them.

“You killed my lady.”

He kicked her again and Marinette began to feel scared. This time there would be no cleansing light, so this time the injuries on the Akuma would last on her body, at least they wouldn’t vanish with all of Hawkmoth’s evil. Luckily, Chat had decided to not use his cataclysm. The girl did not want to know what had happened if he did, for the balance between Destruction and Creation would have been disturbed.

The feline hero raised his foot again, but Marinette cried out.

“CHAT PLEASE, THE BRACELET!! DESTROY IT!”

He finally let go of her, after another kick to the forehead. The blonde kneeled down next to her and took off the bracelet. With a yank it was ripped in two. A black butterfly flew out and tried to flee but Chat took his bell and caught it, trapping it inside.

With a flash, Marinette felt Miss Fortune leaving her body. She didn’t even hear Hawkmoth as he slipped out of her mind, leaving behind a beaten up Marinette. Luckily for her, the magic had protected her Marinette-self from sustaining major injuries. While Miss Fortune had had broken limbs and ribs, she only got a dislocated shoulder and a few really painful bruises on her ribs and cheek bone.

Groaning, she sat up, blinking a few times. Blood dripped into her eye and she quickly closed it, running her hand over her forehead to prevent more blood from dripping down. As she looked at her hand she flinched by the amount of blood that clung to it.

Chat sat next to her, with hunched shoulders, sobbing quietly.

“Chat-…?”, she questioned, “Chat Noir?”

The boy in black leather looked over to her but avoided to meet her gaze. She slowly reached out but stopped herself before touching him.

“Chat, you have to believe me-… Please, Ladybug is not dead.”

His head snapped up and faster than she could process it, he had slapped her. She instantly knew it was not with all his strength, because she had seen Chat in action and this was more of a pat even if her head was flung to the side. She gasped but turned to face Chat again.

“Please, I need to talk to you. Ladybug’s not dead and I can prove it to you.”

“SHUT UP! The last thing I need now is a girl, humiliated by her fucking classmate like every fucking day, the murderer of my lady trying to tell me the girl she killed is NOT DEAD! I don’t need you to apologize, I don’t need you trying to make me feel better and I certainly don’t need you to talk to me in any way! Just-… GET LOST!”

Tears welled up in Marinette’s eyes as he left.

A breeze stroke over her wet cheek when he got up and she watched him jump up to the roof, running away, probably off to somewhere quiet.

Alone, she sat in the middle of the schoolyard, being watched by the students who were hiding in classrooms and on the gallery of the school.

She looked around, finding Alya’s gaze. Her friend kneeled next to Nino, still holding her neck, eyeing her. Marinette quickly looked away and tried to get up. She managed to get to her feet and gave it her best to walk out of the school without making any eye-contact with anyone.

As she reached the bakery she was completely exhausted.

But the bluenette was wide awake again when she realized there was an ambulance parking right in front of her parent’s house. She remembered her mother being knocked out by Miss Fortune and stumbled forward, up the stairs to see her mother laying on the couch, surrounded by her father and two emergency doctors.

Everyone looked up when she barged in.

“M-… Maman-… Papa-…”, she pressed out, still hesitant if they would reject her too.

There was a silence between them until one of the doctors finally gave in and walked over to her.

“You’re hurt too. Let me see that.”

He touched her shoulder while she didn’t break the eye-contact with her parents. She yelped out as he moved it, biting on her quivering lip.

“Yes, it’s dislocated. I want you to stay focused and bite down on that towel here.”

She nodded, biting down on the fabric but almost spitting it out because the memory of a certain other fabric made her want to throw up. A wave of pain flooded her consciousness and she felt her shoulder plopping back into its place. Shortly after, her world went black and she collapsed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And from here on, things will escalate...


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone tries to cope with the aftermath - which proves to be a little harder than they thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is just the beginning, everyone.  
> I've still got so much more planned and Marinette wil have a real, serious problem from now on.  
> Everything that was mentioned here will just become worse... ;)  
> Also, introduction Alya's family! I know she has younger twin siblings in the series but I wrote this before I knew them and thought it'd be cute this way as well. Plus it's a reference, let's see who recognizes them!  
> Now have fun reading~

Alya still felt Nino’s arm wrapped around her waist as he brought her home. She had told him she could walk by herself but he hadn’t believed it so now he was practically carrying her. She had lied when she had said she could walk alone.

Marinette had turned.

Worse, Marinette had turned on _her_.

After all they’d done together, after all they’ve been through, after everything that Alya had believed had been the strongest friendship she’d ever had. And then Marinette got akumatized because of something stupid Chloé had said to her! Something that Marinette _knew_ wasn’t true. And Alya had even defended her, shutting Chloé up and how had Marinette repaid her? She had doubted their friendship. Hadn’t believed in her loyalty. Had attacked her, her best friend, because of something someone said who you couldn’t believe a word that left her mouth anyway.

And on top of all, she had killed Ladybug.

Of course, it had been her akumatized form, but Alya didn’t care. It was Marinette’s body and it had been her mind that had said yes to Hawkmoth. Miss Fortune was a part of Marinette just as much as Lady Wifi had been a part of her.

When they reached her home Alya didn’t open the door right away but instead hugged Nino tightly. She didn’t want him to go.

“N-Nino, p-… Please stay…”, she murmured, her voice hoarse and raspy from being choked by Miss Fortune. He just looked down at her and nodded, pressing a little kiss to her forehead. She closed her eyes and sighed, leaning into his embrace and her head resting against his lips.

She could stay like this for all eternity, just being held and comforted by him.

Way too quickly he parted them, smiling softly as he took the key from her weak fingers, twisting it in the lock of the door and pushing it open, only to be greeted by her mother and her younger sisters rushing from the living room to look after her. They had been worried to no end when they had seen the Akuma attack on TV, having witnessed how Miss Fortune had fought with Chat Noir in the school her daughter was attending classes in right at that moment and telling everyone she had killed Ladybug.

Alya pictured how her mother and her sisters had to see her now.

Ripped and dirty clothes, disheveled hair, bloodshot eyes and a very bruised neck, practically just hanging from Nino’s arms with slumped shoulders.

She saw her mother’s eyes watering and her siblings gasping when Nino helped her onto the couch, sitting down next to her. Alya watched as her mother kneeled down before her and took her hands, silently asking what happened. After she had gulped all the brunette girl could say was her best friend’s name, the girl’s name who had killed Ladybug.

“M-Mari-… Marinette-…”, she stuttered and her mother shook her head, not believing what she had told her. Nino leant onto Alya’s shoulder and pressed his cheek to her hair in a comforting manner, nodding to her mother as an answer.

Marlena Césaire clenched her teeth as she looked at the wreck that was her daughter, her eyes half closed from the exhaustion to even get home.

“Alya, let’s get you to bed. Nino, if you could be so kind and carry her?”

The boy nodded and got to his feet to gently scoop the girl up in his arms, carrying her to her room. Marlena followed right after, holding open the door for him to step through sideways and settle down Alya on her bed. He left the room for mother and daughter to be alone and sat down on the couch again, all three younger sisters of his friend snuggling up to him.

The youngest, Jazz, climbed into his lap and softly touched his cheek where tears ran down, briefly looking at her now wet fingers, then looking up to him again. He hadn’t noticed he had started crying. It must’ve been because Alya was finally out of danger. So, he sighed and placed a comforting hand on Jazz’ head, her hair being so similar to her bigger sister’s. He was ready to fall asleep just like this, the girls snuggling up around him, Geena, the oldest after Alya, and Amber, between Jazz and Geena, to his sides and heads resting on his shoulders and Jazz lying on his chest but as Marlena came out of the room about half an hour later she asked him to get back to Alya because she had asked for him.

He carefully, with Marlena’s help, got the three girls to all lie comfortably on the couch fast asleep, then he walked back to see Alya again, after thanking Marlena for tucking Alya into bed.

“Oh Nino, I have to thank you. You brought my girl back to me. You’re a hero for her.”

He just slowly shook his head and smiled.

“The hero is Chat Noir. And Ladybug. What happened today… It was an accident. But the true hero is Marinette.”, he sighed when Marlena frowned, “I saw her fighting Hawkmoth herself. On the inside. Then, at the end, she told Chat where to find the Akuma, having won against Hawkmoth’s influence and regained control over her body. That never happened. Everybody sees her as a murderer… But I won’t, because she was just as much a victim as Ladybug. And she’ll need someone to tell that to her.”

Marlena took a deep breath and looked him directly in the eyes.

“Possessed or not, murderer or not, she attacked my daughter. _Marinette_ attacked my daughter. I don’t know if I can ever see her differently again.”

Nino knew she had every right to say that. Alya was one of her beloved daughters and after having to have lost her husband, she wouldn’t be able to bear just the thought of losing one of them as well.

“It was not Marinette, Mrs. Césaire. It was Miss Fortune. These are two different personalities.”

With that he turned around after hinting to a bow with his head and entered Alya’s room. It was dimly lit and his eyes had to adjust for that before seeing her form under the blanket, shivering either because of the temperature or shock.

He cleared his throat and walked up to the bed as she didn’t react.

“Alya?”, she glanced up when he kneeled down before the bed. He smiled reassuringly and softly stroke her cheek, trying to comfort her, “You feeling okay?”

She lightly nodded, hiding her nose in her blanket and sighing, her whole body still shivering. So, he just leaned against the edge of the bed, pressing his forehead against hers.

“I’m sorry for what happened today…”, he felt her shaking her head and saw her eyes being closed.

“D-Don’t be sorry…”, she whispered with a hoarse voice, lightly tracing his jaw with her fingers. He sighed and closed his eyes, enjoying her touch, enjoying to feel she was still alive.

The Akuma hadn’t gone easy on her best friend. Her neck was getting darker in color the longer the incident laid back.

Nino sighed. Even if Miss Fortune had done this, it had been Marinette to say yes to the possession. So, he just waited, with his forehead pressed to hers until she was asleep.

When Nino headed home, he somehow felt empty. Emotionally exhausted. This day had been a disaster.

* * *

 

As Marinette awoke again, she found herself lying on the couch where her mother had laid before. It must’ve been at least a few hours because outside it was darkening.

Her father sat beside her, his face blank while watching the news. She turned her head and saw a terrifying version of her floating at least a meter above the ground, laughing at Chat who laid in front of her. She didn’t even remember that part of the fight.

She watched herself open the mouth and heard her voice humiliating Chat, repeating that Ladybug was dead. Her father shook his head.

“P-Papa?”, she hesitantly asked.

Tom Dupain met her gaze and glanced to her shoulder lying in a sling across her stomach.

“Y-You should go to bed, daughter.”, he forced out, turning to face the TV again.

Marinette bit on her lip keeping herself from beginning to cry. She knew her father probably was disappointed in her and didn’t want to talk to her, but she had to ask something else first.

“H-How’s Maman?”

He sighed and kept his watch on the TV.

“She’s going to be okay. She’s resting in bed right now.”

Marinette nodded and stood up, her knees shaking, but she managed. She knew her father wouldn’t help her.

“Goodnight, Papa-…”, her father flinched at the nickname she had given him when she was younger, “I-… I’m sorry.”

He simply nodded and with that she was dismissed. Slowly, Marinette made her way up the stairs and quietly closed the hatch behind her.

“Tikki?”, it was that irrational hope her Kwami would still be at her side. Biting away the tears she sighed and climbed up to her bed, where she had been akumatized. She closed her eyes and after half an hour of lying awake she fell into a troubled sleep.

* * *

 

Adrien had never felt so empty before. Granted, when his mother had vanished he had felt like this, but at least he had still known she was alive. Now with Ladybug…

He sighed.

Just how could he even realize his lady was gone? He slumped on the bed, not crying, not groaning, not doing anything, really.

He just laid there, not really able to wrap his mind around what had happened.

Marinette. His classmate. The determined girl, always so altruistic, always so caring. He never imagined it’d be possible for her to be akumatized. She was always so sweet and optimistic. And yet… She had said yes to Hawkmoth. She had let him possess her, she had…

A sob flooded his body as he curled up into a ball.

Only now it really occurred to him, the realization running down his back as an icy shiver. He’s alone now. He’s lost his lady, he’s lost his partner. More sobs shook his body as he gripped the sheets and let himself fall into his grief.

“… Kid?”, Plagg asked after a while. The little black cat looked just as exhausted as Adrien felt, “Kid, please go to sleep…”

Adrien just wailed louder and pressed his face into the pillow.  
“Please Adrien. Tomorrow it’ll be different.”

“I-I’ll be a-alone!”, he sobbed, “L-Ladybug’s gone! I-I’ll have t-to fight against him alone!”

Plagg sighed and floated down next to his chosen’s head, softly placing a tiny paw on his skin.

“I know… I know, kid… But you’ll manage… I’ll always stay by your side, okay?”

Suddenly he felt the blonde model reaching out to him and beginning to stroke him behind his ears. Plagg silently laid down and continued to brush over Adrien’s forehead. No more words were needed. They just laid next to each other, grieving their own way. Because even if Plagg knew that Tikki wasn’t dead – because then he’d have vanished as well, being her yin – he didn’t know where she was. He didn’t know if Hawkmoth had her or if her Miraculous had been lost or if it was still with the girl. But if it had been with Ladybug… Then Hawkmoth would have it for sure…

The boy’s breaths evened out next to him and Plagg sighed again, curling up as well to face Adrien. Tears still trailed down his face but the sobs had subsided. Tomorrow was a new day. Maybe they’d be able to find her Miraculous. Maybe Ladybug was able to hide it somewhere. Or had told Tikki to escape with it. Maybe it wasn’t too late yet.

The tiny black cat closed his eyes as well. Soon they were both asleep.

* * *

 

The next morning, she awoke with a little yelp.

She’d had a nightmare, a nightmare in which she had really killed Ladybug. But not only Ladybug, no, she’d also killed her parents, Alya, Adrien and Chat. Cold sweat ran down her neck and she breathed heavily.

Still, it was just a dream.

Groaning she got up and put her arm into the sling once again after she dressed and tried her best to cover her injuries with make-up. It was still half an hour before school would start and she didn’t want to confront her parents yet. They were disappointed in her for being akumatized, for ‘killing’ Paris greatest hero.

Everyone thought so. She knew, somehow she had to convince them, but she didn’t know how. Hawkmoth had her Miraculous and she had no chance to get them back. Tikki wasn’t with her anymore and nobody believed her. Everyone just saw her as a murderer.

Marinette could’ve almost laughed.

The murderer of herself, for she actually _was_ Ladybug.

And even if she told everyone who she was, revealing her true identity, still nobody would believe her. Because she was just Marinette. A murderer, looking like she was trying to set everything right with a hopeless lie. She sighed and leaned back on her chair. Somehow, a little while later, she managed to get up and went to her dressing table, wiping away all of the make-up she had put on earlier today.

Her face had been relatively unremarkable up until now. Skin-colored became blue, violet and green again. She didn’t want to look alright. She wanted to look as she felt – beaten up. As a victim of Hawkmoth, not an innocent looking murderer.

The bluenette checked the time. Still fifteen minutes.

She shrugged and grabbed her bag, opening the hatch. Downstairs, her parents already waited for her. Marinette avoided to lock her eyes with theirs, reaching the bottom of the stairs. As she looked up, it broke her heart to see her mother being held up by her father, a bandage around her head.

“I-… I am so sorry, Maman-…”

She turned to flee through the front door but the voice of her mother held her back.

“Marinette, look at me please.”

The girl turned again to see her mother taking a step towards her. She kept her gaze glued on her feet. Her mother approached her and gently tried to make her daughter look at her, but Marinette flinched away and Sabine stopped her hand.

“You’re hurt, Marinette. Please let me look at it.”

“It’s nothing.”, she said too quickly, “Chat Noir kicked me. It’s fine. It doesn’t even hurt anymore.”

_Bullshit_ , she thought, _I gotta keep a poker face all day so I won’t cry_.

But what would be the real reason for her tears? Her own beaten up face – or these of her family and friends she, no, Miss Fortune, had hurt.

As she walked to the door again to get out of here, she heard her mother sigh. She risked a glance over her shoulder to see her father’s face hardening. She knew she had lost him as she, no, _Miss Fortune_ , had injured her mother. And she had lost him again as he had heard that she as her akumatized form had killed Ladybug.

Slowly she herself started to believe that Ladybug was dead, she realized with a frown.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What to do with a murderer in the class?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, we're getting into it, slowly.  
> Keep in mind that this is an extreme situation for Marinette and everyone else and that nobody should be judged for what they say.  
> They're young and shocked and don't know how to handle the situation, neither of them is acting responsibly or rationally.  
> They're all hurting and mourning someone who's right in front of them but they don't know that.

Marinette reached the school ten minutes too early.

Many students that waited for the classes to start glanced over to her. Some even stared at her without any shame. Of course, they must all have watched the news. Luckily for her, her name hadn’t been on TV, but in the age of the internet she would be as popular as Ladybug herself. For murdering her. Murdering herself.

_Since when did suicides get that much attention?_ she sarcastically asked herself.

Silently she made her way to the stairs leading up to her classroom.

The room was already open, so she stepped inside. Alya sat at her place, along with half of the students in her class. Nino was there too. He raised his gaze to see her and stood up.

“Hey, Marinette.”, he quietly said, “Should I help you with your bag?”

She kept her eyes downwards as she walked past him and shook her head.

“Thanks, Nino-… But I’ll manage.”

He nodded, glancing up to Alya, afraid of how it would go between the two girls. Marinette sat down next to Alya, noticing she wore a scarf.

“Hey-…”, she tried.

Alya looked away, hiding her chin in her scarf. Her friend never wore scarfs, she remembered. Presumably, the brunette was hiding her injuries Miss Fortune had caused.

Marinette swallowed and turned to inspect her fists, lying on the desk, trembling. Tears clouded her vision once again.

“Alya-… Please, I’m sorry for what happened to you yesterday-…”

She still didn’t respond to her, so the bluenette kept on talking.

“I’m sorry I had let Chloé get to me. I’m sorry, I – Miss Fortune – choked you. I’m sorry for everything.”

“Even for Ladybug?”, her friend whispered. Her voice was sore, probably from all the choking, screaming and crying the day before. Marinette was shocked.

“Y-You too? You believe her lie too?”

“What lie?”, Alix threw at her, “Ladybug didn’t show up. And you said you killed her! So what’s your excuse?”

“ _Miss Fortune_ said that-”, Marinette began, wanting to explain how she was powerless as everyone must’ve been as they were akumatized. Alya had to know, Nino, Alix, _hell, everyone_ in this class had to know. But she was cut off by Max.

“You _are_ Miss Fortune.”

“ _My bad feelings were_ Miss Fortune, but-”

“Don’t you start turning everything in your favor, Marinette!”, Sabrina hissed.

“Yeah, you killed Ladybug!”, Kim decided to speak it out loud and everyone went silent. Marinette felt tears welling up in her eyes but fought them down.

“Sh-She’s n-not d-dead!”, she tried, but was interrupted once again by Rose, sweet and shy Rose.

“How do you know?! You can’t remember anything so how could you possibly-…”

“She wasn’t herself!”, Nino finally called out. He stood up and slammed his fist on the table, “Hell, all of you had been akumatized already. Don’t you remember nothing, too? She didn’t know what she was doing and this damn Hawkmoth just controlled her body to do anything he says.”

It was not entirely true, Marinette did remember the most of her akumatization, but she was grateful for Nino to step up for her. Although now, Kim stood up and faced Nino, fury in his face.

“So then! She can’t tell whether she killed Ladybug or not. And because Ladybug didn’t show up we have to believe her!”

Nino bit on his lip, not knowing what to say next. Defeated, he sat down. Marinette locked their eyes for just a moment, letting Nino know she appreciated what he had said. However, then Alya spoke up again, scooting away from her ever so slightly.

“You hurt me-… You said I was no real friend.”

“Alya, I-…”, Marinette tried but soon she was stopped because the tears wouldn’t let her finish her sentence anymore. Alya was right. Marinette had called her a fake friend. She could only imagine how deeply it had hurt her best friend to hear those words while being choked. Nino opened his mouth but Marinette shook her head. He nodded and turned to face the teachers desk.

The bluenette tried again.

“Alya, please, you’re-… You’re my best friend and I was a fool to-…”

“S-Stop talking, Marinette. You’ve hurt me enough now. Just-… sh-shut up.”

She rested her chin on her arms and faced the window which was still shattered. At least the shards of glass were removed. A light breeze swept through the hole, painfully remembering her of how Chat had left the day before.

The girl found herself speechless. Helpless, she glanced over to Nino but he also had his back turned to her.

Silently she bit on her lip, willing herself not to burst out her secret. She knew, nobody would believe her anyway. And she had to keep her secret identity to herself. Suddenly Adrien stumbled into the classroom, closely followed by Chloé who clung to his hand. He didn’t seem to mind, because for once she didn’t seem to be the Chloé she used to be. She was broken, everyone could see it. Apparently, Ladybug really had had a place in Chloé’s heart, after all at least someone. And now that Chloé had actually lost someone she adored, she was, for presumably the first time in her life, human. Normally, Marinette would have had her arm thrown in the air, maybe shared a high-five with Alya and called it a point of hers, high score. But the world was a different now.

Alya would never high-five her again, nobody would laugh about that and she wouldn’t ever be able to speak to anyone but maybe Nino in her class.

Adrien led Chloé to her seat and she sat down, holding his hand a little longer. But it was not trying to win him over. It was not trying to throw herself at him. She simply needed support and Adrien, being the helpful friend he had ever been, never losing his patience, was willing to give it to her.

Marinette sighed and was about to turn her gaze down to her hands again but Adrien had heard her. He looked up at her and was slightly surprised to see her here already.

But then, his eyes changed. They changed to the same dull expression Alya had. Although, he had something stronger in it, something inside him that Alya still needed to figure out. But Marinette was sure she had seen the spark inside her best friend’s eyes, the spark that had ignited the fire behind Adrien’s green irises.

The fire of hate.

She quickly broke their gaze, afraid to burn herself.

_Strange, I thought fire stood for anger or passion. And ice for hate. I assume, hate can be as heated as anger._

But as soon as she met gazes with Alya again she understood.

It was burning like hell’s fire.

Hate had many sides. And the silent hate, the creeping one, slowly sneaking into someone’s mind, was cold. The one fueled by anger, the sudden hate, was just as hot as anger itself, a burning sensation, setting flames to every part of the body.

Finally, Madame Bustier came in and even though she looked a little out of it, she began the lesson. Marinette didn’t even bother to try and follow the history of the roman empire. She knew, Madame Bustier wouldn’t let her say anything anyways, judging by the looks she gave her midnight-haired student. She was a murderer. Probably to anyone by now.

Finally, lunch break came around. Normally she would have gone to the bakery with Alya, as she had done just the day before her akumatization. This time, Alya quickly packed her things and shakily stood up. Limping, she hurried to the door, closely followed by Nino. He shot an apologetic look over his shoulder but Marinette didn’t care. She’d seen it coming.

So she packed her things quietly, receiving a bump from Kim as well as Alix against her bad shoulder. But the bluenette didn’t even try to make a sound. She knew, it wouldn’t end well.

And not for the first time, she wished Tikki was by her side.

 

* * *

 

Alya tossed and turned in her bed, unable to fall asleep. Marinette had seemed sorry about her and what happened – but not about Ladybug! What had been with her?!

The brunette girl growled and rolled over to her other side again, her fingers digging into the sheets. She just wasn’t able to wrap her mind around it! Why was Marinette being so unreasonable?! She sighed and took her pillow to turn it over and lay on the cold side. It helped only a little until she switched sides again. Maybe Nino was still awake…?

She reached for her phone and pulled up his contact. Should she call him? Maybe it was rude? They weren’t really close friends… Okay, he was Marinette’s childhood friend and Adrien’s best friend, so they counted as close enough friends to call him at half past midnight, right?

She groaned and just pressed call. It wouldn’t be as bad and she needed someone to talk to.

_“Nino Lahiffe speaking, hello?”_ , his voice sounded through the line and Alya eased up. His voice alone made her calm down.  
“Hey Nino…”

_“Alya, hey. Are you okay?”_ , he immediately sounded worried.

“Uhm… Dunno… Define okay.”, she sighed, lying on her back.  
_“Can’t sleep?”_ , he asked knowingly.

She groaned and nodded before noticing that he couldn’t see her.

“Yeah… I dunno… It just annoys me that Marinette’s so-… So-… I dunno, she seems like she doesn’t even care about Ladybug’s death. As if it didn’t even happen for her.”

Nino took a second before answering.

_“… I know… Seems strange. But maybe she has a reason?”_

Alya snorted at that.

“You mean she feels ashamed? I would’ve thought she had that much honor to show her shame then instead of insisting it didn’t happen.”, the boy on the other end of the line stayed silent and Alya shrank back into her sheets, “… Nino? Are you still there?”

The boy gave a little huff as a response, then another moment of silence followed before he spoke up again.

_“I am…”_

She bit her lip.

“Sorry ‘bout that honor thing… That was mean…”

_“Apologize to Marinette.”_ , he bit back but just as suddenly as his answer came he sighed, _“Sorry… Just-… I’ve known her from the diapers. I know she wouldn’t just deny something like that. After all it was her akumatized form what reason would she have to deny Ladybug’s death?”_

The girl rolled her eyes.

“You’re still staying with your ‘she’s-not-at-fault’ thing?”

Her friend growled at that.

_“Yes. It was Miss Fortune, not Marinette. She’s not to blame and if anything, she needs help and support now. How would you feel if Lady Wifi had killed Ladybug?”_

Alya groaned.

“Well, I certainly wouldn’t have acted like it hadn’t happened because it is just like this. Ladybug didn’t show up anymore. We didn’t know her civilian identity so we have to rely on what we have. And what we have is a boasting Akuma, telling everyone she killed Ladybug. Marinette’s akumatized form. We have to believe her so why doesn’t she believe herself?”

_“Well, first of all, she should believe Miss Fortune, not herself, because the Akuma wasn’t herself. I wasn’t Bubbler and you weren’t Lady Wifi. And second, it’s been a day. She doesn’t remember anything from her akumatization. Nobody, nobody except Miss Fortune saw Ladybug die. Maybe Marinette just hopes she isn’t dead.”_

“But why wouldn’t Ladybug show herself then?!”

She could hear a rustling of fabric, then someone falling on something soft. Nino must’ve gone to bed.

_“I dunno… Maybe she’s prevented to do so.”_ , he sighed a final time _, “Listen, Alya, maybe you should just try to sleep. This all is a bit heavy for this time.”_

“Yeah… Yeah, I guess you’re right…”, she huffed and then spoke again, her voice shy and uncertain, “You-… You’ll be there tomorrow, right?”

She heard him chuckling.

_“Yeah, I’ll be there for you, Alya. Sleep well.”_

“Good night…”

As soon as she’d hung up she felt alone again. But at least a bit calmer than before. And finally, sleep got the better of her, too – a few hours later.

 

* * *

 

“What do we do with a murderer in our class?!”, Kim suddenly burst out.

Instantly, Nino rose to his feet and glared at the sporty guy. He was just grateful Marinette had immediately gone home after class.

“Marinette’s not a murderer.”

“You’re only saying that because you’re crushing on her!”, he bit back. Nino’s eyes narrowed.

“She’s my friend. She was your friend once. I – in contrary to you – believe Miss Fortune killed Ladybug. Marinette’s innocent.”

Kim wildly gestured and nodded.

“That’s exactly what I’m saying! You’re still crushing on her, you didn’t even deny it!”

Nino didn’t notice Alya flinching when he became red and stomped on the floor.

“I am denying it! I’m not in love with her anymore! I’ve just known her since her birth and _I know_ she’s not guilty! Miss Fortune killed Ladybug, not Marinette!”

“And yet she said yes to Hawkmoth…”, Adrien murmured next to him, his gaze cast down at his hands. Nino sighed and was tempted to clench a fist but decided to force himself to remain calm. His voice became softer as he talks to his best friend.

“Adrien, you’re the only one who hasn’t been akumatized before, you don’t know how alluring it is…”

The blonde merely shrugged and continued staring down at his hands. Nino knew he had a crush on Ladybug but he didn’t know it had been this bad. Adrien barely ate, barely slept and social interaction has become a burden to him which was unusual for the normally so outgoing boy.

“But what do we do about her?!”, Kim regained Nino’s attention, causing Chloé to stand up along with him.

“He’s right!”, she snarled, “I say we ban her.”

Nino bit his lip and allowed himself a quick glance at Alya. Normally it was her job to defend people when Marinette couldn’t do it. The girl slowly packed her things in her bag, most likely to listen to their debate. He couldn’t hope on back up from her then.

“We can’t ban Marinette.”, he began calmly, “She’s just as much a student as we are. She’s not to blame for what happened. It’d be unjustified. Besides, we don’t have the power to ban her from our class.”

_And I wouldn’t be able to stand up for her anymore_ , he thought to himself.

“But she’s a shame! I don’t want her here!”

“Chloé, calm down-…”, he tried but Sabrina jumped up, eager to agree with Chloé.

“I’m saying Chloé’s right! Marinette doesn’t have a right to set herself equal to us! We’re innocent and she’s not!”

Nino rolled his eyes and massaged his temples.

“She’s just as innocent as we are! And she’s miserable, doesn’t anybody besides me see that?”, he shot a hopeful glance towards Alya but she bit her lip and fixed her gaze on the wall beside her. His eyes shifted up to Nathaniel who sat behind Alya but the boy’s shoulders were hunched as if he’d shortly get his death sentence, “Oh come on, guys! Nobody framed me for literally kidnapping all the adults of Paris! I threatened to kill them! Nobody convicted Rose for manipulating people! Nobody dragged Max to court because he destroyed quite a part of the city! Heck, Alix let people vanish into thin air to use their life power!”

“That’s because everything was restored after the attacks happened! But without Ladybug’s miraculous healing light everything stays! Because she’s dead!”, Max now exclaimed, shaking of anger.

“But Marinette _can’t_ be blamed for this! She was akumatized!”, Nino shot back. Just then almost everyone, except for Alya, Nathaniel, Ivan and Mylène stood up.

“She was Miss Fortune!”

“She _is_ Miss Fortune!”

“She’s to blame!”

“She killed Ladybug!”

“She deserves this!”

“No, she deserves to die just like Ladybug!”

“Yeah, to feel what she did!”

That’s when Nino exploded. All of this, everyone going against Marinette, it was too much. He still remembered her as his best friend throughout the years, as his playmate and even crush, her innocence and kindness she showed to everyone, even Lila!

“ENOUGH!!”, he yelled and everyone stilled. Alya and Adrien flinched away since they hadn’t expected Nino to raise his voice. He never raised his voice at anything, “She’s a girl! She’s not even eighteen yet! She was sad and someone helped her out, fucking bad luck that Hawkmoth was faster than any of you to care for her! You’re wishing for her death, you realize that?! You’re wishing for her to get off this world! She has family here! How would you feel if one day she didn’t come to school anymore because _she killed herself_?! Oh, and you’d know that this time, you’d be the murderers! You’d be to blame for this! How does that feel, huh?! How does it feel to only do so much and _imagine_ you’re a murderer?! Now just try to do so much as _fathom_ how it must feel for her!! Being blamed to kill a hero without even remembering it!! Shit, she woke up to feel Chat Noir kicking her in the face! And when she tries to apologize afterwards she meets people who were her friends but now act like she’s their mortal enemy!! HOW DOES THAT FUCKING FEEL?!”

He sent a glare around him, making everyone shrink back. His fiery eyes halted on Alya for a moment and he huffed, taking his bag and storming out of the classroom. While he left the school building by descending the stairs leading down to the sidewalk he failed to notice the old man interestedly eyeing him.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And Marinette spirals down further...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys!  
> I wanted to thank everyone fo reviewing and I'm always looking forward for new reviews, I literally squeal every single time I have a new one! :D If you wanna write with me in private please feel free, I'm always happy to talk to you guys! You can do so on my tumblr: awesomefreckledjesus  
> If you have questions or requests or want me to write a prompt for you (I also have a prompt list), my inbox and ask is always open!  
> But for now, enjoy~

The days went by monotonously. Everyone got used to Marinette saying nothing at all anymore, and so did she. She knew, it would destroy her on the inside, but she didn’t care.

Nobody cared about her, so why should she?

It had been five weeks now that Miss Fortune had showed her face and was beaten by Chat Noir. Marinette liked to call it “The Defeat” or “The Incident” rather than “The Day Marinette Killed Ladybug”. However, she had given it a thought or two, actually finding she really _had_ killed Ladybug that day. She hadn’t been fast enough to hide her earrings and so, she had handed over Ladybug to Hawkmoth.

Tikki’s words that she was Ladybug 24/7, with or without Spots, were long forgotten.

She had asked Nathaniel to sit next to Ivan a few days after the incident, leaving her and Alya to each sit alone.

Her former best friend didn’t seem to care. Or notice.

The brunette hadn’t even commented that Marinette had just sat in the last row one day. It could also have been because Alya’s voice was still bad because of the injuries but she liked to think Alya had just been happy about it. Knowing she had made Alya happy was at least something she could hold onto these days.

Everybody had seemed to cheer as Madame Bustier had announced that Marinette would no longer be the class representative. Marinette had come to her by the end of the week, pleading her to give her role to Chloé. Madame Bustier had been pretty happy about it as well, as she thought about it.

It seemed everyone was a little bit happier when a little part in her died.

So she played right in their hands.

She decided to dress in black now. It had started with a simple black shirt. Then some darker jeans. Now she wore only black, it was more plain, she would blend in with the crowd. She needed to. She even had her hair open, that way she could protect her face from curious or hurtful glances in her direction when she leaned forward.

First, the days had passed.

Now it was weeks. Soon it would be months, Marinette knew. Everyone seemed to pick their selves up, slowly recovering from the loss of Paris greatest hero. Chloé started to talk more again, so did Alya. The only one who seemed to be stuck in time was Adrien, as Marinette was too.

_No, no, bad Marinette. Don’t see the parallels. You’re different now,_ she scolded herself.

“Ms. Dupain-Cheng, would you honor us with your mental presence?”

Her head shot up but she still managed to glue her gaze on the edge of Nathaniel’s desk.

“Of course, Madame Mendeleiev. It won’t happen again.”, she blurted out, as quietly as she could possibly speak.

_That’s a very interesting edge of a table_ , she thought.

“Good. Then, what’s the solution for question 1.2?”

_Ouh god, the texture of the wood, it is so catchy!_

“I don’t know, Madame Mendeleiev.”, she whispered, not even bothering to pretend looking at her non-existing notes.

_A little used, the poor desk, but overall the edge is in very good shape._

“That’s it, Miss Dupain-Cheng. Get yourself together or I’ll give you extra homework and you’ll have to present it in front of the class tomorrow.”

_This wood, it is so mesmerizing, I can’t even- WHAT?!_

“Oh-uh-… The solution is 36?”

She heard Madame Mendeleiev snort, along with the rest of the class.

“And why would you think of this ridiculous number when the solution clearly is _not_ 36?”

Oh, she knew exactly why that number had popped up in her head.

“Because 36 days ago, I was blamed to have killed Paris’ greatest hero, and it haunts me every second, if you really wanna know so badly.”

The class went silent. Everyone looked down at their desks as Madame Mendeleiev made her way up to Marinette’s seat and came to a halt in front of the girl, glaring down at her while trembling of anger.

“If you can’t control yourself, leave. I will not tolerate these sudden outbursts of you in my lesson anymore.”

Without another word, Marinette took her notepad, let it slide into her bag, stood up and walked past her teacher. Dumbstruck, the older woman turned and her voice barked through the classroom just as the bluenette was next to Alya’s desk.

“What do you think you are doing, Miss Dupain-Cheng?!”

She stopped, blinking. Her fingers nervously fumbled with the two halves of the bracelet Alya had given her that day in the past.

“You said if I can’t control myself I should leave. So I’m following your advice. I’ll try to calm down and return as soon as I can.”, she muttered, again just so loudly that her teacher could barely hear her. Nobody answered so she continued her path past the desks and felt all the eyes of her class dig into her back as she left the classroom. As the door closed, a soft breeze brushed over to Nino, breaking his stare.

Everybody could hear the quiet, almost inaudible sob that escaped her lips when she had thought she was out of hearing range. Nino looked back at Alya, only to see her cold gaze fixed at the notes before her.

Slowly, Marinette was losing it and it became obvious to everyone.

 

* * *

 

Nothing.

Nino just couldn’t focus on his current remix.

What Marinette had done today was-… Unsettling, to say the least. Her mind couldn’t seem to take a break from this whole situation…

He sighed and leaned back, rubbing over his face. If she couldn’t he couldn’t either.

This was so messed up…

He could literally feel the hate bubbling inside his two friends. Neither Alya nor Adrien shot her any dirty looks or scowled at her like the rest of their classmates. But he knew Adrien had had a thing for Ladybug and he knew Alya had been looking up to her as a role model.

He sighed and bit his lower lip, shaking his head. Just nothing, nothing made sense. He didn’t know the girl that claimed to be Marinette anymore. He didn’t recognize her as the childhood friend she had been to him anymore. The little dark blue haired girl that he had spent almost every day of his younger years with. The girl he knew since her birth, the girl he had had a crush on a few years ago. She wasn’t the same anymore. The Marinette he knew wouldn’t have shut herself off like that. She would’ve never started acting like that. But on the other hand…

It was a bad situation at the moment. He knew she was losing it. He knew everything had gone wrong and he knew she’d lost everything she had. Her father ignored her since she’d hurt her mother and everyone else except Sabine and him had begun making her responsible for the hero’s death.

“Damnit…”, he swore, flicking his mouse over his desk. The cursor on the screen shot up and he sighed, “What did Marinette do to deserve this…?”

Nothing. Nobody answered him.

That was the answer. The answer was that it was unfair. Everyone was being unfair.

He growled.

He wouldn’t become unfair to her. He was her childhood friend. He would do everything in his might to protect her from her own former best friend and every other who made her responsible for Ladybug’s death instead of blaming Miss Fortune.

He knew her the longest out of everybody in the class and he was going to make sure she would be okay. He knew her differently than Adrien or Kim or Mylène.

Better. He knew her better. Even better than Alya knew her.

He couldn’t just stand and watch. He wouldn’t allow it.

Nino swiveled around on his chair and looked out of the window. A shadow dashed past and he hurried to his feet, pressing his cheek against the window to just see Chat Noir jumping away over the rooftops. In the distance he could see an explosion. Of course, another Akuma…

Hawkmoth really didn’t lay off on the poor cat themed superhero, he had just send an Akuma yesterday. Now that Chat Noir was alone it had apparently lifted the spirits of this man.

Nino sighed and put on his shoes to exit his family’s apartment, briefly waving his mother and throwing a quick goodbye in her direction. Alya would be out and about for sure, right after the Akuma to record it. He groaned.

She insisted on doing that, maybe to give the people hope that Chat Noir could still protect them? Or, well, catch the apocalypse on tape, that would be exciting. Nino huffed and walked faster down the street, towards the Akuma. He had always been the safe one, the one who fled when it was necessary, the one who kept himself safe. Alya had always been the one to run after the Akuma’s. But now that it had all become a little more dangerous he just couldn’t think about himself anymore.

Plus, he really liked Alya… Damnit. If she got hurt he’d blame himself.

So he buried his hands in his jeans as he entered a streetcar and slumped down on one seat, leaning his head back. At least Adrien always stayed out of this. And he also had never seen Marinette near the action. Two friends less to worry about. Or, well, one friend less.

There was still the thing with her and, well-… These accusations. He was surprised the police hadn’t done anything yet, honestly. Okay, she was an akumatized victim and there was a law against blaming them for anything but still, he had thought Chloé would find a way around that.

He was just glad Chloé wasn’t that cruel… Or at least not yet.

Maybe there was still hope?

He bit his lip as the explosions sounded closer now. He did not want to be here and certainly didn’t want to get even closer. What he didn’t do for that crazy girl…

His mind wandered back to Marinette as she entered the classroom this morning, looking worse every day. Her style had drastically changed, darker, making her fit in. She didn’t wear her original designs anymore. Her hair open and dark circles underneath her eyes.

Nino got off the streetcar and began jogging down the street to get to searching for Alya.

Marinette’s condition worried him more than Alya’s well-being during Akuma’s and Adrien’s growing sleep deprivation.

Hopefully he could somehow help her…

 

* * *

 

Before Alya could do anything against it, she already felt tears running down her cheeks again. It was lunch break and she sat alone at the edge of the school yard, her knees pulled close and her arms wrapped around her legs. She didn’t even know why she just burst out crying sometimes.

Was it that Ladybug was gone?

Was it that she somehow missed Marinette?

Or maybe that everyone had started acting weird?

She really didn’t know. There’s just a sudden, overwhelming sadness that’s taking over her, that’s forcing the tears out and sobs to form without a warning. She pressed her cheeks to her knees and watched the people chatting with each other, seemingly not bothered by anything. They could apparently forget what happened as soon as Marinette was out of their sight. Alya began sobbing as the mere name of her former best friend shot through her head, lowering her head so that her forehead rested now on her knees, her hair falling around her face like a curtain, shutting her off from the world. She hugged her knees tighter, wanting to just stop. Stop what?

She honestly didn’t know. Stop Hawkmoth? Stop the people from talking? Stop what?

She sobbed more violently when she found no answer.

Just the thought about stopping _something_ was already soothing but it helped nothing to dry her tears. She sniffled and cried and didn’t care at all that tears and snot fell on her jeans, soaking her thighs.

Suddenly, though, she felt a pair of arms wrapping around her. A warm body pressing against hers, sitting down next to her. A pair of legs sneaking underneath her legs and a head in her neck, short hair tickling her sensitive skin. Then another warm body, pressed up against her other side, legs wrapping around her and that other person, arms placed over the first pair and a second head at the other side of her neck, soft and silky hair soothing her.

She calmed down after a while, her sobs dying down and her tears drying. The boys next to her were keeping her warm and protected and she happily breathed in Nino’s mossy, soft scent and Adrien’s slight scent of cinnamon. She slumped a bit and let them hold her up, her breaths changing from quivery and uneven to relaxed and steady. She snuggled closer to them both, not noticing how Marinette entered the school, saw the pile of teenagers and turned around on her heel, walking straight back home, murmuring “Don’t wanna interrupt that” to herself.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hawkmoth takes a great advantage of the situation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In this chapter I wanted to display how Chat Noir is fighting against Akumas on his own.  
> As you may have noticed, the Akumas have become more frequently - mentioned in the last chapter - and a little more violent since Hawkmoth now sees an opportunity to get his hands on Chat Noir's Miraculous as well.  
> Have fun reading~

Henry giggled to himself as he shoved another handful up his tower. The sand was fluffy on the surface so he made sure to use sand from the bottom, the slightly damp sand, that wouldn’t fall apart so easily. His fourth tower was coming along really good. He had managed to get a better shape than on tower three. The little boy glanced up and shot the third tower a glare.

It just wouldn’t stay upright! He had to make it bigger than all the others and now it was just looking stupid…

But he concentrated back on the fourth tower, the one that hadn’t disappointed him. He already imagined the soldiers walking over the walls, protecting the sand form he had hidden in the middle. His little treasure. It was a scraped yellow plastic form that looked like a shell and he had buried it in his hill in the middle. The form was safely hidden and his soldiers would protect it quite well against any threats.

When he was finished patting on the walls of the tower he poked his finger in several times to create windows. His soldiers had to see everything.

He then sat back and proudly gazed upon his work.

It was his best sandcastle so far, for his long life of four years.

He laughed again as he gently pushed against a wall. It didn’t budge. His castle was perfect.

Henry turned to wave to his mother on a park bench with a few other mothers and tell her his castle was finished. Just as his gaze found her he heard a cackle from behind him. An older girl approached his castle just as he turned back to her. The girl looked like she was already in school.

Henry was scared. She didn’t look nice.

“What do you have there?”, she asked and he began to hope again.

“My sandcastle! I built it mysewf!”

She grinned evilly and lifted a foot, kicking against one of his towers. It broke and disintegrated so easily beneath her shoe. Henry felt tears welling up in his eyes.

“What awu doing?!”, he cried, “Stop that!”

The girl stomped down on another wall, then kicked against the hill and his treasure fell out. She had discovered the secret!

“It’s not very good!”, she laughed, “Better build a new one!”

Henry quickly grabbed the form and stood up, big tears now flowing down his cheeks.

“You aw a meanie!”, he screamed and ran out of the sand pit, not towards his mother but to the trees and bushes, sitting down there sobbing. He didn’t even notice the dark violet butterfly landing on the yellow form of a shell.

 

* * *

 

Adrien listened up as he heard a scream sounding outside. The class looked up from their worksheets and he felt fear creeping into their minds. A few already rose to their feet. Everytime he had fought an Akuma in the last month it had ended pretty destructively.

Without Ladybug, it became significantly harder and harder to fight against the Akumas plus he didn’t have the cleansing light. Everything stayed.

He sighed and got up as well as the teacher dismissed the class, advising them to either go home of as far away from the attack as they could. Alya pulled out her phone but looked kind of miserable.

She had continued filming the Akuma attacks since Ladybug’s death but after all, what was a Ladyblog without a Ladybug?

Adrien just hoped Nino would take care of her.

Without anyone noticing he slipped out along with the rest of the class and stepped to the side, then entered the same classroom again after making sure it was empty. Nobody had noticed him parting from the group of fleeing students and not leaving the school. He was sure Nino would realize shortly but he would just shrug it off. Adrien was never present at an Akuma attack.

Chat was.

Plagg flew out of his jacket and huffed.

“Another Akuma? For real?”

Adrien sighed and nodded.

“I think so, yeah.”

“Didn’t we fight one, like, just yesterday?”

The blonde rubbed over his tired eyes and nodded again.

“Yeah. I’ll buy you all the cheese in the world, now c’mon. _Plagg, claws out!_ ”

 

* * *

 

Chat Noir halted as he arrived at the scene and put his baton away.

This was-… Weird. The Akuma looked so small. Why was it so small?

He decided to keep himself hidden to study the Akuma first. So, he was really small and floated, apparently. He had to get him out of the air, then. He also hadn’t heard him talking or saw him do anything yet so he jumped closer, still staying hidden.

“I am Desew’ifier!”, the Akuma boomed in a pretty young voice, “I’ll destwoy evvything you’ve built! I want rewenge!”

Chat’s chest heaved up and down as he watched him touch a building, turning it into sand. The pile immediately fell in itself and turned into a big hill of dry, coarse sand. He could hear a few screams from the road and inside the building while it fell into itself before they were cut off abruptly when the sand collapsed. Chat didn’t think for too long. He waited as the Akuma turned his back and jumped from the roof, directly onto the pile of sand.

“Plagg, help me…”, he pleaded but he knew his Kwami couldn’t answer. So he closed his eyes and listened carefully. Luckily his transformation provided him with the ears of a cat, quite literally, so he was able to locate thirteen people in the sand. The ones on the surface were the first, he just had to stick his hand in and pull them out. The ones that were buried pretty deep were more difficult. He kept digging and digging until all thirteen were rescued, which took him about twenty minutes with a few close calls, then he looked down the street. A few people waved at him, standing next to destroyed houses, piles of sand blocking the street. He couldn’t pay attention to the Akuma right now. He had to save these people.

When he got to the third house the Akuma had disintegrated he found the first dead body. It hadn’t been the first in this month but it still distraught him.

He brushed the tears out of his eyes as he saw the family of the suffocated man breaking into tears, then he jumped away. He found three more on the second house. On the first house, almost everyone had died.

He gritted his teeth and jumped upon a rooftop to chase after the Akuma. With a sob building up in his throat he shoved away the image of Marinette. She was at fault for this. She did this.

He hunted down the Akuma while doing his best to free the people the Akuma had trapped underneath the large piles of sand. Then, finally, he spotted the Akuma again, about to touch another house. Oh no, he wouldn’t!

“Hey, sandman! Turn around!”

Just as the tiny Akuma turned Chat rammed his baton in his stomach. Desertifier went from floating to flying and hit the asphalt of the street. The hero jumped after him and held him down with his baton but then he stilled. The Akuma was a child, a kid no older than five or something. Chat stumbled back and gulped at the grin Desertifier shot him. He had fought against child-Akumas before. Manon, the daughter of Madame Chamack, a reporter, had been the first.

And Adrien had never been good with kids.

Of course, he loved them and he supposed he could keep them entertained when they were happy in the first place but-… He hadn’t had the chance to practice being good with kids when he had been locked away in his golden cage for most of his life. It had always been Ladybug who had been able to deal with them, who had been able to soothe them, too.

He knew she had been babysitting in her free time so she had known her way around with kids. Not just with happy ones as he did but also with sad, frustrated, angry or stubborn kids. He had always admired how she had managed to soothe them with a hug or some calming words.

How should he do this on his own?

He never fought a child Akuma alone!

He couldn’t fight it like a normal Akuma, like a teenager or an adult, he had to be careful.

Additionally, that kid used cataclysm!

He didn’t have that!

Okay, he did but he didn’t want to use it. The balance between the Ladybug and the black cat Miraculous was a very important thing and he didn’t want to throw it off. If Ladybug’s Miraculous couldn’t produce a Lucky Charm, wasn’t even activated at the moment, he didn’t want to use his cataclysm either. Plus-… Paris was being destroyed enough by the Akumas. If he added to that destruction with his own cataclysm, with no chance of repairing it after, he would be no better than them.

On the other hand, that Akuma used it without recharging, without mercy. His hand with the ring subconsciously clenched to a fist.

This was just a child and he used his form of cataclysm like it was natural. He probably wouldn’t even understand what he did if he watched himself right now, not akumatized. He was a little child and Chat didn’t know how to handle that.

That kid didn’t understand that he was killing people here.

Chat gulped a second time as Desertifier once again began floating.

“Chat Noa!”, he cackled, “Gimme your Miwaculous!”

The addressed hero shook his head and gritted his teeth.

“No! Hawkmoth, you’ll never have my Miraculous as well! Just give it up and I might not kill you!”

A pink outlining of a butterfly appeared around the young Akuma’s eyes and he furrowed his eyebrows, then nodded.

“But Haw’moth wants your Miwaculous! And Imma get it for him!”

As the Akuma lunged at Chat he could barely dodge the hit and jump out of the way. The hit that had been meant for him turned a few meters of the street around Desertifier’s hand to sand. Chat came to his feet again and raised his fists.

He was Paris’ very last defense.

Ladybug was dead and he had to stop the Akumas by himself, otherwise Hawkmoth would wreak havoc in the city. He had to stand his ground, no matter how scared or lost he was, he had to fight. So he began running around the Akuma, jumping on him from behind before he could react, toppling him over and restrained his hands to the ground. But he had underestimated the strength and anger of this child.

Desertifier spun and threw him off of his back, sending him slamming into a wall of a house. Chat rubbed the back of his head but immediately got up to his feet again as the Akuma tried to hit him. He managed to step to the side and grinned.

“You missed!”

Desertifier quickly floated back.

“Did not!”

Chat looked up too late. He barely acknowledged a wall of sand slamming into him, burying him underneath the heavy pile. He quickly forced his hands up to his face which was really, really straining to do since he was pretty much trapped, and managed to form a little bubble of air in front of his face. His strength as a superhero helped him massively but he knew there were a lot of people still trapped with him. Quickly, he spat in his hand and felt the spit running down one of his cheek.

The other way was up.

He began digging up desperately until his hand went free. Seconds later, he was free and already searching for the other victims, his baton lost somewhere in the sand. When he found everyone the Akuma had floated down the street a little further, watching amusedly. Chat briefly asked himself why he wasn’t doing anything but he didn’t question it further. Probably because he was a child and children loved watching something. The leather clad superhero growls as Desertifier threatened to bring down another building, smirking over to him.

He leapt and grabbed a foot of the Akuma, pulling him down to the street to get a better look at him, trying to find the akumatized object. Nothing appeared in his view and the little boy once again wriggled out of his grip and floated away from him.

“You’re alone, Chat Noa! You can’t win against me!”

Chat grumbled.

“You’re alone, too. Hawkmoth will do nothing but yell at you. So we’re even.”

The Akuma’s face fell momentarily but then he only got angrier.

“Not true! _You’re_ alone!”

The hero rolled his eyes and lunged at him but Desertifier directed a fist made of sand towards him and knocked him away.

He was flung into a building a few meters down the street and limply fell to the floor. He couldn’t do that without his lady… This was a child!

He couldn’t just-… Fight against him!

The Akuma lashed out for him once again yet Chat came to all four and managed to jump away. Luck would have it that he ran right into Alya. He caught her before she fell and straightened her up again.

“Alya, you have to get away from here! Where’s Ni-… Uh, that boy who’s always with you?”

She furrowed her eyebrows.

“Nino’s trying to catch up. But I have to re-”

Chat rolled his eyes but then stilled.

“Hey wait!”, he pulled her into an alleyway and threw a glance over his shoulder, checking if the Akuma was still busy with searching for him. He nodded and turned back to her, “Alya, camera on me.”

She gulped and lifted her phone, undoubtedly on livestream, to let him face the camera.

“Citizens of Paris, users of the Ladyblog. There’s an Akuma attack happening near the southside of the Seine, at the same height of the louvre. Every one of you, evacuate your homes and run. The houses are collapsing in sand and you’re not safe! Go to family or friends that live far enough away or public places until it’s over, spread the word, evacuate _immediately_! Do not enter buildings when the Akuma’s near, they do _not_ provide safety! He doesn’t attack people so you should be safe to run!”

He nodded to Alya and already turned again.

“Make sure to repeat the location of the Akuma and the message every five minutes and stay in a safe distance.”, with that he jumped off, knowing he couldn’t tell Alya to run away. She wouldn’t listen to him. So he at least could try and get a good use for her. He knew the Ladyblog was followed by thousands of people so maybe there was at least one in each building who saw the livestream.

And sure enough, as he faced Desertifier again the people began running out of the buildings and down the street, away from the fight. He nodded and huffed as the stream of people slowly faded. Looked like most of them were out. So he didn’t have to save citizens from the suffocating sand.

The Akuma growled and grew himself two big fists of sand.

“Gimme your Miwaculous!”

“You already said that!”, Chat yelled, “But you’re not gonna get it!”

The little boy lashed out at him but the hero did a roll to escape from the fist. He _had to_ attack as well. He would never win if he kept dodging.

But it was just a kid!

Tears began to build up in Chat’s eyes as he leapt into the air to escape yet another punch. Ladybug had always been with him… She would’ve known what to do.

With her, nobody would have died yet.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While the fight continues, two new players join the hero on the field.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I've gotten quite a few comments that have been asking for two things:  
> 1) Can I make it okay again?  
> 2) When is the next update?  
> Don't get me wrong, I love getting comments from you guys and everything around these two questions let me literally jump around! I just wanted to answer these two questions in general.  
> 1) Yes, I can. But it'll take a while. A long while. Very long while. I just love torturing you guys! >:D  
> 2) I'm updating after a schedule. Update every three days ;)  
> Have fun reading~

Alya gulped as she saw Chat Noir sprinting up a wall and doing a flip off the building to escape from the Akuma’s fists. He jumped over the street to come to his feet again but stumbled. It took a while for him to adjust and it was just a second too long. The Akuma slammed him against another wall and Chat winced from the pain.

Alya bit her lip and the Akuma picked him up and slammed him against the same wall.

Back then, Ladybug would’ve distracted the Akuma for Chat to come back on his feet. They would’ve flirted and bantered and the fights would be over relatively quickly since Ladybug couldn’t lose with her lucky charm.

The young reporter choked back a yelp as Chat tried to escape but was picked up once again and flung into another wall. He got back to his feet and swayed a bit, almost falling again. Ladybug would’ve put a hand on his shoulder, steadying him. Alya sighed.

It almost looked like Chat was trying to dance a duet as a solo.

It was heartbreaking to watch. Sure, it had gone on for a month now but Alya saw it like this the first time. Chat stumbled where he should’ve been caught, he was careless where he should’ve been held back, he was cornered where someone else should take over.

It had never been so present that Ladybug was missing.

Chat did his best, had done his best for a little over a month already, but it seemed he was struggling more and more. She gritted her teeth as she thought back to Marinette.

She had done this. She had done this over one stupid comment from Chloé and over one honest answer from her. She had-… She had killed Ladybug.

Alya groaned as Chat took another hit, then she turned the camera to herself again.

“Hey peeps, here’s Alya. You heard Chat Noir. I’ve got the task to repeat this every five minutes, listen closely. So, the Akuma doesn’t seem to attack people but houses. The houses disintegrate to sand and people are buried underneath it. You should be safe to flee. Do not stay in houses, they’re the danger here! Run away as far as you can from the Akuma, it’s on the southside of the Seine across from the louvre. Search for shelter at friends or family’s houses that are far enough away or on public places but do not enter buildings that are too close to the Akuma. Remember to stay safe, I’m counting on you! Leave all houses near the Akuma right n-”

“ALYA!”

She choked on thin air as she heard the cry. It sounded like-… She peered over her phone and saw Nino running towards her.

“Gosh Alya, I was so damn worried!”, he didn’t slow down in the slightest, instead he slammed against her and pulled her into a tight hug. She felt him trembling and wheezing from the run. But there was also something different in his voice.

“Nino, I’m-… I’m fine, I-… Chat Noir gave me a task, I have to tell the people to evacuate the houses immediately. The Akuma turns houses into sand and people have been buried underneath it. They have to get away from here, asap, or they’ll be in danger.”

Nino nodded slowly, then, still keeping her in his arms, he peeked around the edge. Chat Noir was cornered at the moment but he did his best to fight the little Akuma back. Their fight had merged into a merciless exchange of punches and hits, even though Chat looked like he might be sick. Maybe because he had to fight a child. Speaking of child!

Nino spotted a little girl running into one of the houses. She had apparently parted from her family who hadn’t noticed she was gone. It was the house to which Chat stood with his back. The Akuma could touch it at any moment. Nino didn’t consider it for long.

“Alya, you stay here!”

“What?! Why?!”

“There’s a little girl, she went back. I’ll get her. You stay here and continue warning the people.”

“Wh-What?! I’m coming with you!”

Nino shook his head and gently pushed her back.

“You stay here. I’ll come back, I promise.”

He was so tempted to kiss her right in that moment but he couldn’t be distracted. So he turned on his heels and sprinted over the street as fast as he could. Within seconds he was inside the building, his eyes slowly adjusting to the sudden shadow in contrary to the sun outside. He lunged up the stairs, calling for the little girl.

“Hey, it’s not safe here! Hey, little girl, come here, I’ll bring you out!”

He heard a quiet cry and ran up faster.  
“I’m here, c’mon, we have to get out of here!”, he finally reached the door where she kneeled, sobbing into her hands.

“I-I-I l-left S-Snuffles in th-th-there!”, she cried. He huffed and scooped her up to pat her back.

“Shh, it’s okay. Is Snuffles a cat or dog?”

She shook her head and clung to his neck.

“My plushie. M-Maman didn’t let me t-t-take her and n-now the door’s c-closed!”

He bit his lip. They had to get out of here immediately but on the other hand, he knew how important a plushie was for a child. Sometimes it meant life or death to them. So he groaned and let her down again to kick against the door handle. Another time and another time until it _finally_ budged and gave way. He was lucky it was a rather cheap door…

“Come on, we’ll get Snuffles!”, he shouted and scooped her up once again, “Where’s your plushie?”

She pointed at the door right across the front door and he rushed in, letting her down to grab her plushie. At that moment, the building shook. Chat Noir must’ve been slammed against it again. Nino winced at the force. The girl held up the plushie and smiled under tears.  
“That’s Snuffles!”

Nino nodded and forced a smile.

“That’s great! Now let’s go!”

Just as the girl took a step the building shook another time but it felt different. Nino lunged forward and grabbed the girl, curling up around her just as the floor beneath his Nikes and the ceiling above his head changed to sand.

“Deep breath and hold it!”, he yelled. Suddenly, everything was gone and they fell.

 

* * *

 

“NINO!! NINO!!”, Alya’s phone was long forgotten and dropped to the floor when Desertifier got ready to punch Chat one more time. He pulled his fist back and the cat themed superhero ducked away. Everything happened in slow motion as Alya reached out, meters away, wanting to somehow stop the Akuma. The little boy’s hand flew forward and Alya screamed as it connected with the wall. Chat jumped around the Akuma and slammed his arm around her waist, ripping her back along with him. The sand collapsed on top of the Akuma and buried him underneath. Alya fell on her back and hit her head on the asphalt, Chat Noir landing on top of her but she paid no mind to him. She immediately sat up to watch the sand moving onto the street.

No Nino.

No little girl.

No nothing.

She felt tears welling up in her eyes and pushed Chat aside, getting to her feet, repeating his name like a mantra.

“Nino… Nino…”

Chat stood up beside her, placing his hands on her shoulders since she began swaying.  
“Was he _in there_?!”

She nodded numbly and Chat dashed to the pile of sand. The sand moved to reveal the little Akuma but Chat just ran around him, completely fixated on getting his best friend out of there. He listened intensely, his cat ears flickering as he heard a quiet sob.

 

* * *

 

Nino had managed to completely curl up around the little girl and her plushie as well as taking the whole impact for her. He had barely stayed conscious but he forced himself to keep his mind together. The little girl sobbed against his chest in the complete darkness and he only pulled her tighter with one arm, then tried to move his other to create a bubble in front of his face. He just so brought his arm up against the weight of the sand and dug his way to his face. There he freed his face and kept his hand close to his mouth and nose since he didn’t have the strength for more.

“Hey, can you hear me?”, he asked against his hand and felt her make tiny movements with her head against his chest. She was just as trapped as he was, “Take my shirt and pull it around your face. You can breathe then.”

He choked on a little sand that made it past his hand but partly coughed it out and swallowed it down so he could still breathe. He felt movement at his shirt, the little girl must’ve succeeded at using his shirt as a filter. She shortly coughed but mostly because she still sobbed. He rubbed over her back as far as the sand allowed him to and sighed.

“Chat Noir is gonna get us out of here. Don’t worry. Continue breathing into my shirt. That’s it, stay calm.”

She nodded again, then her sobs subsided. Nino relaxed again and let himself slump as far as he could. The weight was bearable but he began having difficulties with breathing.  
“… Are you an angel?”, she suddenly asked. He couldn’t fight a blush and a grin.

“Maybe. I might be your guardian angel. Did I do a good job?”

She sniffled.

“Yeah… Thank you for getting Snuffles for me.”

Nino chuckled quietly, his legs twitching in the uncomfortable position he was trapped in.

“Wrong, you got him. I just opened the door. That’s what guardian angels do, we help. You do the important stuff.”

The little girl giggled at that and Nino couldn’t fight a grin spreading on his lips, despite the situation.

“Then what’s your name, guardian angel?”

He coughed briefly but smiled.

“I’m Nino.”

“I’m Ailea!”

Nino hummed.

“What a beautiful name. I like it.”

She pulled a little on his shirt, then settled down again and snuggled closer against him.

“Why aren’t you blonde?”

“Hm? What?”

“All angels are blonde. Why aren’t you blond? And why is your skin brown? I thought all angels were pale.”

Nino smirked at that.

“Not all angels are blonde and pale. That’d be unfair. That would be as if Chinese angels weren’t Chinese but European. There are all sorts of angels. And I’m a brown one. With dark hair.”  
The girl kept silent for a little bit, then she nodded ever so slightly against the sand.

“… I like it.”

 

* * *

 

Chat Noir manically dug from where the sounds came. It sounded like Nino and a younger voice. It had to be them but they were really deep down. He kept digging, not noticing the Akuma coming up behind him.

Alya jumped without even thinking it through. All she knew was that Chat had to keep digging. Digging for Nino, to save his life. She wrapped her arm around the Akuma’s neck and pulled him down to the sand since she was heavier than the little boy.

“Don’t you dare!”

“Hey! Lemme go!”, Desertifier cried, trying to shake her off but she moved out of the way. Suddenly she left too much room for him to jab her in the ribs and she coughed. He pushed her away from him and sent her flying until she hit the asphalt and, thinking quickly, did a few rolls to lessen the impact. She came to her feet and noted two things, one bad and one good.

Good: She had successfully distracted the Akuma from Chat.

Bad: He was now after her. Shit.

She did the first thing that came to her mind and sidestepped to escape a blow with a fist made of sand. Then she ran. The Akuma followed her hot on her heels and she only came a few meters far before he managed to throw her off balance with a blow of sand. She crawled back and fearfully looked up to Desertifier but a relieved yelp made them both look up.

Chat!

A pink outline of a butterfly mask appeared around the Akuma’s eyes and he spun on the spot, dashing back to the superhero.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another victorious fight - at least for the rest of Paris. For Adrien the Akumas are starting to take their toll on him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, so I noticed I got quite a few comments asking me a few things or pointing out something that didn't make sense to them.  
> If you have any questions, please feel free to ask, I'll always be happy to answer! :)  
> You can contact me here over the comments, on FF.net over the reviews or you can write an ask or pm me over tumblr under awesomefreckledjesus.  
> I always love to explain what my thoughts on some characterizations were or why I wrote the story going in a certain direction.  
> And don't be afraid, you can ask me anything but I won't spoil so feel free, please! ;)  
> Enjoy~

Nino spluttered and coughed as he felt the sand moving above him. His face was apparently turned to the sky since he felt it getting lighter there. Someone was digging for them.

“That’s Chat Noir. He’s gonna get us out!”

Ailea held on tighter and her breaths shortened.

“I w-wanna get out.”, she cried.

“We will!”, Nino nodded, “We will get out!”

The sand became lighter and lighter around them until Nino already heard the labored huffs from the hero. He was out of breath but kept digging. Nino could already see light through his closed eyelids, then something slashed across his forehead.

“Ouch!”

Chat Noir became softer while digging and grabbed Nino’s wrist.

“Keep your mouth shut.”, he instructed and then pulled on Nino’s arm. Both him and the little girl were pulled out of their suffocating prison and Chat gently patted away the sand from them.

“I’m sorry I injured you with my claw. I’m really sorry…”, he tried but Nino cut him off after he could finally open his eyes again.

“Hey, it’s okay man. But you gotta fight that Akuma, we’re both fine.”

Chat turned just in time to push Nino and Ailea out of the way and duck away from the punch. The Akuma tumbled past them and Chat immediately chased after him, looking really angry by now.

Something wet suddenly blurred Nino’s view and he quickly closed one eye as the thick blood dropped into his eye. The little girl pulled him down the pile of sand to asphalt and made him kneel down.

“You’re bleeding!”, she exclaimed, quickly searching for something she could press on it but before she could find something warm hands cupped his head and pressed a cloth to his forehead that smelled really good. He sighed in relief as he heard the angry voice of his friend booming and her worried face appearing next to Ailea’s.

“Nino! You moron! You could’ve died!”

“Careful, Alya.”, he chuckled, “There’s a kid.”

She sighed and pressed a kiss to his forehead where her shirt left a little room, then pulled him into a tight hug. He could feel her trembling in his arms and buried his face in the crook of her neck as well as he could since Alya still pressed the shirt to his forehead.

“I don’t care. She can know you’re a moron.”

Nino sighed and hugged her tighter, rubbing over her back and taking over holding the fabric to his wound so that she could relax a bit. She immediately slumped in his embrace and he felt something wet dropping into his neck.

“I could’ve lost you…”, she whispered and he bit his lip, squinting his eyes close.

“I’m here, Alya. Don’t worry. I’m fine.”

She let out a small whimper and he felt her fingers clench into his shirt, desperately holding on to him. But just as he wanted to soothe her a little more Ailea decided to speak up, taking Nino’s hand. She was not quite agreeing to Alya’s way of addressing him.

“No, he’s an angel! He’s my guardian angel and he’s brown!”

Alya pulled back and looked slightly confused at first but then grinned and cupped her little soft cheek that was still covered in a few grains of sand.

“That he is… That he is.”, she murmured while pulling the little girl towards her into a light hug. She then took the little girl by her hand, telling her Nino had to rest now and she would bring her back to her family. Just when they had taken a few steps Nino could already see the mother running towards them. She must’ve noticed her daughter had been missing. Alya pointed towards him and he gave her a shy wave. The woman ran to him and hugged him tightly.

“You saved my daughter! You saved my little girl! You’re a hero!”, she cried and Nino patted her back.  
“It’s alright. Everyone would’ve done that. It’s okay.”

She thoroughly thanked him before offering him that whenever he needed something he could come to them to ask. Nino politely declined and bit down his tears. That woman had just lost her home.

She had just lost everything she owned, irretrievable, and yet she had offered him to do something for him.

He swallowed hard as he watched her reunite with her family and begin to hurry down the street to safety. Alya nudged his shoulder and urged him to stand up.

“The fight’s still going, Nino. We gotta get-…”

“… Outta here?”, he hopefully concluded but she shook her head.

“No, you need to get out of here. I’ll stay and record, plus Chat Noir counts on me. He told me to warn the people and I need the Akuma’s position for that.”

Nino stood up next to her and huffed.

“I’m staying with you. I can get this treated after Chat defeated the Akuma. Someone has to keep _you_ safe, too.”, she answered with a light slap on his shoulder but he just chuckled.

“C’mon, let’s get you to a good _and_ safe spot.”

 

* * *

 

Chat growled as the Akuma once again lashed out at him.

“Why can’t you just give up?!”, he cried out in annoyance.

“Becawse-”

“Oh save it! I don’t wanna hear it! Just where is your damn akumatized object?!”, Chat groaned while he dodged a kick directed at his head. He jumped back a few steps, then he eyed Desertifier who floated towards him again. Just before he lashed out at him, Chat finally spotted the one thing that didn’t seem to fit into the costume. It was a yellow sand form, just on the boy’s fist. The other hand didn’t have that.

He smirked and lunged forward. The fight had gone on for long enough now. There had been deaths.

It was enough.

Chat slammed the little boy to the ground, ripping the yellow shell from his hand. With a quick snap it broke in two halves and a dark butterfly fluttered out. Chat unhooked his bell from his zipper and threw it at the hurriedly fluttering butterfly, capturing it. His bell turned silver and he picked it up to put it back to his collar, then held his hand out and concentrated. The baton was underneath a pile of sand nearby, the one in which he had been trapped, not too deep down. He retrieved it and flicked his bell, a sad expression on his face.

“Miraculous Ladybug…”, he whispered to himself, sighing when he walked over to the Akuma. The little boy transformed back just as he kneeled down.

“Hey buddy…”, he tried softly, “How you doing?”

Henry looked up out of bleary eyes, obviously exhausted.

“Maman?”

“No, buddy, I’m Chat Noir. You were akumatized but you’re not anymore. Are you okay?”

The boy let himself fall back to sit up and blinked up at the superhero.

“Chat Noa?”

He hummed and carefully, slowly stretched out his hands, not wanting to scare the kid.

“Yeah. Wanna go to your Maman?”

He nodded and reached out to the older boy, then Chat scooped him up and instinctively brought one arm underneath the boy’s body to hold him securely.

“Hold on tight. Where’s your Maman?”

“W-We were in the pawk… Back there… I was pwaying in the sand.”

The blonde nodded and held him tight while jumping up to run over the rooftops. It was way easier than climbing over all those sand piles.

“You’re tired now, huh?”, the little boy nodded and sniffled, “Hey, it’s okay, I got you. What’s your name?”

“Henwy…”, he murmured.

“Good, Henry. You’re a strong one, huh? C’mon, let’s find your Maman.”, he touched down in the park near the sand pit and looked around.

“Do you see her here somewhere?”

The little boy leant away from him to glance over the crowd and suddenly lit up, making grabby hands into another direction.

“Yeah! By the bench there! There she is!”

Chat jogged to the bench where he saw a woman crying into her hands.  
“I am sorry, Mademoiselle, but is that your son?”

The woman looked up and immediately stood up, taking Henry into her arms and cuddling the toddler close.

“Oh thank you, Chat Noir! I was so, so worried when the attack started and I couldn’t find Henry anymore! What happened?”

The superhero rubbed the back of his neck.

“Your son was akumatized. He’s very exhausted. Take him home and get him a good rest, he needs this.”

The woman looked dumbstruck but nodded and hugged Chat Noir as well, then hurried into another direction. Chat sighed and waved after Henry before he grabbed his baton and took off, seeing if he could find Alya and Nino somewhere.

 

* * *

 

He found them one street away from all the sand piles, huddled together and treating Nino’s wound. Chat swallowed thickly before he let himself down to them with the help of his baton.

“Hey guys… Nino, I’m so sorry I hurt you…”

They both just smiled and his best friend shook his head.

“No, it’s alright. After all you saved my life, man. How could I be mad at you?”

“Well, I have no problem being mad at _you_.”, Alya murmured, nudging Nino’s shoulder. The boy grinned briefly.

“I know, but you would’ve done the same. I’m glad I saw her before you did.”

Alya grumbled and Chat snorted.

“Just don’t do it next time again, Nino. You gave me the scare of my life.”, the hero replied, earning an agreeing glance from her and a smirk from his best friend.

The girl suddenly perked up.

“Have there been casualties?”

Chat’s shoulders slumped and he put the baton back on its place before sitting down with them. The bodies he found crept back into his mind and he shivered.

“Yeah. A few. I managed to save the majority but the rest is-… Gone. I don’t know yet how many.”

“This is all Marinette’s fault.”, Alya spat and Chat flinched. Of course it was her fault but he had also seen the broken girl sitting in her class. Connecting her to these deaths made it even worse.

“Alya, take that back. This is not Marinette’s fault, it’s Miss Fortunes. I don’t care how often I have to say that until everyone understands and stops treating her like a murderer.”, Nino snapped.

His friends had a little silent fight about who was right but the boy didn’t step down. In the end, it was Alya who was the first to release her breath and look away.

“We’ve been over this too often.”, she mumbled and Nino nodded.

“Yeah. C’mon, Al, I’ll bring you home. You need help with cutting the footage?”

She nodded and stood up, then held out a hand to Chat Noir. He was surprised but took her hand and let himself be lifted to his feet.

“Uh-… Thanks.”

She smiled as a reply and the warmth she emitted was enough for him to momentarily forget his pain and exhaustion.

“You look tired, Chat Noir. Do you live far from here?”

He furrowed his eyebrows, always careful to spit out information about his civilian life around the nosy reporter but she merely rolled her eyes.

“Come on, I’m worried you might not make it. I can ask my parents if they can drive you. Or we could walk you home but I don’t trust you to jump over the rooftops right now. That you did it with the little child was reckless enough.”

Nino had to shoot him a sympathetic grin at that. Alya really could act like a mother if she wanted to. She must’ve picked that up when babysitting her little sisters. He had experienced that quite a few times when she and Marinette had still been friends.

“A walk home is too risky. You could find out who I am.”, he winked and grabbed his baton again, “But don’t worry, I don’t live too far from here. I’ll be fine.”

 

* * *

 

He barely made it home.

When he finally flopped down on his bed after letting the Akuma out and trapping it inside a jam jar he released the transformation. He felt like a crash test puppet, everything hurt and his eyes threatened to close any second. Plagg fell down next to him on his sheets and groaned.

“Sorry, buddy…”, Adrien murmured and reached to his nightstand to produce a wheel of camembert, handing it to Plagg.

“Kid, that was a strong one…”, the Kwami groaned, then propped himself up, glancing over at his chosen angrily, “Just why won’t you use your cataclysm?!”

Adrien huffed.

“You should know best about that. Balance, key Miraculous, Ladybug deactivated, et cetera.”

Plagg shoved a whole piece of cheese into his mouth and gulped it down without even chewing.

“And I told you that it’s fine. It’s not optimal but it’s okay to use cataclysm.”, the blonde turned his head away and the Kwami sighed, “It’s not just about the balance, isn’t it?”

He sniffled and brought his hand up to his face, inspecting the silver ring on his finger.

“It partly is. But-… I feel like I can’t destroy any more. The Akumas are destroying enough as it is, I don’t need to destroy anymore. And it, well, it feels wrong. Without Ladybug I don’t really feel like a superhero anymore. It would feel wrong to use my superpower when she’s not around to fix it.”

The Kwami shuffled closer and bopped his head against Adrien’s neck.

“I know, kid… I know…”

 

* * *

 

The next day in lunchbreak Alya dropped her books down next to Adrien’s head on the table. He immediately shot up and blinked confusedly, his bleary eyes barely focusing on her.

“Wh-Wha…?”, he drawled and yawned.

The brunette just sat down next to him and began spreading her books on the table.

“Wha’re you doin’?”, he warily asked, rubbing his eyes.

“Beginning to study.”, she replied. He nodded and laid his head back down to doze a bit more but she nudged his shoulder, “Hey, bananaboy, you don’t look too good. Pretty tired, to be honest. What’s going on?”

He just sighed and sat up straighter, rubbing over his face to stay awake now that he probably wouldn’t get some rest anymore. Sometimes he really envied the Kwami in his bag who was able to sleep the entire day until he was needed. Of course Plagg wasn’t as exhausted as Adrien…

But he had to give it to his friend, he had stopped whining around since Ladybug had died.

“Just tired…”

“Awake enough to help me?”

He sighed and managed a smile, scooting closer to her to be able to look over the exercises she had to do.

“Yeah, of course. Help with what?”

Alya groaned and let her head flop into her hands.

“Math, such a pain. You’re good in this. Did you already do the homework and can I just copy?”

Adrien laughed and shook his head at her request.

“Not a chance, Alya. You’re gonna do this on your own, you gotta know this for our exams next year.”

The brunette just huffed and began solving the easier tasks first, occasionally asking a question but otherwise managing on her own.

“Where’s Nino?”, the blonde asked.

“He went home. His lessons for today are over.”

Adrien groaned.

“Blasted Tuesdays…”, he muttered, “That lucky guy.”

“True.”, Alya laughed, “But hey, your Wednesday is just as sweet so don’t you whine around here.”

The boy merely shrugged at that, deciding not to begin with his busy schedule and his duties as the lone superhero of Paris. Since Ladybug was gone Adrien had to do the double of the work and additionally to all the Akuma’s Hawkmoth suddenly sent he had to keep normal criminals who felt save now that only Chat Noir remained from rampaging the city. So his days were filled with school, fencing, Chinese, piano lessons, basketball and the ridiculously high probability of an Akuma attack while his nights were keeping him busy with homework and patrols. He lived on-… Maybe two hours of sleep? Three when he got lucky.

“Hey, Adrien, need your help here. What’s that supposed to mean?”

Adrien looked over the exercise and pointed out with what she should begin but she just continued looking at him.

“Okay, here, you have to think back to curve sketching, okay? You gotta take this equation here and then do three derivatives of that and then you gotta-”

“I know what I gotta do.”

He scrunched together his eyebrows and shrugged.

“Well and why are you-”

“What is up with you?”, she interrupted him a second time. He slumped and leant back, his head hanging low.

“I’m just really tired… It’s been really much lately. With-… With Ladybug gone and all.”

Alya nodded and started calculating the derivations of the equation.

“Yeah, I feel you… So, what do I do now?”

“You set the equation equal to zero and solve that, then you have the point of intersection with the x-axis. Then you continue doing that with the other derivatives and you get the maximal turning point and minimal turning point of the graphs as well as the inflection point and you can plug your solutions in the next smaller derivation and thus find out if they’re maximal or minimal turning points or which inflection points you got.”

Alya nodded and got to work while Adrien leant back and watched her, sighing quietly. He couldn’t distract himself from the situation he was in.

Hawkmoth had sent out so many Akumas, keeping Adrien on the run the entire time. He knew, of course, what he planned. Wearing him out so he could take his Miraculous as well.

Adrien sighed and unconsciously clenched his fist around his ring. He would never, ever get his Miraculous. That Ladybug was gone had maybe broken him but it never had broken his will to defend the citizens of Paris. To stand between this maniac and innocent people.

Hell, he wouldn’t even push Marinette towards him if he ever requested to take her.

He had the duty and he owed Ladybug to keep the citizens of Paris safe. He was the last standing hero to stop Hawkmoth. And he wouldn’t let anyone down.

Still…

It occurred to him that Hawkmoth didn’t constantly send out Akumas. Before, the breaks had been bigger. Maybe because it hadn’t been Hawkmoth’s sole focus, because he hadn’t even had the chance of getting just one Miraculous. Because Ladybug and him had been an unstoppable team. Back then, Akumas occurred every two weeks, maybe some periods weekly. Not that much more. But ever since his partner had died Hawkmoth seemingly had raised his hope.

“Hey Agreste, snap out of it.”, Alya’s demanding voice let him flinch.

“Wh-What’s up?”, he tried but merely received a huff.

“I said help me with this problem.”

“Oh, alright. What is it about?”, he leant towards her and peeked over her shoulder to read in her textbook.

“Too close, Agreste.”, she suddenly said. Adrien slid a bit away, settling down next to her, their shoulders grazing.

“Better?”, he mumbled.

“Yeah.”, she murmured back and he shot her a short glance.

“You okay?”

She nodded and intently stared at her paper on which the both equations were scribbled down in her fast, a little cursive handwriting, “Yeah, just fine. Now, what do you say, professor, how do I solve this?”

“That’s a little more complicated.”, Adrien began and she already rolled her eyes and groaned, “Hey, c’mon, not _that_ complicated.”

She patiently listened to his explanation and nodded occasionally, then she bent over her paper again.  
“So now I gotta-… Wait, so here has to be a zero and I gotta use the pq-formula, then?”

“Yeah, to find out the three points of intersection with the x-axis.”

She nodded and concentrated on solving the problem again so Adrien sighed and placed his head on the table. He soon felt a gentle hand running up and down his back and he glanced up, seeing Alya still chewing on her pen to solve the problem and not looking over to him but offering silent support. Just what he needed.

He smiled to himself and turned his head to his arms again, dozing a little until Alya had to wake him up because lunch break was over.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Marinette now tries a different technique to cope with her past.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is one of the chapters that I'd like to put a warning before.  
> Marinette is doing something here that's not legal in most countries. She is still underaged in this chapter and while in France there's no drinking age - meaning it's not illegal for her to drink these things in france - it's still not an example on how to deal with these things. If you need help, please do not grab the bottle but go talk to somebody you trust.  
> This here is an entirely fictional story and, because of scenes like that, set on the rating Mature. Read on your own responsibility.  
> Sorry for these serious tones but this is a serious topic and what Marinette's doing is in no way exemplary.  
> But now, enjoy~

It was almost one and a half months, a week after the Desertifier incident, as Marinette tried the pain killers for the first time. She had waited until her parents had been asleep when she had crept down to the cupboard in the back of the bakery. She knew, there her parents kept the alcohol. The girl had heard many stories about forgetting when it came to alcohol.

Oh, and _boy_ how she wanted to forget.

She grabbed a bottle from the back, digging through the bottlenecks, until she found one at the very back of the cupboard. Carefully she pulled it out and found it was still untouched and dusty.

So her parents hadn’t even looked at it for presumably a very long time.

She crept outside into the relatively cold night, walking down the street. Quickly, she found a little alley and hid behind a few trash pins. A little breeze accompanied her on the floor when she sat down. As if to ask for help, she rubbed over the long since faded colors of her bracelet. The bracelet Alya had made for her.

The first sip of the bitter liquid made her shudder. It tasted horrible.

Marinette tried yet another one and still grimaced.

She hadn’t even looked at the tag, which probably said something like “The-most-horrible-drink-you’ve-ever-tasted”, but honestly, she didn’t care. It could’ve been Vodka, or maybe Whiskey or something. Something with a high percentage of alcohol, that’s for sure.

She found it easier to drink this horrible stuff the more she tried to just gulp it down instead of trying to taste it. She still couldn’t understand why adults actually wanted to buy and drink this stuff.

The girl was slightly frustrated that she didn’t feel anything yet although she had gulped down just about a quarter of the bottle now. So she continued drinking.

After half an hour the effect finally set in. She’d had about half of the bottle now and as she felt the dizziness coming and the carelessness set in, she smiled.

Finally, she understood what adults found in drinking. It was a horrible but also relieving feeling. Somehow she suddenly found that it hadn’t had that much of an importance anymore that she’d killed Ladybug. Of course, she did, but it didn’t feel as horrible anymore. Slowly she forgot how everyone looked at her and that she actually was Ladybug and certainly not yet dead.

She’d killed Ladybug. So?

The hero was dead, so what? Nobody should care anymore. Because she wasn’t here anymore. Out of your sight, out of your worries, right?

Marinette smiled, sliding down the wall a little more. She felt wonderful. Careless. Something she hadn’t been for months. Her face felt relaxed and numb, not constantly stressed. Her body was slumped, something that didn’t even happen in her sleep since then.

She’d had sore muscles some days after the incident, because she had slept so bad lately.

The bluenette thought about her ‘friends’, the same who had given up on her because of a simple lie not even she herself had told. And there was another thing about alcohol.

She was way more emotional, something she had hidden since that fateful day that had destroyed her life. So she started crying. After a few minutes, she was curled up into a ball, sobbing violently. For months now she had forbidden herself to show any emotions anymore because she’d learned it upset people. When she was sad, everyone would mock her, because they thought she was a heartless murderer. When she was happy, everyone would pick at her, because she wasn’t allowed to be happy anymore for she killed Paris greatest hero. When she was melancholic, depressed, determined, thrilled, angry, chilled, scared… It was the same result all over again.

Every time, every single time she didn’t imitate an emotionless robot, she was bullied. And now, she finally allowed herself to show her emotions again, openly, for the first time in an eternity.

Her friends had ditched her, her father was ignoring her, Tikki was in the wrong hands and it was her fault, her former crush hated her, the whole world judged her and Miss Fortune seemed to laugh at her weakness. The only two people who at least exchanged a few words with her were her mother who tried to get to her and help her – without success – and Nino, who pitied and tried to protect her from the people who hated her now – no triumph either.

She was a failure, even to the people who still tried to find the Marinette that had died along with Ladybug that day.

After a few minutes of crying however, the alcohol kicked in completely.

She thanked god she didn’t leave the little alley while she was drunk. Because after she had felt that the drug was now completely taking over her, she had little to no memory of what had happened after that. She remembered she had wanted to stand up but failed. She remembered herself suddenly standing regardless, trying to take a few steps but found herself being unable to. She had fallen to the ground immediately after trying to remove her hand from the wall. She recalled hysterically laughing and crying at the same time because she’d seen a black cat that had strolled through the alley and sniffed on her before fleeing. The rest was a black pit, swallowing her.

She woke up at three in the morning, throwing up violently. She managed to spare the ground and vomit into a trash bin. Finally, she was feeling better. Or at least, her head was clearer after emptying her stomach. Actually, she felt worse.

_So, that’s what a hangover feels like_ , she thought.

She’d heard many stories about that, from Kim when he tried to impress his fellow students again, from her parents who told her stories of their wedding or some birthdays, laughing along with her or from eavesdropping at older students with Alya when she was crushing on one of them again, giggling at the dumb things they’d done while being drunk. They’d laughed about drinking too much, about the silly stories they’d been told by their friends afterwards when they couldn’t remember them, about the massive hangover they’d received as a punishment for their actions.

She remembered laughing at them with Alya, wondering how bad it could actually be, because it only was something to drink – right?

Turns out it was horrible.

It was much more horrible than she’d heard how it had been in the stories. It almost killed her, that’s how much her head and stomach ached right now.

She picked herself up from the ground, grabbing the bottle that somehow hadn’t shattered when she’d thrown it across the alley. However, that’s what her blurry memory told her. She also could’ve rolled it around on the floor, much like herself, but that was something that would forever be lost in the dark that clouded her mind.

She lurched back home, stumbling and constantly falling over because she had completely lost her sense of balance to this devilish liquid that happily bounced around in the bottle she carried.

She began to hate and love this stuff.

Loved it because it made her forget things so easily and made her careless, hated it because it made her feel even more miserable than she’d felt before anyways.

She arrived at home, assuming that if she fell asleep now she’d not wake up anymore for a presumably very long time. So she went into her room, waiting silently until her parents got up, starting to work in the bakery. She showered as they were downstairs already, dressing herself and putting on a lot of deodorant and perfume, brushing her teeth for at least half an hour.

She felt less horrible afterwards but the sleep deprivation and the hangover were still there, probably trying to kill her. After covering up the dark circles under her eyes with lots of make-up, she almost seemed normal on the outside, except for the sleepy and completely broken face she made.

She tried to smile and her reflection in the mirror grimaced.

She grimaced back and almost jumped at the murderous face the mirror showed her.

Shaking her head, she retreated from the bath, trying not to think of her making that expression while Miss Fortune had choked Alya. While going downstairs she still felt the alcohol in her blood. Silently she thanked her past-self for being so thoughtful and hiding the bottle in her room and not trying to put it back into the cupboard. She probably wouldn’t have been able to put it at the very back behind all the other bottles without throwing a few of them to the ground, smashing them in the progress.

Marinette ate something and then went up into her room again, as slowly as she could. With a glance at her clock she groaned. It was still five in the morning and school wouldn’t start for at least three hours and forty-five minutes.

She slumped on her seat, leaning back. Just because she had nothing to do she flipped through her diary. The bluenette hadn’t written an entry for it again after she was accused of murder.

She had documented every single adventure as Ladybug, fighting against Akumas, going on patrols with Chat… Marinette sighed. A small tear fled from her eyes and down her cheek. Furiously she brushed it away, tossing the diary back into its box, closing it. She couldn’t let it get to her.

Chat had been taking care of the Akumas since Marinette didn’t have the Miraculous anymore. Turns out he could capture the dark butterflies inside his bell and contain them there.

The girl didn’t know what Chat was doing with them afterwards but as soon as he captured an Akuma, his bell would turn silver. The next he showed up for another Akuma attack, his bell was golden again.

She knew he couldn’t cleanse them, that was her ability, so she assumed he held them captive otherwise. Marinette imagined he just released them to store them somewhere. Because, obviously, the butterflies could just be killed and it would have the same effect, but she knew Chat couldn’t harm a little bug.

Or his bell had some kind of destroying effect, much like his powers. After all, she – Ladybug – could cleanse them, so why not him being able to destroy them somehow?

She shrugged, going upstairs to get a bit of fresh air before school. The balcony was quiet and a cold breeze brushed through her hair as she emerged from her hatch above her bed. The streets still were relatively quiet, for Paris anyways. She glanced over to her school finding it dark and not buzzing with life as she normally knew it. There she wouldn’t have to be on guard if her mother decided to get through to her or her father judged her with his hurtful glances again.

After an hour of just waiting and letting her thoughts wander around she got up, slowly packing her things, deciding to arrive at the school two hours early.

She got something to eat with her in case she got hungry and emerged from the house, avoiding her parents, trotting to the school. The classrooms still were locked, so she sat in front of hers and pulled her knees up to her chin. The girl had written a note in case her mother thought she had killed herself or something, saying she just went to go on a short walk until school would start.

Honestly, she’d thought about it once in a while, more often than she wanted to admit to herself. About killing herself, that is.

But she knew it wouldn’t have been the right thing to do.

She still was Ladybug and she still had the duty to protect the citizens of Paris.

Marinette knew she just had to hold on and believe there was a way, she just had to find it. She even went to see Hawkmoth’s lair again and somehow, she’d found it, but she knew she couldn’t just barge in. She’d spied on it and saw Hawkmoth in there almost every evening, but never noticed him or any other enter or leave the building. She assumed there had to be a secret passage that allowed him to get in there without anyone knowing of it. Of course, she’d thought, almost face palming. He was a supervillain, of course he knew what he was doing. She just asked herself where he had gotten the money from to have such a lair… Or did he just go there because nobody else used it?

So she let go of that. If only she could talk to Chat Noir. He could help her get in and rescue Tikki. Then, the two of them would be able to take down Hawkmoth, reveal his identity and get him arrested for his crimes.

On her own she had no chance. So all she could do was try to get comfortable while waiting for Chat. Hopefully, he would come around someday. She was sure he didn’t want anything to do with her but maybe he would want to come and kill her? As murderer of his lady?

Maybe when they were older and not so innocent anymore?

She huffed and almost gave into a laugh but stifled it. Even if nobody was around she would have to be careful with showing her emotions. It could take over her and she would not be able to stop herself, which would lead to picking on her and punches later on, if she really wasn’t able to stop herself anymore.

However, she still could laugh about how her only hope depended on whether someone was willing to kill her or not. She would just have to wait.

 

* * *

 

One and a half hours later, half an hour before school would start, the first students began to arrive. Slowly, the school filled with laughter and yawns, chatting students and sleepy faces. Marinette still sat on the wall, letting her hair fall freely over her shoulders and her pony veil her face. She could still see, through the loose strains, but nobody could make out her eyes in return. Additionally, she’d brought a cap with her, now putting it on her head so that nobody would try to ask questions.

Soon, Max arrived as the first. He acknowledged her presence and stood on the other side of the door, facing away from her. She knew it like this.

Everyone would always ignore her. Or bully her, either way. Though she liked ignoring better.

She looked to the ground through her knees, only looking up as more students arrived. Juleka with Rose, then Alix and Kim, mocking each other, laughing. They stopped, however, as they saw Marinette already sitting there, Kim shrugged and walked over to her to get to Max, obviously kicking her legs.

“Ooops, didn’t see you there, dumbass.”, he stated, laughing as he stood next to Max.

“Feelings mutual, Kim.”, she muttered under her breath, bringing her legs closer to her body. Her stomach ached and she knew it was because of the alcohol. Alya and Nino climbed up the stairs, Nino rubbing a hand over Alyas back as she saw Marinette slumped against the wall.

The bluenette liked to think it were feelings of guilt that made Alya react like that whenever she saw Marinette at some of her worst moments, like looking as if she was homeless, but she knew better. And then, Chloé decided to do something funny.

She had a coffee-to-go with her, assumingly as hot as boiling water. Marinette saw it coming, of course. Yet she didn’t move one little bit.

Chloé snickered as she walked up to the dark-haired girl, swaying her hips while doing so. Adrien came up the stairs and watched, as Chloé looked around to be sure she had the attention of everybody in the class. She came to a halt next to the girl on the floor, smiling wickedly, Sabrina close on her heels.

“Let’s see if that wakes her up, shall we?”

Nino reached out and wanted to step between the two but Chloé had removed the lid of her coffee already. Sabrina took Marinette’s cap to make sure it would hit her with everything Chloé got.

“Chloé, stop, don’t-”

The blondes hand tilted and the whole cup of hot coffee spilled down at Marinette, hitting her right on the head.

The pain was almost unbearable. Stinging, the coffee made its way down her hair, burning her face and neck, soaking her clothes with the hot liquid. She didn’t move at all as she received burn marks. Instead, she waited until Chloé had emptied the cup above her, then suddenly stood up.

Her head felt worse than before but she managed a bright smile through her wet strains, brown streams leaving red marks on her skin while flowing down her face. It burned into her skin like a warm knife that went through butter. Ironically, the coffee looked like tears.

“Thanks, Chloé.”, she beamed at the blonde who had taken a step back, “I think that’s just what I needed. I had a long night, y’know? And I didn’t think of you to be one of the sharing kind. Anyways, if you all will excuse me, Chloé spilled a bit of her coffee and I still got time before class starts, so… I’m going to change. See ya, Chloé! And thanks again for the coffee!”

She licked off a bit of the brown liquid that dripped from her hair.

“It’s really tasty! You need to tell me where you got it.”

With that, Marinette took her bag and calmly walked past her classmates who looked at her dumbstruck. Nino tried to hold her here and he looked concerned, maybe he wanted to look at the burns and bring her to the nurses but she just jumped out of his reach and quickly walked towards the stairs. Of course, the pain was horrible, but for some reason, Marinette didn’t care. Maybe it was still the alcohol in her blood that made her react like that. Maybe she really was losing her sanity due to the treatment she’d received from all the persons who had been important to her.

She didn’t know.

On her way to the stairs, Adrien had taken the last step up and she rushed past him. He almost looked sympathetic but the bluenette scolded herself for thinking that he may be sorry for her and quickly convinced herself that he had only barely managed to suppress a laughter.

As the bell signaled the students that classes were about to start, Marinette sat at her seat again, freshly showered and dressed, not showing any emotions of pain or sadness. She hadn’t even bothered to put something on her burnt skin.

And she didn’t notice the worried glance Nino was giving her. Neither did Alya, who sat on her place, looking down at her notes.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A friend trying to stay strong, another Akuma and a lost hope.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter has a few timeskips, I hope you won't get confused :)  
> Anyway, I'm really unsure about the next chapter. I don't exactly want to spoiler you but it's really hardcore and I'm seriously not sure about uploading it. There's gonna be violence and I feel like it's really pushing the limits of Mature rating but I don't necessarily need it.  
> So let me know in the comments if you're up for this scene or if I should leave it out since it's not really story relevant but explaining one or two things.  
> For now, enjoy~

After class, Nino mustered up all the courage he had and stood, stepping in Chloé’s way. Marinette was already out, she probably ran off somewhere. But the rest of the class stilled as the blonde mustered the boy from head to toe.

“And you want?”, she sneered.

“I want you to leave Marinette alone.”, he said, bravely standing his ground. His gaze once again swished over to Alya but the girl was just calmly collecting her stuff, her gaze downcast. As always… His eyes jumped back to Chloé who frowned at him.

“Okay then.”, she suddenly grinned, “Now step aside.”

Nino bared his teeth and shook his head, the stares from the class getting more intense. He knew what he was doing and if it meant defending a murderer in their eyes. But he knew better. He knew she was no murderer.

“I don’t believe you. Leave Marinette alone. Please, Chloé.”

The girl just laughed at that. Her laugh was cold and loud but Nino could hear something other behind that. It was-… A little bit insecurity? Maybe? Sadness? He couldn’t pinpoint it but he was sure it had to do with Ladybug’s sudden death.

“Oh, come on, you wanna-be DJ. She just gets what she deserves. Nothing more-…”, her white teeth shone as she grinned wider, “… And nothing less.”

Nino huffed and squared his shoulders.

“Today was too much. You can’t keep on doing that, Chloé. I won’t stand by and watch. Stop doing this to her.”

Chloé’s face fell a bit when she realized he was really serious about this and wouldn’t let her pass until he heard at least an apology from her. Which she wouldn’t give over her cold, dead body.

“Move, Lahiffe. Or I’m calling my daddy.”

Nino just clenched his teeth at that, forcing out a humorless laugh.

“Do that. Then I can tell him what his stuck-up bitch of a daughter did today.”

A gasp went through the classroom and even Alya looked up when Chloé’s outraged shriek echoed off the walls and her hand connected with his cheek. His head flew to the side from the slap but he still didn’t budge.

“How dare you?!”, she snarled, hitting him again on his other cheek, “How dare you speak to me like that?! I’ll-”

Just as she was about to slap Nino a third time someone firmly took hold of her wrist. She turned her head and her glare met Adrien’s tired green eyes. He lowered her hand without any effort and softly shook his head.

“This is too much, Chloé. Stop treating Marinette like that. And stop slapping Nino.”

She placed her other hand on her chest and dramatically gasped.

“But Adriki-”

The boy just warily shook his head and went over to Nino, placing a hand on his shoulder and squeezing it.

“The coffee was unjustified and mean, Chloé. Nino’s right, you went too far.”

The gazes of the class went from the two boys to Chloé and back again, a few gulping when Chloé’s face only hardened.

“It wasn’t, and you know tha-”

“It was.”, Nino growled, “Marinette’s not guilty and that coffee seriously burned her face, you saw that. And yet you can still laugh about it.”, he huffed once more, “Despiteful, man. And seriously not cool.”

She only huffed and straightened her back, suddenly losing her theatrical tone from mere second ago and stalked past them, moving out of the way before Nino could grab her. Sabrina followed on her heels and the two of them vanished down the stairs. Nino scowled, rubbing one of his cheeks.

“One day she’ll get it back. One day.”, he threatened, looking after her.

The class silently packed their stuff together and they all moved past him, following Chloé down the stairs since they knew they had just stood by and watched as well and nobody wanted to get in Nino’s way right now. Even Alya just shouldered her bag and quickly walked past him, heading to the library. When Nino went back to his desk he and Adrien were alone. He hauled his bag on his shoulder and turned to the door to run off like the others but this time it was the blonde who blocked the way.

“Let me see this, Nino.”

The young DJ just gave him a look and snorted humorlessly before wanting to walk out of the classroom but his friend placed a flat hand on his shoulder and gently turned him to look at him.

“Please.”

Nino wrinkled his nose.

“It’s nothing. Let me through, dude.”

Adrien tried to stand his ground but his hand sank after a short staring battle and Nino resumed walking. Just when he was out the door, Adrien thought to have heard his friend murmuring.

“… You didn’t ask Marinette either…”

 

* * *

 

Sirens blared through the early morning air and caused a very sleepy blonde boy to snap up in a sitting position. He yawned and immediately got up to look outside.

Nothing unusual greeted him. The perfectly cared for garden of the Agreste Mansion, the neighboring houses, the grey sky, just tinged with a little sunlight, the green vines climbing up some street lanterns, a stray kitty walking down the stre-… Wait, _what_?!

Adrien’s eyes widened and he pressed his cheek against the window as he tried to look down the street. Why were there vines everywhere?!

He opened a window and heard a distant, feminine cackle. Just as the sound faded he rolled his eyes.

“Not again-… Not right now, c’mon…”, he glanced at the clock above his door, groaning when he saw that it was five in the morning.

“Ishn’t it, like-… Way t’ early for shis kinda shtuff…?”, Plagg drawled from his bed, sounding very regretful of his whole existence.

Adrien just nodded in agreement and sighed.

“It is, but-… Hawkmoth doesn’t seem to think so. Come on, get up, we gotta get going.”

Plagg growled at him and buried his face in Adrien’s pillow.

“Nooooooouuuuuuuuh…”, he whined and the blonde nodded, understanding him more than ever.

“Plaaaaaaaagg! We gotta stop that darned Akuma!”

His Kwami tried to hide further so he picked up a piece of camembert from the desk where Plagg had left it after yesterday’s Akuma attack and went to his bed, holding the stinky cheese closer to the Kwami.

“Eat up, buddy. We have to go.”

Plagg’s eyes narrowed to slits as he finally looked up, hesitantly taking the piece of camembert.

“What about you, kid? Don’t you wanna eat something as well?”

Adrien merely huffed at that.

“No time.”

His Kwami sat up, biting off an edge of the cheese.

“Kid, you have to eat. I don’t want you to be dead on your feet. Run down and get a slice of bread from the kitchen, that’s enough for me. I’ll be finished when you come back.”

“No Plagg, just eat up and then transform me!”

“Adrien.”, suddenly the Kwami looked really serious as he laid the cheese aside, “I’m not eating until you get yourself something.”

Adrien just growled and ran out of the room to get a slice of bread. He knew Plagg was way too stubborn to be argued with and when he denied his beloved cheese the boy knew there was nothing to do but obey the Kwami’s orders.

For such a tiny being he had a massive stubbornness to himself.

As the blonde slipped into the kitchen his traitorous stomach began churning. _Of course_ , Adrien _rolled his eyes, of course I have to get really hungry now…_

So he grabbed two slices of bread, put some kind of marmalade on it (he didn’t check what marmalade, he just grabbed one) and ran up to his room again, the two slices of bread with the marmalade almost spilling on his shirt.

When he arrived back in his room Plagg had naturally already eaten up. So much for his threat. Adrien managed to change into normal clothes while eating since he suspected that this Akuma attack would last until school started, or maybe even longer, so he could maybe pretend he overslept again. Or fell asleep after a sunrise shoot? Yeah, that was better.

He groaned. Soon he would be out of excuses.

As soon as he was finished he called upon his transformation and jumped out of his window, eager to end this Akuma quickly, even if he was practically dead on his feet because of sleep deprivation.

The day before he had had to fight an Akuma that had turned people to lizards. With no cleansing light from Ladybug they stayed that way, which made Akumas so much crueler. Plus, he’d had to fight him until sundown and after that still had to do his homework until after midnight. Being out again already was-… Just eating on his nerves. And his concentration.

He sighed while he dashed over the roofs of Paris, after the Akuma that seemed to be eager to transform Paris into their personal garden. Everywhere were vines sprouting out of the streets and up on the houses, flowers bloomed on the most impossible spots and trees broke open the asphalt of the streets. Along his way he encountered quite a few people trapped in their homes or surprised by a tree growing right in the way of their car. He helped as well as he could but he knew he had to find the Akuma and capture it, only then he could help these people.

In the distance, he heard a police car being stopped, the sirens that were blaring the entire time just cutting off with a faint crash. Thanks to his heightened senses in the suit he knew where it was roughly located.

So Chat got to all four and narrowed his eyes.

He had to stop that Akuma.

He growled under his breath and lunged over another street, from roof to roof, nearing in on the akumatized victim. Hawkmoth slowly but surely lost in strength yet definitely not in persistence. But the most recent Akumas had only to do with living things, things that grew or moved on its own. Nothing that had to be magically moved. Did that mean something?

Well, he had talked to Plagg about the limitations of his powers once and the tiny god of destruction had shrugged, his only answer being ‘infinite’, since he was a chosen. Did that mean Hawkmoth had not been chosen?

He had already suspected that Hawkmoth forced his Kwami to do what he wanted so did that mean he couldn’t use his Miraculous as infinitely as Adrien? Because he wasn’t fit to wear the butterfly Miraculous?

Chat Noir sighed as he jumped around a tree that had sprouted right out of a roof.

He didn’t know anyone else who knew about the Miraculous, their powers and how they worked. Ladybug had once mentioned an old man who had explained a few things to her on a book she had found. He reasoned that this had been the book he had lost the same day he had taken it out of his father’s safe. His eyes widened and he almost missed a step, just barely catching himself by ripping his arms in front before slamming down on the roof.

His father!

It was his book to begin with! Why did he have it at all? Adrien had never really thought about that after Volpina, after he had lost it he had pretty much forgotten about this book, out of shame to have stolen _and_ lost it on the very same day.

But his father had used the designs that reminded him of Miraculous forms on multiple occasions in his designs, hell even his shoes wore an outline of a butterfly!

So either his father had believed the book had just been an illustrated fantasy novel in a foreign language or he really knew what a Miraculous was.

Could it be?

That his father could know what a Miraculous did, what it was, maybe a little bit more?

He had reacted a little weirdly to his ring a few times…

Maybe he could-… He could talk to him about it? And-… Not be alone anymore?

Chat shook his head as he finally got a glance at the Akuma. He couldn’t be distracted from the fight, as tempting as talking to his father may seem. He had to keep his head in the game.

That’s another thing. He would’ve made at least a few nature puns by now but-… Without anybody telling him to stop it wasn’t any fun anymore. No, well-… When Ladybug wasn’t around to tell him to stop.

He shook his head and observed the Akuma instead, furrowing his eyebrows.

It was a woman, maybe in her thirties? She wore a dark green suit that was covered in patterns reminding him of ivy leaves and a mask that seemed to be a mix between Hawkmoth’s trademark butterfly mask and-… A skull?

What was that all about?

“I AM SNAPDRAGON!!”, the Akuma blared, “AND I WILL NOT LET THEM TAKE NATURE FROM ME!!”

Chat Noir sighed and rubbed over his face.

Of course, of course it had to be a plant Akuma. He couldn’t stand these.

She thrusted out an arm and where she pointed plants began sprouting out of the ground, around the houses and covered everything. He growled as a tree broke through the pavement and sent a man up with it, trapping him high up in its branches.

That’d be fun. Yay.

He huffed and straightened up, shouting down.

“Hey poison ivy!! Here I am!”

The woman whipped around and stared up at him, furiously forming something in her fists that he couldn’t make out.

“MY NAME IS SNAPDRAGON AND YOU WILL NOT STOP NATURE!!”

The blonde superhero sighed as she shot something after him. He jumped out of the way, not even looking back with what she had aimed at him. It was better to focus on what her next move was.

 

* * *

 

Marinette wasn’t sure if she would survive this all.

Sure, she had stayed strong since Miss Fortune had turned her life into a living hell and she had managed to stay away from suicide attempts like drinking herself to death or running straight into an Akuma attack or just throwing herself off her balcony.

But as it all became a little too much just when Chloé had confronted her once again, she really began doubting if she would make it through.

Could a human die by the lies told about him? Marinette thought of it as true.

She curled up tighter inside the paper garbage bin that was smelling of plastic, praying that nobody would find her.

She had gone to school, as usual. She had stayed away from everyone, she had coped with her hangover, she had ignored Nino’s worried glances and the hate that got her presented on a silver tablet by everyone. It had been a normal day of avoiding everything, as usual.

Until Chloé had once again lost her temper. She had walked right up to Marinette and had begun yelling the usual stuff.

She was a murderer.

She killed Ladybug.

She was responsible for every following civilian casualty. For every injury.

For Chat Noir’s breakdown, this week after the Snapdragon Akuma. Alya had somehow managed saved him and tried to get him to a hospital but he had declined, that’s everything Marinette knew.

Of course, she hadn’t spoken during her scolding. If she had dared to speak Chloé would’ve made things even worse. But when she had finally addressed Marinette personally, asking her how much her father hated her now, Marinette wished she would’ve spoken.

Because she didn’t know that Chloé had wanted an answer. She had remained stubbornly quiet and had looked up at Chloé through empty eyes.

That’s when the blonde had snapped. She had lifted her hand and had slapped Marinette across the cheek.

The bluenette had stood up without another word and left the classroom. Behind her the commotion had begun and she vaguely recalled someone holding Chloé back, but she couldn’t care less who it had been. Though she might have seen a red flash. Either it had been Nino’s cap or Sabrina’s hair but really, she didn’t care.

She had found this dumpster and, well… Had done it like the trash. She had thrown herself away.

Wondering if she would every come out of this alive.

Wondering if she could live a normal life at all from this moment on. The whole of Paris knew and hated her. Moving away wouldn’t get her anywhere. She knew that her past would catch up to her and as soon as somebody caught that she was a murderer she would once again have the same problems.

Her career as a designer had become nothing more than a desperate wish. Nobody wanted to buy clothes of a murderer.

And she had the daughter of the mayor as a personal poltergeist. She was sure Chloé had the power and influence to keep an eye on her and possibly even manipulate people and documents so that she’d end up on the street since her father would want to have her out of the house as soon as she was of age. Which would be in a few months.

She sighed and nestled deeper into the paper in her garbage bin, not noticing that she slowly fell asleep.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Marinette's classmates are not the only ones out there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so... As mentioned in the last chapter, I'm really unsure about posting this.  
> In my opinion it's not story relevant but it's explaining one or two things. A commenter named Kater had the idea to make it a vote. So I'll upload this now since most people said they didn't mind and if you guys don't want the chapter I'll take it down again.  
> Just let me know in the comments, I'll decide when I upload the next chapter then.  
> So again, I'm really unsure about this and it's pretty violent so I wanna put a warning here.  
> Read this at your own responsibility. This chapter contains a lot of graphic violence and in my view it's really pushing the limits of the Mature rating. If you can't take violence then I'd advise you to skip this chapter, after this a much less violent chapter will follow.

When Marinette was on her way to the store she already felt something behind her. Her mother had sent her to buy some milk and eggs since they had spontaneously run out of these. It was already dark and late into the evening but she had just nodded, taken the twenty euros, ignored her mother’s offer to buy something for herself and quickly stepped out, not to feel the disapproving glares her father sent her way for any longer.

Everytime she interacted with her mother he watched his daughter like a hawk, openly making her feel his tenseness when she was around his wife.

Sabine often had talked to him about that - with Marinette present and without alike - but it hadn’t made a difference. Tom’s glares stayed and the girl continued to drift away from her parents.

Marinette’s hands flew up to her ears and she gulped as she heard footsteps, syncing up with hers. Suddenly it was a few more pairs of footsteps and she shoved the twenty euros deeper into her pocket even though she suspected if a conflict was about to happen it would not be because of her mother’s money. She breathed through and straightened up, bracing for whatever was about to happen.

When she was next to an empty store someone passed her. She already allowed herself to breathe through since she believed she was out of danger before he turned sharply and stepped in her way, roughly pushing her back.

Another guy came up from behind her and rammed his shoulder against hers, making her fall against the door of the empty shop. The two guys she had already seen cackled and had suddenly doubled, now four guys surrounding her.

She willed her swimming vision to clear and glanced up just as a fist came flying towards her. She was too slow to dodge. The hook that connected with her jaw caused her head to snap back and bang against the door. She winced loudly but a rough hand pressed down on her mouth and muffled every noise. Her jaw sent waves of pain through her body and she was pretty sure the guy broke it.

The guy that held her mouth shut grabbed the shirt at her stomach and the collar, lifting her up on the fabric and shoving her back. She felt glass crack behind her, realizing that the shop door had a glass window in the upper half. The guy that held her up cackled and stepped to the side, still holding her up and nodding at another man.

“Kick her through the door, man!”

She tried to scream and curl up but the guy had already lifted his boot and it made impact on her stomach. She felt the glass splintering and suddenly she fell backwards with a strangled sound, hitting the floor in the abandoned entrance area of the shop.

She cried out and tried sitting up as the glass shards she fell on cut into her hands and back. The guys removed some glass shards on the bottom of the window in the door and then sat on the frame, pulling their legs over one after the other and entering the room. There were five persons now, all grinning in the dimly lit shop, the only light coming from the lanterns outside. Marinette propped herself up and despite the nauseating feeling in her stomach tried to push herself back, away from them. She knew it was of no use. She knew they had her cornered. She knew she wouldn’t be able to escape.

A woman she didn’t see before grabbed her collar and grinned in her face.

“Listen here, murderer. We’re pissed the police doesn’t arrest you. You belong in prison like the other murderers. Nobody gets a special treatment in front of the law – except you. So now we’ll give you a special treatment.”

Marinette whimpered and tried to flee from her firm grip, already feeling something warm running down her fingers and palms.

“P-Please-… I’m i-innocent-… Please-… D-Don’t hurt me…!”

The group just cackled and moved a left-over board of wood that leaned on the wall against the door so that nobody would be able to look inside. The bluenette gulped.

“… P-P-Please…!”

“Oh yes, beg and plead a little more! Maybe then you’ll remember what you did to Ladybug!”, the woman exclaimed with a cruel smirk, lifting her fist to let it connect with Marinette’s nose.

The girl cried out in pain as she heard her nose crack and protectively pressed her hands on her face, weakly kicking to get the woman off of her but she only pulled her closer to her face, a breeze of her sickly-sweet perfume washing over the smell of blood.

“You’re dirt to our feet, kid. You’re dead meat when we’re finished with you. What you did to Ladybug is unforgivable. So we won’t have any mercy on you, you bitch.”, she spat, a few drops of spit hitting Marinette’s face.

“N-No-… No! P-Please, d-don-”, before she could even finish the word a foot jabbed into her stomach and she spluttered and coughed.

From then on, she didn’t remember much. Suddenly everyone was starting to kick or punch her and soon, her cries faded out. At some point, she was upright and they held her in place while they took turns to punch her as hard in the stomach, ribs or face as they could. Then they laughed and each took her wrist once, sending her flying until she crashed down in another part of the room before getting picked up again. As they continued to beat her up she became quieter and quieter since she just couldn’t react anymore. Her voice failed her, as did her mind. Her bones cracked one by one, she felt her ribs buckling and giving in, her arm snapping as she hit the floor once more, her legs as they kicked her knees the other way. Her nose had an ugly shape as far as she could judge because suddenly she could _see_ her nose.

Marinette slipped more and more out of consciousness until she finally, thankfully blacked out.

 

* * *

 

As she woke up again it just dawned. A soft ray of sunshine fell through the door and she blinked against the sudden light. Shouldn’t she be dead?

She winced as she felt incredible pain shooting up her leg because somebody moved it. Out of instinct she wanted to flinch away, it could be one of them, but she couldn’t move at all. Her body was too broken for her to even think straight. She closed her eyes and sobbed because of the pain. As she opened them again she saw an old man crouching over her. He looked a little familiar but she was way too delusional to realize who it was.

The old man straightened out her arm and she silently cried out in pain as her broken bones were moved. He ignored her whimpering and began murmuring quietly. She felt oddly warm where his hands roamed over her body and suddenly her arm felt sore and beaten up but not broken anymore. She tested this out by moving her fingers and even though she felt pain it was dulled and not searing anymore. Did he just-… Heal her?

She moved her toes, then her ankles and knees. She could move everything. As soon as the old man noticed she moved her legs he placed a hand on her forehead.

“Shh, lay still, child…”, he smiled reassuringly, “It takes a little time to heal. Don’t move.”

She immediately complied, feeling safe with this weird man. He used words like heal. And it felt good to let him run his hands over her arm.

Just as she drifted off to doze a bit he moved to her chest, resting his hands on her ribcage in a professional way, not daring to touch her where his hands didn’t belong. She really felt safe with him.

“I’m sorry I can’t do more for you…”, he suddenly said and her eyes flew open again. Her arms, legs and ribcage were already healed by his-… Magic? Was that magic? She didn’t question it in her beaten-up condition. But her jaw still remained broken since he apparently hadn’t gotten there yet. So she was unable to speak, much less ask him why he was sorry for not doing more for her.

He looked up to her as he got all ribs, then cupped her nose with his hands and smiled sadly.

“You’ve been really strong up until now, child. I am very proud of you.”

Her nose straightened out to its original state again and Marinette whimpered at the brief pain as her nose adjusted. The old man observed his work and deemed it okay, then he cupped her jaw while the girl asked herself why he was saying these things.

“I really wish I could do more for you… I’m so sorry, Ladybug. Keep staying strong, you will find a solution.”

Her jaw snapped back in place and she stared at him, ignoring the pain because _he just called her Ladybug_!

A name numbly started resurfacing in her mind but before she could remember him properly he touched the area on the base of her nose, between her eyebrows, with his index finger. She tried saying something but he just smiled.

“You will find a solution, Marinette. I know it.”, before she could say anything he continued, “And now sleep.”

Her head immediately fell back and she was in deep slumber again.

Master Fu sighed and stood up, glancing at Wayzz as the Kwami zipped down to her, placing a tiny paw on her cheek.

“Talk to me, my friend. Is she going to be okay?”

The Kwami sighed and leaned his big forehead against her cheek.

“Not for too long anymore. Let’s hope she’ll last until she finds that solution you spoke of.”

Master Fu huffed and held out his hand for Wayzz to settle in.

“I believe in her. She’ll get back up again. She’s a chosen Ladybug, she can do this.”

The Kwami flew back into the collar of his Master’s shirt and sniffled.

“Let’s hope, master. Let’s hope.”

 

* * *

 

Marinette awoke a second time that day a few hours later, still well before noon. She inspected all her injuries that remained without even remembering the old man’s visit.

Her face was heavily swollen on some places and her body had different colors everywhere. Everything hurt, everything was straining to move but luckily, they hadn’t broken her any bones. She climbed out of the empty room, wincing when she had to move her bruised limbs.

When she was finally out she headed to the store, ignoring the glances of the passing citizens. Some looked worried, some disgusted, some even satisfied when they recognized her but Marinette didn’t care. She went into the store, brushed off some people who snarled at her that she just got what she deserved, politely shook her head to a few concerned people who asked if they could help her or escort her to the police and bought milk and eggs as her mother had instructed her to. She then went home.

When she entered through the front door she immediately heard the commotion from above, then her mother appeared at the top of the stairs. Her hands flew up to her mouth as she saw her daughter beaten up so bad that she could barely look through her eyes but Marinette just ascended the stairs, handed her shocked mother the milk and eggs and went past her, entering the apartment. Her father spared her a glance, his eyes widened but he turned away again. She didn’t give him any kind of acknowledgement as she went up to her room, picked up her school bag and went down again. Her mother had overcome her shock and came back in, stopping her daughter from escaping her. Her voice was low and dangerous as she softly grazed Marinette’s cheek and cupped her jaw to make her look up.

“Who-… Who did this to you…?”

The bluenette merely shrugged.

“Marinette, we have to go to the police… Is anything broken?”

Her daughter tried to take a step around her but Sabine wouldn’t back down so easily.

“Please, be reasonable, Marinette… They could’ve killed you…”

“I’m fine. Really.”

“You certainly don’t look fine! Set down your bag, we’ll go to the hospital immediately.”, she shot back, already reaching for her keys. Marinette held her eyes open with difficulty but she managed to shake her head and took a step back instead, out of Sabine’s grip.

“I don’t want to. I’ll go to school now. Have a good day.”

“Wh-What, we-”

“No. I’ll go now.”, she interrupted her, quickly walking around her and descending the stairs. Her mother was too dumbstruck to hold her back.

In school Marinette entered the classroom during a break. She managed to make it to her seat without anyone noticing her. And when her classmates slowly filed in after the school bell rang she kept her head down, ignoring Nino’s gasp and Chloé’s hateful snarl.

Unfortunately for her, Nino didn’t let it go. He walked up to her after setting his bag down and slid onto the bench next to her.

“Marinette?”, she didn’t answer, “Who did this to you?”

And once again she remained quiet until he gave up because the lesson started.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Slowly, Adrien and Alya come to realize what and how much of it has gone wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's honestly a miracle I'm still uploading.  
> I was this close to taking Breeze down because of admittedly a lot quite demanding comments telling me how to write my story. Well, but here we are. Late, but still here.  
> The reason why it is so late is because I have been working on something for you guys. Since I got so much negative feedback I decided to write an analysis of my own story and characters to explain a few things. I hope you'll find your answers.  
> Also I'm sorry I haven't answered to any comments. I figured your questions would be solved with this post. Here's the link, if you got a question read that and if you don't find your answer, please feel free to comment and I will answer again.  
> (The analysis is not quite finished, I will continue working on it and I think the rest will be up in a few hours)  
> https://awesomefreckledjesus.tumblr.com/post/164935761841/breeze-analysis

It’d been two months now. Two weeks filled with a constant circle of forgetting and worsening the feelings inside her. Marinette knew, she wouldn’t be able to keep that up for much longer.

But that’s what she wanted. She wanted to break, because she as the only one who hadn’t lost the greatest hero Paris ever had, wanted to feel the pain everyone else felt.

She wanted to please everyone with her frustration, with her hopelessness.

Because that’s what they felt and that’s what she’d give to them.

She hated being the only one knowing the truth. If she didn’t she at least would understand the pain the others were going through. But like this?

Sometimes she didn’t know if she was still sane. Why would she want to hurt herself, break herself? Why would she want to feel the loss everyone felt but her? Out of loneliness, because she wanted to fit in?

She would never again be able to fit in.

Maybe in another land.

In the jungle.

Far away from civilization.

Maybe there nobody had heard of Ladybug. Of Ladybugs death.

Marinette felt hot tears stream down her face again as she opened the next bottle but found herself shaking her head, saying she already had enough. Enough to make her forget.

To make her suffer.

Not to kill her.

She closed the bottle again, letting it roll into the alley. She listened to the piercing sound of glass on asphalt through the quiet night. As did someone else. A black figure jumped down from the roof above the little alley and crouched down next to her sending a little breeze sweeping over her face as he landed. She barely managed to look over to the person but she’d recognize that voice anywhere.

“Marinette?”, it was cold, much like the night or the asphalt she was laying on.

“H-Heey-… Sch-… Ch-at-…”, she managed, slurring her letters, making it hard for her to say anything at all. Her whole face was numb.

“You need to get home.”, he said, scooping her up. Only then he looked around and noticed the two bottles, one of them completely empty.

“You drank a whole bottle of Vodka _by yourself?!_ ”, his tone was sharp, making her flinch in his arms.

“N-Nnnooo-… M-Maybee-… Li-Like-... Three q-qua-quarters orr sooooo-…”

He gulped but remained calm.

“What’s with the other bottle. Whiskey? It’s opened. Did you plan on drinking that as well?”

“Nnnnoooo-… W-Was- going t-tooo-… But nnnooooo-…”

He nodded, abandoning the bottles, directing towards the side walk. She stumbled and fell but he was quick enough to catch her and bring her to her feet again.

“Do you even know what that does to you?”, he quietly asked.

“Y-Yeah-…”, she hiccupped, trying her hardest not to throw up, “B-Buut ‘ts not a-as painful o-or u-unhe-… Unheal-… _Bad_ aaas what m-my f-familyy or classma-ates d-do to me-…”

“What does your family do to you?”, he questioned, picking her up in his arms because she wasn’t able to walk anyway.

“M-My father h-hates mee-…”, she muttered, her head rolling around, “C-Cuz I kil-led Ladybuug-… And my-my mother, sh-she c-can’t believe I’m s-su-such a failure-… So I’m t-trying to f-forget.”

She now was on the verge of tears but managed to swallow them. He didn’t seem to notice.

“Does-… Does anyone know? Does Alya know?”, he felt safe to ask for Alya because he was pretty sure she wouldn’t remember anything of this. And she wouldn’t question him knowing about her friend, being as delusional as she was now.

“Al-Alya-…”, Marinette snorted.

Chat tilted his head, scooping her up a little more.

“What about her? What’s so funny?”

“Sh-Sheee’s n-noot my f-friend-… ‘Nymore-… B-Because I w-wa-as a b-bad frieeee-nd… And sh-she’s g-given up o-on my ‘cuz I k-killed h-her c-crussshhh.”

“Her crush?”

“A-Alya was cr-crushing hard o-oooon La-dy-bug f-foor sure-… Sh’s the Ladybug-blog-… Thingy y’know?”

Marinette giggled but almost immediately went silent again. As if she was afraid to show emotions.

Chat nodded and continued his path.

He didn’t know why he was doing this, bringing Marinette home and all. He had recognized her from the roof already. The murderer of his lady. But he knew he couldn’t let her stay in this alley, drinking her brain away. Though, he had to constantly remind himself that it hadn’t been her fault even though everyone treated her like it was.

Hell, even he himself treated her like that.

And now seeing her here, looking past the facade she put on at school, seeing how it hurt her the most that she’d killed a human being, his Ladybug, he felt pity for her.

All day in school he had ignored her as her life fell to pieces.

It was his job to look out for the citizens in Paris, to keep them safe, in and out the mask, but had found satisfaction in how she’d suffered.

Suddenly, he felt ashamed and disgusted of himself, carrying this broken girl back to her home, filled with nothing but alcohol, loneliness and her guilt that weighed down on her shoulders.

He felt guilty for letting her fall into a pit like this.

“Yeah I know…”, he muttered.

“Hey Chat?”, she suddenly asked, no more stuttering in her voice, although she still slurred.

He looked up, meeting her clouded gaze.

“Yes?”, he asked, probably colder than he had meant, because he just had to think of his Lady, of her suffocating while looking into these innocent eyes.

“Put me do-own, please.”, he obeyed but held her in his arms, steadying her stance as she stumbled, “Let m-me go.”

Her voice was calm and soft, yet still shaking deep inside. He looked down at her, questioning.

“Let me gooo so I can heeaad home – alone.”, she said, lightly pushing herself away from him.

“But-… You’re heavily drunk. You can’t even stand on your own. I’m going to-…”

“No.”, she firmly protested her eyes narrowing.

He leaned her against a wall and steadied her on both shoulders while tilting his head.

“Why would you want to go alone anyway?”

She only smiled, then brought a hand up to his face. She touched his hair, letting the soft and silky blonde strings flow through her numb fingers, but avoided his skin, knowing he wouldn’t allow her to touch him like that. Like he had wanted his Lady to touch him. Little did he know that she was standing right before him, broken and alone. Tears pooled in her eyes and he swallowed while denying that he liked having his hair stroked like this – by her.

“Because yoouu don’t want my company. Aaaand I said eeverything that I neeed’d t’ say. S-ooo-…”

“What makes you think that it’s everything I wanted to hear?”

She laughed at that but quickly stifled her outburst, again with this odd fear of showing anything near emotions.

“That’s ’cuz you haaate me. I killed the love o-of yoouur life. And I don’t deseerve happiness a-anymore, ‘cuz I killed a f-friend aaand another an-d hurt another aaaand you and-…”, she counted by using her fingers and scrunched together her eyebrows as if she tried to remember.

He shook his head, cutting her off.

“I’m bringing you home, regardless of what you have to say against it. It is my duty to protect the citizens of this city, including you. And now-…”

He saw the sadness in her eyes. Saw her loneliness taking over. Saw her drowning in her tears and sorrow. Regret. Hurt. Pain. Misunderstanding. Anger.

It all hit him as he held her gaze for the first time in two months. Her lips formed a little smile and he wondered how she could still do that.

“You neeeed to let me go-o now.”, she calmly stated, removing his hands from her shoulders. Somehow she sounded so much like Ladybug, with a softness to her voice that had constantly melted his heart back then, “You need t-to let me gooo. And I ho-ope we won’t seee each other aagain.”

She started to stumble down the side walk, supporting herself on the walls, leaving him behind dumbstruck.

“W-Wait, what do you mean by that?!”, he called after her, almost following her but his feet were glued to the ground while his brain was yelling at him to go after her.

She took a deep breath, obviously concentrating on not slurring or stuttering anymore.

“I’m saying that I hope I’ll be able-… To set an end to this fast enough so you won’t be punished with the sight of your love’s-… Murderer anymore.”

He knew, her spirit had been broken. Her life force.

This one day that had robbed him of his Lady had taken Marinette’s life. He knew, since then, everything had been taken from her.

Her family, her friends, her motivation, her emotions, her happiness, her future, her everything.

And something she didn’t tell him. Something that had made a huge difference in just killing Ladybug. Something that worsened the whole thing.

As he looked up from his feet he didn’t know he was looking at, she had already vanished into the night.

 

* * *

 

The next morning, Adrien awoke silently, even earlier than his alarm clock.

He opened his eyes and remained in the same position he woke up in, on the side, facing his desk. Plagg laid next to him on the pillow, happily snoring. Quietly, Adrien got up and sat down on his sofa. Marinette’s condition made his stomach ache.

Of course it was his duty, as Chat Noir and as Adrien, to protect the people of Paris the best he could. And if that meant to help his classmate, murderer of his love, so be it.

But he couldn’t. He just couldn’t.

Every time he would look into her eyes he saw Ladybug, her face turning blue, blood everywhere, heard her chocking and _begging for-…_

Adrien groaned, clenched his teeth and brought his hands up to his eyes, rubbing them furiously to keep the images away. He suppressed the growing sobs in him and shook his head violently.

No, he wouldn’t be able to help her.

She was in this alone.

He couldn’t help his lady’s murderer, couldn’t stand her innocently guilty blue eyes that had watched Ladybug’s death. But he couldn’t just stand there and watch her destroy herself either.

He knew it wasn’t her fault.

He knew it had been Hawkmoth who had killed her, Hawkmoth commanding Miss Fortune to do it. Every single Akuma had rubbed it into his face, that his lady wouldn’t come to accompany him, never again. He sighed, leaning back.

Today he would try to ask Marinette about it. Maybe she would want to open to him, too? Like she did with Chat?

Adrien wasn’t even sure if he wanted her to do that. Of course he had a duty to fulfill, Ladybug would want him to go help her murderer through this, but he wasn’t sure if he’d just punch her in the face as soon as she opened her mouth. He silently decided to strip his arms to his sides to prevent that. He had beaten her up enough as Chat, he wouldn’t beat her up as Adrien as well.

 

* * *

 

As he arrived in school, Marinette came towards him again. Today, she wasn’t covered in anything Chloé might have spilled on her but was still leaving. They met at the bottom of the stairs, Adrien collecting all of his guts to hold her back on her arm.

“Marinette?”, he asked.

She looked up to him, kneading the faded and worn bracelet that he briefly remembered had been the object in which her akuma had sat, trying her hardest to suppress the tears which were dangerously near to spilling down her cheeks. She nodded slightly, yanking her arm from his grip but he wouldn’t let her go. Not exactly as soft as he tried to be but he managed to not scare her away completely.

“I noticed-… That smell-…”

She looked away, bringing up a hand to her assumingly painfully throbbing head.

“It’s alcohol, isn’t it?”

Shocked, she looked up, eyes full of tears.

“I’m-… okay-…”, she managed.

“You’re not okay. Do your parents know about this? Does anyone know about this?”

She shook her head, clenching her teeth. Suddenly a breeze of coldness washed over her, straightening her back and reducing her tears to nothing. With narrowing eyes, she gripped the strap of her bag tighter and looked up to him with a seriousness he hadn’t expected.

“No. And it will stay this way. Now let me go. I’ve got classes to attend to.”

He finally released her and watched as she turned around and walked up the stairs again. Shrugging, he went after her, brushing it off.

She wouldn’t be fine.

But it was none of his business after all.

 

* * *

 

Marinette reached the end of the stairs and was relieved to find the door to the classroom opened up. Quickly, she entered and ran past the desks to get to the back of the room. She didn't notice Alya's glance that followed her back as soon as she was behind her.

Her former best friend frowned and sniffed the air, as a breeze was created by Marinette walking past her, pulling her eyebrows together.

There it was again, the smell she had noticed a few times now.

_Strange_ , she thought, _it smells like alcohol._

Had her former best friend been drinking?

Alya sniffed again, nodding. It definitely was alcohol, she knew that smell. Slowly she began to worry. Of course she had never forgiven Marinette for killing Ladybug, although she knew it was not her fault. And even though Marinette had repeatedly tried to tell her classmates that the hero wasn't dead, Alya had tried her best to not listen to it.

Ladybug hadn't shown herself for months now and the last she'd heard of her was through Miss Fortune's – Marinette's – mouth, claiming she was dead.

Alya couldn't believe her best friend had killed the greatest hero in all of Paris and now, on top of everything, tried to convince everyone that Ladybug wasn't dead. That was just a lie. And it was rude.

But since she'd understood that nobody was going to believe her, everything had turned to the worst for Marinette.

Alya saw her being bullied every day, primarily from students of the classes in their year but also in the breaks, from students from upper and lower classes. She knew that the bluenette had completely shut off herself by avoiding people and public places the best she could. She never showed up anywhere anymore except for school.

But the fact that she had found alcohol to be the solution genuinely worried Alya now.

She couldn't concentrate on school anymore. The brunette found herself thinking about her former best friend.

Of course it'd hurt her that Marinette hadn't thought of her as a real friend anymore while she had been akumatized. But she knew best that an Akuma worsened the negative feelings and confused the mind by turning and twisting thoughts that never were meant like that in the first place. Marinette wouldn't ever think of her like that.

After two months of secret glances and after an even longer time of close friendship, Alya finally realized Marinette had been her best friend all along.

It had been Miss Fortune who said she hadn't been her friend, who had said what they had was just fake.

It had been Miss Fortune-... Just as it had been Lady Wifi.

Alya groaned quietly and let her head drop in her arms. Madame Bustier luckily didn't seem to notice.

Of course Ladybug was dead now, but was that Marinette's fault? Miss Fortune was to blame, not the bluenette. She'd blamed her for months now, trying to find someone to be guilty, to let her anger and disappointment weigh on, to make her feel better, because Ladybug's murderer had vanished. It hadn't been her best friend’s actions that had taken the hero's life. But it definitely had been her actions that had destroyed Marinette's life.

Alya had to bite back her tears.

She had let her best friend down while she was having the hardest time. She had let her fall into the nothingness and had done nothing to help her out.

Suddenly she knew that Marinette would never have done the same. She knew that Marinette would've supported her and embraced her if Alya's alter ego had killed Ladybug.

But still...

Still, Marinette had said herself that Alya hadn't been her friend. She'd snapped at her after Alya had stood up to her, had called her a fake friend.

She would have to talk to Marinette.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Looks like someone is finally getting their act together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all, I wanna thank all of you for your kind comments. It really helped me a lot that so many people have read my analysis and even if it's not finished yet, I have already received so much positive feedback for it. Thank all of you! Love you all <3  
> And I wanted to offer you guys something.  
> I have a tumblr blog under the name of awesomefreckledjesus. If you want to have a scene written because you feel like it's missing you can send me an ask with Breeze!AU and ask me to write this scene as a prompt. I also have a prompt list, if you want to connect that to a prompt that you think is fitting (doesn't matter if I wrote something to that already) you can pick it and send it to me in the ask. I'll be more than happy to write a few prompts that I haven't included in the story here. So feel free to ask me! :)  
> Again, I'm very happy you guys are responding so kindly to my analysis and fanfiction, it really helped me a lot.  
> I won't abandon this work! I'll upload it completely! Thank you so much for encouraging me! <3  
> For now, enjoy~

Nino groaned as his phone rang another time. He risked a glance and rolled his eyes.

It was Alya again.

“Stop calling!”, he murmured into his pillow, his voice muffled. The call went off and he relaxed again, the hands over his ears going slack.

“Finally…”, another call. He whined in frustration and once again lifted his head to look at the screen. Adrien’s blonde hair was enough to making him flop back down again.

“Fucking-”

“Nino?”

_I didn’t press accept, did I?!_

“Nino, c’mon, maybe you should pick up…”, just his father, phew…

He furiously shook his head and kept his face buried in his pillow as the call died.

“I don’t wanna… They’ll just cry in my ear again how much Marinette’s at fault. I don’t wanna hear that.”

His father sat down on the edge of his bed, the mattress lowering under his weight and the phone slipping against his thigh. The bedframe squeaked a little as he leaned to his son and placed a hand on his shoulder.

“Maybe they wanna talk to you about something else? Homework or something?”

Nino just sarcastically snorted at that and sniffled right after, pressing his face tighter against the pillow as his phone went off again.

“I don’t wanna listen to them at all! Alya was so weird all day and Adrien kept looking at Mari like she was garbage, I can’t put up with this anymore! I don’t wanna talk to them, they’re wrong, they’re wrong and they don’t even stop to consider Mari’s feelings! She’s not at fault, she’s not!”

His father sighed at that and waited until the call once again went out, then he pushed Nino’s phone towards the pillow where his son kept hiding.

“Then tell them.”, he suggested. Nino groaned.

“They won’t listen. I tried, over and over, but Marinette doesn’t even seem to notice I’m holding everyone off. She’s in a way too bad condition to notice at all anymore. And Alya and Adrien always glare at me when I’m trying, they don’t even think about what’s with her. I don’t understand! She and Alya were so close! I-…”, he gulped down the tears that bubbled up in him, “… I don’t know what to do anymore… Can’t I just take Mari and run away with her?”

His father sighed and leant back until he was partly draped over Nino’s back.

“I thought you didn’t like her that way anymore?”

Nino grumbled at that.

“No, I don’t. Of course I don’t. But she’s my friend. I want her to be safe, I’d do the same for Adrien if he wasn’t-… Such an-…”, he pressed the pillow closer to his face to muffle his screaming, “… Such a self-centered asshole!”

His father nodded, Nino could feel that by the way his back slightly jumped up and down on his.

“But he hasn’t been a self-centered asshole before, Nino. Maybe you could try to talk to him, it’s been long enough. And maybe it’ll help that it’s over the phone. Then you can yell at him and everything and don’t have to see his expression?”

The phone went off again and Nino sighed, nudging his father to let him sit up. The weight on his back vanished and Nino rolled over to sit next to his father.

“I dunno… I just-… I can’t put up with this anymore. I’m not even getting the feeling anything I do is helping anymore. When Mari came to school all beaten up she wouldn’t even talk to me. And I can’t even keep Chloé from pestering her all day.”

His father wrapped an arm around his shoulders and pulled him against his chest, leaning his cheek against Nino’s short, brown hair.

“Then maybe it’s time to pull them on your side.”

“Papa, that’s what I tried these past months! I tried everything to make them see, I tried-… I-…”, he sighed deeply as his father spoke up again.

“Then don’t stop trying. Maybe they’ll listen to you, maybe they’ll listen to you tomorrow, maybe-… Maybe in a week. But don’t stop trying. They have to notice that you stand behind your beliefs. And most importantly-”, his father turned him so he could look at him and placed his hands on his shoulders, “Don’t leave Marinette hanging. No matter what. You know her since her birth, you know her way longer than Alya or Adrien. They have to believe you. And if they don’t, no matter what you try, then they’re not worth it. Marinette is not at fault, I needed some time to believe that as well but you proved me wrong. So don’t stop trying, son. Please, answer them and make them see, okay?”

Nino sniffled and leant his forehead against his father’s collarbones.

“I just-… I c-can’t anymore, I don’t have the strength, I tried everything but-… But Mari’s so lonely… And I’m so lonely…”

His father brushed over his hair and wrapped his other arm around his son.

“I know. I know, Nino. But keep staying strong. You’ve been with Mari since you both were babies, you know her in and out. You can do this, okay? And hey, if Adrien and Alya start talking shit then just hang up. They’ll understand then.”

The boy breathed through and lightly nodded.

“Yeah… Yeah. Thanks Papa. I’ll keep it in mind.”

His father smiled and lightly kissed his forehead.

“Should I stay here?”

Nino shook his head and bit his lip.

“Nah, that’s something between me and them. I’ll handle it.”, the phone went off again and he sighed, “I’ll get that. Let’s see what comes out of it.”

His father gave him one last smile and then stood up to leave the room while Nino grabbed the phone, growling at Alya’s picture. He liked that picture. She hadn’t even noticed him taking it, she had been way too engrossed with Mari’s story. These days everything had been cool. Marinette had been more relaxed around Adrien and nothing had been wrong between them. Their biggest worries had been surprise tests and homework. Occasionally Akuma attacks. And now?

Just how low have they sunken…

Nino accepted the call and fell back onto the bed, saying nothing at first to let Alya speak up. She had called, she wanted something of him. He wouldn’t give her anything more than that, much less a greeting.

“… Nino?”, her small voice came through the speaker and immediately, Nino’s heart sunk. She sounded so remorseful, so weak. His fist clenched and he willed his voice to sound cool and reserved. He couldn’t let his feeling get in the way.  
“Alya.”, he responded, his chest tightening at how angry he sounded.

“… Nino, I-… I wanted to talk to you about-…”, she gulped and he nodded.

“Marinette. Right? Wanna put even more blame on her? Talk about her behind her back?”

Alya swallowed thickly and he immediately regretted talking to her like that. No, be angry! You gotta be angry at her!

“I-… I noticed…”, she swallowed again and the raw vulnerability in her voice made Nino sit up again. He couldn’t be mad at her. He just couldn’t when she sounded like that. Damn Alya…

“What’s up?”, he asked now, much softer than before.

“… D-Did you know Marinette’s been drinking?”

That took Nino by surprise. He had noticed she had been way off for a few days now and he had seen her walk funny but he had never thought about her and drinking. Maybe he hadn’t noticed because he didn’t want to see it?

“… Uh-… No… Why are you saying that? Did you see her drinking?”

Alya sniffled and paused a moment, then spoke up again, a slight shiver in her voice.  
“N-No, I-… I didn’t see her drinking. But I smelled it. It’s alcohol. I think she’s even been to school like this.”

“Drunk?”, he lifted an eyebrow. Had he really been that blind?

“Y-Yeah…”

Nino lightly nodded, taking it in. How had he not noticed this? How had he really not seen Marinette’s been drunk right in front of him?

“I-… I’m worrying, Nino… Th-That’s not Marinette…”

Another thing that took him by surprise. She’s worrying for Marinette? After all these months of ignoring her former best friend, after all these months of self-centered mourning for someone she didn’t even know personally, after everything that she’s done to Marinette.

And it needs something drastic like this to make her notice that Marinette’s been miserable since that day? How dare she worry for Marinette now that he’s been worrying about her for months, _months_! Suddenly his anger was back and every fiber in his body was burning. How dare she voice her worries about Marinette to him as if it was something new. Something unfathomable to worry about her when he’s been doing nothing else? How dare she?

“Oh, now you are.”, his voice was dangerous and low, maybe even more than he intended to. Maybe even more than Alya might have deserved because finally she saw what he’s been seeing ever since that day, “Now you’re worrying, yeah?”

“… N-Nino?”

“Oh yeah, no, I get it. Now you worry for her, now that she’s done something so drastic that you can’t look away anymore, huh? Now that she’s doing something only a victim, the victim she is, would do? Huh?! Now that she’s doing something that captured your attention you’re finally worrying?! Oh yeah, I get it. Now that this happened you wanna be there for her, now that you’ve seen how deeply she’s truly sunken because of your ignorance you wanna play the good Samaritan and call me up because hey, what’s Nino been doing these past months?!”

Alya gasped and he could hear the tears in her voice so he clenched his teeth and willed himself to at least speak a little quieter. She’s only doing what he wanted her to do, worry about Marinette. Then why was he so angry at her?

“Nino, I-… Wh-What?”

“… Whatever. Now that you’re finally seeing that something is seriously wrong with her you come to me, then. Why me?”

Alya recovered from the shock that Nino had yelled at her and swallowed again, fighting for her voice.  
“B-Because-… Because you’ve been there for her when I haven’t… I’ve been so, so wrong about everything and I drowned in self-pity. I’m sorry, Nino, I’m so sorry… B-But I’ve already lost enough time. I’ve left her alone for these months, I-… I don’t even know how I haven’t noticed how wrong I was… I-…”, she sniffled and Nino’s shoulders slumped a little, “I’m so sorry to have put her through this and-… And I wanna help her. Yeah, it’s shitty of me to say that now when you’ve tried nothing else than make me see how bad Marinette’s condition is, but-… I-… I don’t wanna continue like that. I-It wasn’t Marinette who killed Ladybug a-and she wouldn’t have done the same to me. I-… I was so wrong and I don’t know how I can ever make it okay again but if I don’t start now then I won’t have a chance at all anymore. It-… It’s not about me or my-… F-Friendship with her. It’s about her health and-… I-… I’d never want anyone having to go through this because I’ve been ignorant and-… And idiotic-… And egoistic-… And so much more…”

By now she was in tears and sobs took over her while Nino’s jaw fell. So she really wanted to try, huh? Maybe it was his feelings for her, maybe it was the relief that she had finally understood what was the real matter here but he couldn’t help but slowly smile. His anger had vanished and only left relief and hope behind.

“So-… So, you wanna help me?”

He heard the rustling of her hair and assumed it must’ve been a nod so he got up and walked out of his room to get his shoes.

“… Y-Y-… Yeah…”, she finally managed to say and his smile grew.

“I’ll be over in a few, then we can talk about this. Oh, and I won’t pay you if you’re working for me, just that it’s clear.”, she snorted weakly and he grinned, his heart finally skipping at her voice again. How he had missed that…

“Okay, I’ll be there in a few minutes, Alya. And then we’ll talk about your trial.”, she snorted again.

“J-Just help me talking to Marinette, idiot.”

“No insulting your boss, apprentice.”, he scolded and she huffed.

“Yea, yeah, just come over and we’ll talk about your conditions on me working for you.”

He chuckled and hung up, then shoved his phone back into his pocket while walking down the street. Maybe they’d finally have a chance again. Maybe the tables would finally turn in Marinette’s favor.

Just as he allowed himself another smile his phone buzzed again.

He checked the screen and scrunched together his eyebrows. It was Adrien.

No, he didn’t want to talk to him. Not now. Not after what he’d done after Chloé had slapped him. Nino growled and turned his phone off. Adrien had been way worse to Marinette than even Alya. He wouldn’t give him a chance as easily.


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes, admitting that one's been wrong is very hard. But it's always easier to have someone enduring that alongside with you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Phew, alright, we're somehow getting there. Sunshine child is still missing in the rescue mission but at least we got two thirds :D  
> Anyway, since still a few people asked why some persons were acting the way they are or why some scenes are missing:  
> Here's the link to my analysis again. You can go read it, it's organized and you don't have to read everything, you can just jump to the point of your question. It's not yet finished but I'll upload the rest later in the story because I've decided that it's too much of a spoiler.  
> Breeze analysis -> https://awesomefreckledjesus.tumblr.com/post/164935761841/breeze-analysis  
> And if you want to have a scene written, for example a Tom/Sabine scene while Marinette is in this condition or another Adrien scene or anything that you feel has been missing in the story up until now, you can send me an ask on that very same tumblr, awesomefreckledjesus, and you can request that scene. Just send me the ask with the scene you wanna have written and I'll write it as an answer! :)  
> Also, I have a prompt list under the second link I'll put here, if you want to have a scene written with a prompt from that list, feel free to send it to me, I'll be more than happy to write you a scene! :)  
> Prompt list -> https://awesomefreckledjesus.tumblr.com/post/163135285581/my-own-prompt-list-for-ml  
> But for now, enjoy~
> 
> Sorry not sorry for that tease >;)

“Alya, it’s for you!”, her little sister yelled.

She sniffled and sat up at another knock on her door.

“A-Alright, alright Amber… I’m coming.”

She opened the door and tried to shoot her sister a smile but it blocked her throat and all she could muster was a nod.

“Th-Thanks…”

“Alya, are you okay?”, Amber blinked with her big brown eyes that she inherited from their mother and bit her lip. This time Alya managed a smile.

“Yeah, it’s okay. I’ll be okay. Sometimes it’s just like this.”

Amber nodded slowly, seemingly unsure if she should accept that answer but Alya brushed over her hair and pressed a little kiss on her forehead before walking to the door.

As soon as Nino came into her sight another sob worked its way up her throat. She willed the tears to stay back as she waved him in.

“Alya?”, he asked, obviously still feeling ambiguous towards her.

“… I-… I know… Just-… Let’s go to my room.”

He quietly followed her, now unsure that he saw how much she must’ve cried. He had never really seen Alya cry. At least not looked her in her face while it happened. Sure, in the last months had been a few situations where she’d begun to cry but she’d always either hid her face or had run away. Or he hadn’t wanted to see it.

They stepped into her room and Alya closed the door with a quiet click, then leant against it with her back after she turned around. An awkward silence weighed on them, neither knowing who should talk first. She kept her gaze downwards, trying to suppress her tears and sniffles.

“So…”, he finally began, his hands buried in his pockets and the playfulness from the call banned from his voice, “Uhm-… I assume we got a whole lot of forgiving to do, huh?”

She hesitantly looked up to his golden eyes but couldn’t hold the gaze. Instead she saw that his cap was tilted on his head. Did he hurry to get here?

Another wave of tears threatened to force Alya to her knees but she withstood and bit her lip.

“W-Well-… M-Mostly you… B-Because I was such a b-bitch…”

Just then he snorted. Her gaze found his again and she saw – much to her relief – disagreement and not amusement in his expression. He shook his head and closed the distance between them, lifting his hands to her elbows which she had kept close to her sides, to keep her from falling apart. His warm palms brushed over her skin and she suppressed another sniffle by pressing her lips together.

“No. Well, yeah, I gotta forgive you but mostly, you gotta forgive yourself for being a bitch. Otherwise you can’t exactly talk to Marinette.”

Just like that her dams broke. She couldn’t keep the tears in any longer and leant her forehead against his collarbone, now sobbing.

Nino wrapped his arms around her and rested his cheek on her hair, gently smiling as he held her tight. Her reaction was enough for him to forgive her. He knew she was being honest and glad that he was here.

So he kept quiet and continued brushing over her back with his hands in calm, slow movements, letting her soak his shirt. Sometime later her hands found their way around his back as well and she finally lifted her face away from the fabric, changing the shoulder to lean on because the other was completely wettened by her tears. She slowly calmed down again, just pressing her cheek against him and listening to their heartbeats. Her knees were wobbly and her throat was feeling raw and dry. He seemed to notice because he sat down on the edge of her bed and pulled her on his lap without breaking the hug and reached for a bottle of water that she always kept on the side, uncapping it and giving it to her. She managed to swallow a few gulps before snuggling against him again, new tears threatening to take over. Nino put the bottle away and brushed over her hair, keeping her tightly against him.

“… S-Sorry… For-… For ruining your shirt…”, she croaked but he just shook his head.

“Don’t worry about it, just calm down first. My shirt’s not important.”

They stayed like this for a while until her breaths were coming out evenly and calm.

“… It’s gonna be okay.”, he finally whispered, tilting his head a little so he could nuzzle her temple, “You’re gonna be okay. Marinette’s gonna be okay. We just gotta start.”

She lightly nodded, wondering if she could ever see it as easy as him.

“… How-…”, her voice was raspy and it hurt when she spoke but she willed herself to continue, “… How d-do I forgive myself…?”

Nino merely shrugged, his hands keeping themselves busy with comfortingly brushing over her back and hair.

“I dunno, really… Maybe tolerate what you’ve done and move on, trying to do the opposite now?”

Alya sighed and turned her head so she could bury her face in the fabric of his shirt again, snuffling.

“Well… I’ve been a bitch…”

Nino nodded.

“Yep, pretty much.”

She couldn’t help but lightly chuckle at his answer.

“Gee, thanks.”, they both snorted but a comfortable silence spread again until Alya spoke up, “… I’ve abandoned my best friend when she needed me the most…”

Nino felt his heart sink at her words. Because, yes, even if he liked Alya, admittedly liked her very much, she was right. She had abandoned her best friend. She had treated Marinette like air in the past months. She hadn’t even bothered looking up when Chloé had slapped the bluenette.

“… Yeah, you have…”, he whispered, every word feeling so incredibly heavy on his tongue. There was no denying it and no sugarcoating the bitter truth.

“… I-… I was unfair… And put s-someone else above her… Someone that I didn’t even know… That I looked up to because she had superpowers…”, her breath hitched, “… I-… I left Marinette completely alone over someone I didn’t even _know_ …”

She felt his embrace tightening around her and pressed her face even more against his shoulder, her glasses uncomfortably pinching her nose, just wanting to forget everything around her and everything that she’s done. Because she was so incredibly ashamed to have done that.

“… Yeah, you have…”, he repeated again and she felt how much he fought with himself to tell her that, “… You left her completely alone when she needed you the most.”

Alya felt another sob building up in her throat but forced herself to breathe through. She had cried enough over herself. She had cried enough over something wrong she had done. It was time that she started tolerating her ignorance and doing better instead.

“I could’ve stopped all this.”, she whispered, her voice muffled by his shirt, “I could’ve told her she hasn’t been herself and I could’ve stood by her. I doubt it would’ve escalated that bad if I had just-… I had ignored my own hurt. She-… She was in a way worse situation than I have been.”

Nino’s hands stilled and he nodded once again.

“She still is, Alya. She still is in that situation. She’s-… She’s getting worse every day. We gotta do something and-…”, he gently pushed against her shoulders to look at her, “… I need you, Alya. Maybe when she sees that you’ve finally understood what’s really going on here she’ll start opening up again. I-… I feel like you’re the key here. Please, please help me.”

Her lower lip trembled again but she managed a steady nod and this time, she held his gaze.

“We’ll get Marinette back. And we’ll protect her. I-… I’m sorry for what I’ve done and I’m-… I’m ready to do better. I’ve mourned someone I didn’t even know for the last months and I acted like a complete bitch. That wasn’t me.”

Nino smiled and brushed a strand of hair out of her eyes.

“That’s the spirit. Man, I’ve missed you like that, Alya…”

She sighed and nodded, rubbing her cheeks to get the dried traces of her tears off.

“Yeah… Sorry…”

He chuckled and shook his head, his thumb coming to a rest on her temple to keep her hair away because she already lowered her gaze again. His other hand gently lifted her chin up for them to make eye contact again.

“Stop apologizing to me, Alya. You gotta start apologizing to Marinette. She still has to forgive you, not me. I already forgave you on the phone. Because I know you’re being sincere.”

She huffed lightly and nodded, not breaking their gaze.

“Yeah, I guess you’re right… I really gotta talk to Marinette.”, then her breath hitched, “Y-… You’re forgiving me?”

Nino smiled at that and his hand on the side of her face adjusted so that he was now cupping her cheek.

“Of course I have. Do you know how long I had to wait for you to finally come around? Today’s one of the happiest days of my life! Because I know that we can change something now, finally.”

Her gaze jumped between his eyes because they were so close to each other and she was overwhelmed by his honesty and hope. His emotions were laid out so openly and raw before her that she didn’t even know how to answer it anymore. He had waited for her to come around. He had waited for her, had fought for her to finally, finally come out of the pit of self-pity in which she had thrown herself. He had held out for so long just for her to come around. He had not once lost his temper and just tried to punch some sense into her, a feeling that she was experiencing right now. A feeling of wanting to go back in time and slap herself so hard she was gonna realize way before now that what she was doing was wrong.

He had waited for her, had scolded her, had tried to argue with her, had soothed her and had dried her tears, unjustified tears, while he had known all along what was happening right in front of her nose. He had not once, not one single time, even thought about doing anything to her even if the anger had bubbled inside him, he had not once tried to just grab her and shake her even though he had seen what Marinette had been going through.

He had been patient, he never lost hope and he had, most importantly, wanted her to realize what she’s been doing herself. He had always pushed her in the direction but he had never tried to get it into her head by force or anything else. He had had the firm belief that she would come around, sooner or later. And he would’ve waited for her. No matter how long it would’ve taken. And just like that.

Just like that he’s forgiving her then.

His kindness and his patience slapped right into her face and her breath hitched as she leant closer.

He had waited for her. He had held out for her. He had shouldered everything just to buy her more time.

Her eyes still jumped between his, waiting for an answer, waiting for a sign that she should stop but all she could see was a smile. So her eyes fluttered close as he hands found their way to his neck.

His hold on her tightened and she felt his breath on her skin as they leant closer and just a few moments until their lips touched-…

Something on her thigh suddenly buzzed. She recoiled out of surprise and if Nino hadn’t held her as tight she would’ve toppled from his lap onto the floor. Both their eyes snapped open and he quickly reached into his pocket to reveal his phone, buzzing with a call. She could just so make out Adrien on the screen as Nino already scowled and tapped the call away.

“… Why is he calling?”, she finally managed to ask, her heart still racing form the almost kiss and the surprise.

“I dunno.”, Nino answered quickly. Maybe a little too quickly, “But he’s been calling all day.”

Alya furrowed her eyebrows and bit her lip.

“And you’re not gonna answer? Maybe something happened?”

His gaze lifted from his phone to look at her again and she could feel herself melting at his eyes.

“Nah, I don’t think so… I think he wants to cry himself out on my shoulder again on how shitty his father’s treating him and if I could send him some homework again because he can’t make it. I don’t want to hear that all over again.”

“But-… He’s your best friend.”

Nino growled and pushed his phone onto the mattress, sliding it away.

“Yeah, but he’s been even more shitty to Marinette than you. I just-… I really wanna just tell him to his face that she used to love him. I wanna see his world crumbling with that.”

Alya gulped and brushed over his cheek so that he’d look at her again.

“Why haven’t you done that yet?”

“Because of the same reason why I didn’t tell you how bad Marinette was getting.”, he said, as if it was obvious, “Because for one, he’s gotta realize that himself, and two, he wouldn’t believe me and think it was just another statement I came up with to make him see something he doesn’t want to see. And, well, I’m probably just too soft to tell anyone off like that.”

Alya bit her lip, once again understanding just how lucky she’s been to have Nino.

“Maybe he’s calling because of the same reason as I?”

He huffed and shrugged, looking at his phone again as it buzzed with another call, again Adrien.

“Yeah, maybe…”

She could feel his uncertainty so she leant around him and pressed herself against his chest to reach for the phone. She managed to grab it and gave it to Nino, trying a comforting smile.

“Just answer. If he’s being self-centered just hang up. I’ll be here, the entire time.”

Nino sighed and looked at her again, slowly nodding.

“Alright…”, he mumbled and pressed accept while Alya snuggled against his chest again, tightly hugging him.

He’s been there for her so the least she could do was being there for him.


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another long overdue conversation, only that this one is not going as smooth as the one before.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so, so much for your kind comments, they really helped me and I'm looking forward to hearing more of you guys! :)  
> Anyway, I wanted to stress here again that I'll answer all questions, I love explaining why I wrote Breeze like that, so please don't feel uncertain to ask!  
> Also, the prompt list can be found on this website under my stories as well, Miraculous Prompts. So if you don't feel like sending me an ask on tumblr you can always send an suggestion with a comment under this fanfiction, I'll see it and do my best to write something to that ;P If you were missing anything in Breeze, I'll happily write it for you!  
> And now, enjoy~

“Yeah?”, Nino grumbled as Adrien’s voice sounded through the phone.

“… Nino?”, the blonde replied, his voice strained and tired. Nino sighed and hugged Alya tighter.

“You called me, Adrien. Of course it’s me. So what’s this about?”

A muffled sound echoed through the line as the blonde seemingly fell on his bed or couch or something. He sighed and waited a moment, then finally spoke up again, quietly.

“… Do you-… Do you think I’m ignorant towards Marinette?”

Alya rubbed over his back so that he wouldn’t say something stupid because she felt him tensing and gritting his teeth. Nino gratefully leant his cheek against her head and nodded so that she could feel it.

“… Adrien.”

“Yes?”

Nino grumbled and willed himself to breathe through, then he slowly straightened up not to surprise Alya too much.

“Yes. I think you’re ignorant. But you already know that.”

Adrien sighed again and rolled around, now lying on his stomach since his voice sounded a little deeper and throatier.

“Yeah, I know that… But, like, should I change something about that?”

Nino completely stilled and squinted his eyes, then forced his stomach to relax.

“… Is that even a real question?”

Adrien nodded before answering again, sounding a little sheepish.

“Yeah, it is. Because I don’t think it’d do anything if I started anything now.”

The brunette groaned and carefully adjusted Alya so that he could lay back on the mattress and still hug her on top of him. He willed himself to stay calm and composed, trying his best to answer as seriously as possible.

“I know that feeling… But Adrien, Marinette needs all the help she can get. It may not look like it but I think she’s grateful for help.”

He heard the blonde breathe through deeply, fabric rustling as he moved. Alya bit her lip as she now propped herself up next to his chest, catching his gaze. Nino shrugged and she lightly nodded in understanding, then Adrien spoke up again.

“… I-… I don’t know if I can ever forgive her, you know…?”

Nino felt furious heat creep up to his face, anger boiling inside as Adrien finished his sentence. Not ever forgive her? What was there even to forgive?!

Marinette had never been at fault for anything! Chloé had provoked negative feelings as she did with everyone, Alya had unknowingly kicked it off and then she had been akumatized! And when she had woken up all she felt had probably been pain and confusion!

She had woken up to being a murderer and had not even known how it had come to that. She had opened her eyes to a world of hate and even though she was getting worse every day she was still standing!

If anything, every single human treating her like trash had to apologize to her like Alya had done to him, there was nothing to forgive her! She was not at fault!

He was about to snap back at him, yell at him that Marinette had been in love with him, punch into his stubborn mind that everything he had done in these past months had been wrong, so wrong, as Adrien spoke again, quieter this time.

“… I really don’t know… It-… It’s not her fault but-… Ladybug’s dead no matter who’s at fault…”, this took Nino by surprise and caused his words to block his throat suddenly. Something in Adrien’s voice sounded so sad, so exhausted and so thick of loss that Nino felt like he had just swallowed his own tongue.

Since when did Adrien not blame her anymore? Since when did he believe she was innocent?

Nino furrowed his eyebrows and reached up to swirl one of Alya’s long locks around between his fingers while he tried to find his voice again.

“… She-… You’re finally-… Admitting it’s not her fault?”

Adrien sighed deeply, sounding so hurt that Nino felt his heart clenching. He didn’t know yet if it was empathy or partly still anger that made him feel this way.

“Ladybug’s death is not her fault, no… I mean, I guess I’ve known for a little longer now but… I dunno, I just can’t-…”, the blonde’s breath hitched and he trailed off.

“… You can’t look at her because you have to think of her, right…?”, Alya quietly said. Her gaze was downcast to Nino’s shirt where she drew little circles on his chest. She sounded embarrassed and rueful.

“… Y-Yeah…? Alya, is that you?”, Adrien asked, surprise openly evident in his question.

“I’m at Alya’s house.”, Nino explained shortly but he was more focused on Alya admitting how she felt about Marinette and he was definitely curious about Adrien’s answer.

“… It-… You feel like that, right?”, Alya now looked up, her gaze focusing on the phone on Nino’s ear, as if Adrien could see her.

A deep sigh sounded from the other end of the line and they finally heard hair brushing against fabric in even movements, a nod.

“Yeah. Exactly like that. I-… I look at Marinette and I can’t help but only think about that day… She’s been the one who was akumatized. Who-…”, he gulped, “… Whose akumatized form killed Ladybug…”

Something in his voice set Nino off. Something was entirely wrong but he couldn’t grasp it, couldn’t understand what was weighing down on his best friend.

“So-… You-… You’re reminded of Ladybug herself or of Ladybug’s death when you look at her?”, he tried to clarify, something in his head aching, something he should know.

Adrien sniffled and brushed over his nose.

“W-Well, I’m reminded of-… Of anything, really. Like-… I just have to think of her. Like, when I see a flower shop I think of flowers but I don’t remember any specific flower. It’s-… More like I’m-…”, he groaned in frustration, “When our gaze meets I feel a cold wave rush down my back. Because-… Because I have to think of Ladybug. And most of the times it’s too painful to really remember her…”

Nino already wanted to ask why Adrien was acting so sensitively since he couldn’t have known Ladybug as well as he was letting on right now but he remembered what Alya had done the past months. She had ditched her best friend for a superhero.

Adrien had not been as close to Marinette as Alya had been. It didn’t justify that he had ignored Marinette the past months but-… It kind of explained why he put more focus on the superhero.

“But-… If you know that she’s not to blame… Why haven’t you told me yet? I-… I’ve been alone all this time! You knew how I felt about all this and even if you didn’t wanna help Marinette, why not at least help me?”, he knew it sounded kind of selfish. But he couldn’t bring himself to care.

“I-… I was held up by my duties and-… I’m busy… And-”

“Yes, of course you are.”, Nino huffed.

“Look, I’m sorry Nino, but I just-”

He growled and interrupted his best friend once again.

“No, no, you look now. _I’m_ sorry. I’m sorry to have thought you’d finally see. I’m sorry to have thought that hey, maybe after all this time my best bud would maybe go back to the incredibly kindhearted person I knew. Goddamnit Adrien, don’t you see what’s happened to you?! I’m sorry, I’m sorry to be disappointed all the time. I’m sorry for myself.”

Adrien tried to speak up once again but Nino cut him off before he could say anything else, now feeling the rage bubbling up.

“I’m sorry that I can’t count on you again. We used to be friends, you know? All four of us. And then everything had to break on something she’s not even at fault for. And you know that. You freaking know that and yet, yet you _still don’t see_. You don’t see what she’s going through, you only see yourself. Again. It’s been the same for months now _, months_ , Adrien.”

“Nino-”, Alya tried but he shook his head.

“Oh no, he’ll hear this now. It’s enough.”, she slid off of him and they both sat up, “How would you feel, huh? How would you feel if your heart was broken and suddenly you woke up in a world where everyone thinks you’re the murderer? How would you fucking feel if everything suddenly turned? How would you feel if suddenly, all around you the people started screaming bloody murder and you don’t remember, you don’t know why, why everything’s suddenly like thi-”

“But I know!”, Adrien suddenly shouted and both Alya and Nino recoiled, “I know what that feels like! I’ve witnessed it twice now, fucking twice! First with Maman and now with Ladybug’s death! When Maman left everything fucking changed and I didn’t know, I didn’t know why but suddenly my whole life had changed! Suddenly my father’s as cold as ice and my schedule’s doubled and I didn’t know, I didn’t know how to handle it, how to deal with it, how to-… Why everything was this way! I woke up, I literally woke up to my Maman being gone and I didn’t-… I still don’t know _why_!”

Nino and Alya shared an uncomfortable glance as Adrien took a brief break to pant heavily, obviously trying to snap out of unpleasant memories.

“And then the same with Ladybug! I-… The day had just started! Marinette had been as jumpy as always, we had been as silly as always and everything had been normal and suddenly I turned around to shouting! Alya and Marinette were running past me and Chloé looked like she was about to combust and I was just on the way to setting her right when-… When Marinette suddenly left the school and just twenty minutes later, just such a short time later, Miss Fortune comes busting into the school and attacks Alya! What the fuck had happened between Chloé and the attack?! A-And then-… Then Miss Fortune says Ladybug is dead and she doesn’t even show up after uh-… Chat Noir defeated her and-… And Ladybug’s not been around since then and _what the fuck_ was I supposed to do, huh?! I-… I can imagine how Marinette must feel because-… Because I-…”, he sniffled and his voice broke, “… I don’t feel m-much different…”

Nino remained silent for a few moments, his thoughts shooting through his mind, connecting things, opening his eyes.

“… You-… You really loved her… Ladybug, you loved her… It wasn’t just a crush…”

Adrien let out a tiny sigh that almost sounded relieved, then he answered in a small voice.

“No, it wasn’t a crush. I-… I was in love with her. We-…”, almost not noticeably an uncertain undertone creeped into his voice, “… We met a few times…? Over the past years and-… We got to know each other a little bit and-… And I fell in love with her…”

Nino sighed, his shoulders slumping. Alya searched for his hand and squeezed it, biting her lip. She held out her other hand, demanding the phone. Nino first furrowed his eyebrows but then gave her the phone, curious what she was planning.

“… Adrien?”, she asked in a small voice and the blonde briefly sniffled before answering.

“… Y-Yeah?”

Alya breathed through, obviously fighting with something, before she spoke up again.

“Listen closely, Adrien. It-… It takes a lot for me to say it but probably even more for you to chew on it.”, she gulped before squinting her eyes and letting the words fall out of her mouth like she had burned her tongue on them, “Ladybug is no more. We can’t help her anymore. And the most miserable human on earth is right in front of our eyes. We have to help Marinette now because I’m sure Ladybug wouldn’t have treated Chat’s murderer like hot air. We-… We have to treasure Ladybug’s life by-… By acting like she would’ve wanted us to. And if anything, Ladybug taught us to value friendship over anything. And-… And Marinette is our friend.”

Nino couldn’t help himself back as he tackled her into a hug. They fell back on the bed and the boy buried his face on the crook of her neck, a breeze of her perfume brushing over his nose. His breath hitched and he swiftly swatted away his glasses, taking care that they wouldn’t fall off the bed or something but focusing on mostly keeping his tears in. She brushed over his shoulder, exchanging a few broken sentences with Adrien before hanging up and reaching over him, probably to fetch his glasses and place them along with hers and the phone on the nightstand.

Then she curled up against him and pressed her nose against his short brown hair, draping both her legs over his thighs to be closer to him since he laid on his side and she was on her back. His arms were tightly wrapped around her and he nuzzled closer whenever he had the chance.

“… Nino… Nino, it’s okay… It’s-…”, she trailed off, then her could hear the smile in her voice as she began to lightly scratch the back of his head, “I’m here. I’m here and we’ll bring our Marinette back… And our Adrien… We’ll do this together, okay?”

He weakly nodded against the crook of her neck, his eyes still squinted, eager not to let one single tear out. His throat was blocked and he fought for his composure, willing, _forcing_ himself not to start wailing loudly. She didn’t exactly make it much easier for him with her soothing voice and her damn calm heartbeat and her gentle, comforting fingers in his hair and her warmth and her tight embrace that was made for him to just-… Let go…

“We’ll get through this…”, she whispered, “We’ll do this, we can do this…”

And before he knew it the first tears trailed down his cheeks. His entire body was shaking of-… Of relief, of disbelief, of-…

He didn’t even know anymore what he was feeling. His insides clenched and relaxed in a rhythm he didn’t know and his mind was screaming. Relief? Anger? Sadness? He didn’t know, he didn’t know anymore.

Was it sadness that Ladybug was dead? That Marinette was in that horrible situation? Was it relief that Alya had called Marinette a friend? Was it pride that Alya had stood up to Adrien like this? Was it frustration that he hadn’t been able to do that?

Nino didn’t know anymore and he couldn’t sort it out. He was just overwhelmed by what wanted to break out of him.

He had probably bottled everything up for long enough. He had bottled everything up for others and had bitten down any negative feelings not to hurt anybody.

And now he was ready to burst, to shatter in her arms. His body trembled and he winced at the force at which his sobs wanted to escape. Alya’s fingers in his hair stilled and he felt her shifting a little so that she laid on her side now as well, pressing her chest against his and entangling their legs. Her cheek came to a halt on his head and she tightly hugged him around his chest with one arm and around his neck with the other. This position seemed awfully similar… He had held her like this, just a few minutes ago.

“… Let go, Nino.”, she suddenly whispered, the plea in her voice obvious, “… Let go, I’ll hold you. You’ve put yourself aside for long enough… Please, please let it loose.”

Just like that he answered. He buried his face even deeper on her shoulder and began screaming.

 

* * *

 

He hadn’t stopped for a good hour.

His voice was hoarse and sounding raw by now and his eyes were dry of crying. He couldn’t get out another teardrop, even if he had wanted. His entire body was convulsing in painfully dry sobs and his fingers desperately clawed into Alya’s shirt, clenching his fists in the soft fabric. He feared he might have ripped it in his breakdown.

He hadn’t once lifted his head off of her shoulder and she had held him the entire time. Her sisters had checked on them at one point but Alya had sent them away again, much to his relief.

Right now, the boy was trying to calm down again. The screaming and crying had taken their toll on him and he was utterly and completely exhausted. His eyelids were drooping and not one single muscle was still functional. Just doing so much as lifting a hand was wearing him out.

Alya had begun stroking his hair again and was whispering soothing things now that she had noticed he was trying to breathe more evenly.

She waited until his breath had calmed down until she dared pulling away. He whined a bit and tried to follow her to bury his face in her shoulder again but she gently held him back on his shoulders and smiled.

“Just a second, Nino. Okay? Just a tiny second.”

She got up and grabbed her glasses again, briefly looked after her sisters, stole a shirt from her father’s drawer and then took care to stay out of his view as she quickly pulled off the shirt to put on a new one herself. Her shirt was ruined. Well, it wasn’t ripped anywhere but it was crinkled and probably distorted from all the pulling he had done. She got a new one out of her drawer, threw it over and then returned to the bed. Nino warily blinked up to her and she managed a smile, brushing through his hair.

“Can you sit up?”

He huffed as an answer and she wrinkled her nose.

“Don’t you talk to me like that, Mister.”, he shot her a sleepy look and she nodded, “Yes, sit up, you’re not falling asleep on me with that shirt on. Especially not in my bed. C’mon, let’s get you changed, then you can sleep.”

He whined but she shook her head.

“I’ll help you, come on.”, she locked her arms around his upper body and got him in a sitting position after a few tries, quickly pulling off his shirt and trying to put on her father’s before he’d collapse back onto the mattress again. She barely managed but in the end a very sleepy and whiny Nino laid on her bed, making weak grabby hands in her direction. She sighed, grabbed his phone and let him unlock it (after a whole lot of bribing to please concentrate? It’s just four numbers, Nino!) and sent his mother a quick message saying he’ll probably stay away until after dinner.

Then she put her glasses next to his again, grabbed a light blanket and laid down next to him, pulling the blanket over them and snuggling as close as they had been before, just that it was her resting her face in the crook of his neck this time.

He contently hummed as he felt her in his arms again, his fingers twitching in an attempt to hug her tighter than he was right now but after just a minute of lying like that he entirely slumped and was fast asleep. His breath was quiet with a slight rattling noise because of his raw throat but calm and even nonetheless.

Alya snuggled closer to him, savoring the wonderful mixed scent of the boy next to her and of her father which came from the shirt.

Slowly, her eyes drooped close as well, but not without entangling their legs and pressing a small kiss to his collarbone. And just as she slipped off to sleep a little smile danced around the corners of Nino’s mouth.


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A hero is shaped and another is desperately needed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much!  
> Oh my gosh, you all sent me so good reviews and I really love answering your question, never stop sending them! <3  
> Well, that's honestly it for the notes ;D  
> You all know my tumblr and you all know my prompt list, the offer still stands and-... Yeah :D  
> Enjoy~

Adrien slowly lowered his phone. He had heard Nino wincing but it had been muffled.

Was he-… Crying? Nino, crying?

The blonde warily ran a hand through his hair and sighed, placing the phone on his nightstand before slumping into his pillow.  
His thoughts ran at lightspeed and he couldn’t even grasp it all.

Ladybug was dead, yeah, apparently. He knew Marinette was not to blame for and he knew, _he knew_ he shouldn’t be acting like that. He shouldn’t be so-… So selfish.

But he was and not even he himself knew _why_.

It irritated and frustrated him by now and he knew Ladybug would’ve never acted like that. So why did he let her down like that? Why did he dare to hurt others so much, why didn’t he notice before and when did he start being so-… So unfocused, so idiotic and most of all, so ignorant?

He had almost always been the one to care for the akumatized victims, he had left the media to Ladybug and had comforted the victims and assured them that everything was back to normal.

When did he start being so rash and-… heartless?

The answer was easy but the reason seemed even more selfish.

Since Ladybug’s death.

And it-… Shocked him, to say the least. He groaned.

It disgusted him, even.

Ladybug had always been such a kind soul, sure she had had her ways with things she didn’t like but she had proven to be able to learn. She had always stood proud and tall and no matter how scared she had been she had always put others above that and had defeated whatever came their way. And he just-… Disappointed her like that. He dared letting her down like that, he ignored what she had left for him and just-… Cared for himself.

He ignored the good example she had set for him.

Of course she hadn’t been perfect but she had always strived to be better. She had always tried to be a better version of her past with each and every Akuma.

And what had he become?

Since Marinette’s Akuma he had blamed her for everything. For the miserable condition he was in, for his exhaustion, for getting akumatized, for Ladybug’s death.

And none of it had actually been her fault. He sniffled and buried his face deeper in the pillow. His insides clenched at the thought of what he had put Marinette through.

What had he done?

“Hey kid?”, a high voice ripped him out of his thoughts, making him jump a little but then he relaxed.

“… Plagg?”

“Where’s cheese?”

Adrien sighed and pointed to his desk. Of course the tiny god wouldn’t want to talk to him…

“Plagg?”

A muffled munching came from the direction where he had pointed. Then a big gulp and Plagg’s voice piped up again.

“Yeah?”

Adrien rolled over and sat up, rubbing over his face before facing the little, black Kwami.

“Do you think I’m a bad Chat Noir?”

“You’re a Chat Noir like all the others.”, Plagg cackled and Adrien rolled his eyes.

“That’s not a very nice answer…”, he mumbled and wanted to drown himself in his sheets again but the tiny god suddenly flew right in front of his face. Adrien recoiled and jumped back, clutching his heart.

“Jesus, Plagg! Don’t scare me like that!”

The Kwami just narrowed his eyes and crossed his tiny paws before flying closer to Adrien’s face again.

“Listen here, kid. I said you’re a Chat Noir like all the others. You’re human. You’re allowed to make mistakes, you’re allowed to fail and you’re certainly allowed to mourn. Heroes are not born, heroes are shaped. Through a whole lot of work and yes, failures. But do you know what really makes a hero worth carrying this ring?”

Adrien gulped and shook his head. The Kwami narrowed his eyes even more.

“A hero worth carrying my Miraculous is a human who can fail. Who can endure pain and loss and everything, who can be at the lowest. But what really makes this human a hero is standing up again. Standing up for their own mistakes, for others and most importantly for the innocent. For the ones who are suffering the most. And nothing, kid, nothing can make a human become a hero but themselves. Because I can’t straighten your knees, I can’t tell you what to do. Not with your duty as a hero. That’s your thing. That’s your calling. And let me tell you, kid, you’re a Chat Noir like all the others because not a single chosen Chat Noir that I have been honored with looking over has not been a hero. Not a single one. And you won’t be the first to fail yourself, is that understood?”

He jabbed his paw into the tip of Adrien’s nose and the blonde hurriedly nodded.

“O-Okay…?”

“I’ve seen you be a great Chat Noir so far. You have proven to be able to carry this duty and you have never given up. You have been at your lowest and you have experienced what it really means to lose someone. You have failed and you have realized that, I know that look. So stand up already!”

Adrien bit his lip and waited for a second, then two. The tiny god remained in front of him and continued glaring at him. Obviously-… Waiting for something?

“Why-… Why haven’t you-… Said that before…?”

Plagg rolled his eyes and flew back a bit, enabling Adrien to get into a more comfortable position again.

“I already explained that, kid. I can’t just make you a hero. Sure, I can train you, I can advise you and I can explain some things to you. But in situations like this my lips are sealed. Because these are the situations in which you must prove yourself to be a human and then rise up to be a hero. You have to fall to stand up.”

The blonde furrowed his eyebrows and crossed his arms, mirroring the Kwami in front of him.

“Well, I could’ve spared Marinette from very much pain if I had realized that earlier.”

The tiny god shot him an unreadable look, then shrugged.

“Then consider yourself lucky you realized that after just a few months and not after some years.”

Plagg turned away and flew back to the desk, Adrien quickly getting up and following him with quick, angry steps.

“Hey, nuh-uh. Why didn’t you just tell me earlier that Marinette was not at fault? Plagg, that could’ve saved all of us a lot of pain!”

“I couldn’t, I already told you!”, the Kwami turned to him again, his tail uncomfortably swishing behind him, “There are no shortcuts in life, kid! I couldn’t have just flown into your face like just now and slapped that into your head. You wouldn’t have believed me, you didn’t want to believe anything else. You just lost your best friend, the girl you were swooning over for four years. Look at me and tell me openly that you would have believed me that Marinette is not at fault.”

Adrien sighed and slumped in his desk chair, rubbing over his face.

“That’s right, kiddo, you wouldn’t have. And you know it.”

“Yeah…”, he slowly admitted, “I-… I wouldn’t have…”

A breeze of his huffed breath pushed a few strands out of his face. The Kwami nodded to himself, grabbing another wedge of camembert and starting to nibble on it.

“Exactly. And now, since you’ve finally come to your senses and are able to listen, get your head out of your ass and start being a hero. Because I know you are one and I know you can do this.”

He slumped further in his chair, his eyes feeling warm from him rubbing them, trying not to cry. His friend was right… All his friends were right.

Ladybug was dead and he had to stand up and finally see, how miserable Marinette had become…

He owed it to Ladybug. He owed it to his duty.

And most importantly, he owed it to himself.

 

* * *

 

“… T-… Tikki?”

“Marinette.”, a tiny voice replied, just barely audible, “Marinette?”

“Tikki, Tikki, where are you?”

She tried to follow the voice repeating her name but she couldn’t see her little friend, she couldn’t feel Tikki’s warm aura anywhere.

“Marinette, Marinette!”

“I’m-… I’m trying! Tikki! Where are you?”

She started sobbing by now, dry tears flowing down her cheeks. She couldn’t see, everything was pitch black and her steps eerily echoed into nothingness.

“Tikki!”, she screamed, trying to somehow find her Kwami but despite her searching eyes and despite her swirling around, trying to locate her voice, she couldn’t find her.

“Marinette. Marinette, I’m here.”

“I-… I can’t see you! Tikki, where, where are you?! I’m gonna get you back but I gotta see you!”

The voice of the tiny goddess sighed and Marinette turned around once more, being confronted by nothing but darkness.

“Marinette. You can’t see me. But you can find me. Close your eyes.”

“Wh-What?!”, she felt her heart sinking and tried to blink against the darkness, “But-… I-… I gotta see you to find you! I-… Can’t see you if my eyes are closed!”

Tikki once again sighed and her voice seemed further away.

“Marinette. Marinette, close your eyes. Please.”

Hesitantly she closed her eyes and gulped, not even daring to breathe as a light shone up behind her closed eyelids.

“T-Tikki?”, she sniffled, squinting her eyes to keep them closed no matter what.

“Yes, Marinette, I’m here.”, the Kwami’s voice soothed and she felt a soft touch on her hand, “Keep your eyes closed. I’m here, Marinette.”

She sobbed and tried moving her fingers towards the touch, feeling a little head.

“I-… I miss you-… Tikki, I miss you s-so badly…”

“I miss you, too, Marinette.”, her friend answered in a breathy tone, her voice thick with sadness, “But you gotta keep staying strong. I know you can do it. I know you can. You’re my Ladybug, Marinette.”

The bluenette pressed her lips together but her sobs broke out regardless.

“… I-… I c-can’t do this for m-much longer, Tikki…”

Assurance swept over her as the warmth of the Kwami played on her hands.

“I know you can. Marinette. Marinette, I know you can.”

“Where-… Where are you, Tikki?”

“I’m right here.”, the tiny goddess answered, something hugging her finger, “I’m here, I’m right here with you.”

Marinette slowly moved her fingers to softly cup Tikki’s body on her finger, still not opening her eyes.

“Tikki-… I need you-…”, she forced out between strained breaths, desperately trying to stand still and not open her eyes, “Please Tikki… I-… I need you, I-… I need Ladybug.”

“Marinette!”, Tikki’s voice suddenly sounded like nothing more than an echo, muffled by a wall. The warmth on her fingers vanished and her hands were empty as she searched for the body. The light slowly became darker.

“T-Tikki?!”

“Marinette, you are Ladybug! You are Ladybug! Don’t lose hope! We’ll find back together!”, her voice became quieter and weaker the further she was pulled away, “You are Ladybug, Marinette, you are Ladybug!”

Marinette sobbed and tried running after Tikki’s voice but she wouldn’t move, nothing worked.

“Tikki!”

“Don’t worry, Marinette! You are Ladybug!”

She couldn’t take it anymore. Her legs began hurting and one side became irrationally cold while she tried to run, tried to follow the tiny goddess. Suddenly she felt heat around her heart and with that she opened her eyes.

 

* * *

 

The ground was wet and hard. Her legs were bent in an uncomfortable angle and her side on which she laid was soaked with cold water.

Her eyes burned as she opened them. Tikki was gone. Tikki was not here with her. She sat up and realized that she must’ve dozed away in the little alley again but a shower of rain had surprised her in her sleep. She quickly got up and pulled her jacket tighter around her shivering form, Tikki’s voice of her dream haunting her thoughts.

She had to hold out. She had to stay strong.

So she bit her lip, brushed over her nose and began her way home. If she had to hold out she wouldn’t need to be sick on top of the situation she was in. Even though she really couldn’t care less.


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> DJWifi cuddles in the rain but the calm mood is soon to be interrupted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh man, I'm honestly scared to upload this... You guys're probably gonna lynch me :D  
> Anyway, again thank you all so much for sticking with me on this story, it really means a lot to me <3  
> Also, please don't kill me. Please. Help.

Alya stood close by Nino’s side as they waited for Marinette to come to school. It was rainy, had been since days, they both wore rain coats and Nino held an umbrella for both of them. She leant against him as the rain only became worse.

“Do you think she’ll come at all?”, Alya sniffled, burying her chin further in the collar of her jacket. It wasn’t exactly cold but the rain soaked her legs and the wind didn’t really help.

“Yeah, I think she’ll come. After all she hasn’t missed that many days since-… It happened.”

Alya nodded warily, quietly sighing.

“Yeah… Of course…”

Nino wrapped an arm around her shoulders and she felt his warmth seeping through the thin material of his rain coat.

“Hey, it’ll be okay. We’ll just stop her before she can enter the school, talk to her and then everything will be better. We’ll get through this.”

Alya inconspicuously turned her head a little more to him, just to feel the warm breeze of his perfume brush over her face. She closed her eyes for a second, just a second, to breathe in and enjoy his wonderfully mossy scent. The second became two and she turned her head a little more. Another second later Nino’s soft voice ripped her from her trance, a light chuckle going through his chest and escaping his lips.

“Are you tired?”

That’d be a-… A good excuse to cuddle with him, actually. She blinked up to him and nodded, then felt his arm around her shoulders tightening and lightly sliding down to embrace her on the height of her shoulder blades, making her feel more secure and cuddled than before.

“I told you not to stay up too late. I know your thoughts start wandering then.”

She sighed and rested her head against the crook of his neck, lightly wrinkling her nose as the umbrella tilted so that her foot was in the rain. She quickly pulled her foot to stand behind the other and felt him murmur a breathy apology before adjusting the umbrella so that she’d be in the relatively protected area beneath the thin synthetic fabric.

“… Sorry…”, she mumbled, pressing her cheek against the warm exposed skin on his collarbone and neck.

He softly shrugged in response, keeping his movements small enough so that she wouldn’t be jostled too much but could still feel it.

“It’s okay.”, he smiled, his voice slightly going up at the end, almost sounding cheeky.

“I’m surprised you’re not tired, actually.”, she shot back, maybe with more sass swinging along than she had originally meant.

“Yeah… Well, I had a good nap and then I went straight to bed after getting home.”

She huffed, her fingers in her pockets lightly moving against each other to create a little warmth. Her gaze was still trained on the bakery across the street.

“You were pretty much knocked out after that…”, she mumbled, just loudly enough for him to barely hear it, “I was worried…”

His chest once again moved in a gentle laugh and she huffed, nudging him with her shoulder.

“I really was, you idiot. You seemed so exhausted when you left for home, I almost asked my Maman to drive you home.”

His chuckle died down and she felt his hand on her upper arm tightening. She listened for a few moments but didn’t get a reaction so that she leant back from her nice, warm spot on his neck and instead tried to catch his gaze. He didn’t leave her hanging for long since he looked down shortly after feeling her move and creating a cold spot on his now exposed skin.

“You-… You really were worried, huh?”

She almost snorted at that but managed to cover it with a neutral shrug, burying her face on the crook of his neck again.

“Well, of course… When you woke up your eyes were so swollen from crying you almost couldn’t see through them. I really was worried you wouldn’t make it home. If you had been less stubborn I would’ve let you stay the night.”

His breath hitched this time and she felt him tense lightly before relaxing again. His posture changed from standing on both feet to shifting his weight to the leg that was closer to her, his embrace suddenly feeling way more comfortable.

“… Huh… You would’ve talked me into that and then gotten to know Nino before school. Not a nice acquaintance, I tell ya.”

She giggled.

“Are you more one of the kind to say ‘Don’t talk to me unless I have had my coffee yet’ or more one of the sort to not talk at all?”

He snorted at that and shook his head, his stubbly chin gently scratching over her forehead. He must’ve skipped shaving today. Suddenly she realized just how much they had grown.

They all had become taller at least half a head since they got to know each other, except Marinette, she had mostly stayed as small. Maybe she’d still have a growth spurt.

The boys had definitely grown out of their chubby cheeks. The lines in Adrien’s face had become sharper, manlier over the years. He had just become more handsome when growing out of his scrawny teenage body and adorable round face. Now, an athletic young man with a perfect camera face and the set jaw the photographers loved so much stood on the place where a kinda dorky teenager had been before.

Nino hadn’t changed much at first. Sure, he had relatively quickly become taller but on his appearance, nothing had become more manly or different for two more years. Until last year, when he had come back to school from the vacation in Morocco with his parents.

The first thing that had happened was that pretty much everyone asked who stole his clothes and tried to take his place now.

He had grown to be a tall man by now, towering over Alya by a head. His face hadn’t gotten much sharper like Adrien’s but rather had become a little more-… Angular, maybe. He had gotten a bigger jaw that was a little broader shaped than the pointy, round one he had had before. His chin was more defined as well as his cheekbones and he had grown his hair out a little, keeping it in an undercut. He tried to sweep the longer hair on top back to look ‘suave’ as he had once called it but it constantly fell back into his face. His voice had also gotten a bit smoother, deeper.

And, well, he liked to shave his jaw since he tended to only grow beard on his chin and in patches on his cheeks so he normally liked it cleanly shaved. Well, looks like he didn’t have the chance to this morning… Had he been this exhausted when he had walked home yesterday?

He snorted at her question and shook his head.

“Nah, I’m more of a crocodile type.”

She broke out laughing, lifting her eyebrows as she lightly kicked against his shoe.

“And what do I have to imagine if you say things like that?”

“I’ll snap if someone gets too close.”, he grinned, gently pinching her upper arm on which he held her close to him, “Snap.”

She shook her head, genuinely laughing at him fooling around like that.

“You’re a big dork, that’s what you are.”

He smirked and his hand slipped from her arm to her side, playfully pinching her there so that she jumped.

“Hey!”, she laughed, taking a step away from him (much to her dismay, actually) and holding her hands out to keep him away, “Don’t. You. Dare.”

He cheekily grinned, hinting to another attack from which she recoiled and jumped out into the rain, then he burst out laughing.

“Eeeww, no!”, she squeaked and quickly returned to him underneath the protecting umbrella, her shoulder accidently bumping against his chest. He just chuckled and returned to their original position, softly holding her against him so she could relax again.

“Truce?”, she asked skeptically.

“Truce.”, he agreed, leaning his cheek against her forehead as she snuggled against him again. They both sighed and he gently ran his hand up and down her upper arm. She breathed in his calming scent and smiled, as she felt his heart quicken a bit when she stretched her neck to press the bridge of her nose against his exposed skin, closing her eyes.

His hand briefly stilled but then resumed its slow and calming path up and down her arm.

“You warm?”, he quietly asked, his voice softly drumming against her nose. She smiled and nodded before pulling one of her hands out of her pocket. She pushed away the zipper of his open raincoat to snake her arm around his waist inside the rain coat, seeking some of his warmth that the synthetic fabric held in. Her palm brushed over the soft material of his shirt and she sighed contently, her arm around him tightening a little bit.

He hummed and she could almost hear the smirk in his voice, as well as a light shiver.

“Enjoying waiting here?”

If he had meant to tease her, she wouldn’t give it to him. Because she genuinely enjoyed waiting here with him. Even if Marinette wouldn’t come anymore or if the bell would ring before they’d see her, she just enjoyed standing here, exchanging warmth with him and talking about nonsense.

She had seen Nino in a different light ever since Animan, but they had just been really good friends with a hint of teasing, just a touch of romance.

But secretly, Alya had fallen, not really fast, but she had mostly had eyes for him since then, if she was completely honest.

Up until now.

Now she realized what she really had with him and she loved him for that. Well, she-… Probably didn’t love him… Yet? She didn’t know, actually.

Alya had never been the type to be interested in long lasting or overly affectionate relationships. To be honest, Marinette had been the first real friend to her who she had hugged and touched every day. Between the two it had been normal to pat on each other’s shoulders or poke or even brush through the other’s hair. They had often enough fallen asleep on top of each other and Marinette had sent them tumbling down or falling over a flight of stairs, causing them to end up on top of each other. And, well, they had told each other everything.

Marinette had been her first friendship in which she had really been swathed.

Before Alya had come to lyceé she hadn’t had many friends, none of them had been really close either. She had rather been in a group of friends, sometimes hanging out with them but not really often outside of school. She had also been in a relationship once but it hadn’t held for longer than two months and they hadn’t even really been together, it had been more of a-… She didn’t know, more of an elementary school relationship. They had held hands, well, kissed three or four times and had mostly met up to talk about the same show they liked. If anything, it had been more of a closer friendship but not even nearly as close as Marinette’s and hers.

She had had two more relationships over the last four years, one as short as her first with someone from another class. Marinette had squealed for hours when Alya had finally told her she was seeing someone, a few days after they started dating. The other had actually almost held five months and again, she had been the one to break up, as she had done in the two other relationships.

In each one she hadn’t exactly been the most dedicated girlfriend. Well, yes, she had met up with her partners, she had kissed them and had cuddled with them and had gone out with them on movie or dinner dates and all that but her real passion had always laid in her friendship to Marinette, Nino and Adrien as well as her Ladyblog.

Needless to say that none of her partners had really been disappointed or sad when she had broken up. Her relationships had always sorta died down after the first few weeks of wearing the rose-colored glasses.

But now with Nino she wasn’t sure anymore. Suddenly she felt something she had never really felt with the others. She really wanted to be with him and even of it meant not having a relationship with him. She just wanted him to be there for her, she just wanted to be there for him and she wanted him around, touch him, be able to hug him and to tell him everything she needed to get off her chest.

Because of that she wasn’t entirely sure if she loved him. Or, well, had really fallen in love with him. Was it really being in love with someone when she just wanted him with her, no matter if it was a relation- or a friendship?

She sighed and snuggled closer against him. These were confusing thoughts, she should really focus on just cuddling him…

“Hey, you okay?”, he tried again to get her attention. She lightly recoiled at the sudden break of silence and embarrassedly realized she hadn’t answered his first question.

“Uh, yeah, of course, sorry. I like waiting here with you.”, she made a dismissing wave with her hand and hid her blush from him on the folds of his shirt, “Uh… I was just-… Lost in thoughts, sorry…”

He smiled and pressed a kiss to her forehead, something she had grown quite accustomed to when he had started doing that, around a week after the Animan attack.

She closed her eyes, resting her head against the soft touch of his lips and quietly sighing.

“It’s alright.”, he murmured, breathing against her skin, “Don’t worry, really.”

She was about to respond to him as the bell sounded. Marinette had not shown up yet but the lessons started. She parted from him, worriedly biting her lip and beginning to shiver.

“What-… What if something happened?”, she fearfully asked, her hand around his waist forming into a fist and her fingers trapping the fabric between them, lightly pulling, “Nino, what if-… What if we’re too late, what if-…”

He quickly turned to her, hugging her tightly.

“No. Nonono. Don’t think like that. Marinette would never. I’m sure she’s just late. You know she has a tendency to be late to school.”

“But-… But not lately! She had always already been there and she wasn’t in front of the classroom and that means-”

He sighed and cut her off by gently shushing her with a finger on her lips.

“Marinette is going to be fine. She’s alright, I promise. Now let’s get to the lesson and wait for her there. We’ll find another time to speak to her.”

Her breath hitched and her insides clenched. She just wanted to go into the bakery and look after Marinette. Maybe something terrible happened. Maybe-…

She shivered.

_No, Nino’s right, nothing happened. She’s probably just late_ , she thought to herself, lowering her gaze to fixate his collarbone.

_It’s alright… Right?_

He softly squeezed her shoulder and nudged her to go and enter the schoolyard, leading her to the classroom upstairs. Her gaze didn’t break from the bakery as soon as it vanished behind the walls of the school and even then, she wouldn’t look ahead. Nino kept his arm around her shoulders and pulled her close to him to navigate through the students hurrying to get to their classroom and helped her up the stairs to their classroom.

Alya looked up again, hoping against hope that as soon as she could look over the floor Marinette would appear in her view, sitting against the wall, hair falling into her face. Just a few more steps.

She took last step that kept her view from levelling with the upper floor and instantly, her heart shattered. Marinette was nowhere to be seen.

“She’s-… She’s not here…”, Alya murmured, already feeling her chest deflating and her heart sinking, “She’s not-… Not here…”

Nino sighed and squeezed her shoulder again, shaking his head.

“No, she isn’t. But I’m certain she’s okay. Just late, Alya, just late.”

Miss Bustier just unlocked the classroom as they took the last step to stand on the upper floor and their class filed in after the teacher. Nino helped her up to her seat and brushed over her hand, then briefly whispered with Adrien and after that, went up to Miss Bustier, asking her something.

She nodded and he sat down next to Alya, putting his bag underneath the table. She sent him a questioning gaze.

“What’re you doing?”

“Getting ready for the lesson.”, he cheekily replied, knowing full well his vague answer would annoy her. And right on cue, he saw her rolling her eyes out of the corners of his eyes.

“No shit, smartass. But what’re you doing next to me?”

He smirked, putting his tablet on the table and only then he turned to her, grinning smugly.

“What, don’t like my company?”

She sighed and rubbed over her face.

“Nino, seriously, what are you doing? Why are you ditching Adrien?”

His expression now changed from smugly to serious and he took her hand, beginning to play with her fingers.

“Alya, I’m worried about you. I don’t want you to be alone today. And Adrien can sit on his own for a day.”

The blonde now turned around while still sitting on his desk and nodded up to her, smiling. He had overheard their conversation.

“Don’t worry, Alya.”, he assured her, “I’ll be okay. You need Nino today.”

She turned to the boy next to her again and tried a grateful smile while tears began pooling in her eyes, her fingers tightening around his.

“Thank you, Nino.”, she leant forward and gave him a little peck on his cheek, smiling as their gazes met again.

He gulped lightly, his free hand coming up to brush over his cheek, then he grinned goofily.

“Heh, uh, no problem!”

She didn’t get to respond since Miss Bustier started the lesson and she had to concentrate on not letting her worries for Marinette come in the way of learning, even if she didn’t really succeed.

But sure enough she struggled with that and at the end, she finally gave up. Their teacher droned on about some literature piece that they’d have to read until the summer break while Alya drowned in worry for Marinette.

Did something happen? Where was she? Had she even been home for the night? Alya knew she drank at night and she knew she had spent more than one night on the streets.

Had she been attacked again?

The brunette was this close to letting go of Nino’s hand, pointing up and asking for a toilet break to go ask Sabine where Marinette was when a certain bluenette barged into the classroom.

Marinette panted and tried to catch her breath, obviously she had run way more than just from the bakery to school. There were several stains on her clothes and she seemed exhausted and scared. Just as her bangs swung away from her face as she leant over, Alya could see a tiny tinge of something glistening red. A liquid.

Blood?

“S-Sorry I’m late, Miss Bustier. It won’t happen again.”, she replied in a heavy voice, her breaths coming in short pants.

Nino’s fingers around Alya’s tightened as he felt her twitching, wanting to get up in the middle of the lesson. There was another time and another place to talk to her, not now.

“It’s alright, Marinette. Sit down, please.”

She obediently nodded, keeping her gaze down as she ascended the stairs up to her seat in the back, ignoring Chloé’s snarl.

Alya turned around to look after her as she sat down and set her bag to her feet, her hand in Nino’s calming down again. He was right, it wasn’t the right time. But why was Marinette hurt?

She sighed and faced the front again just as the bluenette looked up again, not wanting to get caught staring. Marinette had gotten enough stares over the past months…

Just a few seconds later they heard a few voices underneath the window, shouting and coming closer. Alya listened up as well as everyone in the class, even Miss Bustier stopped her speech and walked up to the window, wanting to know what the ruckus was about.

“Where did she go?!”, one of the voices shouted, obviously enraged. Alya froze, as well as Nino, already regretting that the classroom had become ghostly silent.

“I dunno! Maybe that way!”

“We’ll get that bitch!”

“Let’s go!”

Alya gulped and tore her gaze away from the window to turn to Nino, his face drained of color and just as shocked as hers. Their gazes simultaneously shifted up between Ivan and Nathaniel, landing on Marinette. She shrunk on her seat, seemingly curling into herself, her face hidden by her dark blue bangs.

“Come on, come on, we don’t have much time left! The police are only giving us that much of a headstart to get away after we beat her up!”

Another voice cackled.

“Rene’s cousin is giving us all the time in the world, and they won’t sue us if they find a dead body. They’ll probably say she’s committed suicide!”

All of them laughed before one of them spoke up again.

“Now c’mon, I assume she went that way!”

The footsteps sounded up again and they ran down a street away from the school, the noises slowly dying down.

Marinette didn’t say a word as everyone looked up to her, shocked and disbelieving.

After some more moments of silence Miss Bustier tried to break the frozen state of her students, shakily piping up in a weak voice.

“Yes, anyway... I-… I think you all could use a break. Go catch some fresh air, please.”

It was obvious she wanted Marinette to stay since her gaze was fixated on the bluenette in the back of the classroom, so all of the class got up without a word and left quickly. Nino hurriedly pulled Alya outside and closed the door after her as the last, then she slumped in his arms.


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One by one, they are finally opening their eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am relatively unhappy with how the chapter came out but there was a lot going on in my life in the past days so I'm sorry if it doesn't feel genuine or if there are mistakes but I can't do it better right now. I may re-write it and update it with the next chapter, let's see :)  
> Anyway, I got good news as well! A friend of mine actually wrote an ending to Breeze and she uploaded it! That's so amazing and I feel so honored!! *-*  
> Her name's princesskitomi on tumblr and Jewel Princess Armelia on fanfiction.net and her story is named "My Intake on Breeze", please go check it out, it's really awesome!  
> "My Intake on Breeze" -> https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12658702/1/My-Intake-on-Breeze  
> So, I hope the chapter is not too bad. I'd really like to know what you're thinking about it so I can maybe improve it.

The hallway was silent while the class stared at the door.

Nobody had fathomed it could get as far. They had always thought what they did to her had been enough as a punishment, silent glares and ignoring her a bit until it would be over. Until they’d either graduate or it laid back long enough.

Of course they had noticed other classes calling Marinette names, of course they had seen her injuries from a few attacks on her. Of course they had known what had happened out there.

But they hadn’t cared. They thought she’d pull through and a tiny, little part of them had felt satisfaction. Disgusting, unjustified satisfaction.

Slowly, all gazes went from the door to each other, everyone mustering the others.

That’s when they saw. They had never been better than these voices outside. The guys trying to kill Marinette. They had never been better than anyone else trying to make Marinette even more miserable.

They had seen themselves as merciful, for not calling her out for what she did, for not hitting her and for not actively doing anything to her. They had seen themselves as tolerating her but they had never been better than anyone trying to actively hurt her. Because they had done just that.

Their once beloved classmate, the sweet girl they had all known, their class president for four years, they had hurt her more than anyone by not being there for her.

One after another, the gazes became wet and were cast down. The guilt suddenly weighed down on them, feeling loud and unbearable. The silence was broken by their dismay.

They could almost hear their facades shattering. And one after another slowly looked up again, more and more gazes landing on Nino who held Alya close, whispering encouraging things to her while she shivered.

He had always known. He had always known how miserable Marinette had been and he had never stopped trying to make them see.

Now that they finally understood what they had done they sought for his help. Now that they finally saw how wrong their behavior had been they felt like he was their only chance to make things better again.

Nino didn’t notice right away that he was silently chosen as a leader. He was busy trying to calm Alya before she’d break down, desperately brushing over her back and firmly pressing his cheek against her forehead, murmuring they’d get through this and they’d be able to help Marinette. Trying to tell her to stay positive and that they’d surely get a chance at breaking through to Marinette, finally setting things right. Much to his relief she started breathing more evenly and the shivering stopped.

Then he looked up and almost recoiled at everyone but Chloé looking at him.

“Uh…”, he forced out, furrowing his eyebrows, “… Guys?”

They remained silent for another moment, nobody daring to speak up until Rose, sweet Rose took a step forward.

“We-… We need to-… To do something…”, she shakily clarified, a few nods following her speech.

Nino looked around, his hand on Alya’s neck lightly beginning to tremble. She noticed and looked up as well now, her arms around him tightening.

“So now you wanna help?”, Nino asked, his eyes narrowing. The class gulped and stayed silent until Ivan groaned.

“Yes. They wanna kill her. As much as we all miss Ladybug, nobody should go as far and kill because of that.”

Nino stayed skeptical, a bitter taste suddenly spreading in his mouth.

“I wanna hear it. From all of you. Before you guys do anything I wanna hear Marinette is not guilty. If you just wanna help her because you don’t want her killed that’s no helping. So say it. Each of you.”

Some gazes went down but Nathaniel finally spoke up, squaring his thin shoulders.

“She’s not guilty. Has never been. Miss Fortune killed Ladybug and I was shocked that Marinette was capable of doing this but it wasn’t her. Just as much as I wasn’t Evillustrator. It was her bad feelings. Whatever akumatized her, it must’ve been so powerful that she was heartbroken. It was not her fault.”, he glared at the others, “I say that we’ll help her because she’s innocent.”

Chloe huffed at that but Mylène nodded.

“Yeah. We were self-centered for long enough. I don’t wanna do that any longer.”

More and more spoke up until only Chloé, Kim, Alix and Adrien remained silent. Alya turned out of Nino’s arms and looked at Alix, silently nodding at her.

“What about you?”, she asked, her voice still weak and her shoulders still lightly trembling but her eyes firmly trained on the small girl.

Alix bit her lip and rubbed the back of her head. It had never been a strength of her to admit a mistake.

“I-… I say Marinette is not guilty. We should help her.”

“Y-Yeah, it was-… Wrong of us to-… To treat her like that…”, Kim followed her suit, not wanting to stay behind Alix for too long.

Nino breathed through, briefly closing his eyes and then opening them again as the class quieted down.

“I’m-… I’m disappointed in all of you. Yeah, sure, I believe you that you changed your minds and I’d be really happy if you changed your behavior towards her now but seriously, guys, it needed a death threat against her for you to see how miserable she’s been? I mean, seriously? I told you over and over that she’s innocent, that it was her Akuma and not herself. I told you. And only now, after months of ignoring her, of ignoring me, you finally come crawling to me?”

He sighed as their shoulders slumped and rubbed over his face, then he felt Alya’s hand on his chest. He looked down to her and she gently cupped his face.

“Better than them realizing they’ve been wrong when we watch Marinette’s coffin being lowered into the ground.”, she gently said, her voice shaking but her eyes determined. The same expression he had seen so often on her, the same expression he had longed to see until yesterday when she had finally put it on again.

“But-… But it’s so-…”

“I know.”, she quietly interrupted him, “But Nino, let them make it up to Mari again. I only started thinking about how wrong I’ve been because I realized she was drinking. Sometimes, it just needs such a push. And they’ve had this push now. Please, just let them make it up to her. It can only help and that’s all Marinette needs right now.”

He held her gaze for a few seconds, then sighed again and nodded.

“I-… I suppose you’re right.”

Alya smiled and brushed over his cheek again before turning back to the class. Nino looked up as well and studied the faces around him. They seemed genuinely guilty for how they had acted. His hand on Alya’s shoulder slightly tightened and he breathed through.

“Alright… So… We gotta do this slowly. I know all of you want to make it up to her again.”, his eyes searched them and he only continued as they nodded, “But she’s been alone the past months. She won’t trust you if you suddenly hug her. She’ll rather be scared than relieved. So please, be considerate and just try acting a bit more open to her, okay? Stopping the glares will do the trick for now. Maybe shoot her a smile, maybe hold open a door for her or other things. She needs to see you’ve changed before you can talk to her.”

“But if we don’t act now she may be in danger to life. We can’t do it as slowly as you’re saying.”, Max pointed out.

“Yeah, but do you want her to trust you?”, he retorted, lifting his eyebrows, “Listen, guys, I’ll do my best to keep her safe. Keep an eye on her, try to convince her to stay inside and walk to school and home with her. That’s my job because she already knows I don’t think she’s at fault. Even if she doesn’t really realize that… But you just can’t do that yet. She’d be skeptical and maybe intimidated. She could think you’re trying to hurt her again, all she does is protecting herself right now. Please, just don’t confront her.”

A few nods encouraged him to continue.

“Okay, so, just do what I said and you can slowly approach her. I just-… I just don’t want her to be even more scared than she already has to be…”

Again, the class nodded and he breathed through again, his gaze going down to Alya. She smiled at him and he couldn’t help but smile back, relief finally flooding his mind and a breeze of his freeing sigh brushing through Alya’s hair.

“So… Let’s get our Mari back?”, he tried and she stood up on her tiptoes, pressing a small kiss to his cheek.

“Yeah. Let’s get our Mari back.”

Nino grinned until his gaze landed on Adrien who was still staring at the floor, obviously fighting with himself. He would still have a lot to do.

 

* * *

 

Caline Bustier breathed through as she propped herself up on her desk.

Yes, sure, dealing with Marinette had been very difficult in the past months, especially dealing with her professionally, as a teacher, since her own feelings had gotten in the way of that. Ladybug had been a role model to many of her students and teaching a class in which the murderer of said superhero was seated had proved to be really straining. Both to do and to watch. She had honestly feared that if she would ask Marinette to say something lesson-related that Chloé would once again pester her with another snarky comment.

In the first weeks it had of course been her own feelings that had kept her from performing her guidance counselor duties. Of course she had been shocked, of course she had mourned Ladybug’s death since the superhero had kept them all safe. And it was self-explanatory that she had not really known what to do with Marinette. How to deal with the reputation she suddenly had.

Caline had never really blamed her. She knew how it was to be akumatized and she had often enough talked about it with students who had not been able to deal with it.

She was the guidance counselor after all and many students had not been able to cope with what they had done.

But having to live with everyone blaming her instead of her Akuma to have killed Ladybug? Caline could not fathom how much that was weighing down on the girl.

She took another deep breath and looked up to the girl in the back of the classroom. Marinette was curled into herself and had her feet up on the bench while leaning her knees against the desk and burying her face in her thighs. Caline walked around the teacher’s desk and ascended the stairs up to the back, slowly sitting down next to her student.

“… Marinette?”

The girl recoiled but didn’t change her position. Caline softly placed a hand on her shoulder, feeling her jump once again but still, she didn’t look up.

“Marinette, they were after you, weren’t they…?”, she tried again and this time, she got a reaction. The bluenette nodded reluctantly, shivers running down her spine at her teacher’s soothing voice.

“They-… They wanted…”

“… To kill me.”, she spoke up, finishing the sentence Caline didn’t want to say out loud. She nodded and sighed.

“… Do your parents know about this?”

Again, her student shook her head and Caline gulped. If not even her parents were trustworthy persons to her anymore…

“Do you wanna stay here for a bit?”

Marinette gave a humorless snort and shrugged helplessly.

“Well, I don’t have much of a choice, do I?”, she murmured.

“… Do you want me to stay with you? Or is there anything I can do to help you?”, she slowly asked, her tongue heavy with guilt. She should’ve asked her a long time ago already.

Marinette stiffened under her hand and tightened her grip around her legs, her voice coming out quietly and weakly.

“I-… I dunno… I-…”, she stammered, “Is-… Is that okay?”

Caline was taken aback by her question. Has she really become that insecure to ask if it was okay to accept help? Has she really become that unsure to ask a guidance counselor for help?

She hesitated with her answer, now suddenly doubt pooling in her stomach. Did Marinette only accept help from her because it was her job? Because she officially had to ask?

“Of course it is okay. Marinette, of course it is okay.”, she wrapped her arm around the student and pulled her closer, the girl letting it happen without complaint. After just a few minutes of staying in that position Marinette unhooked her legs from the desk and turned towards her teacher, burying her face on her shoulder and slowly beginning to sniffle.

Caline brushed over her back and sighed, noting in her mind to talk to Marinette’s parents.

 

* * *

 

When they were finally allowed back in the lesson was almost over. Nino’s hand around Alya’s lightly tightened when their gazes fell onto Marinette. She didn’t sit as sunken together as before and apparently, she was in a better condition now. Alya unwillingly broke her gaze from the girl at the end of the classroom and looked at Nino, their gazes locking as he noticed.

Finally, they had a chance.

The brunette already directed her steps towards Marinette but Miss Bustier asked the class to pack their things and leave early into the break. But Alya didn’t care. She continued her path up to the bluenette, wanting to finally sort things out. Nino gulped but he knew he couldn’t hold her back like he could with the class. Miss Bustier caught his gaze and he slowly nodded, promising her to keep both girls calm and the situation under control. The teacher nodded back, leaving the room with the class and then, they were alone.

Marinette looked up to see Alya ascending the stairs with Nino and felt panic rising in her throat but she willed herself to stay calm.


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If only it was so easy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's so late.  
> I tried bringing it out faster but I had a lot of stuff going on that took longer than I thought they would take and thus the late update. I'm still working on chapter 18 so no worries, that'll be edited as well.  
> Sorry the chapter is so short but at least it's really heavy ;)  
> Also, shoutout to my friend orangebunnit on tumblr! She promoted me with really amazing drawings of my prompts, please go check her out on tumblr, she's an amazing person and you won't regret it! Her art is really outstanding! :)  
> Orangebunnit -> https://orangebunnit.tumblr.com/  
> (And no, orange, this is not the surprise I was talking about :P)  
> Enjoy~

Alya breathed through as she came to a halt in front of Marinette’s desk. The bluenette had caught her gaze before but had lowered her eyes again. Nino stayed behind, thank god, to let the two girls sort this out alone.

Marinette fiddled with the hem of her shirt, trying not to panic as her former best friend approached her. She didn’t know what Alya wanted and she didn’t know how she would respond to her. Alya really hadn’t done anything else than ignoring her, she hadn’t sent her any glares or had called her names. His made it very hard to try and read her.

On the inside, Marinette screamed.

After the conversation with Miss Bustier she felt much better but she was still distraught about what the guys following her were capable of, killing her in her own name. And while Miss Bustier had been able to relatively calm her in being there for her, in promising her to speak with her parents, having Alya approaching her like that was terrifying. She didn’t lift her gaze as the brunette kneeled down in front of her desk and placed her lower arms on the wooden surface to balance herself. She tried so hard to keep her tears in because tears had always meant glares in the past.

“… M-Marinette?”, she finally heard Alya say, hoarsely and hesitant.

Marinette just shook her head, not wanting to be seen, not wanting to be hurt anymore.

Alya sighed and fought against her own tears, briefly brushing over her cheeks to make sure there was no liquid flowing down. To her relief her cheeks were still dry.

“I-…”, Alya began again and the bluenette finally shot a glance up to her before looking back into her lap, “… I-… I’m s-so sorry…”

She whispered while saying that. Marinette gulped and glanced up a second time, seeing Alya’s eyes shining with tears. She sharply breathed in but didn’t say anything and didn’t lower her gaze.

Alya still lived in the belief that Ladybug was dead. She still thought Marinette’s Akuma had killed her and yet, yet she still came to her, to say she was sorry. Sorry for what? Why didn’t she demand an apology from her, for Ladybug’s murder?

Well, Marinette knew the truth. She knew she didn’t need to apologize for murdering Ladybug but for misunderstanding Alya. For doubting their friendship. For listening to Chloé.

And yet, yet still Alya came to her and asked for forgiveness.

Marinette blinked in disbelief, her jaw slowly unclenching from the tension.

In that moment, the girl didn’t care if it was an apology for how these guys treated her of how the rest of the class and her father treated her or if it really was for Alya’s behavior over the last months. Because she couldn’t fathom her having to apologize for that. Of course it had been unfair towards Marinette but she knew why Alya had reacted like that.

She knew why all of them reacted like that. If she had to live in the belief that someone had murdered Chat Noir she probably wouldn’t have reacted any differently. All of them had acted human. All of them had had their reasons to be upset, to be upset with her, with Miss Fortune, with Hawkmoth.

All of them had lost somebody important and if Marinette was being completely honest, she would’ve even treated Adrien that way if his Akuma had killed Chat Noir, or at least told everyone to have done so.

And yet.

Yet.

Alya came to her, apologizing even though she had honestly done nothing wrong. Even though she had reacted as anybody had reacted. Hurt, lost, unbelieving.

Her hazel-greenish eyes pleadingly looked at Marinette, longing for an answer, as the bluenette snapped out of her dumbstruck thoughts. But she didn’t have one. She didn’t have an answer and it upset her because of all the things she had expected, an apology from Alya had definitely not been one.

“For-… For w-what…?”, Marinette finally choked out, her voice sounding thick and quiet.

Alya sighed and looked back to Nino who stood a step beneath Marinette’s desk. He replied by sending her an encouraging smile and the girl turned back to her

“I-… I acted like a complete bitch these last months… What-… What I did was-…”, she fought for the words to come out the right way, to not be twisted or turned, “… I was hurt but-… I should have realized way sooner that-… that it hadn’t been you but-…”

She groaned frustrated and briefly let her head fall to the desk, then she sat up straighter again, once again catching Marinette’s unbelieving gaze.

“I was-… I shouldn’t have put Ladybug above you, I-… I should’ve stood by you and-… And tried to be the friend you needed, I-… I should have been more considerate and-… And I don’t want you to-… To suffer like this anymore because-… W-Well, I-…”

“You-… You’re sorry…”, Marinette whispered, suddenly even paler than before, “You’re sorry.”, she repeated.

Alya nodded and grabbed one edge of the table to steady herself, her knuckles turning white from the tension.

“Yeah. I’m sorry. I sh-shouldn’t have-”

“You’re sorry.”, Marinette interrupted her again, her gaze turning from disbelieving to shocked, “Y-… You’re sorry…”

This was too much. It was a flood of emotions that she wasn’t used to anymore since she had always held them off in the last months. Emotions meant glares. She-… She didn’t want glares.

“… Marinette…?”, Nino now tried and she suddenly realized just how much he had done for her. How much he had held off for her, how hard he had tried while she had slipped deeper into the downwards spiral.

She hadn’t even noticed how much he had been there for her. How much he had tried to help her.

This was too much. It was way too much. Her eyes widened and she pushed herself away from the desk, shaking her head. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to accept the apology, it wasn’t that she wasn’t glad that it finally looked differently but it was just too much.

Too many emotions rushing in on her while she tried to keep her walls up. Marinette didn’t know what to do but run. She jumped up, still propping herself up on the desk, her eyes wide and her breaths getting faster.

Alya slowly stood up, confused and careful, while stretching out a calming hand.

“Marinette, I-…”

“… Y-… You’re apologizing…”, she mumbled again, straightening up, “… You’re-…”

“Marinette, stay calm, ple-”

She cut Nino off by hurriedly running down the stairs, bolting out of the room and dashing into the school yard.

Nino and Alya exchanged one glance before running after her, the fear that these men would come back and that Marinette was too shocked to think straight overtaking their bodies. Just as they exited the classroom they saw a glimpse of blue hair vanishing outside of the school, down the stairs.

“Marinette!”, Alya yelled, “Wait! WAIT!”

Nino took down the stairs onto the school yard after her, pushing past the students in the break to get to Marinette before the men would come back. The girl in front of him had it easier since she was smaller than him so she was on the school entrance quicker than him.

They didn’t notice the blonde boy sneaking away as they reached the school entrance.

“PLEASE, WAIT!!”, she yelled, almost tripping when she tried to dash after the bluenette. She had always known Marinette was fast, but _this_ fast?

She ran around the corner of the school building down the street, luckily choosing the opposite side of where the voices vanished. Just when Alya thought it was safe for them to just run after her, though, a group of men with baseball bats ran past them.

“C’mon! I saw her!”

“We’ll get her!”

Alya already felt tears welling up in her eyes and was ready to throw up as one shot her a grin.

“Don’t worry, we’ll take care of this!”

The two teenagers tried to take after the men but suddenly, they stopped, before even getting to run around the corner.

Out of instinct, Alya stopped as well, feeling Nino’s hand on her shoulder just a second later. A million questions shot through her head.

Why had they stopped? Was Marinette still there? Where did Chat Noir come fro-

She frowned.

Chat Noir stepped out from behind the corner, his baton leant on his shoulder in a seemingly relaxed way but his swishing tail showed his tension. His animalistic eyes were narrowed to slits as he stepped further forward, pushing the men back by his mere presence.

“Were you after this girl?”, he asked in a low, dangerous voice, his cat ears slightly pulling back. Alya had never seen him like this before.

One of the men answered, the first in front of Chat Noir.

“… Y-Yes…?”, he choked out, gulping when the superhero in front of him nodded.

“And I suppose you were going to use these?”

The men glanced at their hands to which Chat Noir gestured with his baton, the baseball bats suddenly weighing a ton.

“… Y-Y-Yes.”, another one said, lowering his bat.

“Alright.”

Alya’s shoulders slumped and she felt the tears finally flowing down her cheeks. No. No no no no, Chat Noir was not giving them free passage, no. He _wouldn’t_. He was a hero, right? He wouldn’t dare letting them kill Marinette, not when she just apologized, not when everything could be good again, not-

“But if you’re still planning to use these I have to cataclysm your face, my friend.”, the blonde suddenly said, a shudder going through the group of men, “Because I despise self-justification. So I’d advise you to burn these.”

Suddenly his eyes seemed way more dangerous and Alya could see fangs in his mouth as he snarled, even from the spot where she was standing. Weird… Chat Noir did never have fangs before…

“And never ever go after that girl again. Or you will have to go through me. Is that understood?”

The men quickly nodded and let the bats fall to the floor as if they burned themselves on the hard wood, quickly walking and then running away in the other direction. Chat Noir nodded and collected all the bats, his movements being followed by Alya’s and Nino’s unbelieving eyes.

As soon as he noticed them he briefly nodded and then, the bats beneath his arm, jumped away, not after Marinette or the men but in yet another direction. Over the school.

Alya turned to Nino, holding her breath as her eyes met his. He just shrugged helplessly, seeming a bit unsure about what just happened. They both looked at the spot where they had last seen Chat Noir, then Alya gulped.

“Hey Nino?”

“Mh?”, he hummed, not really listening to her because of his disbelief and surprise.

“Can-… Can we go-… Just-… Eat something…? I feel like-… If I don’t eat something now I’ll faint…”

His eyebrows furrowed and he briefly shot a glance down the street, then caught her gaze again.  
“What about Marinette? We gotta find her, we gotta-”

She sighed, nodding.

“I-… I know but-… She could be anywhere by now. Let’s just get something to eat and then we’ll go look for her…”, he still seemed reluctant so she lightly brushed over his arm, “What good are we for her if we break down in the streets?”

That seemed to get him. He grumbled and nodded, meeting her hand on his arm with his.

“Yeah-… P-Probably…”

“You look like you’re about to faint, too, so come on. We-… I think we got a lot to think about now. We can get something on our way to find Marinette, maybe.”

Nino sighed, already reaching for his wallet that he kept in his jeans pocket.

“… How does Chinese sound?”, he finally fully gave in, counting his money while already beginning to walk down the street where Marinette vanished, “On me?”

She managed a smile before taking his hand, longing to feel his soothing warmth on her palm to calm her down.

“Chinese sounds good. Can we take it on the way?”

He nodded.

“Yeah, I know a place where we can order to go.”

They remained silent after that, except maybe thinking out loud about where Marinette could have gone. The more they tried to find a logical place for her to hide the more they realized how hopeless their search would be. But they wouldn’t give up.

Not after Chat Noir’s action for her.

They had to tell her it would be okay again.


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Adrien finally realizes what caused Paris to hate Marinette so much.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yaay, another chapter!  
> I'm a little earlier than last time, still working on that. Well, I got a few other projects to work on but it'll be okay ;)  
> Not so much notes this time, just don't kill me and we'll see each other in the next chapter :D  
> Enjoy~

Chat Noir silently let down the baseball bats into the chest in the school’s integrated gym. He hated storing them here, where he could still smell the lingering tinge of the sweat and hate of these men on the handles. But he had to. He couldn’t reappear as Adrien with a bunch of baseball bats under his arm.

He would come back for them later, in the night as Chat Noir, then he would take them somewhere else and burn them.

His nose scrunched up in disgust. Disgust towards these men and himself.

They had tried to kill her. They wanted to kill her and the police wouldn’t have done anything. Nobody would’ve even noticed. Nobody would’ve cared, except for Nino, her mother, apparently Alya now and him. The anger seethed in him and he gritted his teeth, trying to keep the snarl in. He hadn’t even been able to listen as the class had talked outside of the classroom. All he had been able to do was contemplating whether he should go after these men or not. When Marinette had run out of the school the decision had been an easy one.

He had run here, into the storage room of the gym, had transformed and leapt out, cutting off these guys. Not a minute too late it seemed. He had seen Alya and Nino trying to run after Marinette, reach her before they did, but they wouldn’t have stood a chance.

He had already begun worrying about Marinette a little longer ago.

After the conversation with Nino and Plagg he had finally begun seeing her apart from her Akuma. And when he heard the guys he knew it was enough. If he didn’t have the courage to ask for her forgiveness he at least could try and protect her the best he could.

“ _Plagg, claws in_ …”, he whispered, sinking down against the chest to sit on the floor. A green flash illuminated the storage room and the Kwami dropped out of his ring into his lap.

“… Kid?”

Adrien cupped his hands beneath him and scooped him up, looking at him through sad eyes.

“Yeah, Plagg?”, he silently asked.

“I’m proud of you. Really proud of you. You’re on a good way.”

The corners of Adrien’s mouth pulled up and he nodded at his Kwami.

“Thanks…”

He wordlessly pulled out a slice of camembert from his bag that he hid in this room before transforming, watching as Plagg enjoyed a big bite.

“Do you-…”, he finally spoke up again, his voice unsure and shaky, “Do you think I can be a hero?”

Plagg sighed, already wanting to repeat his fiery speech from the day before but Adrien wasn’t finished. His green eyes stared into the semi darkness of the small room and the dimmed ray of lights shone on the conflicted, sad face of the boy.

“I-… I mean… Can I be a hero for Marinette? I-… I don’t care about the rest of Paris, I just-… Wanna make it up to her again… I’ve been such an asshole and I-…”, he sighed, his expression contorting in the memories of her akumatization, when he kicked her over and over again, “… I hurt her, Plagg… I hurt her more than anything and-… And I-…”

He gulped, his voice dying. Plagg left his slice of cheese on Adrien’s hand, slowly hovering up to place a paw on Adrien’s turned away cheek.

“Kid, it’s gonna be okay. You just gotta make her see you understood what’s going on now. You gotta show her you’ll be there for her-”

Adrien already wanted to say something but Plagg shook his head.

“… As both Adrien and Chat Noir. Alya may only have to worry about herself but Marinette doesn’t see you as one. You have to do twice the work to make her see.”

Adrien willed his eyes to stay dry as he turned back to his Kwami who was hovering just before his face now.

“But-… H-How do I do that? How will I-… Y-You know…”

The little god sighed and flew back into Adrien’s hands, picking up the half-eaten cheese again.

“I suppose it’ll be easier to approach her as Adrien first. You gotta make her see she can be comfortable around you again. She’ll most likely be scared of Chat at first. Since-…”

Adrien nodded, not wanting to hear it again what he had done to her at her akumatization. He bit his lip, lowering his hands with his Kwami to his knees so he didn’t have to hold them up anymore. His breath hitched and he briefly let his eyes flicker to the door to check if someone was coming, then back to Plagg.

“And-… H-How? I mean as Adrien, how will I-…”

“You didn’t listen to your friend Nino out in the hallway, huh?”, Plagg shot him a scolding glare as he threw another bite of cheese into his mouth, “He had a really good idea for that topic.”

Adrien lowered his gaze in guilt, shaking his head.

“Yeah, sorry, I was thinking about whether to go after these guys or not. I didn’t listen. What did Nino say?”

Plagg shot him another look but this time Adrien couldn’t decipher what he meant with it.

“He said you gotta approach her slowly. Hold a door open for her. Keep an eye out for her. Lead her away when the other classes are giving her a hard time again. _Show_ her you wanna help her. She’s most likely gonna be too scared to talk to anyone right now and she’ll most likely be skeptical and scared. You gotta make her see you’re okay to be around. Nino already managed that, she trusts him even if she doesn’t really interact with him. You see?”

Adrien nodded slowly, thinking about what to do.

“And-… What about Chat? I gotta make her trust Chat again since-… W-Well, as Chat I-… I-…”, suddenly the realization struck him. He had kicked her, he had showed Paris what to do. It was his fault. If he as Chat had protected her it wouldn’t have escalated so heavily. If he had helped her up, walked her home, had cared for her and, as the role model for the whole of Paris, had showed them that she was no threat, that she was not at fault, nobody would’ve ever thought otherwise. But of course, if Chat lashes out on someone like that, people are more likely to step in his footsteps.

He shivered. No good metaphor…

“… I destroyed her life, Plagg… I’m the reason she has no family anymore, no home, no friends… I’m the reason people are hunting her down. I’m the reason, Plagg, I acted like an asshole as a role model and of course-… Of course that’s the example they’re orientating their actions on… I-…”

Adrien gulped, feeling tears welling up in his eyes and rolling down his cheeks. A cold breeze caressed the wet traces on his skin.

“… I killed her, Plagg… It’s-… It’s my fault, I-… I killed Marinette-… I-…”, he sniffled, lowering his face to his lower arms and curling up into himself but still keeping his hands as a plateau for Plagg.

The Kwami just swallowed the last piece of cheese, then he flew up to rest on Adrien’s head, the boy’s hands immediately moving to hug his knees.

“Kid… Kid, you-… You just acted how you felt, you-… You were in shock you couldn’t stay reasonable and rational. It’s not your fau-”

“It is!”, Adrien yelled, now openly sobbing and causing the tiny god to float in front of him again, “It’s my fault, I destroyed her life, I’m the reason she-… She’s bullied and hunted down and-… And I caused all the hate, if I had-… If I had protected her, if I had stood up for her none of this would’ve happened, if-…”

He trailed off and sobbed harder, shaking his head. It’s been him, it’s all been him.

“Adrien, listen to me, please, you’re not-…”

“I am!”

The Kwami sighed and settled down on the knees of his chosen. There was no chance of talking to him right now. He had to wrap his mind around the possibility that he could’ve prevented the last months from happening. After a few minutes, however, the sobbing slowly died down and Adrien stilled.

“Kid?”

No answer. He shivered from time to time and held his breath but mostly stayed still and silent.

“Adrien?”, Plagg tried again, fearing a shock, “Hey, kitten, please answer.”

The boy suddenly lifted his face from his thighs, a scared expression on his face. Then he mumbled something unintelligible.

“Adrien, what’s going on, please talk to me!”

“She-… She ran away… She-… She didn’t come back.”

Plagg floated up as Adrien stood up, a worried expression on his face.

“Kid, you don’t know that. She could be back in class, or at home, you don’t know tha-”

“Someone’s trying to kill her and she returns to the school? Not very probable. Back home? Maybe. I-… I gotta go look for her.”

He shook his head, stretching out his small paws.

“Adrien, stay calm, please. Please go back to class and look after her there first, please. You gotta think about what I told you, Adrien, you gotta start with Adrien, she’ll be scared of Chat No-”

“ _Plagg, claws out!_ ”, he interrupted the frantic Kwami, stretching out his hand with the ring.

“No, no, no, kiiiiiiiid!”, he cried before a flash of green illuminated the room once more, Chat Noir taking Adrien’s place.

And with a breeze of opening the window once more, he was out and back on the roofs of Paris.

 

* * *

 

Nino sighed as the darkness slowly took over the streets, the lanterns turning on and the people slowly vanishing in their houses. Alya didn’t slow down and didn’t wait one bit, still keeping her back straight, her eyes cautious and her mind awake after hours over hours of searching.

While he got tired. Of course he worried for Marinette but his feet began hurting and his attention span got shorter and dimmed. He didn’t want to walk around anymore. If Marinette didn’t want to be found they wouldn’t be able to find her. Paris was a huge city and if she took a turn they didn’t take she was long gone.

“Alya, really, let’s continue searching tomorrow… This is of no use. I don’t want you to be out in the dark and we should rest. Today was a hard day an-”

“I won’t stop, I won’t give up and I certainly won’t stop searching for her.”, she walked back to him and japed her index finger into his chest, stressing every argument she made, “She’s alone, she’s scared, who knows what these guys are still up to, who knows how many guys are still out there who think like this, who knows where she is and how long she’ll stay away, maybe she’s cold, maybe she’s hungry or thirsty, _I won’t give up_ so you better stay with me, Lahiffe, if you worry about me.”

Nino gulped but then gently took her hand away from his chest as he saw tears pooling up in her eyes, the wetness shining in the light of the lantern a few feet away.

“Alya… C-Calm down. Please, it’s dark and we could be in danger. We won’t find Marinette. We won’t find her.”

Alya shook her head, pressing her lips together.

“I messed this up, Nino. I shocked her, I was too fast and I gotta find her again. I gotta make this okay again so don’t stand in my way. You were the one to open my eyes so why, why are you suggesting we should just drop her like a hot potato?!”

Nino gently grabbed her shoulders and shook her a little, just to make her listen to him, just to make her see what he was trying to tell her.

“Alya, if Marinette wants to hide we have no chance of finding her. We could’ve already walked by her hiding place, we could be a kilometer off. Please, be reasonable. It’s been hours. She could be anywhere. Let’s-…”, he sighed heavily and her head dropped against his chest, the helplessness heartbreakingly obvious on her face, “… Let’s go home, Al… We’ll continue tomorrow…”

She sniffled and loosely hugged him, then nodded against his chest and breathed through before straightening up again.

“Okay… Okay, let’s go home…”

He smiled and kissed her forehead before wrapping one arm around her shoulders, leading her towards her home.

“We’ll see what we can do for her tomorrow, okay?”

She nodded once again, leaning her head against his shoulder.

“… Yeah… Thanks Nino…”

“For what?”

“For-… Making me see… And standing by me even as I just worsen the situation more and more…”

He smiled at that, shaking his head and pulling her closer to him.

“It’s okay… You didn’t worsen anything and I’ll always stay by your side.”

 

* * *

 

Adrien panicked as the sun went down, dipping Paris into darkness.

She wasn’t at home, she hasn’t been in school, nobody had seen her and it was getting dark. He had seen a few groups like the one following her today and had scared them all off but he hadn’t seen her yet.

Where was she? Was she cold? Did she need help? Was she drinking again?

He gulped and ran faster, his claws clicking against the roof tops and his legs burning. But he wouldn’t give up. He refused to give her up.

Just then he heard a quiet sob. He immediately turned his head, completely trusting his heightened cat senses that the transformation granted him. Another sob.

He bolted, quietly, running towards the noise that he had searched for since he had begun running this morning. He dashed towards it faster and faster until he suddenly stopped, looking down into an alley.

Blue hair was the first he could see. A curled up, trembling body, sobbing. It was her, it was her!

He could believe his luck! He was about to drop down in full transformation, wanting to approach her as Chat, as Plagg’s words came back in his mind.

No. Adrien. She would be too afraid of Chat. She would probably try to run away. He had hurt her over and over again as Chat. His superhero persona didn’t deserve to ask for her forgiveness yet.

So he dropped down on the street next to that alley, looking around to confirm nobody could see him and ducked behind a car to detransform. Safety be damned.

A few people looked out of the window, alarmed by the suddenly flash of green but nobody seemed to make a connection. Nobody had seen him.

A breeze went through his hair as he looked around the alley, just so seeing Marinette’s feet behind a container. He slowly edged in, not wanting to scare her.

His footsteps seemed too loud in the echo and Marinette immediately quieted but Adrien continued his way.

“Marinette…”, he mumbled, just loud enough fo her to hear, “Marinette, don’t worry… It’s okay…”

He could see her sitting up by now, then he stepped into her view. She immediately recoiled but he stretched out his hands, shaking his head.

“It’s okay… It’s okay. I know you’re scared and-… There are a few other groups around… I-… I wanna get you home, to safety…”

She gulped, her eyes wide, and didn’t respond. He bit his lip, slowly lowering himself down to his knees.

“Please, I know you don’t trust me… I was an asshole… But please, you shouldn’t be out anymore…”

“G-Go away…”, she whispered, her chest moving quickly from her panicked breathing.

“Please, Marinette… It’s dangerous… If you don’t wanna be with me I’ll call your parents or Nino… Just-…”, he gulped, “… D-Don’t stay here, please…”

She seemed to consider something, her hand going down to her purse as if to encourage herself, then she hesitantly got to her knees, shakily standing up. Only now Adrien noticed how thin she had become.

“O-Okay…”, she said quietly, almost unwillingly, a gently breeze waving through her hair, “… I’ll go with you.”


	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Coup de foudre. Almost.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a key chapter. It's really important for the story as a whole and I hope you like it.  
> (Don't worry, That_One_Mimic, I didn't forget your OneShot)  
> Anyways, this chap is a little longer than the others, to make up for it. And I'm staying on schedule! I've set priorities now and everything relaxed a bit so it's absolutely no problem anymore!  
> Means, an update every three days is safe, no break and no delay needed, promise :D  
> Enjoy~

Adrien stayed where he was when she stepped towards him. He wouldn’t corner her and he certainly wouldn’t risk scaring her by suddenly coming towards her. He already did his steps.

He knew that now, she needed to come to him. He had seen fear in her eyes and noticed her still quick breathing.

She needed that kind of control again when she had lost it over the last months. She had to begin to trust him again through realizing he wouldn’t push her to anything. She had to realize he would grant her safety through giving her confidence to take things in her own hands again – if only with him.

Their gazes met and he gulped, still feeling old emotions bubble up, still feeling a slight recoil at her eyes. These were the eyes that saw Ladybug’s death. No, Miss Fortune was the one to kill her…

He bit his lip as he realized what really upset him in seeing her eyes.

These were the eyes to which he had continued kicking. These were the eyes that had pleaded him to listen to her, these were the eyes that had tried to tell him it was the bracelet she still wore around her wrist, snapped in half but sewed back together.

She had fought and defeated the Akuma for him. He would’ve never won if she hadn’t told him where the Akuma was. He would’ve never won against Miss Fortune if Marinette hadn’t regained control over her body again.

She had been the real hero of the day. She had been the one to do Ladybug’s job – locate the Akuma.

He quickly lowered his gaze, his throat blocking and guilt weighing down as a wet curtain in his eyes, clouding his vision.

She lightly swayed, she was probably feeling dizzy from all the running and not having eaten something. It was obvious that she hadn’t had breakfast, not with these guys following her to school, not when she was this pale and shaky on her feet. She probably spent the night in the streets until these guys found her in the morning. She probably didn’t have something to eat since yesterday.

She came to a halt in front of him, her arms tightly wrapped around her shivering form, shivering because of fear.

“Why-… Why are you-… How did you find me…?”, she finally asked, her voice quiet and raspy. Unused from months of keeping quiet, he realized.

“I went after you-… After Chat Noir scared these guys away.”, her eyes widened in surprise and he remembered that she had already been down the street when he had stepped in the way of the men, “I was worried… Nino and Alya are searching for you, too, but I don’t know where they are.”

She slowly nodded, her gaze lowering to the ground, but at his last statement she gasped and looked around.

“They-… They could be in danger, they shouldn’t-…”, with a few quick steps she was out of the alley, fighting to stay upright but still looking around in panic, “You-… You need to find them, I can get home on my own. They shouldn’t look for me, it’s too dangerous!”

Adrien was completely dumbstruck.

After all these months of suppression, of mobbing and death threats, of glares and name calling, of being beaten up to the point of unrecognizability, of alcohol abuse to cope with the pain the whole of Paris put her through she still cared more for others than herself. After all this, she still went out in the open, not caring if another group of violent vigilantes could spot her, because she was worrying for Nino and especially Alya, who hadn’t been much better than anyone else since Ladybug’s death.

He slowly came up behind her, not daring to touch her but still stretching an arm out, hinting to an embrace around her shoulders, just to give her a feeling of cover and safety, of protection.

She looked up to him, her eyes wide and fearful.

“P-Please, Adrien. You have to go look for them. Please.”

His gaze softened from shocked to understanding, slowly nodding.

“I’ll call them. I’ll make sure they get home. But they’re two. I won’t leave you alone, it’s too dangerous.”

She worried her lower lip, seemingly considering her options. He had no doubt that she wanted to be alone rather than with him. But he couldn’t leave her alone, not with people like these men out.

“Marinette.”, she recoiled at her name but he quietly continued, not wanting to intimidate her even more, “Please let me help you.”

The next question shouldn’t have surprised him. It really shouldn’t have. And yet, when the desperate words tumbled from her lips, as fast as she had sometimes spoken back then, it hit him like a wall. His heart clenched while he felt a stab, leaving him with short breaths.

“Why do you want to help me?!”, as soon as she finished she clutched her hands over her mouth, tightly squinting her eyes together. She was still scared.

Adrien tried to swallow but his mouth was dry. His arm sunk and he sighed, letting his head hang low.

“Because I was being an asshole… I acted like a complete jerk and-… And I didn’t see you getting so bad… I-”

She quickly shook her head, her gaze finding his again as she lightly bent down to get his attention back.

“No, no, Adrien, you acted completely normal. You didn’t know better just-… Why-… Are you helping me _now_? I-… F-First Alya and now-… I just don’t understand…”

He bit his lip and instead of answering her question, he stretched out an inviting hand, his palm turned upwards. She questioningly let her gaze jump from his hand to his eyes and back to his hand. Over the day it had stopped raining sometime around lunchtime but now he felt another little drop hitting his skin.

“C’mon. Let’s get going. I’ll tell you on the way.”, he tried a soft smile even though he trembled of anticipation. Would she turn and try to run again? Would she take his hand? Would she maybe have a shock? A panic attack? There were so many possibilities bolting through his thoughts in the short time that Marinette needed to react, stretching out the moment of a few seconds to years for him.

She finally pressed her lips together, taking his hand and nodding.

“… Okay…”, she replied, then lowered her gaze and began walking down the road beside him. He swallowed as he felt her skin ice cold on his so he quickly parted their hands, shrugging off his jacket and placing it around her shoulders. She jumped at first but as she felt the stored body warmth from him seeping into her skin she gratefully slipped her arms in to the sleeves, before feeling his hand on her far shoulder, his arm around her body.

“… Is this okay?”, his voice sounded, way closer than before. She froze slightly but managed to resume walking, nodding robotically since she shivered.

“… Y-Yeah, that’s okay…”

They continued walking in silence, knowing they’d have a long way to reach her home. She had run pretty far.

The girl knew he wouldn’t say anything before she didn’t give him her permission to do so. He had showed her before. He would wait until she was ready and she was incredibly thankful for that.

Like this she could get used to the situation, she could adapt and she didn’t have to fear that something would go wrong since she was defining the pace. She could collect herself at any given moment if she needed to and wouldn’t have to fear that he would judge her.

He had always been like this. A gentleman.

It had been the reason she had fallen for him, she suddenly remembered. He had offered her the umbrella, had stood in the rain and hadn’t judged her one bit when she had hesitated. He had always approached her carefully and had been considerate of her shenanigans around him. She knew he had noticed when she had flailed around, Nino had told her. But he had acted like he didn’t see it, to save her the embarrassment.

And now she just felt-… At ease. For the first time in months, she didn’t have to pull up her shoulders. For the first time in months she didn’t feel like throwing up when making eye contact with someone because they glared at her.

She didn’t really know if that had been the reason for her to open up to him, out of everyone. Alya had apologized for her actions and Marinette had cut her off but with Adrien it had been different.

Was it that she was reminded of old feelings for him? She thought she had lost all emotional connections to him when he had reacted so coldly to her after her akumatization, after everyone had reacted so coldly. Well, justified, they all didn’t know what really happened and they all reacted just like she would’ve reacted.

But-… Was it possible that there was something left for him? Was it possible that she still, after all this time, felt something for him?

She quickly denied it.

No, he wouldn’t want to be with a murderer. He wouldn’t want to be with her, ever. She knew he had been a big fan of Ladybug. She knew it wouldn’t happen so she quickly had to forget it. She didn’t want to hurt him by having a crush on him and she certainly didn’t want to be hurt if he had to reject her.

Finally, she had calmed down enough again to talk to him and find out why he pulled a complete turn-around in his behavior towards her. She was pretty curious as to why people like Alya, who she hurt the most, and Adrien suddenly decided to apologize and help her.

“So…”, she began, already hesitant, “… Why-… Why are you helping me now?”

He busied himself by fixing the collar of his jacket on her shoulders, careful not to touch her skin since he didn’t want to scare her again.

“I-… I saw how bad it was getting around you and-… I realized that you were never at fault for what your Akuma did…”

She sighed, hugging herself as they went, a few droplets now hitting the pavement around them and a breeze playing with their hair. Soon it would rain again.

“W-Well, I was at fault for my akumatization… I hurt Alya…”

He shook his head, his arm which formerly just grazed over her back and shoulders now gently tightening.

“No, you’re not at fault. It was a dumb comment by Chloé and, as Alya told me, a misunderstanding between you two. It was just-… Unlucky.”

She humorlessly laughed at the word he used to describe how they had gotten here but kept it to herself. As much as she actually wanted to reveal to anyone who she had been by now, nobody would believe her. Adrien would probably laugh at her, take the jacket away and give her to one of the violent vigilantes that strolled around everywhere.

And she somehow felt like Chat should, had to be the first one to be told. She owed him that much for leaving him alone the past months. Plus, if someone else knew about her secret identity before Chat, they’d be unprotected because Hawkmoth knew who she was. It would be too dangerous to tell anyone without Chat being able to protect them and her.

And, well… What would it help? She better not risk losing Adrien as the first one who she opened up to in making him believe she was trying to lie to set things right again. So she stayed silent about that.

“… So you-… You said-… You acted like a jerk…”

“I did.”, he was quick to respond, nodding to stress how bad he felt about it, “I-… I don’t wanna be too fast or overwhelm you or anything but-… I’m sorry for how I acted these past months. I’m really sorry. I wanna make it up to you again.”

She kept quiet for a while and he gulped, already preparing to run after her in case she got a panic attack like she got one this morning, with Alya apologizing. She had told him over the phone how that had gone.

“Marinette?”, she lightly flinched and he cursed himself, already fearing it would end badly if he continued, “I-… I really didn’t wanna overwhelm you, I-…”

He trailed off as she slowly shook her head.

“… No, it’s-… Good to hear, actually… I-…”, she sighed, “It’s good to hear… But-… Why now? N-Not that I wanted it earlier or-… Or at all, since-… I’m not in the position to demand things but-”

He shook his head, taking a faster step to get in front of her and softly stop her, loosely holding her on her upper arms. He just let his hands lay on the jacket, signalizing her that he wouldn’t hold her back if she wanted to step out of his hold, that he wouldn’t harm her.

“No, no you _are_ in the position to demand things. You are allowed to demand things. In fact, you should demand an apology from everyone trying to hurt you. From every single one. Because you’re not at fault, you were akumatized. Every child knows Akumas are just the negative feelings. Everyone knows Akumas aren’t these people anymore. Sure, these personas are a part of people, a dark but existing part, but most of Paris failed to understand that you are _not_ Miss Fortune. Alya is not Lady Wifi but Lady Wifi was before and will always be a part of her. Chat Noir was an idiot for showing Paris a wrong example but you shouldn’t suffer because of his stupidity, because he was idiotic and wrong and-”

Before he could resume she slowly contorted her face. The corners of her mouth tensed and pulled down and her eyebrows pulled together in a heartbreaking curve. Within seconds, tears flowed down her cheeks and she slowly sobbed one time. Then another. She lowered her head, leaning her forehead against his chest and beginning to cry. Adrien was quick to interrupt himself and hesitantly wrap his arms around her, gentle and light, not to hold her restrained. He felt she had been hold roughly way too many times in the last months.

It didn’t last long. For that, she had held off her emotions way too long already and didn’t feel safe enough around him, yet. She barely sobbed a few times, sniffling and breathing heavily for the rest of the hug. Her hands had slowly found a way to his stomach, her fists clenching into the fabric of his shirt. She probably didn’t feel attached enough to him yet to hug him back.

After a few moments, she straightened up again and nodded gratefully, tears still flowing down her cheeks but her eyes already clearing up again and the lines in her expression softening. She brushed over her nose with her hand and shrugged embarrassedly, dropping her arms to hang by her sides, defeatedly.

“Feeling better yet?”, he carefully asked, not wanting to urge her to let it out. Not yet. Not out in the open.

The bluenette managed a small smile, something Adrien hadn’t seen on her since the day of Ladybug’s death, and nodded.

“Yeah, relatively… Sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry.”, he promptly blurted out, “It’s-… It’s okay, really… It’s alright. Please-… Please feel free to do anything you want around me. Okay?”

Her gaze was cast down as she nodded this time and he waited for a few more moments before stepping beside her again, sliding his arm to its original position and nudging her to continue their path.

“Come on, let’s get you home…”, he mumbled, keeping her close when she shivered. They walked in silence again, neither wanting to speak first, until Marinette buried her hands in the pockets of his jacket, suddenly pulling something out with a surprised look on her face. Adrien observed as she recognized the bracelet she had given him all that time ago, when Max had been akumatized. It was her lucky charm that she had given him, for good luck during the gaming tournament.

Her eyebrows shot up and she wordlessly glanced up to him, knowing he watched her. The silent question lingered between them and Adrien nodded as an answer.

He still carried it around with him anywhere he went. He still had it. When he felt like he needed luck he would tie it around his wrist. Marinette’s jaw fell at his little confirmation, glancing down to the bracelet again.

He kept it. He had kept it until this very day. He still had it.

A slight breeze played with his hair as she looked up to him again, a small smile as he watched the bracelet rest in her hand, obviously lost in thought.

Suddenly she saw the young boy in her room again, leaning back in her pink chair, telling her she was amazing. She didn’t see the young man, his arm wrapped around her shoulder. She didn’t see the sharply cut chin or the light stubble on his upper lip or the prominent cheekbones. She didn’t see him as he was now. In the line of his eyebrows, in the curve of his nose and in the softness of his cheeks she could still recognize the fourteen-year-old boy. She could still see the kindhearted child, the shy boy waiting for everyone to have finished their sentences before speaking.

The boy who gave her the umbrella.

She felt her heart beat faster but turned away before it would become too dangerous.

She couldn’t! She didn’t even fully trust him, yet, how could that work?!

That was not happening right now, she didn’t still have feelings and she didn’t just develop new ones or revived the old ones or-… She was so confused! She still felt the fear of him leaving her in the dust, of waking up and this was all a dream, she was still not fully trusting him, so how could she already feel like this again?

The bracelet, that had to be it!

She had felt something, pulled out the bracelet and she had been surprised that he had kept it all these years, yes.

She was just surprised. She was nothing more than being surprised. She didn’t just see the boy she had fallen in love with a long time ago in him. She just didn’t!

And yet, her gaze found its way back to his face, his eyes still staring in the distant past. Did he remember how she had given it to him?

She followed the line of his nose up to his eyes, the green color richly shining through the tears that had gathered in the corners. And while probably recalled how she had given him the bracelet, she was thrown back even farther. Now she saw it clearly. He was still the same boy who had given her his umbrella. He was still the same boy, even as he had matured and, admittedly, treated her with ignorance. He had reacted humanly, Marinette knew that.

She would be a hypocrite if she tried to claim that she would’ve reacted differently if he had killed Chat Noir. She would have probably done the exact same thing. Not really called out on him. Or tried to hurt him.

But she wouldn’t have been able to interact with him. She wouldn’t have been able to do so much as look at him. She wouldn’t have been able to hold eye contact.

He suddenly turned his head, breaking his gaze off the bracelet in her hand, his eyes suddenly meeting hers. Out of the corners of her eyes, just behind his head, she saw a summer lightning flashing in the distance. The thunder was left out, the storm not yet close enough for her to hear it. And yet, she remembered that time with the umbrella, when the thunder had rolled over the sky.

 _Coup de foudre_ , she thought to herself as her gaze flickered between his eyes, just like the first time when he had held out the umbrella for her, _almost_.

Adrien didn’t even hesitate to tilt his head and speak up.

“Are you feeling alright? You look awfully pale.”, she just continued to stare and he lifted his eyebrows, “Marinette? Do you need something? Water? Or-… Or anything else?”

She gulped, finally shaking her head, feeling a little dizzy.

“N-No, I’m fine…”, she mumbled, trying to shake off the weird feeling she had gotten when he had held her gaze. Even asked if she was alright.

He didn’t seem to buy it since he walked sideways now, an uncertain expression on his face.

“Oh-… Okay…”, he tried but she didn’t respond once again, so he turned up front. Though his eyes lit up as he glanced down the street, lightly walking faster.

“You must be hungry.”, he said, “So lemme take care of that.”


	22. Chapter 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things are beginning to look better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm still a little busy but it definitely won't affect the updates and I also won't stop uploading.  
> If you were worrying, don't :D I won't need to take a break and I promise to fully upload Breeze in the usual rhythm of three days ;)  
> I'm working on a few other projects but that won't put Breeze on a hiatus as well, so everything good here. Also, we're still not halfway done with Breeze, the amount of words I've uploaded up until now is definitely not half of the whole by a long shot.  
> So, you guys can definitely look forward to regular updates and a whole lot more of Breeze is coming your way.  
> Also, if you think we're over the hardest part, keep on dreaming~  
> But for now, enjoy the chapter!

“Wh-What?”, Marinette was barely able to stutter as he already fastened his steps, leading her towards a fast food restaurant. She just so managed to stay upright as she kept up with his steps. They entered and immediately, a greasy yet somehow appetizing smell filled her nose.

She looked around, out of reflex, and saw most people eating their food, chatting with each other, yet a few had looked up and now glared at her. She gulped, inconspicuously nudging Adrien and keeping her gaze down.

“U-Uh-… Adrien-… I don’t think I’m welcome here-… Or anywhere for that matter. L-Let’s just go…?”

He narrowed his eyes as she already took a little step back, pulling on his shirt, searching for the people who didn’t approve of her presence. He easily caught their gaze and followed Marinette’s step but instead of escorting her out he wrapped an arm around her shoulders and openly pulled out his wallet, still glaring back at the people. Those who recognized him now stared at them with a surprised expression and those who didn’t eventually let them be, concentrating on their food again.

“So, what do you want?”, he asked instead of reacting to her, turning up front again. He was still a bit unsure with these fast food restaurants, he had been there with his friends before but never alone – or, well, ordering for someone else who surely wouldn’t be speaking.

He couldn’t judge Marinette for that, even if he wanted. She already had her problems with opening her mouth around people she knew, completely justified, so it was perfectly fine for her to be scared to talk in public.

He felt her shivering and immediately regretted making her stay here though he could feel how thin she had become. He definitely wouldn’t bring her home without having treated her something to eat. She needed this.

But instead of pleading him to go again she shyly stretched out her hand and pointed to a plain, small portion of fries. It was the cheapest on the menu. Adrien lifted his eyebrows, gently pushed her out of the line and pulled out his phone.

“I can ask Alya what you always preferred to eat when going to a place like this, y’know? I need to call her anyway, since she needs to know you’re safe.”

Marinette sighed, lowering her gaze to the floor and shrugged weakly.

“I just don’t wanna be a bother for you. I’ve been a bother for everyone in the past months, so I-… I don’t wanna be anymore.”

Adrien smiled at her confession, brushing over her back and cupping her cheek with the other. She flinched away but at least looked up to see him smiling.

“You’re not a bother. Promise.”, her shoulders slumped at the seemingly unspoken words _not anymore_ so he quickly added, “Have never been. It’s been a hard time for us all and I’m just glad I can treat you dinner right now. Okay?”

She sighed and finally told him she wanted a small menu consisting of a burger, a portion of fries and a small soft drink. He felt that wasn’t really what she wanted but just told him that to shut him up. It wasn’t rude, he realized as they went to the end of the queue again, waiting for their turn. It wasn’t false modesty either.

It was fear.

Fear to go to deep, fear to open up too much, fear to be too much of a bother for him and fear to be here at all.

So he kept his arm around her shoulders, stepping forward as the employee looked up to take their orders. He told him what Marinette wanted and then added his own wishes, not missing the sympathetic look the employee gave the girl. As he prepared their dinner he also didn’t miss that the employee slipped another few fries into their bag, along with a second dip and a little note. Adrien burned of curiosity as he took the bag, paid for both orders and saw the employee smiling at Marinette before exiting the restaurant, sensing she didn’t want to stay here for any longer.

As soon as they were out he led her to the next park that was just around the corner and sat down on a bench inside a pavilion, so they wouldn’t get wet from the rain that got stronger again, with her, opening their bag to pull out the note.

“Hey, that’s sweet.”, Adrien said without thinking as he read the little sentence on the napkin the employee had given them. Marinette blushed deeply when she took the napkin from him, briefly reading over the note that said **I believe in you** , before stuffing it into her pocket.

“Y-Yeah… P-Probably…”

Adrien waited if he could get another reaction out of her but she stayed silent and avoided eye contact so he pulled out her menu and handed it to her with a little, reassuring smile.

“Eat up.”, he said quietly, “You need to eat, Marinette.”

She flinched at her name again but took her food, pulling up her legs to fold them beneath her as she nodded lightly, beginning to eat. He didn’t say anything else to let her feel comfortable again but as soon as they were almost finished eating he realized she tried to stretch it out. She didn’t want to go home and she probably didn’t want him to call Alya as well. She wanted to spent another night out on the streets.

He turned towards her, waiting until she would make eye contact again. She finally looked up as soon as it was impossible not to notice his gaze anymore and he lightly leant forward, studying her face when he spoke.

“You-… You don’t wanna go home, right?”

Marinette immediately lowered her gaze to her fries again, half of them tumbling around in the paper bag they came in, taking one and quickly pushing it into her mouth so she had an excuse of not answering right away.

Adrien didn’t mind it, he would give her the time she needed. If and when she would answer was completely her decision.

“… No…”, she finally mumbled, still keeping her gaze on the fries, “I don’t wanna be anywhere…”

He reached over and offered his hand once again, sighing in relief when she took it.

“You do realize I have to bring you home, right?”

Tears welled up in her eyes and she nodded with erratic movements, her voice sounding thick as she replied.

“I-… I know…”

“And you do realize that if you don’t go home, I won’t either?”

A sniffle now worked its way up her throat and he immediately regretted cornering her like that but she needed to realize he wouldn’t leave her alone again.

“Do you wanna go to Alya’s place instead?”, he asked but she immediately shook her head so that her hair flew around, “Nino’s, then?”

Marinette seemed to consider it for a brief moment before shaking her head another time. Adrien brushed over her knuckles, incredibly thankful she didn’t pull away.

“I can’t bring you to my place, my father’s been a pain since that-… That day… So where do you wanna go?”

That seemed to break the dams again. Tears flowed down her cheeks a second time that day and Adrien gulped, a second time that day expecting to run after her. But once again the short time of letting her feelings out ended abruptly, she once again stopped herself because of fear. Because she needed to maintain her walls.

“I dunno…”, she finally whispered and he nodded, knowing exactly what she meant. He had felt like this for a short part of his life as well, not knowing where his home was, not wanting to return to the house that had become so cold since his mother had left.

He knew exactly how she felt.

“But I don’t wanna leave you in the streets, please.”, he tried a last time and she nodded, so he spoke out his last idea, “Should I stay with you at your home?”

Her gaze shot up and she incredulously looked at him, her hand slipping out of his.

“N-No, I-…” she gulped, straightening up again and he knew he lost her. How could he have been so stupid? He offered her his help, merely maybe an hour ago, completely turned around her world, offered her to trust him again and what did he try next?

Invade the only place she had been able to be alone? Stay in a room where she could openly let her feelings out, rob her of an entire night to-… What? Make sure she won’t start drinking again? That nobody of these guys will come pester her? To be with her, not leave her alone?

The only time she had been safe and free in these last months had been when she had been alone and he just had the audacity to ask her if he can basically steal her this opportunity for an entire night, especially after such an eventful day.

_Of course, Agreste, way to go_ , he thought as he sat back again, slowly nodding.

“Yeah, of course…”, he tried to save it but the conversation already died down. They both sat in silence for a few minutes, Marinette wordlessly offering him her fries which they finish before he pulled out his phone.

“I need to call Alya…”, she sighed, shrugging.

“You probably do.”

He looked up, his face falling a bit when he saw her hopeless expression.

“She’s worried, too, you know?”, he quietly mumbled, pulling up her contact, “She wants you to be safe.”

Marinette groaned, obviously frustrated with something.

“I know but-… Why now, why at all?! I-… No, No just forget it, call her. It’s alright.”

He shot her a quizzical look before pressing call, lifting the phone to his ear. Almost immediately Alya picked up, car noises audible in the background and another voice, probably Nino.

“Alya?”

“Hey Adrien… We’re heading home now. Got anything new from Marinette?”

He sighed, looking over to the girl next to him, once again cursing himself to have been too confident, too rash and too fast forward.

“Yeah, actually I got news.”, he was barely able to finish the sentence as Alya already interrupted him with a waterfall of words falling from her mouth at lightspeed.

“Oh god, is she okay? Where is she right now? Where are you? Agreste, if you left her alone I will skin you alive, I will make sure Mister Teen Model will not step outside anymore and I certainly will make sure you won’t be able to sit for a few days. Is Marinette with you? Where did you find her? How is she? Been drinking again? If she did and you left her alone I will-”

“Yeah, yeah, skin me alive and all that. No, she’s-… She’s actually here with me. I treated he dinner and I’ll bring her home now.”

Alya gasped and covered the speaker to talk to Nino, giving Adrien the chance to look over to the girl next to him once again. She had curled up on the bench next to him, her head already dropping down whenever she allowed herself to close her eyes. He carefully shifted closer and offered her his shoulder to lean on but she declined. He tried not to let his disappointment show as he heard Alya returning to the phone.

“Okay, where are you? Nino’s agreed to stay out a little later.”

Adrien quickly shook his head as he finally felt Mari’s head bumping against his shoulder, softly adjusting so she could rest her head there. She was hesitant at first but then she couldn’t fight it anymore, already drifting off. She probably didn’t sleep too much during the last night.

“Oh no, no, no, I’ll just bring her home now. She needs the rest, you can probably talk to her tomorrow. For-… For today I just wanna make sure she’s safe in her bed for a good night’s sleep.”

Mari lightly huffed and he heard Alya literally holding her breath as she heard the noises that obviously didn’t come from Adrien but after a few moments of silence Alya spoke up again.

“Oh, yeah… We should probably get to bed as well…”

Adrien nodded, smiling at the sleepy girl.

“Yeah, you should. Sleep well, Alya.”

“You, too. And if Mari doesn’t end up in her bed in five minutes I will-”

“Do your death threats ever change?”, he grinned and Alya probably rolled her eyes.

“I got a lot of them in store, thank you very much.”, she grumbled, Nino throwing something in in the background.

“I can definitely testify that.”

Adrien chuckled and nodded.

“Yeah, yeah. Get to sleep. We’ll see Mari tomorrow in school if she’s feeling well enough.”

They hung up and he gently leant her back to get rid of the trash in a nearby trash bin before scooping her up in his arms, gulping at how light she had become. He had lifted her a few times before, mostly because Alya and Nino had requested it to get the funniest reactions from the bluenette, but she had never been as light as she was now.

He adjusted her so her head rested against his upper arm and held her sleeping form closer, beginning to walk down the street towards her home. Luckily it wasn’t that far anymore.

He just had to explain a whole lot to her parents, he realized.


	23. Chapter 23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Adrien's having a serious talk with Marinette's parents.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one didn't quite go as I wanted...  
> It's short and late but I promise the story will move on more from now. Believe me, you guys, this story is gonna speed up again and hell it's gonna be heavy.  
> Anyway, I got fanart! Synovelle in the comments sent me this one and it looks so incredibly cool, you gotta check it out! Here's the link:  
> \--> sta.sh/071pnf11ib3  
> I also did a short sketch to how I think Miss Fortune looked like, it's under this link:  
> \--> https://awesomefreckledjesus.tumblr.com/post/166018879386/shimmies-in-throws-miss-fortune-from-breeze-at  
> For now, enjoy~

Adrien didn’t even have to wait after the first ringing of the doorbell. He was just about to ring a second time, shifting his weight to one foot, then the other. The rain had gotten stronger again and a cold breeze washed through the streets, chasing the last people inside.

The door widely opened in a hurried yank and the first thing he saw was a slightly different face than Marinette’s, older and sporting a few other significant details, but this definitely was her mother.

Just then he realized he hadn’t seen Sabine in ages. She gasped and slapped her hands in front of her mouth as she saw a seemingly lifeless Marinette in his arms so he quickly shook his head, drops flying from his locks.

“No, she’s okay. She’s sleeping.”, he reassured her, sniffling lightly since the rain still drenched him and the girl in his arms.

“Come in, Adrien, come in.”, she quickly stepped to the side and led him in, closing the door for him to feel a wall of warmth enveloping his cooled off skin, “Did-… Where did you find her?”

He adjusted his grip, taking care that her head wouldn’t fall back and jolt her awake, then he made eye contact with Sabine again.

“She-… She was in an alley, crying. It was a hard day for her and-… And she ran away.”

Sabine nodded.

“Alya called me and told me what happened…”

“I bought her dinner and carried her here after that. I only found her one and a half hours ago or so.”

The woman’s expression softened as she stepped towards him and brushed the wet hair out of her daughter’s peaceful sleeping face, sadness clouding her kind face.

“Thank you, Adrien. Thank you so much.”

He tried a smile but the corners of his mouth barely twitched before sliding down again.

“We should get her into bed. She needs it warm and comfy now.”, he proposed and Sabine nodded, leading him upstairs where Tom stood in the door.

“Hello, Monsieur Dupain.”, he greeted but the man barely gave him a look. His eyes were fixed on Marinette in his arms, “She’s asleep.”

Despite his tries to talk to her father, Tom didn’t react. He only slowly stepped towards him, now lifting his hands but hesitating to touch Marinette. His palms turned upwards in an offer and Adrien tilted his head.

“I’ll-… I’ll bring her upstairs. You can’t walk the stairs, son.”, his voice was raspy but Adrien couldn’t decide whether it was from under- or overusing it.

The blonde handed the man his daughter, watching him softly adjust her against his big form to almost hold the seventeen-year-old like a baby, his eyes filling up with tears. He turned his back towards his wife and the boy, hiding his face from them. Adrien watched him climbing up the stairs with his daughter, vanishing from their view and only jumped when he heard a sniffle next to him.

He looked down to the petite woman who had lifted a hand to her nose, turning her face away from him. He gulped, not really knowing if it was his place to comfort her but he cleared his throat regardless.

“Uhm-… Madame Cheng?”

She quickly shook her head and sniffled again, trying a smile when she looked back up to him.

“Sabine, please. Call me Sabine.”

He silently nodded, awkwardly burying his hands in his pockets.

“Uhm… I was just-… Are you okay?”

She sighed deeply, softly placing a hand on his back to lead him into the small kitchen and offered him to take a seat which he gratefully took. She busied herself with putting a few cookies on a plate to put it on the table in front of him and then proceeded to make hot chocolate.

“It was just-… After that incident with-… Miss Fortune, we lost Marinette. She was never the same after that. Tom hasn’t been the same either. He-…”

Adrien growled which caused Sabine to lightly jump and turn to him.

“Marinette told me he hates her.”, he said, remembering the night when he brought her home as Chat Noir, when she had been drunk.

Sabine’s eyes widened, a porcelain cup nearly slipping from her hands before she gripped it properly again.

“She-… What?”, the woman asked, obviously surprised. Adrien shifted on his chair, suddenly feeling uncomfortable with her looking at him. It probably hadn’t been his place to tell her that.

“I-… I found her before one time. I tried to bring her home and asked her if someone knew about her d-… Running away. She told me nobody cared and-… And that Monsieur Dupain hates her.”

Sabine breathed out, her shoulders slumping and her mouth lightly opening. She turned back to the coffee machine which currently warmed up the milk for a hot chocolate.

“Adrien, I’d-… I’d like to tell you it isn’t like this. But Marinette has to have experienced it like this, so there-… There must be-…”, she shook her head again, propping herself up on the counter, “… Tom is confused. He-… He doesn’t blame Marinette for anything, but-… He saw her akumatized form hurting me. He-… He’s incredibly angry at Hawkmoth to have taken advantage of Marinette’s bad feelings and he wants nothing more for his daughter to be safe but-… He doesn’t have the strength. He looks at Marinette and-… He sees me.”

Adrien tilted his head in confusion and Sabine sighed again, turning back to him to try a smile.

“I don’t know if you knew but I almost died. Miss Fortune surprised me when I wanted to look after Marinette and she let her fabric strings throw me across the room on my neck.”

Adrien’s eyes widened and only now he noticed the light scarf around Sabine’s neck as she pulled it away, revealing broad, dark red string-inflicted wounds on her skin. It was obvious they hadn’t healed fully yet, even after two months, and that it would still take a bit of time until they’d fully scar over.

“I’m actually lucky I can still move around. My spine was only minorly damaged which is a miracle.”

Adrien gulped, nodding slowly.

“Oh…”, he managed, earning a sad smile from her.

“Tom can’t help but see these wounds and associate them to her attack, which is understandable. And while he wants Marinette to be okay he just-… Can’t approach her. Or, well, couldn’t. When she started blocking everyone off he only had it harder. He was hesitant in the first place and when she even cut me off, he was immediately lost. I-… I can’t blame him, it’s just his being. He’s so soft and hesitant.”

Adrien sighed at the love she spoke with of her husband. Marinette sure was lucky to have parents like them, even if she didn’t see it at the moment. Had he attacked his mother while being akumatized, when she had still been here, his father would’ve completely blamed him. Not that it was any different at the moment… He still blamed him that his mother had vanished, Adrien assumed.

“You need something to warm up, Adrien.”, she suddenly said, placing a cup of hot chocolate in front of him, “Here, that’ll help. I’ll get a hairdryer for you. And oh gosh, I’m so sorry, please get out of this wet jacket, you must be freezing!”

He had to smirk at her sudden jumpiness as she walked behind him and pulled his wet white jacket from his shoulder. That’s right, he had given Marinette his raincoat, to keep her warm. She immediately vanished with his white jacket and came back with a hairdryer, plugging it in on the kitchen isle and turning it on to dry his hair.

“Uh, M-Mada-”

“Sabine.”, she firmly interrupted him as her fingers worked their way through his blonde, wet locks.

“R-Right… But this really isn’t necessary, I don’t wanna intervene for too long and-”

“Don’t you dare.”, she interrupted him a second time, moving over to his other side, “You’re talking nonsense. You’re welcome here, Adrien, you know that. And I certainly don’t want you to catch a cold.”

He sighed contently as he felt her fingers brushing through his hair, scratching his head in the most wonderful way possible. No matter how much he enjoyed paid massages, this one was totally different. It was like scratches he didn’t know he had longed for, it was absolute heaven. The warm blow of air combined with her fingers waving through his hair was just pure bliss. He hummed, closing his eyes but shortly after, when his hair slowly became dry again and the uncomfortable wetness faded, he felt his humming change. Slowly but surely, it got throatier and somehow a little raspy. He furrowed his eyebrows but didn’t stop, somehow it felt good for him. Sabine’s fingers got slower and he felt her leaning in, listening. This came oddly close to-… To a -… Purr?!

He yelped, his eyes shot open and he spun around to Sabine, his expression just as surprised like hers but maybe a little more shocked.

Her eyes jumped between his and he swallowed thickly as he saw her eyes narrowing, the gears working in her head. _Don’t, don’t, don’t figure me out, please…_

She lifted her eyebrows and shook her head, shrugging it off. Probably because he looked so uncomfortable and because his magic protected him. He tried not to let out a sigh of relief as she smiled and made him turn around again so she could dry his hair a little more before plugging the hairdryer out and putting it away. Just then, Tom came down the stairs again, his shoulders slumped and his gaze cast downwards.

“Is Marinette in bed, honey?”, Sabine asked, placing a hand on Adrien’s shoulder as she returned. Tom sighed and nodded, pressing a little kiss to Sabine’s forehead before walking around the table where Adrien sat, grabbing one of the three hot chocolates Sabine had made.

“She’s fine…”, he mumbled into the cup, leaning against the kitchen counter, “She didn’t wake up when I put her in pajamas and tucked her in. She’s still sleeping as tightly as she managed when she was a baby.”

Adrien involuntarily smiled at the thought, then he looked down into his own cup. The hot chocolate had cooled down enough for him to drink it now, so he took a careful sip, the sweet warmth instantly filling his body and mind.

“Thank you, Adrien.”, Tom finally said, quietly but full of emotion, causing Adrien to sigh and wrap his hands around his warm cup.

“It shouldn’t be necessary. And most importantly, it should be natural. Marinette needs help.”

Tom pushed himself off the counter and came around the table to put a heavy hand on his shoulder, lightly squeezing it.

“You helped her. That’s a step. And most importantly, she let you. I-… I just hope she’ll open up more, now that you managed to get through to her.”

Adrien sighed and nodded but let out a surprised yelp when Tom pulled him off his chair and tightly hugged him.

“Thank you for bringing my daughter home. Thank you so much.”

 

* * *

 

Around twenty minutes later Adrien emerged from the building, burying his hands into his pockets and directing his steps home.

The evening at Marinette’s house was heavily weighing down on his heart and now that he walked through the rain he finally allowed himself to openly cry. Plagg stayed inside his jacket but pressed against the inner wall of the pocket, reassuring him that he was there for his chosen.

But now he finally had a plan – try to get through to Marinette. He just had to manage, otherwise he didn’t want to know what could happen to her. With all these violent groups still on the loose and so many possibilities of what a few people could do to her…? He was downright scared for the girl. She had always been the sweet, shy one in the class, but incredibly headstrong underneath the cute surface.

He sighed and shook his head. He wouldn’t let it get so far that she wouldn’t be able to find a way out from now on. He’d protect her and he was sure, Nino and Alya were on his side, too. And only when he knew she was safe he’d be able to care for himself. The guilt that weighed down on him, the incredibly stupid things he had done and the harshness at which he had approached her for months.

He growled as he saw another group of people with suspicious looking things in their hands. They came his way, towards the bakery and he narrowed his eyes.

“Looks like it’s time to transform…”

Plagg whined lightly but as he stuck his head out of the jacket to see the vigilantes strolling their way he nodded.

“Looks like it, kid.”

“They won’t get her.”

Plagg bit back a comment about Adrien’s newfound protectiveness and pointed at a deeper house entrance.

“There?”

Adrien jumped in and transformed, then he waited until the group was close enough to step out of his hiding place, scowling at them.

This was going to be a long night. But he wouldn’t rest until he watched every single one of these assholes running home.


	24. Chapter 24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just as everything began looking better again...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry not sorry is all I can say ;)  
> I know I replied to most comments but I wanna say it here again in case someone felt left out:  
> THANK YOU GUYS SO MUCH!! I'm smiling at every single comment and even if I don't reply, I love reading your comments!  
> Thanks to everyone who commented and also thanks to all of you readers, it really moves me how many people compliment and critique me and guys, seriously, I just love all of you. Thank you so much for taking this journey with me!  
> Oh and also I want your tears but nah, that's minor ;)  
> Enjoy~

Marinette clutched her head and squinted her eyes. She had just woken up in her bed, cuddled in, warm and definitely not tipsy or hurt.

She had sat up and remembered what had happened, then the fear had overtaken her.

Just going with Adrien, not knowing what his real motivations were? Letting him in, talking to him, telling him stuff she should’ve kept to herself, what was she _thinking_?!

This could’ve gone very, very wrong and she should’ve known it but no, of course she had to try and talk to him, of course. She groaned and sniffled, slowly making her way down the ladder to dress herself for school.

She couldn’t make him worry for her, that wasn’t fair. She couldn’t make him feel guilty, nobody but her and Hawkmoth had to feel guilty. Adrien didn’t do anything to get her in this position and he knew it but he had helped her regardless.

_Thin ice, Marinette_ , she thought to herself as she grabbed her schoolbag. At least she was already late. This way neither Adrien nor Alya and Nino could try and talk to her. And maybe she would be able to flee fast enough for them to miss her. Maybe she could still get out of this unharmed.

_On the other hand_ , a tiny voice whispered in her head, _you could be okay again. Maybe they really want to help you. And you can’t exactly sink any lower than you already are._

She sighed and hesitated, sitting down on her chaise.

That’s right… She could be okay again… She could try and trust them and if they backstabbed her she wouldn’t sink even lower than she was right now. She could actually give it a shot.

So Marinette huffed, the breeze of her breath brushing over her clenched fist and stood up, opening her hatch and climbing down. However, the first thing she saw let her freeze.

Chat Noir was on screen, obviously it was live. He looked tired but still determined, pressing out each word with an emphasis that let Marinette feel a cold shiver run down her spine.

“… Not tolerate that behavior in this city.”, he said, his eyes turning hard. A male interviewer’s voice spoke up and Marinette’s breath hitched.

“So, you said you have reasoned with a few of these groups already, why do you feel the need to make this a topic on TV?”

He huffed and his expression got even angrier.

“Because I know there are more people who are ready to go out and kill an innocent girl. And I know there are even more people who maybe wouldn’t go as far but still blame her. It is not right and it shouldn’t remain in the heads of people for any longer so I’m making this a public statement.”, his eyes found the camera and he seemed to stare right at her, “Marinette Dupain-Cheng is innocent and should be treated like this. It’s a crime to go after her and I’m publicly declaring right now that she stands under my personal protection. If anyone tries to make her responsible for something she didn’t do that someone will have to discuss that with me.”

“You say that now but what about right after the fight? You didn’t seem to-”

“I apologize for setting a bad example. I was shocked to have lost my partner and I admit that depicting her to be at fault was wrong of me. Under this mask I’m just a human and I do make mistakes. This was a big one.”, his expression shifted to something softer and he sighed, looking at the camera again, “I’m sorry I failed you back then.”

Before the reporter could ask another question, Chat Noir looked back at him and nodded.

“This was the final statement, Thank you for broadcasting.”

He stood up and waved at the camera, the turned and walked out. Marinette stood shocked at the base of the stairs leading up to her room, her mind blank. She couldn’t process to whom he had said sorry, to the whole of Paris, to her specifically, or maybe even to Ladybug?

Her eyes were wide, her jaw slack and her entire body seemed to have lost all ability to maintain strength so she sank down to the floor. Only then, her parents noticed she had joined them, as they turned off the television.

“Marinette!”, her mother immediately jumped up and fell to her knees in front of her daughter, cupping her face and immediately searching for any reasons on why she could be on the ground, “Oh god, Marinette, we were so worried yesterday. When nobody could find you and it was raining and oh god, I’m so glad you’re okay…”

She tightly hugged her daughter and sighed, leaning back again to give her a tender smile and gesture back to the TV.

“I assume you heard that just now…?”

Marinette nodded in shock, her shoulders still slack and her eyes beginning to water from not having blinked in a while.

“Please, please don’t run away again, that’s-… That’s good he’s saying that! Like this we-… We won’t have to fear you’ll-…”, Sabine gulped but shook her head, standing up again and pulling Marinette with her to sit her down on the couch, “… Marinette?”

The girl slowly broke her gaze away from the black TV screen and looked at her mother, nodding for her to continue.

“If-… If it’s okay, I’d like to call you in sick today. Muss Bustier gave us a call and Adrien was here yesterday and-… I think it’s-… It’s time…”

“… Time for what?”, she croaked, her hands on her thighs clenching and unclenching.

Sabine exchanged a glance with her husband who had sit by quietly up until now.

“I believe we have a lot to talk about.”, she finally said, her hand carefully finding Marinette’s.

 

* * *

 

“Sabine wrote me, she says Marinette is at home. They-… Probably have a lot of family stuff to catch up on.”

Alya threw another longing glance to the bakery before sighing and leaning her head against his shoulder, oblivious to the light blush creeping up his neck to his ears.

“Hey, at least we know where she is and that she’s safe.”, he tried again and felt her shrug.

“I guess it’s at least something…”, she replied in a small voice, her hands lazily fiddling with her sleeves. He could see her biting back the nervousness and trying to stay calm while on the other hand, she must be dead on her feet. He hadn’t heard much, she hadn’t really talked, but he had been told by Max who lived across of her apartment, that she had escaped sometime during the night. That she had been gone for the better part of the night to-… Apparently search for something?

Nino didn’t know why she had done it and he didn’t dare asking since technically, he didn’t know about this. Plus, she was responsible herself. He was allowed to care and worry, but not exactly to control her.

If she thought spending the night out was a better idea than sleeping it was her fault and her responsibility to be awake at school the next day, no matter what. Just why did he feel so angry when he thought about her sneaking out? She had done that countless times, why did it bother him now? Was that another indication that he was just naturally a little overprotective or was it because he liked her a lot?

As much as Nino knew about being in love, after all he had been in love before her, the distinctions to other feelings were just too close. Sometimes he felt like he could only feel that with her, for example when he looked at her and felt the urge to hug her or touch her or tell her she was beautiful.

And then there were other times when he felt more like a brother to her, trying to protect her. Or when he could just take her and shake some sense into her, especially during the last months when she had still blamed Marinette. Though he could’ve done that to her along with the rest of the world so that was maybe invalid after all.

He sighed as he wrapped an arm around her, staring down to Adrien’s seat. That boy was missing again. Just why was he calling in sick so often, lately? Or had a photoshoot during school, or a lesson had been rescheduled, or-… The excuses were endless and tiring. For the last weeks Nino hadn’t even bothered asking, he had just taken the seat next to Alya and it had been okay.

Well… At least forgotten. Or-… Pushed aside.

Nino frankly didn’t care anymore. He had Alya now and he had to figure out a way to get through to Marinette so he couldn’t quite concentrate on Adrien. Besides, he didn’t want to. Or, at the very least, he would think about it if he wanted to. Adrien still had to prove he was on their side and work together with them. That he had found Marinette yesterday and had brought her home only did so much for Nino, he still didn’t trust the boy if he didn’t open up to him and Alya as well.

Okay, well, he hadn’t given him many chances but he still needed to know if they could trust him.

Nino sighed as he felt Alya slumping further against him, her breaths getting deeper. He tried shaking her but found that he didn’t have the heart to, instead adjusting her head and leaning his cheek against her forehead, keeping her in place. Her arm that had been behind their bodies slowly found its way around his arm and he felt her snuggle closer.

Well, it wasn’t that he didn’t know Alya was a cuddler in her sleep. Almost everytime when they had done a sleepover in the last years Alya and Mari had shared a bed or a mattress and Alya had always ended up clinging to Marinette over the night. He knew the bluenette had more than often tried to set the things so that she and Nino would sleep in one bed and while both and Nino as well as Alya certainly hadn’t minded sleeping like this, it had always gone wrong at one simple thing.

It meant Mari and Adrien had to sleep next to each other.

Long story short, it had never worked.

Nino smirked to himself but quickly felt that smirk fading as he remembered how close they had been.

And now? Would they ever do a sleepover again? Would they after all still be friends?

He sighed and took Alya’s hand on his thigh, interlacing their fingers, seeking for her warmth. Hopefully they would still be able to repeat something like that… Because he missed Marinette.

It wouldn’t be easy for her, for anyone, but Nino was willing to stay with her through it all. And with Alya.

He smiled as he felt her fingers lightly tightening on his hand. Hopefully.

“Nino?”, he felt someone tapping his shoulder, Nathaniel. He turned as much as Alya leaning against him allowed to and questioningly pulled up his eyebrows.

“Yeah?”

Nathaniel nodded to the front and Nino turned again, seeing Miss Bustier looking at him. In fact, the whole class looked at him.

“U-Uh, sorry, what?”, he blushed deeply and his palm suddenly felt sweaty. Just now he realized they were basically holding hands. Taking her hand had become so normal for him that he hadn’t even thought about what it may mean. Miss Bustier’s eyes wandered over the face of her student and she furrowed her eyebrows, making him gulp.

“I asked if Alya was sleeping. But apparently you are, too.”

He lowered his head in shame, still careful that she wouldn’t be jostled too much.

“S-Sorry, Miss Bustier…”

She shook her head and sighed, shooting them an undefined glance before leaning against her desk again.

“… Just-… Make sure she doesn’t sleep in other lessons. And-… You may as well make it comfortable for her.”

He blushed even more at her mumbled comment at the end of her speech and nodded lightly, sliding to the side and softly lowering Alya down to the bench to lay sideways, resting her head in his lap. He still made sure he could hold her hand before straightening up again and nodding at Miss Bustier, grateful for her understanding.

“Th-Thanks, Miss Bustier.”

The teacher just waved it off and continued with the lesson, leaving Nino to brushing through Alya’s hair and holding her hand to hold her on the bench and not let her roll off.

He smiled again as his fingers waved through her fluffy hair, letting the locks bounce out of his fingers when he lightly tugged.

Her face was peaceful and calm and he planned on keeping it like that.

 

* * *

 

Just when lunch break ended, though, Nino had to make a new plan. Adrien had joined them for the remaining lessons that day and the three teens sat in the schoolyard, talking about math homework, when a scream as well as a crash sounded through the building.

Alya immediately shot up, phone already in her hand, as students began running down the stairs. Adrien stood up and his knuckles turned white as he propped himself up on the table, his green eyes closely following the students, trying to analyze where the danger was. But to their surprise, the students didn’t scatter in all directions after leaving the school ground, instead they all gathered around on the front of the school building, looking to one side Their expressions were horrified and they pointed at something just as another crash made Nino shiver, jumping over the bench where he just sat and following the students outside, Alya and Adrien hot on his heels.

They ran outside of the school, their gazes following those of the students, as they recoiled. Smoke emitted from the building that they could only distinctly still recognize as the bakery from Marinette’s parents.

No, not smoke.

Gas, Nino realized. It was not as thick a smoke and nothing burned – yet.

An Akuma?

Alya’s hand searched for his as her phone clattered to the ground, her eyes wide and her entire body shaking. Nino ripped his eyes away from the black gas that vanished just as quick as it had come, scanning the area. Students and neighbors had gathered in a safe distance, watching as another crash sounded, causing another explosion of gas, not ignited.

Marinette or her parents were nowhere to be seen.

Nino already let go of Alya’s hand to run there and get them out but someone ran against his shoulder, pushing him out of the way. He barely had the time to see a blonde head jumping between the students, vanishing in the crowd before emerging on the other side and making his way towards the bakery. Nino saw Adrien pull up his white jacket to cover nose and mouth before running in at the front, getting out of sight as soon as he was inside the building.

The next he knew was that he screamed in unison with Alya and the rest of the people around, as a figure finally showed itself by floating around the building, coming into their view. The girl was clad in a fiery red outfit with a few orange and yellow lines, a purple butterfly illuminating her face.

“I’m Gasmine and I’ll destroy Marinette Dupain-Cheng!!”, she yelled, throwing yet another gas bomb into the shattered window of the living room above the bakery.

With a jolt of adrenaline, Alya and him both suddenly turned and ran down the stairs, eager to do something instead of just standing around.

Just then, the Akuma pulled out a lighter, clicking it and creating a little flame.


	25. Chapter 25

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes, a shock can cloud the vision.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The summary's extra edgy this time :D  
> Anyway!! As some of you might have already seen, I got gifted another story written in the Breeze Universe for me!! And it's super awesome!  
> If I didn't have as many ideas for Breeze as I still have, I'd totally make this the ending, for real.  
> Here's the link!  
> \--> http://archiveofourown.org/works/12310566/chapters/27986010  
> It's written by my friend synovelle and it'd be just perfect if Breeze took a light turn now, really, I cried my eyes out. Go read it!! She'll even write a third chapter, yay!!

Adrien recoiled at the sharp smell of the gas the Akuma had thrown in but he fought his way through, keeping one hand on his mouth and nose with his white jacket pulled up to give him some sort of protection. His other hand was pressed to the tiny bulge on his chest, trying to hold off the most for Plagg, His Kwami squirmed and curled up in a ball in his hand.

Adrien made his way up the stairs and cursed that he had stayed transformed all night. Plagg was exhausted, as was he, and he hadn’t had a chance to give his Kwami some cheese yet.

The boy bolted up the stairs, slamming open the door to the living room of the baker family to see one of Monsieur Dupain’s arms slumped over the backrest of the couch but nothing more. He grabbed into his jacket, pulled out his Kwami and shoved him towards the fridge, hoping Marinette and her parents kept some cheese in there, before bolting for the persons behind the couch. They had all lost their consciousness and laid slumped on the couch and floor.

But before he could react in any way and get them out or at least check their vital signs, the Akuma outside caught his attention. She scowled at him and readied another gas bomb with one hand, letting a lighter click in the other. Adrien’s eyes widened and he felt himself freeze in place, felt death’s cold hands reaching out to his neck, letting the soft, little hairs stand up straight. His eyes widened and he felt his body denying any command as fear took over his muscles, letting them harden and tremble.

But just before the Akuma threw, just before the certain death of four people and one Kwami (could Plagg die? He really didn’t know, probably not), he saw a tiny object flying up and hitting the Akuma’s head. He barely recognized it as a tiny hand mirror before it tumbled out of view to the street below. The Akuma turned and Adrien took a few steps to the side, glancing out of the shattered window to see Alya and Nino standing tall to face the Akuma.

“Congratulations, Alya, you really did a number on her. Hitting her with a hand mirror.”, Nino commented dryly, obviously unaware of the Akuma’s attention.

Alya shrugged, turned to him and apparently didn’t notice the Akuma either.

“I didn’t have anything else! And it bought us a bit-… Time…”, she had finally looked back at the Akuma who was now floating closer to the two disturbers, her head tilted and her fists trembling in anger. Adrien just so heard their terrified screams and the drumming of footsteps as Alya, Nino and the crowd of people fled. He, however, took advantage of the small distraction to check if Plagg was finally finished searching for food, already grabbing Madame Cheng’s petite form.

“Hurry, Plagg!”, he hissed at the Kwami as he pulled the woman outside, knowing Alya and Nino would be fine. The Akuma was after Marinette, after all.

“I’m eating as fast as I can!”, the Kwami replied in a hushed tone, gulping down another piece of parmesan cheese, “But I gotta eat more of this stuff since they don’t have camembert and it doesn’t restore my energy as well.”

Adrien huffed as he got Madame Cheng to the start of the stairs, laying her down gently and running back to grab Monsieur Dupain, thanking his strict work out plan and extracurricular activities as a superhero so he was able to pull the man out into the hallway. He left the door ajar as a safety measure, in case the Akuma decided to be faster than he was able to pull Marinette out.

Which, as Adrien noticed when he turned back towards the front of the house, was the case – unfortunately.

He gulped when the Akuma lifted her arm with the gas bomb and quickly got to Marinette, starting to pull her out behind the couch.

“Plagg!”, he yelled, already seeing the Akuma clicking the lighter to flicker on.

She threw the bomb and he didn’t have the time for Plagg to fully charge up anymore.

“ _Plagg, claws out_!”

The Kwami just rushed into his ring as the bomb exploded on the couch behind which Adrien crouched down.

The gas filled his lungs and he felt his eyes watering at the sharp, stinging sensation. The magic washed over his body and he hoped, prayed, he would be fully transformed before the Akuma would set the whole thing ablaze.

He bent over Marinette’s limp body to shield her from the hit as he heard the rushing, loud sound of flames igniting the gas in the room. It was a quick explosion and he felt the couch fly against his shoulder while he himself got ripped back, trying to keep his hold on Marinette but feeling her slip out of his fingers.

For the endless time of maybe a second, all he was feeling was the hot sensation of flames licking on his suit. All he was seeing was scorching white heat. His eyes burned and his body slammed against something before slumping to the floor as the wall of heat was over. He coughed blindly, his limbs not obeying him as he tried getting to all four. His vision was completely whitened, his ears tingling and his movements uncoordinated. He didn’t understand what had just happened. What had just taken place here.

He tried shaking his head but his body wouldn’t do anything. Only now he began seeing clearly again, even if his ears still let him hear a constant beeping noise. The couch had settled on top of him. They must’ve both slammed into the wall and he hadn’t even noticed the weight because of his superhero strength. The Akuma came floating in and grinned at her work, obviously satisfied.

“I killed her, Hawkmoth. Her and the boy.”, her eyes were fixed on something out of his view and he panicked. Did she-… Did she really succeed? Was Marinette dead?!

“Yes. I will go after Chat Noir now. I will not fail you, Hawkmoth.”

With that, the Akuma was off, not even suspecting that her target had been here all along.

Chat coughed and sat up when the coast was clear, pushing the couch off of him. Everything hurt and his entire body was trembling as his vision was freckled with dark dots because he had sat up too early for his body to adjust. He groaned and blinked a few times before trying to stand up, stumbling over to the window. The smoke finally lifted a little the longer the explosion laid back and Chat was able to see the crowd of people returning. Alya and Nino were up front, Nino just barely restraining his crying and sobbing mess of a friend as she wanted to run into the bakery. He kept yelling it was too dangerous and that she didn’t want to see what had happened but she just screamed and pleaded, all in one word. Her name. Marinette’s name.

Finally, Chat turned again and just then he saw Marinette, on the floor and unmoving.

“M-Marinette…”, he forced out as he fell to his knees next to her. Half of her body was buried beneath the other, smaller part of the couch, but luckily it had fallen upside down so that it put weight on her with the cushioned side. He quickly pushed the furniture off and turned her, cradling her head in his lap.

“Marinette?”

She didn’t answer. Her body stayed unmoving, her eyes closed and her mouth half opened. Chat felt a sob building up in his throat, as well as his eyes watering. He gulped away his tears and brushed a strand of hair out of her calm face, biting his lip. She didn’t flinch one bit at his touch.

“C-Come on-… D-Don’t do this to me… Marinette? Marinette! C’mon!!”

He started yelling before he even noticed it. His voice got louder, his shakes more desperate and he soon drowned out the soft crackling of the little flames that the explosion had left. He hugged her tightly, pressing his cheek against her forehead as he rocked back and forth, not wanting to believe that she was just gone. Even after checking her pulse, even after testing if she was breathing and having to realize that neither of them was present, he still refused.

She couldn’t just be gone. She couldn’t!

He whimpered and kneeled, lifting her up in bridal style before taking a leap out of the window with her in his arms, already seeing an ambulance rushing closer.

Chat barely heard Alya’s cry as she saw them over his own sobbing. He gently touched down on the ground and let Marinette’s lifeless form slide to the asphalt of the street, somehow finding that this surface was way too rough and hard for her.

Just when he straightened up again, still kneeling next to her, Alya reached them with Nino hot on her heels. They both fell down next to Marinette, Alya quickly checking what Chat had already confirmed. No heartbeat, no breathing. Alya’s head fell onto Marinette’s chest as she sobbed, her tone somehow having changed but Chat didn’t care. He had to pull Madame Cheng and Monsieur Dupain out.

And most importantly, he had to go after that Akuma.

Chat Noir stood, letting Alya and Nino take over, as he jumped back into the building where a few tiny flames danced around on easily set aflame fabric. He quickly put them out by dabbing them out, thankful that it had apparently been an easily ignited gas which was burning up just as fast as it came. Leaving not enough time to actually set something to flames.

With a quick push the couch was out of the way and he had access to the hallway where he had gotten Marinette’s parents to safety. The wall and door had luckily prevented most of the burst from the explosion so that they had been relatively safe. He pulled Monsieur Dupain on his shoulders and brought him down to emerge from the bakery at the front, already aiming for the next ambulance. The emergency doctors came rushing to him and asked him how many persons were still remaining in the building.

“Two.”, he said, “Madame Cheng and Adrien Agreste. The boy just woke up so I’ll be sending him out with the woman. I gotta go after the Akuma.”

The doctors nodded without asking further questions and he jumped back in, detransforming with a whisper.

“ _Plagg, claws in_ …”

The familiar green flash lightly blinded him and he immediately felt worse than before, now that his superhero strength was missing. He slumped to the ground next to the woman and sighed deeply. How would he tell her he had been too incompetent to save her daughter? How would he tell a mother she had just lost her child?

How would he tell her it was his fault? That he hadn’t been fast enough, hadn’t been good enough. That he was to blame for Marinette’s death, just when he had given them a chance with her again?

He didn’t know. And he wouldn’t know for a long time, probably.

Adrien sighed as his Kwami snuggled against his neck, trying to comfort him. But he didn’t need comfort. It wouldn’t matter anyway.

He gently locked his arms under Madame Cheng’s knees and back, lifting her up and grimacing at her weight. She was light as a feather but the guilt weighed down heavily.

He wouldn’t be able to endure her pain. He wouldn’t be able to see her suffering because she lost her child. He couldn’t.

As soon as Sabine was out and in the care of emergency doctors, he numbly turned to the spot where he had put Marinette down. The emergency doctors there were busy lifting her away on a litter, carrying her into the ambulance. Someone asked him if he was okay and he nodded absently, following Marinette with his eyes. He’d have to say goodbye. And worry about how to come to her funeral as both Chat as well as Adrien.

His gaze shifted again and he saw Alya and Nino still kneeling at the spot where Marinette had been after he had brought her out, tightly embracing the other like they were the only steady hold in their world. He gulped and went over to them, not exactly expecting them to jump up when they noticed him and hugging him as well. He sniffled and buried his face on Nino’s shoulder, his arms weakly finding their way around their waists.

“… ‘M s-sorry-…”, he finally cried, allowing his tears to fall, “… ‘M s-so sorry I wasn’t f-fast enough…”

He felt Alya shrug and hug him tighter, then Nino shook his head.

“Nothing to be sorry for, bro. She lives. Marinette lives and she’s going to be okay. It’s just a mild concussion and a few bruises as well as gas poisoning. She’ll be back up again in a few days.”

Adrien felt like there was a huge weight being lifted off his chest. He lost all tension in his body and just slumped against them, letting out his fears and worries in the form of tears.

His friends comforted him and whispered to him that she’d be okay, that they were so glad that he survived and that it’d be okay again. He absently nodded while he cried everything out, the tension, the loss of Ladybug and his worries about Marinette.

An angry teenager stayed back.

“I gotta-… Gotta go now…”, he said, clenching his teeth at the thought of what he had to do now. Alya and Nino looked at each other when he parted from them, furrowing their eyebrows.

“What? What’s so important that you’d need to go now? We need to get to the hospital, we gotta check on Marinette and her parents!”

“No, I-…”, he stammered, looking into the direction of where the Akuma vanished. Their gazes followed his and he shook his head, “… Home-… Wanna-… Relax…”

“Your home is that way, bro.”, Nino pointed in the other direction of where Adrien had looked, squaring his shoulders, “Listen, you’re keeping something from us. But if you wanna help Marinette I will not let you do it when you’re not honest. I will not let you get close to her until you spill.”

Adrien groaned and clenched his fists, fighting a staring battle with Nino until he had to look away.

“I can’t tell you. I’ll go now.”, he tried but Nino crossed his arms and huffed.

“Have you looked at yourself the past weeks? You’re exhausted, you’re always too late for everything and you can’t even think straight. I can tell you’re not going home and I won’t let you out of my sight.”

Adrien was ready to retort something he’d probably regret as Alya stepped between them with a soft expression.

“Nino wants to say we’re worrying about you. We-… We don’t want you to break down or something. Please come with us where we can care for you.”

Adrien’s gaze flickered down and he noticed Alya leaning her back against Nino’s chest for comfort. The hand of his best friend had already gone up to her hip, hinting to an embrace.

So this was what had been between them the past weeks. Their dynamics had changed.

He looked up again to shake his head, managing a smile.

“You’ll understand one day. But I really gotta go now. Stay safe, you two.”

“No, Adrien, wa-”, Nino began but Alya took a step forward and grabbed his wrist, holding him back and causing him to turn towards her again.

She caught his gaze and he immediately felt scanned. Under her searching eyes he shrank into himself and she slowly nodded. She knew. She knew it was him.

Adrien didn’t have any doubt she had figured it out. She had probably thought about it for months, maybe even years. He had known whenever she had interviewed him as Chat Noir, she had suspected it. The last months had probably been a final proof.

She had figured him out.

He let his hand slip out of her grip and she sent him a gentle smile, sad and somehow scared.

“Take care, Adrien.”

He had a feeling he wouldn’t be completely through. He’d have to talk to her about it and he’d have to tell Nino. He knew she wouldn’t tell him, even if they had gotten a significant bit closer to each other. But she wouldn’t just call him out, he’d have to do that himself.

And he was infinitely thankful for that.

“I will, thanks.”

He turned and walked away, patting Plagg beneath his shirt.

“We gotta go, buddy…”, he whispered, “Got enough energy?”

“Yeah…”, his Kwami whispered quietly and Adrien sighed.

“We’ll get through this no matter what. I’ll try to be quick and then you’ll get as much camembert as you want.”


	26. Chapter 26

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A hard fight but soft revelations.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here I am again! Yay, as promised, even if it's a little late :D  
> This time I don't have that much to say but even more to show sooooooo here I go:  
> Synovelle posted the third chapter on her story No More Fear, which is a fanfic inspired by Breeze. If you haven't gone to read it yet, do it now! It's a really good alternate continuation so please, enjoy!  
> \--> https://archiveofourown.org/works/12310566/chapters/27986010  
> Also, as a thanks, I drew the last scene from the first chapter for her so that's here, if you wanna check it out:  
> \--> https://awesomefreckledjesus.tumblr.com/post/166409334531/no-more-fear-since-i-already-got-so-much-fanart-i  
> Aaaaaaaand that's the last one, I got tagged by orangebunnit to do a "Meet the Artist". If you wanna take a look on how I draw and what I like and not like, here's a link for you :D (Not a face reveal but kinda a little?):  
> \--> https://awesomefreckledjesus.tumblr.com/post/166396588696/yeah-i-tried-d-thanks-for-tagging-me
> 
> Anyway, here's the new chapter, I hope you enjoy!

“I’m Gasmine and I’ll-”

Chat rolled his eyes at her and lifted his fist for another hit which she had to dodge before being able to finish her speech.

“I’ll defeat you and-”

He groaned in pain as she hit another time, stumbling back but now he finally found his voice again.

“Shut up already!”, he forced out before trying to jump at her again. She fled by floating up and kicking him in the back. Akumas with the ability to fly were so annoying.

He turned and his gaze flew to the periodic table that was stuck between her hip and belt. He narrowed his eyes and clenched his fists again. If the hairband hadn’t been it already, maybe it was the periodic table. Made sense.

He bared his teeth as she floated higher, the little hairs at the nape of his neck standing up. He hissed and grabbed his baton, vaulting himself up to reach her but once again, she was more agile than him. She quickly flew to the side, laughing at him when he began falling past her. He quickly did a roll on th street and got to his feet again, swearing at the light scratch that he got on his forehead from not coordinating his roll well enough. The Akuma cackled and stayed at the height where she was right now, looking down to him with a humored glimmer in her eyes.

“Let’s see how often we can repeat that, shall we?”

He grumbled and tightened his grip around his weapon but recoiled a little when a purple outline of a butterfly appeared around her face, hesitating. Hawkmoth talked to her right now and he certainly told her to take his Miraculous. She’d come to him.

But much to Chat’s surprise the Akuma stayed where she was, the butterfly framing her face and an evil smirk playing around her lips. Chat gulped as she lifted her chin higher, snarling down at him.

“What, are you feeling sour I attacked that Marinette girl? She deserved it. Wouldn’t you agree?”

The blonde bared his teeth and growled at her, his stance immediately changing to an aggressive one no matter how exhausted he was.

“Stop talking.”

“What would you say if I told you Hawkmoth saw how Ladybug died? He’s telling me right now. Wanna hear?”

Chat growled louder and tensed so that his body started to tremble.

“Stop talking _right now_!”, he said a little louder but the Akuma already continued.

“These hands, Chat Noir, her hands. They’re tiny, aren’t they? But they fit so perfectly around Ladybug’s neck.”

He tried biting his feelings down, tried ignoring the tears collecting in his eyes.

“I said _stop talking_!!”

He used his baton to vault himself at her again and this time she didn’t have a chance. He slammed her on the ground and dug his claws into her shoulders.

“Ladybug is so strong normally but-…”, she forced out, her teeth clenching, “… This time, she wasn’t… She didn’t have a chance. The grip on her neck deadly and her attempts to get out useless. She died with her eyes open and her movements slowing. She died with your name on her lips, pleading you to come and save her but _you weren’t there_! You weren’t there to _help_ her! You failed her, Chat Noir, you let her die and-”

“Shut _up_!”, he cried, slamming her on the floor again, “ _Cata-_ ”

A shock surged through his body as he realized he was holding up his hand, ready to strike her. He had been so close to using cataclysm at her that he gulped, stumbling back after taking the periodic table from her belt.

“She pleaded for mercy but Marinette didn’t give it to her. All because _you_ failed her. She trusted you!”

He felt tears flowing down his face as he ripped the little piece of laminated paper in two, catching the little butterfly with his bell. It turned silver as it fell back into his hands and he leaned his forehead against the small item. This had been too close.

Way too close.

The girl on the ground sat up and brought her hands up to her head, groaning.

“What-… What happened?”

He took another moment before clicking the bell onto his zipper again and kneeling down next to her.

“You got akumatized.”, he gently offered her a hand, his voice soft and understanding while his insides churned.

_No, you almost killed a girl I know_ , he thought to himself while her skin connected with his gloves, burning him.

“R-Really? Oh god… I’m so sorry, Chat Noir…”

“It’s okay.”, he lied, helping her to her feet and steadying her shaky form to bring her to a waiting ambulance just a few meters down the street, “Your Akuma blew up a bit stuff but it’s okay. Nobody died.”

_Not that I know of yet at least_ , he grumbled but kept his mouth shut.

“Oh-… Okay… Again, I’m so sorry, I-…”, she sighed and he shrugged.

“Don’t worry about it, uhm-… Jasmine?”

Her surprised gaze met his as he sat her down on the floor for the emergency doctors to check her through.

“How do you know my name?”

“Just a lucky guess.”, he managed a smile for her, a fake smile. A model smile, “Anyway, I’ll be off. Just try to calm down and be safe, okay?”

She nodded and he was about to jump away towards the hospital to which Marinette and her parents had been brought as her voice called him back.

“Chat Noir! Uhm-…”, he turned and looked at her expectantly.

“Yes?”

“… Thank you.”, she whispered and he felt his heart sinking, “Thank you for saving me. I didn’t mean to, uh-…”

“It’s okay.”, he said and this time, he meant it, “It’s kinda my job. Stay safe.”

With that he took a run-up and used his baton to catapult himself up to the roofs, beginning to run while the officials did the rest.

Though he was pretty sure his thoughts were moving faster than him.

_Thank you_ , echoed in his head _, Thank you for saving me_.

He swallowed down his tears as he swung around a chimney by holding on to it and using his speed to jump.

_Thank you for saving me._

Every single akumatized victim had been thankful for being rescued. Marinette… Marinette as well.

She had done most of the job, had helped him majorly, had tried to soothe him and all he had done was hurting her. Yet she had still been thankful. Neither as Chat nor as Adrien had she been hateful to. She had always been grateful for him saving her.

The impact of that thought almost let him stumble but he managed to stay on the roofs, continuing his way to the hospital. For now, he couldn’t let that throw him off. He had a job to do, a job for the whole of Paris. He had to concentrate on surviving.

And on trying to keep Marinette alive as well.

This was his first and foremost thing to focus on right now and oh hell he wouldn’t have mercy on himself if he failed.

 

* * *

 

Just a few minutes later he burst into the front doors of the hospital as Adrien, disheveled and exhausted but adrenaline still surging through his veins. But before he could even get into the waiting room where he already heard half of the class, Alya stormed out and grabbed him, pulling him towards the toilet.

Oh right.

She knew.

So, he just let her pull him away, down the hallway. Nino was about to follow but froze in the door as he saw Alya dragging his best friend away. His eyebrows furrowed and Adrien swallowed, just so managing a wave and an awkward smile as the headstrong girl took his collar, shoving him through the open door and kicking it close as they both were in.

_That probably looked very wrong_ , he just so managed to think before Alya pulled him down, her face close to his but her eyes directed to his forehead.

“You got hurt.”, she said as she already pulled out a tissue, finally letting him go.

“Uhm-… Maybe we should-…”

“Got it.”, she locked the door with a quick movement before turning to the sink, letting a bit of disinfection spray soak the tissue. He gulped but kept his awkward bent forward posture so she could carefully dab the wound on his forehead clean. It wasn’t big or anything but he had gotten it on the asphalt of the street so it should at least be clean.

He groaned a little as the stinging pain begun, caused by the disinfection spray on the tissue, but soon after it just felt good, a little cooled, making him sigh.

“No, I mean-…”, he begun again as she turned away once more, pouring a few drops of water on the other side of the tissue so she could soothe the stinging a bit and clean the wound up more.

“Shush.”, Alya said, short and sharp. He immediately shut his mouth again, closing his eyes. Her gentle fingers danced over the sore spot and he pressed his lips together. But he couldn’t keep it in anymore.

“Alya, seriously, we-… We need to talk about-”

“I know.”, she finally said, her voice quiet and soft as she worked around the wound on his head, “You wanna know how I figured it out. And you wanna know what I’ll do now that I know.”

He didn’t try nodding since he knew she would not approve of that (sometimes Alya could be even more terrifying than an Akuma) so he just sighed.

“Yeah…”, he finally forced out, hissing when she applied a bit more pressure. The tissue was another now, dry so she could stop the bleeding.

“Here, hold the pressure yourself. I’ll get the bandage ready.”

He watched her as she pulled out a bandage from her bag, putting just a bit of disinfection spray on that as well. Her hands danced and he was once again reminded just how much of a so called mum friend Alya had already been for the four of them. There was just that switch inside her that made him cherish her as a friend even more. Maybe because he missed his own mother. Maybe because he’s always wanted to have younger siblings like her. Or maybe just because he liked her getting caring like that. It was nice to be cared for.

He held the tissue to his forehead and grumbled a little at the pain but waited patiently as she rubbed the disinfection into the pad of the bandage so it wouldn’t hurt too much.

“I won’t do anything.”, she finally said. He looked up with wide eyes, their gazes finally meeting. Her eyes turned taunting and he gulped, “What, did you think I’d immediately pull out my phone and post it on the Ladyblog? You have enough to deal with. Hawkmoth knowing your civilian identity would’ve been a disaster and there’s no doubt he’s following the blog. A source about his arch nemesis? Surely an important thing for him. Sightings, theories, discussions, maybe even interviews. He can use anything against you. Why do you think I keep the Ladyblog so general? Almost sarcastically? To throw him off of course. And, well, to inform the people of Paris but don’t you think I don’t know who can look my page up.”

He was dumbstruck as she removed his hand with the tissue, gently applying the bandage around his head while continuing.

“And hey, I’ve read enough comic books to know how important it is that these two identities stay away from each other. Spider-man’s had problems with that and don’t even get me started on Iron man. So of course I’ll keep it a secret. I always wanted to find out your identities for myself, not for the public.”

“B-But-… A-Aren’t you-…”, he stuttered before clearing his throat, “… Aren’t you surprised it’s been me?”

She stayed silent for a while. Her hands put just enough pressure on the bandage so that he felt comfortable and he closed his eyes as she began speaking again.

“Not really, no…”, the girl finally said, shrugging lightly, “I’ve suspected it shortly after you became Chat Noir already. I even edited photos of you, drawing a cat suit on you. It-… I dunno, but it stuck with me. And then the last months, when you reacted so completely different than anyone else and-… Gradually, as your health became worse and so on… It became more and more undeniable that you must be the same boy who’s been running himself ragged and who’s been fighting to the point of a breakdown since-…”

They both hesitated at the wordless reminder of what happened a few months ago. The silence weighed heavy on them so she quickly continued.

“Well, and when somehow Adrien and Chat Noir took turns today and-… And when you were about to run towards the fight-… That was crucial for me. All I needed was your confirmation, that was your look right before storming off. Then I knew for sure.”

The boy gulped and nodded, feeling her finishing wrapping his head in the bandage and then taking his hand. He looked down to see her fingers ghosting over his ring.

“Well, now that I know for sure it’s kinda-… Obvious. Why you reacted like this. And how you must be suffering under this like nobody else…”

He sighed and shrugged, keeping his hand relaxed so that she could inspect the ring.

“You tell me about it.”, a high voice suddenly said and Alya recoiled, jumping back against the door with a bang. Plagg floated out of his jacket, crossing his tiny paws, “He’s been whining about that for months.”

Adrien bit his lip as he saw Alya’s chest heaving up and down in panic, her eyes fixated on the Kwami. For her it must be a giant shock. Her voice died in her throat and her gaze jumped from the black cat to his holder, some unintelligible sounds escaping from her lips.

“Uhm, Alya, that’s Plagg. He’s a Kwami. He’s providing me the power to transform. Plagg, that’s-”

“I know, I know. That reporter girl.”

“Her name’s Alya, Plagg. Behave.”

His Kwami merely shrugged before turning back to Alya, a grin, playing around, letting his whiskers jump a little.

“So you figured my kid out, huh? Respect. Not man mortals can see so well through the magic.”

Alya’s hand slowly reached for the door handle but Adrien acted before she could do anything, ducking through underneath Plagg and grabbing her shoulders, locking their gazes together.

“Hey, are you okay? You were so fine with me as Chat, why are you freaking out now?”

“W-Well-…”, she tried, “F-For one that’s a floating cat, two it can speak and three, what the frikkin-…”

She choked on air as Plagg moved next to Adrien’s head, tilting his head.

“I-… I guess that-… Makes it a bit more-… Uh-… Real?”, she slowly calmed down again the longer she kept her gaze on the Kwami, obviously getting used to this, “And, uhm-… I didn’t expect it, that’s all.”

Adrien nodded, letting go of her again so she could straighten up again, stepping to the sink and letting cold water splash into her face by cupping her hands and bringing them up. When she was done she already looked a lot better.

“O-Okay, I can deal with that. Hi, uhm-…”

“Plagg.”, Adrien helped her out as she held out a hand to the Kwami.

“Hi, Plagg. I’m Alya.”, the Kwami took her index finger and winked at her.

“You know, you could’ve been some good chosen as well. I like you.”, he said and Adrien’s jaw fell open as Alya grinned back.

“Me as Chat Noir? That would’ve been cool. But I doubt I would’ve been as good as Adrien. I think you’re better off with him.”

The two chatted a bit more before Adrien finally found his voice again, unbelievingly looking back and forth between them.

“You’re being _nice_ to her?!”, he choked out, his incredulous gaze locked on his Kwami, “You’re _never_ nice!”

Plagg merely shrugged and grinned as Alya laughed.

“I have a few sides on me that you don’t know, kid.”

Adrien just so managed a pout before the other two continued with their conversation again.


	27. Chapter 27

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Many reliefs but again, a mean time to stop.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It worked!! Yay! :D  
> So, this chapter is the lead up to something really emotional, then we're gonna do a little time skip in the next few and, well, the angst train is closing in~  
> So enjoy the calm situations while they last ;)  
> Enjoy~

They had settled more or less comfortably on the hard, tiled floor, Plagg sitting on Alya’s knee while she interrogated him. Adrien had just curled up against the wall for a little dozing around until they’d join the rest of the class in the waiting room.

Though, as he was just on the verge of falling asleep, Alya had asked all questions that she had for now and silence ran through the room. Adrien opened his eyes again and met Alya’s gaze so he tilted his head.

“Mh?”

She merely shrugged and leant back against the wall, closing her eyes as well.

“I’m just-… How long did you manage to keep this a secret? I mean… A superhero in my class? Right in front of me? I even suspected you but-… I didn’t really believe it until-…”

“Today?”, Plagg helped.

“Yeah.”, she nodded, “Today…”

Adrien hummed and followed her example, closing his eyes again to relax a bit more.

“Y’know-… We’re kinda on the same level here-… I noticed that you and Nino-”

“Mh.”, she immediately interrupted him. He opened one eye to check how she meant that but since she stayed still he continued.

“Uhm-… You seem-… Closer… Are you?”

Alya sighed and shrugged again, still keeping her eyes closed. Like this she couldn’t see the smirk on his face as he saw a small smile playing around the corners of her mouth.

“Yeah… I think we are. Well, like, as in-… We’re friends. We’re-… I guess we got closer when we started trusting each other more. Y’know, when I realized Mari’s not at fault.”

He nodded, his hair swishing along the tiles on the wall.

“Huh, yeah…”

“We just started-… I dunno-… After the panther cage thing I really thought we could-… Y’know?”

“Everyone thought that. Including Nino.”, Adrien snorted.

Alya nodded slowly, lowering her head to rub over her face.

“I guess, yeah… But he never made a move. I mean, we went to the movies two times and-… And that was it. So, I thought ‘Hey, let’s hope for nothing’ and it kinda-… Worked? We became great friends, don’t get me wrong! And I really like him, still, and I wanna be with him and-… And hug him and tell him everything and so on but-… I just don’t feel like we’re-… Compatible for a relationship right now… With all that’s going on and-… We just gotta concentrate on different things. And as much as I like him, I just-… Don’t see him in a relationship right now. Well, I _wanna_ kiss him and stuff and maybe that’s just me, that I’m reluctant, but-…”, she sighed, turning towards him with a smile, “I just like what we have right now. That’s the most we can do without adding more to the pile we’re dealing with. I can cuddle him and tell him everything I need to and-… It’s relaxed. That’s what I need. And that’s what he needs.”

Adrien silently listened and then briefly nodded, his thoughts keeping him from talking. In his mind he played her words over and over again, slowly understanding what she meant.

_That’s what I need, what he needs._

Adrien had felt the exact same way when he had brought home Marinette. He had needed her to be safe and she had needed him to bring her home. In more than one way. She wouldn’t have done it on her own, she wouldn’t have managed.

“What you need…”, he repeated, finally making eye contact again, “It’s what you need.”

She shot him a quizzical look before slowly agreeing.

“Uhm-… Yes…? It’s what we need. Are you okay?”

He gave her a smile and nodded.

“Yeah, I’m fine. So, you and Nino are happy like this, right?”

She became a little uncertain but he gave her a reassuring smile, encouraging her to answer.

“Uhm, yeah. At least right now. Maybe something will come out of this, maybe not. Who knows…”

He chuckled and stood up, much to her confusion.

“Yeah, who knows…”, he echoed, his thoughts still lingering on that evening with Marinette, “Anyway, I think we should get going. Nino saw that you pulled me in here and I think we should get back to him.”

She gasped at the memory and her gaze turned horrified when she took his offered hand to stand up.

“Oh my god… That must’ve looked so wrong…”

Adrien smirked and opened his jacket for the Kwami to fly in and hide.

“Well, yeah. It probably did. And besides, I wanna know if there’s anything new about-… Uhm-... Actually…”

She hesitated, her hand on the door handle.

“What?”

“When-… When Chat-… Uh, me, when I-… Fought the Akuma-… She told me how-… How Ladybug died and-…”

Her gaze turned soft and she let go of the door, stepping close to him and hugged him tightly. He melted into the embrace and sighed, resting his cheek on her head.

“You can’t help but blame Marinette again. Right?”

He nodded, ashamed of what he felt, but she only brushed up and down his back.

“It’s alright.”

“But-…”, he tilted his head more towards her, “I-… I don’t wanna feel like that. Just-… I can’t help it. I just-… What the Akuma said-…”

“Shh…”, she soothed him, tightening her arms around him. He immediately felt better, “… It’s okay. I know how hard it is. I know it feels horrible. But you always gotta keep in mind, it wasn’t Marinette. It was Miss Fortune. She did all of this, not Marinette. Two different persons.”

He sniffled and slowly nodded, grabbing on to her shirt. The hug felt comforting and warm and he never wanted to part from her again. They both just stayed like this for a few minutes, giving the other reassurance and warmth. It relieved Adrien probably more than he wanted to let on that she knew now. It meant that he’d have a companion, someone like Ladybug, a support. He could tell her how exhausted he really was and how much he suffered under this.

He could talk to someone else than Plagg, he could open up to her and he could have someone to support him, something he had yearned so desperately since he stood alone against Hawkmoth.

Just when he wanted to tell her all that, though, someone knocked on the door and before Alya and Adrien could react, yanked it open. Alya had unlocked the door before hugging him.

Nino stood in the frame and Adrien immediately let go of Alya but the damage had already been done. His best friend’s eyes narrowed as Alya turned around to him and Adrien gulped, quickly putting his hands behind his back. Nino straightened up and slowly nodded.

“Marinette’s awake.”, he briefly prompted, pressing his lips together as he let them out.

“She is?”, Alya asked, facing him as she stepped out into the hallway, pointedly avoiding looking at Adrien.

“Yeah. But I’ll go home, I’m not feeling well.”, he buried his hands in his pockets, already taking a step back, “You two go see her.”

Alya shook her head and gently touched his elbow, stepping closer to him. Adrien could see the expression of his best friend shifting to a softer gaze as her other hand came up to his arm as well. Adrien couldn’t suppress a smirk. His best friend was utterly and completely in love and he would happily take all the blame that Nino might think wrongly of them. Though he doubted that Alya would leave any uncertainties. For that, she had been too honest back then.

“You stayed by her side all these months. If anyone should see her it’s you. Seriously, Nino, you need to stay. Not only because of yourself but-… Also because of me. I’d say something dumb again. Please.”

Nino sighed and shrugged, managing a small smile. Adrien had only seen him smile like that in tenth grade, for Marinette. Or, well, when he had looked after her.

But Adrien knew this small smile, knew the soft expression in his eyes. He knew that look.

“Okay. I’ll stay.”, his best friend finally said.

 

* * *

 

The room was quiet and darkened as Marinette opened her eyes. She blinked and looked around through bleary eyes, slowly beginning to realize where she was and why she was here.

Memories started drippling back and making her squirm as the droplets turned into a waterfall. She squinted her eyes and tried bringing her hand up to her head but recoiled at the uncomfortable tubes connected to the crook of her arm. She quickly checked her arms and sighed in relief when she saw that the doctors and nurses had left the bracelets on. She looked up again, clenching her teeth at the thought of the sharp smell of gas, at the booming voice of the Akuma and the helpless feeling of losing her consciousness.

Her parents had been there. Her parents! They must’ve lost their consciousness as well!

She tried sitting up but a nurse in the corner of the room, just finished washing her hands, stepped to her side. She hadn’t realized she wasn’t alone. The nurse pressed a button and gently pushed Marinette back onto the mattress, giving her a reassuring glance.

“You are in a hospital, Ms. Dupain-Cheng. You’re alright and your parents are as well. They’re still unconscious but they’ll wake up within the next half an hour, they’ll be just alright. Chat Noir saved you.”

She slowly nodded, coughing a little when she settled back against the pillow again. Her voice was raspy and hoarse as she spoke up, breaking off at the end of the sentence when her air ran out.

“… The-… The ba-… Bakery-… How-…”

The nurse took her hand, smiling softly.

“It’s okay. It’s a little banged up but it stands. Nothing one day of work can’t fix. You’re lucky the windows were already shattered, like this the gas escaped too fast for the fire to do any real damage except the shock wave from the explosion. But it’s okay.”

Marinette’s eyes widened as she heard from the explosion for the first time, her heart immediately beginning to thump quickly in her chest.

“… E-Ex-… Explosion…?”

The nurse nodded but her expression stayed calm and collected.

“Yes, there was an explosion. But nothing really happened. I was told the furniture is intact for the most part and only the windows took damage. It was a very small explosion. Don’t worry.”

The bluenette slowly nodded, trying to relax but found herself unable to. How much had really happened? Were her parents in the room with the explosion? What about the Akuma? What about Chat? Was he still fighting or did he manage to defeat another Akuma?

She shook her head at too many questions, her thoughts running way too fast for herself to follow. But before she could clean up her mind and properly sort out what she needed to know and what not, the nurse spoke up again.

“There are a few visitors for you. I think it’s your class since they look like they’re the same age as you. Should I let them in all at once or one at a time or give them an excuse to see you tomorrow?”

Marinette stilled and unbelievingly caught the gaze of the nurse again.

“They’re-… They’re here…”

She nodded.

“Yes. Would you like to see someone?”

The girl gulped, her eyes jumping to the door and back to the nurse. Who did she want to see? Why were they all here? What-… No.

Focus.

Who did she want to see?

Whoever she imagined, no matter who she thought about, her mind went always back to Nino. He had been the one to stand by her since everything started and he had always tried to protect her. Though she had never even thanked him for that.

“… Nino-…”, she whispered, “… Nino Lahiffe… Alone, please…”

The nurse nodded and left the room, probably to get Nino. Marinette leant back a bit more, staring on the ceiling. What would she say to him? How could she thank him for something that a mere ‘thank you’ wouldn’t be able to cover?

 

* * *

 

They had just returned to the waiting room as the nurse followed them in, searching their faces.

“Nino Lahiffe?”, she asked and Nino stiffened, subconsciously taking Alya’s hand.

“Y-Yeah?”

The nurse smiled at him and waved him closer so he let go of Alya’s hand again after one last squeeze and stepped forward.

“Marinette Dupain-Cheng is wishing to see you, alone. If you could follow me, please?”

He numbly nodded and turned around to see Adrien and Alya encouragingly nodding. Alya even gave him a small smile so he smiled back, straightening his shoulders.

“Okay.”, he said, “Thank you.”

The nurse led him through the hallways and he felt more and more nervous the closer he got to Mari’s room. The closer he got to her.

“Alright, here we are.”, the nurse prompted, pointing at a door, “I’ll leave you two alone. If you need something, push the button on the wall, next to her bed. That’s all.”

He swallowed, gave her a grateful nod, and then opened the door and stepped into the room.


	28. Chapter 28

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The drama picks up again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not even sorry for how crappy, short and late this is because THE FIRST TWO EPISODES OF SEASON 2 CAME OUT!!!  
> OH GOD I'M FREAKING OUT!!  
> Oh well, and university kept me busy but that's gonna get better, it was just the first week that'd be so straining.  
> And the next chapter is gonna be very long, very heavy on plot and I guess I could water the sahara with your tears then. Soooo bear with me, next chapter is gonna be better ;P

When Nino stepped into the room he didn’t know what he was expecting to see.

It was so obvious to Marinette that she recoiled as his gaze flew around in the room to finally settle on her, locking their eyes together.

She held her breath as he trudged closer, hesitant, uncertain. His back was bent forward, as if he was-… Scared?

“Mari?”, was the first thing he said, dared to say. It wasn’t a greeting. It was the question if a greeting would be okay.

“Hey Nino…”, she replied in a shaky voice, trying to reassure him that it was okay to approach her. She wouldn’t run, she wouldn’t snap closed again. She’d listen and talk.

He came to a halt next to her bed, now looking down at her. She hated that she was still in a lying position, that way she wasn’t able to show him she was okay with staying. It looked like she was forced to stay.

“… H-Help me sit up?”, she tried as a few moments had passed, neither of them moving.

But he shook his head, instead grabbing a chair to sit next to her.

“You shouldn’t sit yet. Not after what you went through…”

She sighed as she adjusted her head so she could comfortably look at him, then she waited a few moments before speaking up again.

“How-… How’s Alya…?”

She could see him suppressing his tears at that question and she asked herself if it was the same matter as with Adrien. That she still cared about her former best friend.

“… She’s okay. Worried about you but okay.”

Marinette slowly nodded, casting her gaze up to the white ceiling.

“… Okay… Nino, I-… I wanted to talk to you…”

The boy sighed and leant back a little, nodding but not pushing. He knew she needed a bit of time and he would give it to her. She was incredibly grateful for that.

“I-… I wanted to thank you…”, she continued after breathing through, closing her eyes, “For-… For the past months…”

He slid a bit closer and shook his head, propping his elbows up on the side of her bed, causing the mattress to sink in a little.

“No need to thank me, Marinette. I should thank you for staying strong, though.”

She sighed and turned her head towards him again, slightly shrugging.

“I had no other choice… I can’t tell you, why, but-… I need to stay strong.”

Nino didn’t ask why she didn’t tell him but she could tell he was curious. The way he observed her expressions, the way he tensed when she opened her mouth and the way his eyes flickered around in the room before settling on her again gave him away. He just knew her too well. Well, what else could she expect from her childhood friend?

“… How’s-… How’s Adrien?”, she murmured, her fingers fiddling with the blanket.

“He’s okay. Well, I would’ve liked to see him here sooner, but otherwise okay.”

She tilted her head at his words, pushing herself up a little so she could at least lie a bit straighter.

“Hm? Why?”

“He-…”, Nino hesitated, looked at the door. She could see he was troubled, “He ran into the bakery… To save you and your parents.”

Marinette felt like the bed was vanishing beneath her. Adrien had run into a house which was attacked by an Akuma to save her?! Where did this suddenly come from?

“O-Oh-…”

“Nothing happened to him. Chat Noir saved you all.”, he mumbled, looking down.

Marinette felt dizzy. This was too much, way too much. She tried closing her eyes at the shock so that the room would stop swimming but it didn’t help.

Chat Noir had saved her? Why had he-… She had only hurt him! She had lied to him, hurt him and rejected him. She had no right to be saved by him!

Marinette’s head spun and she breathed faster, sinking into the pillow. This wasn’t right. Nothing was making any sense. Why the sudden change? Why was everyone suddenly caring about her?

Her hands became sweaty and she began shivering while her head became numb, her vision swimming. Nino’s voice sounded to her like through a wall. This wasn’t making any sense.

She squinted her eyes and pressed her lips together, faintly hearing how Nino stood up and called for someone. The door opened and she opened her eyes again, looking over to see someone in white clothes rushing towards her before she slumped back, her body going slack.

 

* * *

 

“Nino? What’re you doing here?”

As the boy stumbled through the door into the waiting room, Alya knew something was going on. Especially when she saw his awfully pale face. She stepped to him and steadied him on one arm with her hand, the other lifting up to cup his cheek. His gaze found hers and she gulped at his expression, softly brushing over his cheek with her thumb.

“What happened?”

She felt Adrien stepping behind her but her gaze stayed on Nino. He just slowly shook his head and then closed his eyes, leaning his forehead against hers.

“We-… We should give-… M-Marinette more time… She fainted…”

“What did you do?”, Adrien immediately asked and Alya tensed at his tone. Both her and Nino turned to the blonde, furrowing their eyebrows at Adrien’s frown.

“What did you do to her?”, he asked another time, his voice becoming pressing. Alya could see his fists clenching and unclenching and gulped as she felt Nino’s jaw working under her fingers.

“Adrien-…”, she said in a warning tone but his gaze was fixed on the boy in front of her. They stared at each other for a few moments before Nino gently grabbed Alya’s shoulders, pulling her out of the way before surging at Adrien. He grabbed his collar and slammed him against the wall, tears building up in his golden eyes.

“No, what did _you_ do to her?! I didn’t do anything, I just told her what _you_ did and she fainted!”, His grip on Adrien’s collar tightened and the blonde’s eyes widened.

“Wha-”

“Damn right! So my question is, what did you do to her, huh?! Was she awake when you ran in?! What did you do?!”, Adrien’s mouth opened but nothing came out, shocked at Nino’s behavior. Finally, Alya broke out of her frozen state and hurried next to them, placing a hand on both their shoulders.

“Nino, let him go!”

“No, he’ll tell me what he did to Marinette! What did you _do_?! What did you do when you found her?! What’s fucking wrong with you?!”

“I-… I didn’t-…”

“I’m not stupid, man! I’m not fucking stupid! So tell me now or I’ll-”

Alya forced herself between them and managed to get Nino’s hands off of Adrien’s collar. She protectively held up her hands, standing with her back to the model.

“Nino, stop. Please.”, his glare shifted from Adrien down to Alya, his eyes narrowing, “Adrien didn’t do anything. She was already unconscious when he got there. The Akuma had already attacked, remember?”

Nino’s gaze jumped between them and his expression got hard. Not angry, not disappointed. Just-… Taunting.

“Oh…”, he whispered, “… So this is it.”

Alya gulped and stepped a bit closer to him, keeping her hands lifted.

“… Nino?”

He just shook his head, narrowing his eyes, and turned around to leave. Eyes widening, Alya quickly surged forward, catching his elbow and holding him back with her mere touch.

“Nino, wait, what-…”

He pressed his lips together and faced her again, pointedly avoiding to look at Adrien. His eyes got a little softer at her look but his body stayed tense.

“I’m going now.”

She shook her head, more as a plea than a demand.

“Nino, please… Please, it’s not-”

He snarled and wrinkled his nose, huffing and pulling his arm away.

“No, no, I think I know. It’s fine, don’t worry. And stay away from Mari.”

With that he turned around again and vanished out the door in the hallway. His steps just so died down when he exited the hospital as Alya moved. She walked, first slowly, then faster until she ran after him. Within the blink of an eye she was out of the waiting room and all Adrien could hear of her were her steps and a cry, Nino’s name. He sunk into himself after a few moments and slumped on a chair. His friends were gone, his classmates had all gone home when they had been told Marinette was awake not to overchallenge her and he was the only one remaining.

He buried his face in his hands and waited a while. And another while.

When he looked up again it was afternoon. He remembered having gotten here a few hours ago.

Three? Four?

He groaned and stood up, his back sore and his arms hurting. Marinette wouldn’t want to talk to him. She probably wouldn’t even wake up anytime soon… He sighed and stood up.

She wouldn’t want to see him. He hurt her.

Alya and Nino probably wouldn’t want to see him as well.

 

* * *

 

It took Marinette three days to get back to her feet. To her luck, Chat Noir had shielded her enough with his body to take the brunt of the explosion.

When she got back home with her parents everything still looked a little banged up but an anonymous donator had payed to clean it up again. Her parents first hadn’t wanted to accept that but the donator wouldn’t let them talk with him.

She took another two days off of school to recover a little but she spent most of the time in her room, trying to wrap her mind around the sudden changes in the behavior of her parents and former friends. Nino and Alya tried visiting her a few times but she would only talk to Nino and her parents.

The drastic change scared her a little so she didn’t want to open up too much.

Adrien didn’t once check on her. She was mostly grateful for that but it also irritated her a little. Why did he go from ignoring her to worrying and caring and then to ignoring her again? It confused her to no end.

Just what was it with all these changes? What did she miss? Why had Chat Noir made a public statement to keep her safe? Why were her friends changing their minds in a matter of a few days? Why, why, why?

The weekend came and she slowly warmed up to Nino and Alya. The dynamics between them had changed again, since last time she heard of them.

They were pretty awkward around each other by now, almost tense. Marinette didn’t know what had happened between them to be so-… Almost weird to each other. Almost as if everything they said could break the thin ice they were standing on.

None of her friends had been allowed into her room. She had requested that since she still felt unsafe around them. She wasn’t sure about their true intentions and while she dearly hoped it was true what they said. Though she rather stayed careful. She could never know when they decided to change their mind again.

So she stayed skeptical. She had to protect herself. With Hawkmoth knowing who she was, with the unstable feelings of her former friends, with Tikki still in Hawkmoth’s hands and with Chat Noir still not trusting her. She had to stay strong and careful.

Even if Alya pleaded her to speak to her through a closed door. Even if she saw Nino’s gaze meeting hers from the other side of the street.

Even if her heart told her otherwise when she saw Adrien’s blonde head vanishing inside the school.


	29. Chapter 29

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One drop might sometimes be enough to provoke a storm.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it.  
> The chapter I was talking about.  
> This is the chapter with the attempted suicide tag. It's finally here.  
> I'm sorry in advance for the topic.  
> If some people do not want to read things like this because of various reasons I'll put the name of the character committing suicide in the notes at the end. Please do keep in mind that you have been warned through the tag that's been there from the very beginning, through the notes here and the general rating and the warnings of this story.  
> I'm not gonna lie, this chapter is exactly what I promised and warned it to be. It's containing graphic depictions of violence and deals with the matter of death and self-inflicted injury (beforehand as well). If you can't or don't want to read it, please don't.  
> I am not responsible if you decide to read it.  
> Also, I do not support this kind of solution for a problem. Suicide is not the right way and I do not think otherwise. What the characters do in this story is their decision and purely fictional. Please do not try this at home, seriously.
> 
> Anyway, to get away from all the warnings I feel obliged to say, it's finally here!  
> It was supposed to come so, so much earlier but here it finally is :D  
> Sorry not sorry for the cliffhanger, deal with it until friday ;P  
> Enjoy~

One whole week had passed. One whole week of failed or chickened out attempts to talk to her. Every time Alya would walk up to the bluenette, Marinette would either flee or Alya would lose all her built up confidence.

Because every time she would look into these blue eyes, Alya would have to swallow back her tears. The images of her unmoving body on the street right after the explosion flashed behind her own eyes every single time she caught Marinette’s gaze. And every single time when Marinette saw Alya, she looked scared and would try to get away from her to avoid her former best friend, probably because she feared the brunette would try to approach her like last time again.

But the day after Marinette had come back to school, Alya noticed something.

Something had been off these last few months. Alya hadn't been able to put her finger on it but once she realized that it occurred to her with all the force it had.

Her new bracelets.

They were broad and covered her whole wrists, in contrary to the one she had made her which Marinette constantly kept in her hands, playing with the halves. They were beautifully handmade and quite pretty, actually. The brunette had thought about them as simple decorations rather than a cover, a disguise for something.

But this one day, a tissue had peaked out from one of them. And the tissue had been red on a corner. Marinette had quickly stuffed it back in but Alya had seen it. Firstly, she had been confused. But after thinking about it for the rest of the lesson, her eyes widened.

Depression, isolation, alcohol abuse... Of course, after some time _this_ had to follow.

The bell signaled the beginning of a 15-minutes-break and Marinette quickly left the classroom, as usual. To get away from Chloé, from everyone, as fast as possible. But this time, Alya wouldn't let her.

She knew Nino had said she needed time. She knew she shouldn’t confront her now. She knew all that. But she was scared. She couldn’t just sit by and do nothing, that wasn’t her personality. Adrien had stopped trying to care for Marinette in the fear Nino would lash out on him again and Nino wouldn’t confront Marinette about anything. Sure, she had done what Nino had advised her.

She had held open doors for Marinette, had left small treats on her desk, had tried including her in group works and had given her the time to approach her herself. She had been submissive and hadn’t tried making eye contact with the bluenette when she obviously didn’t want it. She hadn’t stared, hadn’t talked to her when Marinette hadn’t spoken up first and hadn’t tried talking to her about the last months. Or any other topics that might’ve upset her.

But she couldn’t just have seen that and do nothing. She couldn’t, that wasn’t her.

She got out from behind her desk and started to follow Marinette.

“Nino, please get my stuff for me. I have something to take care of.”, with a glance over her shoulder as she left the room, she saw Nino's eyes going wide. He knew who she was after.

Luckily for her he didn’t follow her. He was probably scared for their friendship, as was she. It felt like talking to someone made out of glass when talking to him. One wrong word and she felt everything she had built up with him could crumble.

She had seen in his gaze, though, that he thought what she did was wrong. She couldn’t blame him. It probably was.

Fifteen minutes. The clock ticked.

The girl ran out of the classroom only to see Marinette wanting to leave the schoolyard.

“Oh no, you don't.”, Alya muttered to herself, racing down the stairs before other students could even leave their classrooms. She reached the bluenette as she was halfway down the stairs in front of the school. She didn't notice until Alya grabbed her wrist, pulling her down the stairs after her. She heard Marinette yelping at the sudden touch by another person and the pain that shot through her arm.

Quickly, the brunette pushed the smaller girl into the bushes in front of the school, not letting go of her former best friend’s wrist. A tear of pain had escaped the girl’s eyes and went down her cheek, as Alya held her wrist in her hand, bringing it between their faces.

“I know, what you did, Marinette.”, she hissed, letting it sound harder that she had intended it to. She pressed her fingers as tight as possible around the bluenette’s wrist. It resulted in a cry of pain. The breeze of her yelp brushed over Alya’s face and she clenched her teeth, already being sorry for doing it.

She let go and watched as she brought her wrist to her chest, clutching it to her body along with the faded bracelet in her hands that Alya had made.

“I know everything's been hard for you and honestly, I regret what I did to you. And I'm worried about you, too. But this-...”, she pointed to Marinette’s wrist that shook of pain, “This is too much. Don't you know the scars will stay? Forever?”

Marinette didn't show any form of response. Instead she just stared at Alya in shock, as if she had just told her that Ladybug was still alive.

She assumed it was the first time since Marinette has been accused of murder that someone had noticed what she had done to her. Sure, her parents knew she’d been drinking, not how much but they knew, and sure, Adrien, Nino and her had seen it. They had seen her running away, spending whole nights outside and even been there when she had been drunk.

But this?

She sighed, reaching out to take Marinette's arm softer this time. The girl in front of her flinched away first but then she let her, her eyes never leaving her former best friends face in disbelief.

“At least let me see how bad it is if you're not gonna talk to me.”

She carefully removed the bracelet and took in a sharp breath through her teeth. There were multiple cuts spread across Marinette’s wrist. They looked different each, as if some of them were a few weeks old while others seemed fresh.

“You've got to be kidding me...”, Alya whispered as she turned Marinette’s arm to see if there were cuts on the outside of the arm too. Just as many red lines were revealed, a little deeper than them on the inside.

Suddenly, the arm was yanked out of her hands. Surprised, Alya looked up and found Marinette's expression had changed. She had snapped out of her trance and looked angry although she was still shocked.

“You shouldn’t have seen that. Leave me alone!”, she quickly hid the cuts under the tissue and her bracelet again.

“I-… I realized that I've been a horrible friend and that you shouldn't be blamed for what happened to-... To Ladybug. So-… P-Please give me a chance… I’m sorry.”

Marinette was caught off guard by Alya's sudden confession and took a step back. She couldn't believe what she heard.

_Alya actually was-... sorry?_

The bell rang and Marinette took another step back from the taller girl.

“I-... I've got classes to attend to...”, she repeated herself, using the exact same words she used as an excuse to get away from Adrien a few weeks ago. Trembling, she ran off.

The conversation was too much for Marinette, it was too many emotions for her. She couldn't do that just now.

As she dashed into class, Alya just came back onto the schoolyard. So she had enough time to sit in her seat and rearrange her bracelet, because as she'd put it on in front of Alya, she'd hurried to leave this place in an instant. Her former best friend just sat down as a catastrophe started to take form.

Chloé had seen the blood smeared tissue.

Alya didn't notice as the blonde stood up but as she walked past her, a breeze of her sickly sweet perfume washing over her face, she knew something really bad was about to happen. Swaying her hips, she slowly approached Marinette who still fumbled with her bracelet, trying to put it on properly again so that nobody would see. She didn’t seem to realize, that Chloé made her way towards the end of the classroom. Even Sabrina remained on her seat, frozen in fear of what was bound to happen.

The eyes of the brunette widened and she was about to jump out of her seat but was too late – Chloé stood in front of Marinette who finally looked up.

Her face was so full of hate and morbid satisfaction as she reached out for Marinette’s hand and snaked her fingers around her wrist who was trembling of fear and tension because of what’s about to happen next. With a hard squeeze, the bluenette cried out in pain and clutched her arm on her elbow. Chloé didn’t seem to let go anytime soon, so Alya finally got to her feet and wanted to get to the two of them… Until the blonde spoke up.

“I didn’t know you’ve fallen that deep.”, she whispered sharply, applying even more pressure to Marinette’s arm.

“Chloé, don’t…!”, Alya started, but one gaze of the girl made her shut up. Chloé just laughed and turned to the other girl again, snarling at her.

“Who do you think you are, trying to pretend you’re the victim? Don’t you know murderers _never_ are the victims?”

She turned to face the whole class now, a gruesome grin playing around the corners of her mouth. Chloé ripped down Marinette’s bracelet and revealed her arm to everyone. The bluenette tried to break away but with no success. Chloé had an iron grip on her arm.

“She killed Ladybug! She doesn’t deserve to even feel like she’s the victim here! She killed Paris’ greatest hero and Chat Noir is on his own now, helpless and overrun by Akuma! They’re rampaging around in the city and are destroying buildings and streets and Ladybug can’t create her healing light anymore, so every damage stays! I’ve even heard of some deaths and these people can’t come back because of you! You hear, Marinette?! You did all of this, all of the destruction, people hurt and dead, you should be held responsible for this! You killed Ladybug, so you’re the one to blame!”

Nobody moved as Chloé’s voice constantly became louder. She yelled at Marinette who sunk into her seat even further with every accusation the blonde threw at her.

“You’re worthless. You’re to blame for everything that has happened! You didn’t just murder Ladybug, you also murdered civilians and there are more to come! And you’re responsible for every single one of them! You should go to jail, Marinette Dupain-Cheng! In fact, I’ll just go to my daddy today after school and then you’ll be reported to the police as multiple murderer and-”

Alya yanked Chloé back on her shoulder and had to swallow because of the similarities on that day everything had fallen apart.

“It’s not her fault, Chloé!”

Everyone’s eyes narrowed as Alya stepped in. She noticed tears in Marinette’s eyes but she would have to deal with that later.

“And you know that very damn well! Marinette’s not to blame, it’s Hawkmoth! So leave her alone and go back to your seat.”

“Who are you to talk to me like that?! By the way, it really _is_ her fault! She’s killed Lady-”

“Don’t you dare saying that again! It’s not her who killed Ladybug! It was Miss Fortune! And now FUCK OFF!”, Alya stood with her hands on her hips and angrily frowned, her chest heaving up and down.

Chloé just huffed and walked off, throwing a “She’s not worth it anyways” over her shoulder while doing so. The brunette turned and her face softened at the sight of the scared girl in front of her.

“Marinette, you okay?”

Her friend trembled while she followed Chloé sitting down again with her gaze. Alya knew she thought about her words.

“Marinette, don’t listen to her-…”

“No, it’s alright. She’s right. I’m responsible for this.”

Alya’s eyes widened as she realized that Marinette actually agreed on the horrible things Chloé had said.

“No, Mari, it’s not-”

“It is. Ladybug is dead. And I am responsible. I am to blame-…”, Alya slowly began to shake her head, “… G-Goodbye.”

The bluenette stood up and grabbed her bag. With tears streaming down her face she hurried down the stairs past all the desks and only stopped at Alya’s call.

“Marinette, wait, don’t! You are not-”

“Shut up, Alya! Nobody believed me when I said that Ladybug’s not dead! And now, she will be! You convinced me! Ladybug’s never coming back, ever!”

Alya froze and could only watch as her friend left the classroom. She knew, the bluenette did have something in mind, she knew that look on her. And it was something Alya had to prevent, at all costs.

“Marinette, wait!”

She ran past Adrien’s and Nino’s desk, Nino had already stood up and was about to follow Marinette too, but he remained on his seat as Alya rushed away. She shot a look over her shoulder just as Nino turned his gaze to Chloé, obviously pissed off. Adrien looked startled.

Then, Alya bumped into someone and fell to the floor, wincing as her head slammed into the doorframe of the classroom.

Miss Bustier glanced down at her and offered a hand to help her up.

“Alya, class is about to start, don’t you want to come in again?”

The brunette shook her head violently and Miss Bustier released her hand.

“Why won’t you come back in?”, she asked, leery.

“It’s about Marinette! I have to help her! She’s in danger and I have to prevent her from doing something she and everyone else will regret!”, with that, Alya stormed off, down the stairs and out of the school.

 

* * *

 

Marinette wiped away her tears as she ran across the street, towards the bakery. She didn’t even hesitate as her mother called after her from inside the bakery as she was already up the stairs. She ran into the kitchen and snatched a big knife, burying it in her schoolbag. She ran down the stairs again, holding up her pencil case.

“I forgot this, bye Maman!”

“But didn’t you have it with you this morning?”

Marinette stopped. She didn’t know how much time she had until Alya would come and look after her.

“I forgot it anyway… Uuh, so, Maman?”

Her mother looked up, tilting her head in surprise.

“Yes, sweetie?”

“G-Goodbye.”

“Uhm-… Goodbye?”, Sabine shook her head, “Anyway… We’ll see each other after school”

Marinette managed a sheepish smile.

“Yeah. Sorry, gotta dash!”

Her mother smirked and waved her as Marinette turned.

She stumbled out the door with the sudden relief that she had managed to make her mother smile that last time when she had brought nothing but grief in the last few months. The heavy feeling settled in her gut that she hadn’t managed to tell her she loved her but she just couldn’t. A warm breeze went through her hair as she began to run.

She found the little alley she’d been drinking and cutting in. She sat down on the wall and brought the knife to her arm, on which her other fist was closed firmly around the bracelet Alya had made for her. She knew what was about to happen.

She knew she wouldn’t be able to return. She knew Ladybug would never come back.

But she saw no point in remaining here.

She couldn’t take on Hawkmoth on her own and Chat didn’t trust her anymore, even when he had started protecting her from people who had tried to kill her. She supposed he just didn’t want them to be imprisoned because of her. Nobody trusted her anymore.

Alya had today, but Marinette knew it wouldn’t last long. Sooner or later she would change her mind again and turn her back to her. The bluenette couldn’t take it anymore.

She was Ladybug, but everyone had drawn her to the point she herself believed Ladybug was dead.

She supposed she was the murderer of Ladybug after all.

So she laid the knife onto her arm, cold metal on soft, warm skin. And with a jolt, she pressed the knife into her flesh, yanked it away and stared at the deep gash that opened up. She could see the raw flesh inside her just the moment before the blood started welling out.

Now, she panicked. Of course, that’s what she wanted. But her instincts set in and told her to apply pressure to the wound.

The cut was too deep and too long for her to stop the flow of blood down her arm, onto her pants, and the asphalt she was sitting on.

Soon she felt dizzy and left the knife clattering to the ground. She heard a faint cry, her name. It was Alya, but she knew it was too late. Her eyes closed and she laid back against the wall. Comfortingly cold darkness embraced her and she heard footsteps, running past the alley.

But she didn’t care anymore, she didn’t care and let herself slip into the welcome unconsciousness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The attempted suicide tag is (partly) meant for Marinette.  
> If you did not read this is all you need to know, until the next chapter!


	30. Chapter 30

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things are taking a rapid turn.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, new chapter :D  
> Now that the attempted suicide is out of the way we'll all be more relaxed, huh? ;)  
> Anyway, I had one person blaming me in the comments that I didn't make the warnings clear enough since they'd be ignored by many readers because they're in the Notes so I just wanted to ask real quick, did anyone except that one reader not feel warned enough? If so, I'll update it.  
> Anyway, here's the new chapter and Imma warn like that reader told me to.
> 
> *blank line*  
> TRIGGER WARNING: Blood and injuries.  
> *blank line*
> 
> Better? ;)  
> Okay, I've been petty, now we can continue.  
> Enjoy~

Alya barged through the door in the bakery and judging by Sabine’s look, something was very wrong.

“Alya? Is everything alright?”

She shook her head, immediately sending a frown over the face of Marinette's mother. She knew, she had to be fast now.

“Where's Marinette?”

“She said she would go back to school.”

“She isn’t at school. Did you notice anything weird?”

Sabine walked past the counter and put two hands on Alya's shoulders. It calmed the girl a bit but she still tensed up with every touch.

“No, nothing. Is anything wrong, Alya?”

The brunette shook her head again, making Sabine tilt her head.

“I've got to find Marinette. She could be doing something she doesn't want. I'll inform you when I found her, alright? When was she here?”

“Just minutes before you came. Maybe five?”

Alya nodded this time, gripping tighter at the strap of her bag. She gently removed Sabine’s hands and opened the door again.

“Thanks. I'll be right back when I found her.”

When she was outside the door again she trembled harder than before. Nothing at all? Were her suspicions wrong? Could Marinette be up to something entirely different? What was that girl planning? Did she have to worry? Well, of course she had to worry! But-… Maybe for something else? Before she could collect her thoughts, someone ran into her, sending her to the floor a second time that day.

“Oh my gosh, I'm sorry Alya! I didn't see you coming out. Did you find Mari yet?”

Alya glanced up and saw Nino standing there, holding out a hand to help her up. She gratefully took it and let herself be lifted to her feet by the boy, all tension between them forgotten.

“No, she must've run off. Have you got any trace?”

Nino clenched his teeth and negated. Alya felt tears welling up in her eyes.

“We're going to find her, Alya, don't worry. C'mon, let's search for her. She isn't at school so she must be in the streets somewhere.”

They looked for their friend for at least half an hour before Alya broke down. She knew, Marinette could be anywhere by now, so they had no chance in finding her anymore. Paris was huge and if they just took one wrong turn their chances were zero. And she knew, her friend could be very fast if she wanted to.

Alya sat on her knees, looked down the street through clouded eyes and wept as she let herself fall into Nino's embrace. A breeze ran over her wet cheeks, making them feel cold. The alcohol, the cuts...

Alya didn't like what Marinette could be up to.

Nino picked her up and held her close to his chest. She could hear his own ragged breathing, both from running after her and sobbing. He knew as well what Marinette must've done. She soaked Nino's shirt with her tears, not being able to hold back anymore. She might've lost a friend, might've lost Marinette today.

Silently they turned in the direction of the bakery again, defeated.

But as Nino walked past a little alley, she smelled something metallic, something bad. She stopped and looked up to Nino, already fearing the worst. Of course, in Paris with every ten steps the smell changed, that was normal. But this was something Alya couldn't quite ignore.

Alya wriggled herself out of his grip and took a little step towards the alley, the boy right behind her. They slowly approached the garbage bins and looked around them and-...

A scream escaped her lips. Then another. She couldn't help herself. She yelled and screamed and went back until she touched the wall in her back. Her foot brushed over the asphalt and created a sound of grinding that sounded way too loud in the little, silent, _too silent_ alley. She brought her hands to her mouth but wasn't able to contain her screams or close her eyes.

Her elbows brushed against the wall and she felt the rough bricks against her skin. She felt one nail dig into her lip. One shoe bumped against the wall and the rough surface of the wall poked into her back.

She wouldn't be able to forget in a lifetime what she saw right now.

Nino already had his trembling hands on his phone, calling an ambulance. He was being helpful, was somewhat calm and collected and told the guy on the other side of the phone everything he needed to know. He was told to not hang up so he could direct the ambulance to their location. But Alya didn't care.

Nino swallowed, kneeled down in front of the motionless Marinette and checked her pulse on her neck, murmuring something into his phone and nodding. Alya didn't understand a word he was saying. She just knew she had to get out of here.

As fast as she could she ran to the street and leaned against the wall, feeling like throwing up. People were looking at her and whispered to each other but she didn't care, she didn't care what they had to say.

The teenage boy ran out too, only for his face to soften when he saw Alya still standing there. He told the other guy on the phone something and then hugged her. He didn't let go when the ambulance arrived and when they offered to take them to the hospital too. Nino held her close until they arrived in the hospital, pressing his cheek to her hair and sneaking something into her hands. But she was too shocked to process anything right now.

She heard him talking to Marinette's parents through the phone and noticed when they came to the hospital, opening the doors and letting a light breeze sweep through her hair. She heard him assuring her parents that both girls, her and Marinette, would be fine. The bluenette was being stitched up and stabilized at the moment and Alya was in shock but they would both be okay. Her parents immediately stormed off with a doctor to see their daughter and Nino remained in the waiting area with the brunette.

By now, she was out of tears. She just breathed into his shirt, drying her tear stained cheeks and the wet spots on the blue fabric. Nino gently stroked her hair as Adrien arrived. She didn't expect him to come but she assumed he worried way too much for her to care that he had wanted to stay away from her, because of Nino. Well, the boy hugging her didn’t mind seeing Adrien. It was like all their conflicts were forgotten in the seriousness of this situation. In favor of Marinette.

If they wanted to support her they couldn’t be fighting with each other.

Alya couldn’t quite see how he must feel right now. Did he blame himself? After all he as Chat Noir and as Adrien had a double role to play in this. Did he feel like he needed to be there for Marinette as both? Did he feel like he needed to apologize to her as two different persons? She frowned. She wouldn’t be able to bear that.

Doubled guilt weighing down on her, the guilt she already felt doubled? She gulped and lightly shook her head. No, she couldn’t imagine how he must feel right now…

Maybe partly because she could only inspect him with one eye. Because she was still pressed against Nino’s chest. She didn’t mind though, she actually enjoyed it.

Nino was warm and comfy and made her forget the world around her, especially the pictures she couldn’t ignore so easily.

Marinette laying on the ground, curled up in a fight against her pain.

Marinette bleeding heavily.

_Marinette._

Marinette, her best friend.

Or at least, Alya hoped they could be best friends again. Maybe when she realized Alya wasn’t meaning any harm. Maybe when the brunette showed her the best she could. Well, okay-… She had already told her twice and both times it had been the worst possible idea…

Damnit, Alya wasn’t good at this.

She sighed and in an instant, Nino’s hand squeezed her shoulder.

He did that everytime she indicated she was still alive. Whether she sobbed or sighed or nuzzled closer against him. It was a symbol of affection, a sign of support.

Adrien talked with Nino at the moment and she slightly smiled at the soft drumming of his deep voice against her cheek. She heard him hesitate and shortly after, Adrien joined the hug from behind Alya. Suddenly she was squished between the two boys and had to stifle a laughter, partly because she was smaller than both of them and because these two hugged. She had barely seen them hug, only one time after a pretty rough Akuma attack and it had been Adrien tackling Nino because he had been hit by an arrow. Of course, Ladybug had fixed it with her cleansing light, but still.

Nowadays one shouldn’t exactly be hit by anything anymore, Alya suddenly thought. Ladybug was no more and even though Chat Noir was doing his best to keep everyone safe, Chloé had talked about deaths. Nothing could be magically fixed anymore.

She decided to ignore that fact.

Chat Noir – _Adrien_ – would keep them safe and everybody was always in danger, be it an Akuma attack or a simple car speeding.

She felt distant bells ringing in her head as she thought about Ladybug being no more but she didn’t know how to connect it to anything. Marinette finally saying Ladybug was dead? Maybe she didn’t deny it anymore and that had partly triggered the suicide attempt, her realizing she, no, _her Akuma_ , had been a murderer. Something felt wrong about that but whenever she tried pinpointing it something blocked. She didn’t know what it was but she couldn’t focus on that anyway.

Instead, she snickered and nuzzled Nino’s chest what Adrien felt too.

“Very manly hug, you two.”, she murmured.

Two deep voices vibrated in two chests on both her ears. It were honest laughter, ones she hadn’t heard in a long time. Against all odds and although her hopefully-best-friend had been found by Alya after a suicide attempt, she joined into the laughter with her higher voice, creating a soothing symphony with what had been long desired.

They released each other but Nino kept an arm around Alya’s shoulders as they sat down. Now she got a glance at the object Nino had pushed into her hands right after stepping out of the alley. It was Marinette’s bracelet, the faded colors looking somehow sorry for what they had to witness. Especially because they were soaked with a certain red liquid on some places.

She leaned her head against him and felt a breeze of his breath and a quick peck onto her hair.

With closing her eyes, the situation seemed not so dramatic anymore. She could’ve been in school now, with Adrien and Nino chatting about classes and what had happened after he had followed Alya to go search for Marinette. With relaxing her tensed shoulders, she couldn’t open her eyes anymore and grew sleepy very quickly.

“It’s okay, we’ll wake you when something happens.”, Nino’s calming voice right by her ear gave her the assurance she needed before she could slip away.

The girl lazily nodded, felt him adjusting himself next to her, then she dozed off.

 

* * *

 

As Marinette awoke, everything felt heavy.

Her arms seemed to weigh a few tons and there was pressure on them. She felt bedsheets, felt a blanket over her, somewhat silky and light…?

They had no such fabric at home. Especially not with such a smell, it was not the washing powder her mother used. No, something wasn’t right here. What had happened?

Slowly she opened her eyes and was instantly blinded by the whiteness of the room.

Lights, bright lights everywhere!

The bed she was laying in was white, the walls were white, the lamps, the furniture – which was scarce, by the way – the technical equipment…

_Wait, technical equipment? Don’t tell me I’m actually in a-…_

Marinette opened her eyes again and was prepared for the brightness this time so she could look around a bit more.

_The smell-… Yep, hospital. What happened?!_

“Honey, c’mere, quickly! I think she moved!”

Her father? What was he doing here? And apparently her mother too…

“Sweetie? Marinette, can you hear us? Go get a doctor, Tom!”

She opened her eyes again, only to look at her mother’s worried face. She only caught a glimpse of her father’s incredibly worried expression before he left the room to get someone. Outside she heard other voices she knew but couldn’t quite place them yet.

“Maman? Wh-… What happened?”

Her voice was hoarse and felt like she had used it too much in the last hours.

Her mother let out a choked sound, almost sounding like a sob.

“Sweetie, you-… You’ll get told soon. Just don’t move around too much. You lost very much blood and we don’t want you to fall unconscious again.”

She nodded, her throat suddenly feeling very dry and raspy.

“C-Could I have water, please?”

Her mother eagerly nodded, helped her sit up a bit and gave her a glass of water which stood on the little table next to her bed. Her hands shook which made Marinette suspicious but she didn’t want to ask yet, because first, she needed to drink something.

When the glass was empty she gave it to her mother who almost dropped it to the ground. She laid down again and paid more attention to the expression of her mother. She seemed… Shaken. Almost scared.

“Maman, is-… Is something wrong?”

Sabine laughed but it sounded like she had something eating up her voice. She negated and took Marinette’s hand.

“Everything is fine again. Soon your father will be back with a doctor and tomorrow you’ll come home with us and we’ll have a long talk with tea and cookies and we’ll help you no matter what, sweetie. Sound good?”

The younger bluenette was confused but nodded.

“Uh-… Was-… Was there someone outside I know? It sounded like I knew their voices…”

“Don’t worry, they’ll be allowed in right after you answer a few questions to the doctor. Then you can see them, if you want to. It’s Alya, Nino and Adrien.”

Her eyes widened. Nino, okay, she had expected him. He hadn’t left her side the last few days. She could also have guessed Alya would be here. The girl had tried talking to her right before her memory stopped. She had discovered-… Marinette looked down to her arms and gulped. There were big bandages around both lower arms. She faintly suspected what she had done but she unbelievingly denied it. She couldn’t have tried-… Right?

But Adrien? After his sudden change in behavior when the vigilantes had tried to kill her he had begun ignoring her again. Why? And why was he here then?

She nodded slowly, still trying to wrap her mind around it, as the doctor stepped in. Again, she heard the voices and this time she was able to recognize them, but she paid no attention this time. The doctor asked her parents to leave the room. Why-… Why would he do that? She tried asking him to let them stay but they both moved to the door. Hesitating, but they did without questioning, as if they wanted to keep her stress level low.

_What had happened that made everyone so paranoid?_


	31. Chapter 31

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She smiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a very, very important chapter.  
> I don't wanna spoil too much here but it's taking a really important turn, a complete 180. Finally ;)  
> Btw, I wanted to thank you all for your kind comments :) You all said I warned thouroughly so I don't think I'll change anything in chapter 29. Thank you so much, this really cheered me up and reassured me. Thank you guys, you're the best! <3  
> For now, enjoy~

The doctor, a middle-aged man with a few grey streaks in his mouse brown hair and a relatively thin body type, sat down in the chair Marinette’s mother had been sitting in before, a soft breeze from outside clinging onto him. He smiled, then quickly checked the screen on the machine next to her before he turned to her again.

“Marinette Dupain-Cheng, right?”

“Yes…? Nice to meet you, erm-…”

“I’m Dr. Mendes. Hi, Marinette. Can I call you Marinette?”, he held out a hand which she took, sitting up a bit with his help. She nodded at his question and suddenly became nervous. Did he want to tell her what had brought her here?

“Do you remember what happened, Marinette?”

She shook her head, leaning against the pillow propped up behind her back, confused.

“I remember being in school, and Chloé…”, she quickly carried on at his questioning look, “Well, Chloé Bourgeois, she’s a classmate of mine. She humiliated me-…”

He nodded and noted it on his tablet he had brought with him.

“Why did she do that?”

Sighing, Marinette told him. Since the day everyone had accused her of murdering Ladybug up until she came to the point to when her memory failed her. She purposely left out the topic Ladybug, that she was still alive. His questions why she believed that would be too hard to answer, to painful.

She ended with Chloé’s accusations and bit her lip.

What had she done that had brought her here? Of course, she had thick bandages around her lower arms but that only left the slight suspicion that something horrible must’ve happened. That she must’ve done something horrible. Well, maybe they had just discovered her cuts and that had been it, maybe it was something entirely different. Maybe she drank something again. Maybe someone attacked her? Poison?

He had thrown in a few questions while he had listened to her story, but while she had told him everything that had happened he had mostly remained calm and quiet, noting a few things he needed to remember afterwards.

“Dr. Mendes?”, she asked, nervously rubbing her hands together, “What happened? And-… What did I do?”

He looked up, surprised that she hadn’t figured it out on her own by now, she assumed.

“Well-…”, he began, “According to your mother, you came home from school and ran upstairs to get a pencil bag that you claimed to have forgotten. She thought it was unusual because at school you only need your notebook and the pencil that works with the touchscreen, but she didn’t question it.”

Marinette tilted her head in surprise, confused.

“I-… I did that? What happened next?”

“According to your friends Nino Lahiffe and Alya Césaire who found you in a little alley near your home, you had taken a knife of your parent’s kitchen with you. You already had experience with cutting and this time you, well-… You attempted suicide.”, his gaze was careful at her reaction and he only continued as she nodded at him, “It was about half an hour after you leaving the bakery when your two friends found you and immediately called an ambulance to take you to the hospital. You had lost very much blood already, and to be quite honest, your attempt almost succeeded. It was a close call, but you hadn’t cut open an artery, so we had you out of danger relatively quickly.”

Marinette’s mouth hung open and she tried to swallow but her throat felt dry again. She instead nodded and lowered her gaze to the thick bandages.

“Oh.”, she murmured.

“I am here to find out if you are still in danger of hurting yourself. And I want to hear your opinion. I want to help you, so it would be only for your best to answer honestly. Do you still feel like you do not want to live in this world anymore?”

Her head shot up and she met his gaze, a worried but serious shimmer in his hazel brown eyes. Slowly, she shook her head.

“You know, I had a hard time. Everyone told me I had killed Ladybug and everyone stopped trusting me, started segregating me, started-… Ignoring me. I felt sad, misunderstood and-… So very alone. In my pain I didn’t realize my mother and Nino wanted to help me. I looked into the mirror and saw a girl falling to her pieces. I was-… Devastated, broken even.”

He nodded, lightly brushing her hand to encourage her to continue. She sniffed, brushed away a tear and lifted her head to look at the ceiling.

“I had nobody to look after me and nobody to trust anymore. I was all alone, all by myself with a burden nobody wanted to help me carry. Finally, they – my classmates, all the other people on the streets, even my own father – had drawn me far enough to believe I was completely alone. That-… Well, my father and two of my friends changed my mind but I was beginning to think I really _had_ killed Ladybug, even when I constantly told them that she was not dead. I wanted to forget so badly I started drinking. The problem was that I had nothing to say against the accusations, no matter that I kno-… Uh-… How hard I denied it. Additionally, they thought it was a lie, me-… Uhm-… Denying her death. So I could somehow fix everything, because I was obviously desperate. When Ladybug didn’t show up anymore it was clear to them I must’ve been lying and because nobody really trusted me, I had no support anymore. Ladybug was dead and I was her murderer, end of story. I was accused guilty even when it was Miss Fortune controlling my body and Hawkmoth my mind. I couldn’t have done anything to prevent it, but they didn’t – or didn’t want – to see. I don’t blame them though… They needed someone to let out their mourning and anger because Ladybug was dead. And because Miss Fortune had vanished, I was there to be punished. I’m just grateful nobody except Chloé actually tried to make me go to prison, because luckily, every akumatized victim enjoys law immunity due to being mind-controlled by Hawkmoth. Every crime they commit falls into Hawkmoth’s responsibility.”

He looked that up in his notes to verify her information, then comforted her by stroking her hand again. She bit on her lip and nodded.

“I started cutting myself because I wanted to overshadow the pain I received from the people that had been so dear to me, because I did not understand why I was hated so much when I was loved before. Everything had fallen apart and after I transformed back from Miss Fortune, it felt like I woke up in another world. Of course I thought of suicide before that, but-… I guess I still had hope. The time wasn’t right. Someone had to become aware of my helplessness. And I knew a friend of mine was in great danger, so I had to hold on. I had many reasons not to do it, still have them now. But at some point-… I just kinda gave up.”

He once again compared that to his notes.

“So I let myself fall into a world I could not return from until-… Until Alya had first opened her own eyes, then mine. I recognized my best friend again when she said she was sorry and I was overwhelmed by the sudden wave of gratefulness and emotion, so I fled. Things happened that distracted me from thinking that again but when Alya apologized a second time, I-… It was the same all over again. When I got to the classroom, my head wanted to explode. Everything started to form into something new, my memories seemed to rewrite themselves, I started to realize I had my best friend back, or, well, I hoped. I started to see how much my mother had tried to help me, started to understand how much Nino had shielded me from the attacks of my classmates. How real Alya’s and-… Even Adrien’s feelings of-… Of regret had been. I started to see my situation from a completely different angle and I realized there was a way out of this. I started to see the affection again, it was like a ray of sunshine through a heavily clouded sky, like a breeze of warm air over one’s face in winter.”

She laid back her head and closed her eyes, imagining how it relieving it had felt for her. Dr. Mendes had laid his tablet next to her leg now and fixated her face with his gaze, taking in and studying every move and every expression of her now, but she didn’t even notice. It felt liberating to say everything out loud. It didn’t matter to her anymore that he sat there and listened.

“I had hope again! My thoughts were running with a mile per hour, flooded my mind like an avalanche and Alya had brought the movement.”

He encouraged her to continue her confession, his notes now long forgotten.

“Then, Chloé suddenly yanked up my arm, breaking my train of thoughts full of hope. She brought me back to bad thoughts, brought me back to every little doubt I ever had. Chloé not only rubbed in that I was the murderer of Ladybug once again, no, she also stated that I was responsible for every death that had happened because of the Akuma attacks that occurred after Miss Fortune’s – my – attack, because I had killed Ladybug. Thus, she obviously couldn’t create her magical light again and couldn’t undo the damage, couldn’t heal the hurt, couldn’t have prevented any deaths. I-… I kinda snapped. Every positive thought was sought out of me, like it had been with Hawkmoth’s possession. Suddenly, I was the insecure, broken, drunk, sliced open, little girl again, sitting in the dark alley, praying that her parents won’t find out about who had stolen all the alcohol, fearing that the groups of people who wanted her dead didn’t find her. I didn’t think anymore. I just-… I ran out of the school and had this-… This solution. A solution in which I wouldn’t have to put on with the weight on my shoulders anymore. And then, apparently, everything happened like you said.”

A sudden silence filled the room as Dr. Mendes tried to process her feelings she had just laid out in front of him. She gave him the time he needed and breathed in and out to calm herself.

“And-…”, he hesitatingly asked, “How do you feel now? About your burden, about your… ‘solution’, as you called it?”

She smiled.

“Let’s just say, I have another plan now. I realized I have people by my side who still value me, so I have to bring back Ladybug.”, she met his gaze confidently and smirked as she saw the big question mark in his expression, “It’s easy. I just need a chance to talk to Chat Noir and then – well, okay, hopefully – Ladybug will be back. She may not be the same as before, but she will be twice as powerful and Hawkmoth will experience that when she lays her hands on him for making all of Paris feel that awful for months. And he will be rather sorry.”

Dr. Mendes still had a questioning look on his face but nodded.

“I wish you good luck with your plan. I will talk to your parents now to talk to them about you taking weekly talk therapy, but I don’t think we need to do it more often. How you opened up to me that easily directly after a suicide attempt is remarkable. Most patients snap close like a seashell when I try to talk to them. Weekly meetings will completely do, I believe.”

He held out a hand and she gratefully took it, ignoring the stinging pain beneath the bandage.

“Thank you for listening, Dr. Mendes. It was a pleasure for me to talk to you.”, she politely replied. He smiled as well.

“As it was for me. Do you want to see your friends while I talk to your parents?”

“Could you send in Alya first? I want to talk to her alone… She must be very shaken up if she is the one who found me.”

 _And she tried apologizing to me-… I should really clear that up first_ , she thought.

The doctor nodded, then turned and opened the door. Flustered voices buzzed into the room as he walked outside. The door closed behind him, only to be opened again seconds later and a very pale Alya stepped in.

Her gaze was glued to the ground while she closed the door behind her, obviously afraid to see her best friend in the state she had found her in. Of course she didn’t expect Marinette to be all cleaned up and even have slightly reddened cheeks. Finally, the brunette looked up and her eyes widened as she saw Marinette smiling and waving for her to come to her bed. It was all clear now in Marinette’s mind. It was like a fog had lifted and she had resurfaced from a very, very long dive.

The bluenette saw tears welling up behind Alya’s glasses and reached out with both her arms to embrace her best friend. Slowly, the girl took a few steps, still uncertain.

“I’ve not had enough blood yet to hold up my arms long enough, so c’mere already!”, Marinette laughed. It was an honest laughter, and a liberating one as Alya joined in with her.

Quickly, the brunette was at the side of her bed and stepped into her arms, resting her chin on Marinette’s shoulder. Her best friend brought a breeze of amazingly calming scent to her nose, so she smiled and wrapped her arms around her, not able to swallow back her tears on her own as Alya started sobbing.

“I-I thought I had l-lost y-you-…!”

Marinette nuzzled her face into her best friend’s hair and smilingly noticed that Alya’s scent hadn’t changed over the months. She shook her head and sniffled.

“And I thought, I had lost _you_ , you big dummy.”

Alya tightened her embrace around her fragile best friend and sobbed even louder.

“Never _ever_ d-do that to me ag-ain anytime s-soon, girl. You sc-scared me!”

She laughed and ran soothing hands over Alya’s back and through her hair.

“I scared myself too. Who knew I was capable of doing that, huh?”

The brunette in her arms huffed at that under tears and she felt her shaking uncontrollably.

“I’m sorry I pushed you away like that-… I was overwhelmed and didn’t think properly…”, she quietly continued, sniffling.

Alya shook her head and hugged her tighter, assuring her it was okay. It would be okay now.

They just held on for a few moments, neither of them wanting to move or break the embrace or even speak. Sometime later Nino came barging in, curious how Marinette felt now. The two girls just rolled their eyes but let the two boys come in, both smiling.


	32. Chapter 32

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And finally, the fog has lifted for the storm to come.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the chapter Synovelle waited for :D  
> Yep, it finally happened, girl! The thing you screamed at me for ;P Now it's here!  
> Hope you'll enjoy~

After Alya had given Marinette back the cleaned-up halves of her bracelet, they asked about Marinette’s hard time in the last few months and how she felt about all that now, so she just told them what she had told Dr. Mendes already. Alya started to cry countless times all over again and both Nino and Marinette assured her everything was going to be different now, with a smile.

Marinette felt like she had woken up from a very bad dream. Looking back, she couldn’t believe she did some of these things.

Adrien remained silent and didn’t even look at Marinette, so she talked with the other two. But soon, Nino fist bumped Adrien’s shoulder and laid an arm around Alya’s waist.

“Dude, we’re gonna get some tissues. Look after Mari while we’re gone, will ya?”

Something laid in Nino’s voice that made Adrien finally lift his gaze. He looked surprised at Nino’s offer, even a bit shocked, but his best friend just gave him a small nod.

Marinette didn’t know it was a big gesture between the two boys, coming close to life-changing.

He still didn’t meet Marinette’s eyes but it was a start. And of course she knew what her two friends were aiming at, just not much more. Though, even if she didn’t understand the So as soon as they were out the door, she decided to be honest with him.

“Look, Adrien, if you don’t want to be here, I can totally understand if-”

“No! No…”, he finally spoke up, interrupting her midsentence. It occurred to him in that exact same second that it could’ve been rude, eventually.

“I-… I mean-… It’s not like I don’t want to be here.”, he quickly continued, his gaze glued to the ground again, “I _wanted_ to check on you, to make sure you were better. It’s just that-… Nino, uhm, he-… He kinda didn’t want me to be here…”

Marinette furrowed her eyebrows, shaking her head.

“He just-…”, and trailed off, obviously confused.

Adrien nodded, shrugging.

“I dunno either.”

He still didn’t meet her eyes. His shoulders were hunched and she huffed.

“… What is it really?”, she asked and suddenly knew, she had him there.

“It’s-…”, he began, uneasily rubbing his shoulder, “It’s-… Not-… It’s not that easy to look into your eyes…”

He finally had said what bothered him and Marinette smiled sympathetically.

“It’s fine. You know, I had the exact same problem. I couldn’t look into my own eyes because I saw something in them that scared me. Just-… If you tell me what it is that scares _you_ , I might be able to help you.”

He bit on his lip and brought a hand to his neck, ruffling the hair at the back of his head.

“I-… I fear I might see Ladybug in them. No offense, y’know, but Miss Fortune had been inside _your_ body, so she had had your eyes-… And she k-ki-… Saw Ladybug d-… Gone.”

The smile slipped from her lips and she brought the hand that had reached out for his shoulder to comfort him back to her chest.

“I-… I understand-…”

She listened to the footsteps outside the door and decided it was safe.

“Adrien, I am not lying. Ladybug is not dead. I didn’t see her die.”, technically, she did, but he wouldn’t understand, “My eyes are not the eyes of a murderer. Miss Fortune lied to turn my life to the worst. You have to believe me.”

She didn’t know why she told him that. It was mostly just the feeling that she could trust him. The way he had reached out for her, the-… The way she once cared about him? She didn’t know, she really didn’t. But she _felt_ that he _needed_ to know. He, as the one next to Chat Noir, _needed_ to know.

His gaze shot up and he met hers. Then, he opened his mouth but he couldn’t bring himself to say something. Instead, he stood up and paced back and forth.

“If she’s not dead, where is she? Is she hiding? Is she captured by that maniac Hawkmoth? How do you know she’s not dead? I-… I thought Akumas didn’t remember their akumatization.”

Marinette bit her lip. Even if she felt like he needed this reassurance, even if she had decided that he needed  to know Ladybug was not dead, she couldn’t tell him that the very same Ladybug was sitting in this room, on her bed, with two thick bandages around her lower arms.

“She’s-… alive. She is. I can’t tell you more, I’m sorry…”

Adrien’s eyes closed and he brought his hands up to his face, rubbing over it. He looked so defeated like this, so disappointed.

“I’m really sorry, Adrien.”

“Why’re you telling me this if you can’t prove it to me?”, was his reply. She gulped but straightened up a little.

“You-… I felt like you needed the reassurance, Adrien. Maybe just to make you feel better.”

She couldn’t explain why, Adrien knew. But she only meant well.

So, before she could process anything, he hugged her, a breeze of his scent brushing over her surprised face.

She felt like swallowing her tongue and an incredible feeling welled up in her stomach. He tightened his embrace and she leaned against his shoulder, bringing her arms up to his back, hesitatingly.

The girl felt him lean his head against hers and her chest grew warm, something, she hadn’t felt in months. Instantly, her mind came to a rest and she was able to breathe through again, relaxing. She melted into the hug and sighed quietly, turning her head and pushing her nose into the fluffy hair on the nape of his neck.

She felt _accepted_ again.

He lightly smiled as he pulled back and said something.

“… Huh?”, Marinette replied, losing herself in his radiant green eyes.

“Thank you, Marinette.”, his voice was soft and his face calm. She pressed her lips together, trying to keep her eyes open. His hug had calmed her so much that she felt like someone had wrapped a blanket around her mind, “I think I might feel better.”

She couldn’t think anymore. He probably didn’t mean it. Probably just wanted to assure her, to soothe her. But she didn’t care. It felt nice.

“G-Good.”, she stuttered.

Then he slightly leaned in.

Her gaze flickered down and his thoughts seemed to rush while hers were absent from work. She could’ve really used some thoughts right now because he was hinting to a kiss and in front of her was no other than Adrien Agreste.

Before she could do anything against it she felt her mind throwing her worries overboard, leaning in as well, copying his actions. Her eyes fluttered but before she could close them, the door flew wide open and an innocent looking Nino barged in, followed by Alya who clenched her teeth, practically smoking with annoyance.

Adrien and Marinette immediately parted and the bluenette leaned back on her pillow, a bright red blush in her face while the blonde sat back on the chair and crossed his legs, suddenly very interested in the fabric of his jeans.

“I-Interesting, Marinette.”, he tried to save them, but Alya had already noticed and stopped dead in tracks, “Uh, and you made it all by yourself?”

Marinette caught the glance of her best friend and knew they were busted.

“Uh, y-yeah, kn-knitting is not th-that h-hard, y’know?”

She kneaded her blanket then brushed it smooth again. She saw Adrien nodding, a faint blush in his cheeks visible too, but of course the brunette had already pieced together what had happened – or more like, what had not happened – between the two of them.

“Well then, how about you two meet and Adrien learns knitting from Marinette, hmmmmm?!”

Suddenly Alya had a very smudge grin on her face that she just wanted to wipe off of her, with a cookie to the face or something. Too bad her parents hadn’t brought anything from the bakery.

“Uh, no, it’s very complicated-”, she began but at the same time, Adrien tried to save them too.

“I-... Uh, I don’t want to, thanks, I’ve got enough with-”

They both shut up at the same time, both faces growing an even deeper shade of red and they did their best not to meet Alya’s eagle eyes.

“I’m sure-…”, her best friend grinned, but the door opened and cut off her sentence. Marinette’s parents came in and Adrien stood up, not wanting to be in the way of her mother who ran up to the bed, pulling her daughter into a very tearful embrace. Her father joined the hug and Alya cleared her throat.

“We’ll check up on you tomorrow, Mari! Text me!”

And with that, her best friend had linked arms with both boys and was out the door. Marinette was very grateful of Alya’s quick thinking and her very unsubtle hint to leave them to family stuff. She had a lot of talking to do with her parents after all.

 

* * *

 

Nino and Alya sat together in the library. They had been assigned to do a project about the roman empire together, their topic were the gladiator fights.

But they couldn’t care less.

They still had weeks to finish their presentation and so they discussed something different. A theory that had come to Alya’s mind while they had waited for Marinette to wake up.

“But why, Nino, why was she always fixated on telling everyone Ladybug _wasn’t_ dead?”

“Maybe denial? I mean, she was accused of murdering her, so-…”, the boy pointed out, without even looking up from his paper on which he tried doodling dogs.

“No, I don’t think so. C’mon Nino, there has to be more to this than just denial.”

Nino sighed, placing his pencil on the table. He knocked on her head as she spaced out in her thoughts again.

“Hey there, earth to Alya?”

She scowled at him, nibbling on her pencil even more.

“Stop it, Nino. I’m sure if there was nothing to it, she would’ve just said she was not the one who killed Ladybug. That it had been Miss Fortune. But the things she said shortly before she ran off to try and-… y’know… They made me suspicious. She said that Ladybug would be dead _now_ , after her humiliation by Chloé. Why only _now_?”

The boy rolled his eyes, starting to poke her with his pencil to annoy her. But she was too wrapped up in her thoughts and the journalist-mode, so she didn’t even notice him.

“No, something is not right here. What if Ladybug’s really still alive? What if Marinette’s not lying? But why wouldn’t Ladybug just show up then? And by the way, why would she be lying about Ladybug still being alive so persistently when Ladybug really is dead? It just-… It doesn’t make any sense at all! Ugh!”

Nino laughed at that and patted her back as she let her head fall onto the table with a loud crashing sound.

“Maybe you’re overthinking this. Marinette is a human after all, so maybe she has no memories of Miss Fortune killing Ladybug – as we don’t have any memory of our akumatized time too – and mistook a bird for Ladybug and now she thinks Ladybug is still alive?”

Alya shook her head, rolling it around on the surface of the table.

“No, Marinette’s not like that. Especially with such a big thing. She would’ve double-checked. After all she’s accused of _murdering_ her.”

“Or maybe that’s just you. No, really though, that girl’s confused. She had been left alone from everyone, had been pushed away countless times. She’s desperate. Desperate people grab every straw.”

“It didn’t sound like it. Marinette’s convinced Ladybug’s still alive, but she can’t tell us why she knows that. If she’d mistaken a bird for Ladybug, then she would’ve told us right away where she’d seen her and when. Instead, she’s hiding her reasons, she can’t tell us why she thinks Ladybug’s still alive. Why can’t she tell us?!”

“Seriously Alya, you’re interpreting too much into her actions.”

“Am not. Just consider, what if Ladybug’s still alive. Is she hiding? Is she avoiding the public? Why would she? Does A-… Uhm, Chat Noir know about her being alive, does Chat Noir know where she is, maybe? And why does Marinette know when she doesn’t have any memory of being akumatized? Or maybe she does remember but _why can she_ then? Nobody else can… And what if Ladybug is still alive? But why is A-… Chat Noir so lost, then? Or maybe he doesn’t know and thinks she is dead? But he’s her partner, why wouldn’t he know then? I gotta ta-… Uhm-… Maybe I’ll somehow be able to meet him.”, she gulped nervously and chided herself. She’s got to be more careful until Adrien would tell Nino he’s Chat Noir. Still, though, she had to talk to Adrien.

“Why would Marinette know? And why does she-…”

He just let her ramble on, listening to her halfheartedly while she tied a knot with her thoughts. He was still convinced Mari was confused, so he relaxed and let Alya realize that too.

“Why, why?!”, the girl brought her hands to her face, groaning, waiting for a bit before, “Hey wait-… It’s all about Ladybug’s and Chat Noir’s Miraculous, isn’t it?”

Nino nodded slightly, caught up in his playlist he just recently made, gaze fixed on the phone.

“And without their Miraculous they’re just civilians, right?”

_Duh_ , she thought. She just had to take Nino with her on her train of thoughts.

Again, he nodded.

“What if, and seriously now, what if Ladybug’s Miraculous had been taken by Miss Fortune and brought to Hawkmoth so Ladybug is left without her Miraculous, but nobody knows and she can’t make an appearance because she can’t transform anymore?”

The boy looked up from his phone and locked their eyes. He went through all of the possibilities and actually, it seemed quite logical. Slowly, he nodded a third time, shoving his phone into the pocket of his jeans.

“So that’s why everyone thinks Ladybug is dead. Because she hadn’t told her secret identity to anyone and now nobody can recognize her in her civilian form. And that also explains why Marinette knows, because she was Miss Fortune and she watched as Ladybug’s Miraculous had been taken from her. Because she _somehow_ remembers. She _has to_ remember, otherwise _nothing_ would make se-”

The brunette suddenly froze. Nino tilted his head and his eyebrows moved up.

“Alya? Hey girl, you okay? You still in there somewhere?”

He waved before her eyes as her jaw fell down, her mouth forming an ‘o’. He snickered, then took his pencil and mimed a microphone with it.

“Houston, I think we might have lost her. Houston, I repeat, we might’ve lost Alya Césaire. Houston, we have a problem.”

She remained silent for a few moments, then she suddenly grabbed Nino’s collar and pulled him down for her to whisper in his ear. The warm breeze of her breaths swept against his hair.

“Nino, _how_ does she remember any of this? We don’t remember _anything_.”

He shook his head, glad to finally have a sign of life again.

“What if Marinette didn’t even have to search for Ladybug to get her earrings?! She didn’t even have the time considering how quickly Marinette was out the school and Miss Fortune was there. It barely had been half an hour between her leaving the school and returning to the school in her akumatized form, and Ladybug had certainly stoop up against much stronger Akumas than Miss Fortune had been. Searching for her and taking her Miraculous, killing her in the process _and_ bringing the earrings to Hawkmoth… It should’ve taken her much longer!”

His eyes went wide as he understood what she aimed at.

“You’re saying…?”

“What if she remembers everything, because she had an advantage over us all? Or because Hawkmoth wanted her to see how much she had failed and not because he wanted to have someone to witness Ladybug’s death?! And Marinette told everyone that Ladybug was still alive, so what would be Hawkmoth’s point in letting her keep her memories if Ladybug was not killed?! What if… She had given him _her_ earrings?! _What if Marinette is Ladybug?!_ ”

Nino gasped, bending down even more.

“Do you think that could even be possible? Marinette, the shy girl we know? _The_ Marinette I know since she was born?”

She secretly huffed at that. Well, the blonde boy sitting next to Nino for years now had kept the same secret. It all made sense.

“I wouldn’t completely leave it out of consideration. Just think about it. Marinette was akumatized and could take off her Miraculous in the last second. Hawkmoth sees this and demands Miss Fortune to bring him the Miraculous. Of course she obliges, _Miss Fortune_ obliges. But at the same time, because she is Ladybug _and_ because he wants to make her see the fight, Marinette watches. Chat beats her and she tries to convince him that Ladybug isn’t dead, but he doesn’t want to hear anything of her murderer, so he leaves. She tries with everyone else, but nobody wants to have anything to do with her. She realizes, she can’t convince the people without telling them about her secret identity, but she also knows, that everyone will most likely think it’s a lie if she claimed she was Ladybug, it would be seen as a desperate act to set everything right again. Additionally, Ladybug’s murderer Ladybug herself? Wouldn’t make any sense – if Ladybug’s considered dead because she doesn’t show up anymore. But what if she isn’t? What if Ladybug herself had been akumatized and had no chance of telling or showing anyone that she was still alive?! Our problem isn’t, that we didn’t know Ladybug’s identity to find her corpse, it was that we took Ladybug for a full person, without a civilian life! We didn’t even consider her civil life, we couldn’t even have known where to start!”

The boy’s eyes widened even more and he grabbed Alya’s shoulder.

“Do you know what that means?!”

“Ladybug’s still alive?”

“Ladybug’s been around us the whole time, making the most horrible decisions of her life because she fell into depression! Because _we_ fell for a simple _lie_!”

Alya paled and clenched her teeth. Ladybug being drunk, Ladybug slicing her arms open, because nobody would believe her when she told them she actually was Marinette Dupain-Cheng.

She had been so blind.

“… I’ll talk to her about that today.”

And she’d _definitely_ have to talk to Adrien.


	33. Chapter 33

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The picture is complete.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank all of you guys for leaving comments! It's such an honor for me to receive them and I always read every single one! (And I try to answer those with a question, even if it's sometimes verrry late... Sorry.)  
> Anyways, here I am with a new chapter and finally, everything is clear (at least for Alya and Nino cough).  
> Also, I kinda had an idea and I'd like to hear what you think about that. Would you guys be interested in a Discord server to, I dunno, discuss Breeze story things, maybe just talk about nonsense and overall just hype Miraculous? If so, please let me know ;)  
> Anyway, here's the chapter, please enjoy~

The next morning, Marinette woke up later than usual. Her parents had left late and she had so much to think about, so until she was able to sleep, it had been after midnight already.

A few doctors came to check on her, as well as Dr. Mendes. She was glad to see and talk to him, as much as he enjoyed her opening up. After he had left, a nurse came in and gently took her arm, the one she had tried to kill herself on.

“Dear, I’ve got to look at it to make sure it heals. Is that okay with you?”

Marinette hesitated. Was she able to see it yet?

“Well, yeah, of course-… But do I have to look at it, too?”

“Only if you want to, dear. I can give you a blindfold or you can just look away.”

“O-Okay-… No blindfold, thank you. It’s fine.”

The nurse smiled and softly began to unwrap the bandage.

“When you feel uncomfortable just tell me, alright?”

Marinette didn’t trust her own voice anymore so she just nodded. Luckily, the warm hands of the nurse calmed her a bit, enough to make her close her eyes and relax.

Soon, the last bit of bandage was gone. Cold air sent a breeze brushing over her sensitive skin and she squinted her eyes even more. But she was also curious. Could she dare to look, just a glance?

“It looks much better than yesterday. The swelling is mostly gone and the skin seems to have settled after this endeavor.”

_This sounded… Good?_

She opened her eyes, slowly, only to look at the window next to her bed. Hesitating, she turned her head. Instead of glancing down just now she looked at the nurse. Her red dyed hair shone in the sun and Marinette relaxed.

“Do you want to take a look?”, the woman asked.

She bit her lip and slowly nodded.

Her arm looked horrible. Of course, there were all the cuts on her wrist she had done to herself, she already knew the sight of them. They were next to each other and relatively straight, due to the fact that they were so little in comparison to the big, long, jagged, red line following her lower arm up to her wrist. She slightly wiggled with her fingers, probably to verify it was indeed her arm she was looking at.

The cut was deep and not so straight like the others. It looked like a child had tried to draw a line with a lineal and had slipped a few times. At the end, on her wrist, it looked like the lineal had ended but the child had continued to draw, slipping down to the side of her hand.

It must’ve been her, trembling of anger thanks to Chloé, and shaking of pain. Of fear for what would happen after the cut.

_Death._

She hadn’t really thought about what death truly meant. Of course she knew it meant end of life, but she only knew life. She had nothing to compare death to.

But now she knew that she had other life’s, her parents, Alya, Nino, even Adrien, to support her. She could learn to value life again and if she got a chance to talk to Chat, she may be even able to enjoy it again.

Even if that meant she would carry these scars around with her, a constant reminder of how near she’d actually been to death once. They were everything other than pretty, but Marinette knew they belonged to her arm now. She needed those, to remind her of never doing that again.

And she was grateful she had a reminder. Of course she deeply regretted cutting herself, that was out of the question. But she had them now, creating a very welcome memorial of this hard time on her body, constantly telling her how lucky she had been.

The bandages were left off, so Marinette tucked her arms under her blanket as her friends came in the lunch break.

It felt good to think of them as friends again. After months of being completely alone, she was grateful for them visiting her. And excited! So she kinda… Maybe… Threw her arms around Alya regardless of her cuts and scars.

She heard Nino’s gasp and Adrien’s choked sound of shock. She heard a door slammed shut louder than usual. Alya tensed in her arms, surprised by the reactions of the boys. Marinette quickly let go of her and hid her arms under her blanket before Alya could see them. Her best friend’s eyebrows knitted together and studied the faces of the boys. They were both pale and showed sudden interest in the ground, avoiding to look at the girls.

The brunette turned to Marinette again and glanced down to her hidden arms.

“What’re you hiding?”

“Nothing.”

Alya shook her head, her face softening as she sat down on the side of her bed.

“… You’re not wearing any bandages, are you?”

Marinette bit her lip and avoided Alya’s eyes. Slowly, she nodded and Alya shot a gaze to the boys, asking them to wait outside for a second. Adrien understood and practically dragged Nino out, leaving the girls alone in the room.

An uneasy silence hung between them and she still kneaded her bedsheets until her best friend’s voice cut through the quiet.

“I wanna see them. Can I? Can you show me?”

The bluenette saw the pleading look in Alya’s face as she lifted her gaze.

“… Okay.”, she murmured.

Gently, her best friend took her elbows and pulled them out of the bedsheets, hesitating as the first cuts moved in sight.

Marinette suddenly shook her head, shoving her arms under the blanket once again and looked away.

“I don’t wanna make you feel uncomfortable, Alya. I-… I’m just not sure if you’re ready to see them, if I’m ready to show you.”

Her best friend moved to sit right next to her, nudging her shoulder a bit to make her move to the side. Marinette shifted and Alya settled down next to her, kicking off her shoes to imitate her position.

“If you don’t want to, it’s okay. Just-… I wanna see them. I asked you to so I’m ready if you’re ready. If you wanna show me.”

Softly, she laid an arm around her back and lightly touched her elbow while her other hand took the arm closer to Alya. Her breathes created a breeze that stroke over Marinette’s skin on the neck. The touch made her tense up but she relaxed as soon as she felt her lean her head against hers. She pulled out her arms and laid them on top of the blanket, on both their legs. Alya gasped but she knew it was a normal reaction so she didn’t worry. The brunette turned her arms and inspected them, especially the sewed up cut that had almost been her death.

“It’s warm…”, her best friend murmured, “Not cold. That’s good. Means you’re alive.”

Marinette felt her placing a quick hesitant peck to her cheek, soft lips touching her skin lightly, reassuringly. She leaned her head against Alya’s once again and sighed.

“I’m glad to have you back… I missed you.”

“I missed you too, girl.”, Alya nuzzled her cheek against the bluenette’s, making her laugh.

“Alya, I love you.”, she murmured, closing her eyes.

“Love you too.”, the girl felt her saying it more than she heard it, a soft hum against her body because they were sitting so close.

They remained that snuggled up and Alya still studied her arms, caressing each and every cut on her skin with a light brush or a soft touch, murmuring how sorry she was in a constant mantra.

“When did you do all of these?”, she suddenly asked, softly and quietly, mindful of the comfortable silence.

“Over the time.”, Marinette mumbled, “I began shortly after I started drinking.”

“When was that?”, her best friend’s gaze didn’t move away. She could practically feel the hooks digging into the skin on her arms, forced to stay away from her face.

“It was about… One and a half months after that… Day.”, Alya suddenly stiffened even more, making Marinette nudge her head in curiousness, “What’s up?”

Her best friend shifted, then finally looked into her eyes.

“About that day… I’ve had my thoughts about this. What if Ladybug really is not dead, like you’re saying?”

“What’re you aiming at?”, she suspiciously asked.

“What if Ladybug’s Miraculous had been taken and because of that, she can’t transform anymore, stuck in her civilian form, unable to tell anyone?”

Alya had become quieter with each word, studying every inch of her best friend’s face. The bluenette flinched and she got a look at Marinette’s ears.

No earrings. Bingo.

“You haven’t worn your earrings in a while, Mari.”

Alya’s breath brushed in a breeze over her cheek and her gaze shot up as she locked her eyes with her best friend’s, shock laying in them.

“You-… You know?!”, she hissed.

Alya briefly lowered her gaze in an apology before looking up again.

“I figured it out, just needed confirmation of you. So you’re really Ladybug?”

She nodded, leaning her head back.

“I thought I could still keep it a secret. Still needed to keep it a secret. Who knows, besides you?”

“Nino does. Nobody else.”

“Please-… Please keep it… I-… I couldn’t deal with-… Not after the past months, that-… That people might start c-calling me a liar, I couldn’t-…”, Marinette gulped and Alya grabbed her hand, squeezing it a bit to assure her it was fine.

“Nino won’t tell anyone, as I won’t, too. Your secret is safe and who knows-… Maybe the Ladyblog could lead the readers away from your trace?”

“You would do that for me?”, she grinned, intertwining their fingers and cocking up an eyebrow.

“Girl, of course. There is a reason you didn’t want to tell me.”

“Because I wanted to keep you safe. And myself. And everyone.”

Alya nodded and placed her lips on her forehead, resting them there for a moment longer than needed.

“I’m just glad you’re safe now…”

“Me too.”, Marinette smiled, closing her eyes.

She let Alya adjust herself a bit more behind her and laid down on her best friend’s chest. It was comfy, apparently for Alya too, so they remained that way. Alya asked if the bluenette wanted to put her arms under the blanket again but she didn’t care. She said it was fine to let them out in the open because at some point, she wouldn’t be able to hide them anyway.

Marinette had already dozen off when the door opened a little and Adrien peeked around. Alya waved them in and the door opened a bit more before it was quietly closed again. The two boys came sneaking in and sat down on the two chairs next to the bed. They both felt uneasy because of her arms in Alya’s hands but she calmed them down and tightened her grip around her best friend.

“It’s okay – Nino stop staring – it just looks bad. But Marinette’s fine with it.”

“Is she-…”

“She’s fine. Just sleeping.”

Both boys smiled and while Nino’s gaze was fixed on her, Adrien looked down at Marinette on her chest.

Alya noticed that and she shifted, so that Marinette’s head fell into his direction, giving him a better look at her sleeping face. She sighed in her sleep, turned a bit in Adrien’s direction, brought her hands up to her chest and opened her mouth just a tiny, little bit.

When she brushed over the bluenette’s hair she started to smile so adorably so that he smiled too.

The girl felt him melting already, but she wanted to make him a puddle of goo, just to confirm he was feeling more towards his classmate than he would admit. T was so obvious, he needed to stop denying it. So, the brunette moved a bit more, making her head fall again and now she faced him completely.

Adrien smiled a bit more and tilted his head.

She wanted to hear it, wanted to hear the words escaping his throat so badly. And after a few moments Nino was her knight in shining armor. He nudged the blonde with his elbow after winking to her, nodding towards the bluenette on Alya’s chest.

“Kinda cute, huh?”

“She looks absolutely adorable.”, Adrien sighed, without thinking before speaking, completely forgetting his friends were right beside him. As he came back from Marinette-world and glanced around only to find the two confusedly blinking at him, his face grew red and he began stuttering.

“Uh, what I meant was-… I actually-… I was trying to say-… You see, uhm-…”

Nino started snickering and soon, Alya joined him, trying not to create too much movement to not startle her best friend. Marinette responded to the sudden shaking with a groan and hid her face in Alya’s blouse, trying to make it stop. She suppressed her laughter and calmed herself again, only to start all over again because she saw Adrien losing himself in the look of the sleeping Marinette a second time.

“You’ve fallen for her head over heels, hm?”, Nino teased him, only to laugh harder at the sight of his face creating an even deeper shade of red.

“Nuuu-uuhhhh-…”, he mumbled, avoiding to look at anyone of them.

As the bluenette sighed, Alya ran a soothing hand over her hair, making her relax. Finally, she managed to stop the laughter and breathed calmer.

“You can admit it, y’know.”

“I just-… I said she was adorable, nothing more.”

Nino nodded and still laughed as Adrien began pouting.

“Dude, it’s so obvious. Seriously.”

Adrien huffed, crossing his arms and looked to the floor.

“… It’s not.”, he mumbled, avoiding their eye contact. Alya immediately stilled and furrowed her eyebrows. Was he-… Serious?

“Adrien?”, she asked, while Nino was still chuckling, oblivious to his best friend’s mortification, “Are you-… Do you like her? Please be honest.”

Nino’s laughter quickly subsided as the blonde stayed silent. After a few moments Adrien shrugged hesitantly, still avoiding looking up.

“W-Well… I honestly don’t know, I mean-… I guess I’ve always liked her a bit. But-… I dunno, Ladybug’s always been…”

She had to tell him. She had to tell him Ladybug was right here. She had to. She couldn’t keep it from him, that wouldn’t be fair. He was so distraught about the thought of liking Marinette while-… While he still thought Ladybug was dead. That Marinette’s Akuma had killed her. She knew about his love for her and she had witnessed it throughout the year. Chat Noir loved Ladybug. Marinette loved Adrien. She had already spent the night yelling into her pillow because of how dense her friends had been over the years, because of how inattentive she had been.

She had figured it out, she had figured everything out and how frustrating, how frustrating it was that she wasn’t able to talk to Nino about it. Adrien hadn’t told him yet that he was Chat Noir. Probably because he wanted to keep his best friend safe.

But it wasn’t her place. Such a big thing like a secret identity wasn’t something she could just go around spilling. Even if she wanted to prove the whole world that Marinette was innocent, that Ladybug was still alive. Even if she could see it in Nino’s face that he ached to do the same, they weren’t allowed to. Adrien had to tell Nino and Marinette had to tell Adrien. It wasn’t Alya’s right to violate Marinette’s secret even more. It technically hadn’t even been her place to discover it, especially not together with Nino.

“… Adrien, you should know that-”

“You should know something about that!”, Nino quickly interjected. He shot her a glare and she pressed her lips together.

“Marinette-… She-… She’s been crushing on you, dude. Since tenth grade. You-… You should know that before-… Y’know, before doing anything.”

Alya saw Adrien’s head snapping up and knew, it had been wrong to tell him. Him as Chat Noir. He had injured her, the girl who had been crushing on him. He had ignored her, blamed her and if the guilt of Chat Noir’s actions hadn’t already been enough, now knowing that this girl had loved him all along literally destroyed him. She saw tears welling up in his eyes and tried saying something, tried soothing him but it was too late. He jumped up, his fists clenching. She saw him briefly reaching out to the pocket where he kept his Kwami, Plagg, and meet her gaze.

“I-… I need to go…”, he forced out, dodging Nino’s hand as he tried to hold him.

“No, Adrien, wa-”

“I need to go-… N-Now!”, with that, he turned on his heel and ran to the door, ripping it open and vanishing.

Alya and Nino stayed silent for a good while, just staring while the hospital door slowly fell closed again. Finally, the girl was the first one to speak up.

“What-… What was that?!”

Nino turned back around to her, his eyebrows furrowed.

“No, what was _that_?!”, he shot back, gesturing at her, “You were about to tell him Marinette’s Ladybug! I saw it!”

She frowned and clenched her teeth.

“Well, you just told him she had a crush on him! That wasn’t your place to tell!”

“Just as it wasn’t _your_ place to tell him her secret identity!”

Alya did her best to stay calm and not wake Marinette but she couldn’t hold back the sharp tones as she replied.

“Do you even know what that did to him?!”

She saw his face contorting in anger as he stood up, the muscles in his arms tensing.

“No, but apparently you do, huh?!”

“Oh c’mon…”, she groaned, “It’s not the way you think it is.”

He furrowed his eyebrows but thankfully kept his voice low, for Marinette.

“Oh, which way is it then? _Please_ give me directions.”, he spat out, sarcastically.

“Oh well, maybe because he’s Chat Noir and this just smashed him with _doubled force_?!”, she hadn’t even realized she had spilled it until Nino’s eyes went wide. Going over what she had just said she gulped and shook her head, somehow wishing she could take it back.

“N-Nino, I-… I’m sorry, I-”

“Adrien-…”, the boy just murmured, wide eyed. He took a step back, already turning towards the door, “… Adrien…!”

He took a few hesitant steps, then he broke into a run, after the blonde. And with that, Alya was left alone, pinned to the bed by her sleeping friend.


	34. Chapter 34

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A long overdue talk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaaaaalright!  
> Here's the new chapter, most of all! A little earlier than usual since I'll be busy for the rest of the day but I doubt you guys will mind :D  
> Anyway, I asked if you were interested in a discord server!  
> And since I got a bit feedback I put one up, here's the link ;) I'm looking forward to meeting you there, if you want!  
> \--> https://discord.gg/w5DjSjC  
> But for now:  
> Enjoy~

_Marinette loved me_ , Adrien chanted in his head as he exited the hospital.

_She loved me once._

And he hadn’t noticed. For years already he hadn’t noticed her pining after him, her looking at him and wondering, her-…

_Worse._

He had kicked her. He hadn’t just fought her, he had defeated, humiliated and knocked her down. He had set the example for people to feel the need to _kill_ her. He had been the trigger for people to hate her, to hate her so much they didn’t want her in this city anymore and this Paris was big.

He shook his head and squinted his eyes as he ran down the street, wind flying past his ears.

She had loved him, she hadn’t just seen him as a friend and he had never understood. Suddenly he understood. Suddenly he saw her blushing back then, heard her stuttering over the loud pulsing of his heartbeat and the rushing of blood in his ears. He saw her grinning at him and saw how much it had meant to her.

He _saw_ her.

And without even knowing anything he just blindly stumbled over his words. He had admitted that he was crushing on her. He had admitted in front of her while she was sleeping that he liked her, without even understanding which weight his words held. Which weight it could’ve held for her had she been awake, how hard it must’ve been for Alya to hear.

He understood why Mari must’ve opened up to him that night, back when he had found her and treated her dinner. She must’ve been reminded of her old feelings for him. Or-… Maybe she still-…

He quickly shook his head, tears welling up in his eyes.

It couldn’t, it couldn’t be true. He had beaten her up, not as Adrien but as Chat Noir. She didn’t make this connection but he did and it destroyed him. He had given the initial push for her to tumble over the edge and-… And try to-… To kill herself! And then he had the audacity to fall in love?!

Then he didn’t care about what had happened, how much he had hurt her, not only physically but also before, when he hadn’t noticed her blush because he had been blinded by Ladybug’s light. He had ignored her, before and after she was akumatized.

Adrien sobbed and shook his head, only narrowly taking a step to the side in the middle of his run, not to knock over a few civilians.

How could he have done this to her? How could he have dared to fall in love with her and-… And-… Betray her like that?! He didn’t have the right to-… To ask her for her love.

On the other side… He could also just ignore his feelings. He could just-… Let it go.

Could he?

Her big, blue eyes which have gone through too much, soft voice, her gentle attempts of calming him and her warm hug when she had succeeded haunted him. He cried out and rubbed over his face.

Slowly, his feet came to a halt and he came to stand in the middle of a sidewalk. He looked up.

“… Plagg?”, the faint question came out shaky, “Can-… Can we transform? Please?”

The tiny go of destruction carefully poked out his head to check the situation, then he hissed.

“Over there. There’s a park. I think you can hide in the bushes somewhe-”

“ADRIEN!!”, someone yelled. The blonde flinched and swirled around, feeling Plagg hiding in his jacket again. Moments later, Nino skittered around the corner and slowed down as he finally saw the blonde standing there, propping his hands up on his knees and panting.

“Nino?”

His friend looked up and then leaned back, trying to catch his breath. Adrien already itched to start running to transform but Nino just shook his head, begging him to stay.

“What-… What are you doing here?”, he tried.  
Nino lifted a hand before he could speak, then he loudly sighed and shook his head.

“Alya-… Alya told me…”

Fear surged through his body and he stilled, his heart suddenly beating up in his chest. He felt an icy wave rushing down his spine and his eyes widen.

“… T-Told you-… What?”

Nino wordlessly gestured to Adrien’s ring until he was finally calm enough to properly speak.

“Your-… Your secret, man…”

Adrien slowly nodded, already stepping back. Nino would yell at him. He’d be angry and blame him like he deserved it. He’d tell him to go to hell and that he never wanted to see him again. He’d-

Of all the things he had fathomed, hugging had not been an option.

Nino had just stepped up to him and hugged him tightly, a quiet tremble flowing through his body. The blonde was too dumbstruck to react, too shocked to say anything.

But his friend only tightened his embrace and breathed through, slowly calming Adrien down as well. It-… Didn’t seem as if Nino wanted to kill him? At least?

“… I-… I’m-… S-So sorry…”, Nino finally choked out, causing Adrien to completely lose every connection he formerly had to the world. Now he was _really_ concerned.

“Why-… Why’re you sorry…?”, he whispered, slowly, hesitantly, lifting his arms to hug his friend back, “I-… I thought you’d be mad… Because I-… Because I, well-…”

Nino shook his head, to Adrien’s complete surprise now forcing out a laugh that could’ve just as well been a sob.

“I-… I thought I was-… But-…”, his voice broke under more sobs and Adrien finally held him tighter, completely wrapping his arms around the trembling boy.

“What? Why-… I-I mean, you gotta blame me for-… For-…”

His friend breathed through and slowly calmed down again, at least enough to talk.

“I mean-… Yeah… You made mistakes, but-… I only saw the one side of the story, Adrien’s… I was so angry you wouldn’t take part in trying to save Marinette, or, well-…”, he shrugged, “That you’d do it on your own. I-… I was so angry that you-… That you wouldn’t _once_ ask us to be a part of this as well, since I was the person thinking Marinette was innocent the whole time. And-… You-… Getting through to her like that, without even really trying…”

They finally parted and Nino ran a hand through his short hair.

“Well, I just-… I felt betrayed… I mean, it makes so much more sense now that _you_ were able to break through to her, nobody else could’ve, but-”

“Wow, wow.”, Adrien interrupted, lifting his eyebrows, “Why specifically me? Because I’m-…”, he lowered his voice a bit after looking around, “… Y’know?”

Nino gulped for some reason before shaking his head, awkwardly chuckling.

“Uh, just, yeah, because you’re Chat Noir. Yeah.”

Adrien furrowed his eyebrows and was about to ask further but Nino quickly continued, shaking his head.

“Well, anyway… I was so angry you-… You didn’t even seem to care but-… All that time I didn’t see how-… How busy you were. How-… How much this must’ve taken a toll on you.”

The blonde pressed his lips together and eyed his best friend, tilting his head.

“Uh-… But-… Aren’t you mad at me for keeping it a secret since tenth grade? For-… For lying to you and-… And for, well-… B-Beating up Marinette? For-… Doing all this shit?”

He had feared the worst things, to be honest. He had feared the boy would suddenly change his mind and now do all the awful things he had imagined but he merely shrugged, shaking his head.

“No… After all, I know why secret identities have to be a secret. I guess I-… I didn’t expect it… After all, Ch-… You sat beside me all this time.”, he rolled his eyes, “Can we go a little more private? I believe we got a lot to clarify.”

Adrien nodded and turned around again, aiming for the park. He nodded Nino to come along and a mere second later, his best friend was walking beside him.

“So-… You-… You’re not mad…?”

Nino sighed and shook his head, placing a hand on Adrien’s shoulder.

“Oh no, I _am_ mad. I’m-… Not disappointed you didn’t trust me enough, that’s bullshit. I know it’s not about trust and I know that if this all had been flowers and fun you would’ve told me. Heck, I know I wouldn’t have told anybody if I had a superhero identity.”, he breathed through as they entered the park and removed his hand again, “No, I’m just-…. I guess I’m glad I understand you now. And-… I guess I’ve been unfair. I didn’t know what you had to go through and I still asked for more. I’m sorry, bro, I didn’t mean to-”

Now he was the one to be surprised by a hug. Adrien tightly wrapped his arms around him and buried his face on his shoulder, lightly sniffling.

“Dude-… Why-… Why are you so-… Like this?! I-… I feared the worst when I realized you knew. I-… You were already so-… So kind with Marinette and-… And now you’re-… Wh-Why are you so understanding?!”

Nino merely chuckled, lightly patting his back.

“I guess-… I guess I just like to protect my friends… That’s all.”

He barely murmured a ‘thank you’ before he was already interrupted. Plagg flew out of his jacket, gagging and spluttering. Nino jumped back with wide eyes but the first Adrien did was to check for people around them. Much to their luck, nobody was in the park since it was still a relatively clouded day.

“Good grief, you two are insufferable. Just marry already.”, the Kwami cackled before Adrien snatched him out of the air.

“Plagg!”, he hissed, “You can’t just fly out in the open like this! Someone could’ve seen you!”

His Kwami still snickered, shaking his head.

“Kid, I’ve got experiences and senses you dull humans don’t have. I knew it was safe.”

“Still, Plagg! You gave me a heart attack!”

The Kwami cackled and pointed to the other boy.

“I think I gave him one.”

Adrien gasped as he saw how pale Nino had become, his mouth opened in a silent scream, his shaky finger pointing at the tiny, floating, black cat.

To say he was surprised was an understatement. Hell, even saying he was shocked was probably not even enough.

He was just lucky he didn’t faint yet.

So he sighed, let go of the Kwami and send him a glare.

“That was not nice, Plagg. You really gotta stop jumping on people.”

“But that’s the funniest!”

He rolled his eyes and stepped to Nino.

“Oh boy, uhm-… Nino? So, uh, you probably know I have to transform to be Chat Noir… Well… Uh, this is Plagg? He’s the Kwami of my Miraculous, the, uhm, the ring.”, he held up his hand and showed him his silver ring, “Plagg goes into the Miraculous and I can transform, then. Are-… Are you okay?”

“There’s a cat.”, his friend replied, still staring at Plagg.

“Yes, uh, Plagg’s a cat. Or, well-… A Kwami. A-… Cat Kwami?”, he questioningly turned to Plagg but Nino spoke up again.

“That’s a cat.”, he stated, “A talking, floating, black cat. That’s a _floating cat_. A _cat_!”

Adrien bit his lip, trying to hold back a chuckle at the antics of his shocked best friend.

“Uhm, yes, that is a talking, floating, black cat. Still, you okay?”

Nino furrowed his eyebrows and his gaze flitted between the Kwami and his holder. His expression pleaded for Adrien to understand how _surreal_ and _unnormal_ and completely _impossible_ that was.

He huffed and pointed at Plagg again.

“That’s a talking, floating, speaking, flying, hovering, _magical, black cat_! _Dude_!”, he shrieked.

“He’s a little slow.”, Plagg commented but Adrien swatted at him, “What?”

“He’s shocked, that’s all. Uh-… Nino? Do you need to sit down?”

His best friend just flopped to the floor where he stood, his gaze still locked on the Kwami, his legs folded beneath him.

“Oh boy…”, Adrien said, kneeling down in front of him, “Bro?”

“… Talk.”, was the only thing the boy managed before his eyes met Adrien’s, a firm seriousness clearly evident in his lines.

 

* * *

 

When Alya had finally been able to reach Nino on his phone she had asked them to tell Miss Mendeleiev she would come later. She didn’t mind getting detention if it meant helping her best friend to feel better again. And if Marinette needed to sleep on top of her to achieve that goal, so be it.

Luckily, he sounded okay. Well, relatively.

Apparently, he and Adrien were still in the park, talking about-… Well, probably everything. But they promised they’d be there for math, to tell Miss Mendeleiev she wouldn’t make it.

Right as Alya became sleepy too, Mari’s parents stepped in. They immediately relaxed at the sight of the two girls snuggling together and her mother smiled brightly at that.

Later, the younger bluenette finally woke and it was time for Alya to get to class. She had missed math completely, luckily for her. So Miss Mendeleiev wouldn’t be able to give her detention. Well, maybe in the next lesson. But probably not. After all the teacher did have a heart after all and knew what had happened to Marinette.

After school she quickly went back to the hospital, only to see Marinette talking with her father, beaming at her brightly because she had come to visit. They talked about what Marinette had missed in school and how their classmates had reacted to her suicide attempt and not for the first time in three days, Alya asked herself how she had been able to ignore her best friend for so long.


	35. Chapter 35

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things are starting to fall back into their place.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys, thank you so much for your comments. I really, really enjoyed reading all of them!  
> And the Breeze server is a lot of fun!  
> If you wanna join, here's another link!  
> -> https://discord.gg/w5DjSjC  
> Also, this chapter is kinda a filler. Again, if you want something written out that I skipped because of the plot, you can easily send me a prompt over tumblr or in the comments under my story "Miraculous Prompts"! I'd be happy to write something for you! (And I'll put the links in the notes below)  
> Enjoy~

The initial idea had come from Marinette herself but it had still taken a lot of reassuring and caring for her to allow her back to school.

She didn’t want to miss too much and she really wanted to see her classmates again since Nino, Alya and Adrien had told her how they felt.

Horrible, to say the least. Just horrible. Most had been devastated when they had been told that Marinette had tried to kill herself. Even Alix had been in shock and Alix _never_ cried. But the guilt had hit her hard. Kim, on the other hand, had let it all out. Well, considering he knew Marinette since kindergarten he had all right to do that.

The bluenette had made good progress with all her friends and her parents. Nobody had expected it but Marinette seemed like a whole new person. She seemed to have woken up due to the shock of having tried something like this and it definitely helped she stayed at the hospital. Like this, nobody was allowed into her room who wanted to harm her. Being surrounded by people who worried for her and supported her really helped her regaining a bit of trust.

Like this she had made up with her mother and Nino, which were the easiest. When she had problems with Alya they just started hugging which eventually morphed into snuggling and finally they both falling asleep. It was their way of coping, Alya’s way of apologizing to Marinette for what she had done and Marinette’s way of showing Alya her forgiveness as well as slowly starting to trust her again. They didn’t even need many words to find themselves hugging again.

Adrien had it a bit harder. Even if he should’ve had it the easiest. Marinette had started being skeptical towards him again, after feeling his behavior towards her having changed. She was jumpy at people changing their minds and behavior, they all had to fight with that a little, but Adrien couldn’t help it. He couldn’t help but be torn between his feelings, the feelings he knew she had at some point (or-… Still has?), wanting to unconditionally help her get better, ignoring his feelings and the things he knew and being tortured by his guilt as both Adrien and Chat Noir. He couldn’t help but see the beautiful girl he had fallen in love with as well as the broken girl he had beaten down so brutally. She probably noticed that – and had shut herself off a little more.

Sure, she talked with him, she felt comfortable with touching him – for brief hugs or when their hands brushed together. She could chat with him and even laugh with him, all of them again. Yet she didn’t open up to him. When they were alone – which they hardly were – she was-… Distant. Hesitant. Skeptical.

He couldn’t blame her. She still wanted to keep herself safe and not exactly knowing what he was up to, because he was acting so weirdly for her, set her off. It made her build up walls again, even if he tried to be as honest as possible. But he couldn’t tell her he had feelings for her. It’d be a punch in the guts for her and _hell_ , he had punched her enough. She eventually started trusting him regardless, because he made it very clear that he didn’t want to hurt her, but the uncertainty still lingered.

Two weeks after her attempt she was released from the hospital. Her lower arm healed, she was stable enough to be home with her parents and friends and she had scheduled two sittings a week with Dr. Mendes. She would be fine. Still, she wanted to go back to school, even if she needed the support from the people around her. She wanted to show up again. Because that’s the first step. Just show up. She had done that for months. And she wouldn’t lock herself in, fearing to leave the house. She had to – wanted to – stay strong.

There had been two moments when she had briefly faltered, when she had entered her home above the bakery with some hints to the explosion a few weeks back still evident. Luckily, her parents had been there to assure her it was fine. They still hadn’t found out who the anonymous donator had been but they had expressed their gratefulness to the, publicly.

The second moment had been when she had found multiple knifes and some alcohol bottles in her room that she had left there. She had contemplated for good half an hour if she should turn these over to her parents.

Oh, she didn’t have the intention to use them again. No.

Finally, she carried them downstairs with shaky knees. Her mother rushed to her side, carefully taking the bottles and knifes and putting them aside. Marinette feared for a tiny moment that she would get mad but all Sabine did was hugging her daughter tightly. Whispering to her how strong she had been just now. How courageous.

How much she loved her. When Marinette had begun wailing into her mother’s shoulder her father had rushed upstairs to guide his two girls to the couch. They hadn’t moved from there for the rest of the day.

And then, another three days later after being released, she was back in school, Alya, Nino and Adrien close by her side, sending glares to anyone merely looking at Marinette with the slightest hint of disgust, anger or hate.

Though, school turned out to be… Quite something else.

Still, everyone thought she had killed Ladybug. She couldn’t blame them, they didn’t know better. But instead of picking on her again, they all looked kinda embarrassed. Even without her escort. Mylène came to her as the first, sheepishly looking to the ground.

She apologized, Ivan following right behind her. She thought it was her fault Marinette had cut herself. The bluenette just put a hand on her shoulder, assuring her everything was fine and she was not to blame.

Almost the whole class came to say they were sorry it had come that way and all of them told her they were glad she was back in class. Even Miss Bustier approached her, giving her a firm hug (after the permission of Marinette and her three friends), telling her she was glad Marinette had come back again.

What surprised her the most was a little smile Miss Mendeleiev gave her when she greeted her in math.

All in all, the day had been good. For the first time in months, she felt integrated again. Of course, Chloé refused to talk to her and Sabrina stuck with her, but Marinette didn’t mind. She didn’t want to have anything to do with Chloé, especially when she had Alya, Nino and Adrien backing her up.

And although Chloé had made a mean comment about her still coming back for more, Alya had immediately grabbed her hand and had led her away, with Nino and Adrien following close behind. She had talked to them and when she had started crying out of gratefulness, her best friend had hugged her, in front of everyone, in the middle of the schoolyard. Nino and Adrien had been quick to join and only the school bell had been able to break up the group hug. Their scents left a breeze lingering in her consciousness and she once again understood she had her friends back.

To say Marinette was happy was an understatement.

She was practically glowing with new found self-esteem she found in her friends but also in the fact, that two people around her knew the truth about Ladybug. Even if she didn’t know that these very same people knew way more than she could ever imagine.

 

* * *

 

The next morning, Marinette woke up pretty early.

Quickly, she got dressed and packed her normal school stuff, actually eager to see her friends and classmates again. They had all been so understanding, so ignorant of the fact that they still thought she, or, well, her Akuma, had killed Ladybug.

She sighed and slumped back in her seat with a little smile. It had gone so fast from being hated to being-… Accepted? Even loved again? Not as fast as it had gone the other way around but still. Just before her suicide attempt she hadn’t thought it would still be possible without Ladybug. After a few moments she stood up, grabbed her bag and went downstairs. There her mother greeted her with a little kiss on the cheek. The older bluenette smiled, giving her a prepared sandwich. Marinette beamed at her, giving her an honest grin.

“Bye, Maman. I’ll see you after school!”

Her mother nodded and waved.

“Don’t forget to say goodbye to your father, he’s waiting in the bakery!”

She grinned and waved, then went out the door and down the stairs. Her father flashed her a little smile and sheepishly, she got to him.

“Hey, Papa.”

He pulled her close and sighed. She heard his voice drum through his body as he spoke.

“I’m glad I finally have you back. I acted like a complete jerk back then… I hope you can forgive me?”

She sniffled and hugged him back the best she could.

“Of course, Papa, I already told you. Don’t worry.”

He nodded and she waved him for a goodbye. Then, she was out the door, still smiling. Everything was finding back to its place and she was glad it was happening before she could’ve done something very bad.

Nino waited for her in front of the bakery, together with Alya. They greeted her both with big smiles on their faces.

“Hey there! So, second day of school?”, Nino beamed to which she just rolled her eyes.

“Dude, don’t act like I was _just_ put to school. We’re graduating next year.”

A shadow flickered over Nino’s face and he grumbled while Alya pulled her in a tight hug, still keeping it a little longer than necessary.

“Yeah, yeah.”

“What, are you scared?”, she cheekily asked out of Alya’s embrace, even grinning at him a little smugly.

“Noo…”, he prompted, “Not scared. Just-… Graduating. Ew.”

Alya rolled her eyes as she let go of Marinette, now turning to walk to the school. She made sure to stay close to her friend.

“Yeah, graduating. Deal with it!”

Nino pulled a face which caused both girls to giggle. Though, Marinette abruptly stopped after a few seconds. Alya’s and Nino’s gaze immediately searched for anything having caused that but when they found nothing and nobody who could’ve intimidated Marinette, their faces fell. Oh.

Marinette was still reflexively holding back her emotions.

“You know, girl, we should totally meet up after school and do some homework together. You looked a little lost yesterday in literature class. I can help you.”, Alya casually tried to play over the gloomy mood.

“Uhm, well… Yeah, that’d be nice, actually.”, Marinette mumbled, “Where?”

“Wherever you want.”, the taller girl reassured her, “If you want we can settle at the library or your living room or, uhm-… Well, no, my sisters are there this afternoon. That’ll be a little loud.”

“We could also go to my place?”, Nino offered, only to receive a glare from Alya, “What, I just-”

“Well, I asked Marinette to-”

“I’d love to.”, the bluenette in their middle quietly replied. Both immediately looked down to her, Nino grinning and Alya surprised.

“So, we’ll go to my place?”, he asked and Marinette nodded. First hesitantly but then with more courage.

“Yeah. I-… I think that’d be a good idea. Alya?”

“Of course!”, the brunette scrambled to agree, “Uhm, so-… Directly? Like, I’ll just call in on my mum and tell them I’ll be over at Nino’s, that’d be totally fine!”

She had to suppress a small smile at that.

“Well, I’d like to tell my Maman we’ll go to Nino’s. Y’know, just-”

“Y-Yeah, we know!”, Nino hurried to say, smiling down at her, “Don’t worry, we got you.”

At this, Marinette abruptly came to a halt in front of the school steps, staring at the boy. Alya and Nino immediately looked around again, it’s become quite a habit, but when they – again – didn’t find an external reason they both furrowed their eyebrows.

“Mari, are you okay?”

“Can we do something for you?”

“Did I say something wrong?”

The smaller girl just continued staring at Nino, tears now slowly welling up in her eyes. Alya was the first to react, instantly wrapping her arms around her and pushing her nose into her blue hair.

“Mari, Mari, it’s fine, it’s okay. We can go back and you can stay home, it’s not a problem. We’ll all keep you safe, we’ll protect you. It’s okay, really.”

Nino was quick to follow, shielding her from her other side and hugging both girls close.

“What’s up, Mari? What’s wrong? You can talk to us, you know that?”

She slowly sniffled and leaned against Alya’s shoulder, her arms slowly winding around the waists of her two friends. Nino shifted a bit to shield her more so she could feel safe. When the last bit of light had vanished from behind her closed eyes, due to her friends tightly hugging her, she allowed herself to let a few tears flow silently.

“Th-Thank-… Thank you g-guys-…”, she choked out, snuggling closer into the embrace to hide further. Alya and Nino just held her securely, making sure nobody would come their way or see that Marinette cried. And just then she realized how lucky she had gotten with them once more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr:  
> -> Own list: https://awesomefreckledjesus.tumblr.com/post/163135285581/my-own-prompt-list-for-ml  
> -> Reblogged: list https://awesomefreckledjesus.tumblr.com/post/166428313026/nearly-200-writing-prompts-feel-free-to-reblog  
> Ao3:  
> -> http://archiveofourown.org/works/11512650/chapters/25835628  
> FF.net:  
> -> https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12573981/1/Miraculous-prompts


	36. Chapter 36

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some things are more meaningful when they're not accompanied by words.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Got my first driving lesson in a few, gotta hurry bye!  
> Gonna edit this evening and put all necessary links in when I got time again!  
> Enjoy regardless~

Alya’s shoulders lightly slumped as she watched Marinette walking up the stairs to sit on her seat in the back again. She had hoped that the bluenette maybe wanted to sit beside her again.

Nino came up behind her, placing his hand on her shoulder as Marinette sat down, pulling out her tablet and pen.

“Hey Al.”, he smiled as she turned to him to give him a half-hearted smile, “She still needs this. C’mon, let’s sit down.”

He gently tossed his bag to the spot where Marinette had last been months ago and squeezed Alya’s shoulder.

“Give her some time.”

“What about Adrien?”, Alya asked as she hesitantly slid on the bench, her usual spot on the outer seat.

Nino sat on the table and lifted his feet over her lap to get to the seat beside her while responding.

“I don’t think he’ll make it on time today and he said it was fine with him if I sat with you from time to time. There, uhm-… There was a minor Akuma attack last night, a really weak one. He wrote me he’ll try not to be too late.”

Alya furrowed her eyebrows and watched as Nino propped himself up beside him to turn around and sit down on the bench beside her before turning to face her again.

“There-… There was an Akuma attack? Why didn’t I get a notification on the Ladyblog?”

Nino merely shrugged, pulling out his tablet and pen to place it on the table.

“Dunno but apparently it was a really small one. As the last few over the past weeks. I think Hawkmoth is getting weaker, he’s put quantity over quality lately.”

Alya looked down to grab her own tablet and sighed.

“You think so? I dunno… Feels more like he’s getting desperate to send out as many as he can to retrieve Chat’s Miraculous. I mean-… Keeping someone on edge is way more exhausting than trying to wear him out through multiple strong Akumas which’re taking place days apart.”

Nino stilled, softly fiddling with the little charm Adrien had given him for Christmas last year, a little note hanging from his pen.

“Hm…”, he prompted, his gaze flowing over the teacher’s desk and the board behind it, “I just-… I dunno, somehow it feels really foul to me. Hawkmoth’s been even more covered than before, he’s just-… Not even the Akumas are saying anything about Mari anymore since she tried, well-…”

Alya slowly nodded, shooting a quick glance to the back, where Mari had laid down her head on the desk, apparently relaxing a bit.

“I know… It does seem a bit weird. Hawkmoth should’ve absolutely jumped on that to weaken A-… Chat Noir.”

Nino leant back and took her hand, brushing over the back of her hand with his thumb. A nice shiver went down her spine and she automatically had to relax.

“Especially since he knows, well… That Mari is-…”

Alya just silently nodded, now resting her head on his shoulder to let him understand she knew what he meant.

“Yeah… Oh man, that really creeps me out that Hawkmoth knows. How Mari told me it had to be horrifying…”, she shivered not in a completely unpleasant way, unconsciously sliding closer to Nino, “… It’s so unfair… We somehow have to find a way to get the earrings back…”

Nino slightly stiffened but then she felt him nod and turn his head towards her to nuzzle his nose into her hair.

“I know, Al. I know. But we shouldn’t overchallenge Marinette, she needs time an-”

Alya abruptly sat up at Chloé entering the classroom, effectively cutting off Nino’s sentence. The blonde’s gaze went up to where Marinette sat and her mouth turned to a scowl. Meanwhile, Alya was ready to pounce.

Nino already squeezed her hand tighter, willing her to see what would happen, begging her to stay calm. At the same time his eyes were fixated on the blonde as well, closely observing if she would do anything.

Chloé just sat down on her seat next to Sabrina after making brief eye contact with Nino and Alya, put down her bag and crossed her arms, causing Nino to slowly relax. He leant back and breathed through, just as Kim and Max entered the classroom. Kim laughed about something, drawing Nino’s and Alya’s attention to him. The brief window was enough for Chloé to slip from her spot up the stairs.

“What-”, Marinette’s slightly panicked question, broken off, immediately let everyone’s head snap up. When Nino turned, Alya’s hand was already out of his and climbed over his lap to follow her. In the few moments Chloé had walked up the stairs and grabbed Marinette’s hand everyone had been distracted by something else. She had planned this.

The brunette dashed up the stairs and immediately broke the contact between Marinette and Chloé by tightly squeezing the wrist of the blonde and prying her hand away. Marinette immediately pulled back and cradled her arm with tears in her eyes.

To Nino’s horror it was the arm on which she had so horribly cut herself back on that day. He jumped up and ran up to her bench, quickly wrapping his arms around her and cradling her arm with his, holding it safely until the pain would subside. Much to his relief she leant against him, letting him comfort her. She didn’t pull away, didn’t try to run.

He rested his head on hers while she pressed her face into his shoulder and looked up to see Alya standing right in front of the desk, her narrowed eyes watching Chloé.

“Never again-…”, Alya growled, her fists working, “… You’ll _never again_ touch her. Or look at her. Or do _anything_ at all.”

Chloé huffed and crossed her arms, staring Alya down on her own accord.

“I just wanted to see.”, she replied. Nino recoiled and held on tighter to Marinette as Alya exploded.

“FUCK OFF!!”, she yelled, making even Chloé jump. The whole school seemed to pull up their shoulders as Alya stomped her foot, taking an angry step towards the blonde, “Marinette hasn’t given you the permission to and if she doesn’t want to show you, you will FUCK OFF!!”

“Wow.”, Chloé seemed to find her voice again. Even if it lightly shook at the base, “No need to throw a tantrum, Césaire.”

That was enough. Alya knew how tantrums felt. She had more than often dealt with a tantrum when her little sisters were behaving badly. She had often enough thrown a tantrum herself.

This was no tantrum.

This was pure, burning, seething hate.

“Shut the _fuck_ up, Bourgeois! Just _shut the fuck up_! You have no idea what Marinette went through because of you! You think you’re just as innocent as the Akuma victims but you’re _wrong_ , you’re so _fucking wrong_! You’re causing them and you even continue attacking them after their akumatization! What?! _What_ should Marinette do, huh?! Take a swan dive off the school?! Grab a knife again?!”, she took another step towards Chloé and lifted her hands. Everyone recoiled and Nino jumped up but before he could say anything, Alya had already pushed Chloé.

The girl had to stumble a step back and everyone stopped moving, in the fear of being asked if that had just happened. Did Alya just touch-… The Mayor’s daughter?!

“What should she do?! Go on, _tell me_ , you know the law so well since your father is the fucking mayor! What, _what_ does he say, is he commanding the police to arrest Marinette?! _Huh_?! Is he sentencing her to die?! Is he _fucking doing that_?!”

Chloé was actually dumbstruck. She didn’t say anything when Alya pushed her a second time, forcing her down a step.

“Go on, run to your daddy, tell him what I did! Tell him I protected Ladybug’s murderer, tell him I pushed you!! But you know what _I’ll_ tell him?! You’re an accessory to failed murder, _that’s_ what I’m gonna tell him! His daughter is a _fucking egoistic cunt_ who’d do anything, _anything_ to kill another girl. That his little precious _spoiled rotten_ princess of a daughter is _so very fucking ugly_ inside and no make-up will cover that.”

“Alya-”

“ _DO NOT_ ‘ALYA’ _ME_ , LAHIFFE!!”, she screamed, now completely in rage because _how dare he_ interrupt her while she’s doing the right thing. He bravely stood his ground, his thigh tightly pressed against Marinette’s side, but didn’t try opening his mouth again.

“Come on, say something! What happened, swallowing too hard on the truth?! What’s up, _Bourgeois_?! Scared?”

Chloé tried opening her mouth but Alya just continued, going over her weak try to protest.

“Or are you trying to cope with your guilt, _huh_?! I’d doubt that, you’d need a heart for this. And _this_ here-”, she clenched a fist and punched against Chloé’s ribcage, not hard enough to hurt her but significant enough to let her stumble back another two steps, “… That’s empty. _Useless_. Completely filled with a dark, slimy, disgusting thing called ugliness. _Dirt to my feet_.”

Everyone swallowed, now looking up to Nino who had wrapped his arms around Marinette again, kneeling on the bench to be fast should Alya lash out even more. But they knew they couldn’t stop her anymore. If she brought out her fire once, nobody wanted to be in her way.

“Oh no, I just insulted you! I just called you useless! How’s that FUCKING FEEL, HUH?! How does it feel, being called useless, dirt to my feet?! How does it feel, being called a disgrace?!”, she could’ve spat the next words and it wouldn’t have come out differently. Her voice had gone from screaming to hissing in an instant and she talked through her teeth. Somehow, this was worse than screaming, “Being told that you’re just pitied by your friends. That you don’t mean anything to anyone you loved.”

Something flashed in Chloé’s eyes and her face fell. She didn’t even try to hold up her posture as Alya pushed her another time, forcing her further down the stairs. She just stared at the girl in front of her, raging, burning, seething.

“What does it feel like?!”, she now raised her voice again, her eyes burning more intense than before, “Oh, _what_ , feel the hate rising in your throat?! Feel the anger warming your ears?! Feel the sadness weighing your chest down?! Then you have a _snippet_ of how Marinette felt back then, back when _you_ akumatized her!!”

Nino slowly straightened up again, loosening his embrace around his friend and slowly edging around the bench to eventually stop Alya before she would do something stupid.

“Feel the rage?! Huh?! Feel the disappointment, the _despair_?! _The fucking helplessness_ I’m putting you in, bad, _bad Alya_?! Feel like an Akuma is on its way, fluttering happily because someone succeeded again in _making someone else mad_?!”

Some gazes involuntarily went to the windows but immediately back to the fight. Alya had clenched her fists by now and forced Chloé down to the height of her desk, one step away from ground level.

“I don’t know why you keep doing this.”, Alya now concluded, some of her anger having morphed into something entirely worse – disappointment. Honest disappointment, “I really don’t know what you get from this. I just acted like you, exactly like you, and I feel _awful_. Even for protecting my best friend.”

Alya sighed and leant back, probably to release some of the tension she built up through screaming.

“Go, run to your father. I’m sure he’ll be happy to hear I verbally abused and almost beat you to death. That’s what you’re best at, aren’t you? Exaggerating.”, she rolled her shoulders, then she shrugged, “Yeah, I don’t care. Go to the mayor, I’m eighteen. I can go to prison. Tomorrow I’m heading to Château d’If, ready to rot there.”

Everyone saw it in Alya’s eyes as she went for the kill. Everyone could have felt a needle drop to the floor in the moment right before Alya opened her lips again.

“But hey, if I didn’t have a real life and were looking forward to be daughter by profession because I was useless then at least destroy as many lives that I can as I go down, huh? Can understand you there.”

That was it. Just like this, Alya had gone from rage to final kill – completely calm. She didn’t even allow any emotion on her face as she stared down at Chloé, standing one step above her.

Nobody dared to breathe as the two girls continued to stare each other down. Even Marinette sat up a little straighter, anxious what would happen now.

They waited for a bit longer, seeing Alya’s eyes narrowing, while Chloé still didn’t move. Not even a faint breathing sound somehow filled the room for something way heavier blocked the air.

Suddenly a faint movement. Chloé was the first. Her hands lowered down to hang limply by her sides and she didn’t straighten her shoulders, as always. She just broke the eye contact, also something she never did first, and turned – to sit down on her desk.

Her shoulders were hunched and she stared down at her desk, not moving a single muscle, not to her phone and not to stand up again, scowl, and run to her father.

Another few moments nothing happened. Nobody even attempted to lift their gaze off of Chloé except Alya, as Miss Bustier stepped in.

After looking around in the classroom she noted with a nod that she had recognized the mood, deciding on keeping herself busy with arranging her stuff to give the class a bit of time to settle down.

She didn’t question why Chloé acted completely unnatural. She also didn’t question it as Alya turned on her heel, grabbed Nino’s and her stuff and returned to the last row where Marinette was wordlessly comforted by the boy embracing her. And lastly, she didn’t question it when Adrien only showed up ten minutes before the lesson.

She didn’t need to.

The faces of five of her students spoke volumes for her.


	37. Chapter 37

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Unexpected things coming Alya's way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gotta hurry cuz I gotta run to the next lecture.  
> As you may have already seen, there's a new story linked to Breeze! It's written by LadyMorganaShire and it's awesome! Please go check it out!  
> -> http://archiveofourown.org/works/12726171/chapters/29022348  
> So, hope you gonna enjoy and uuuuuuuh so not sorry for the end >:)  
> Enjoy~

In the moment in which the bell signaled the day to end Alya collected her stuff and shouldered her back, running to the back to help Mari. Nino turned around to see Mari giving Alya a little smile, then she lifted her bag up as well.

She had acted a little overprotectively, much to Mari’s annoyance, actually, since Chloé’s attempt to attack her again. She hadn’t left her side, even if the blonde girl up front had remained silent all day. She hadn’t spoken a word since, not even to Sabrina.

Nino packed his bag and stood up to wait by the door for them. Adrien joined him while the girls still talked a bit, sighing.

“Did you get enough sleep, dude?”, Nino carefully asked, placing his hand on his shoulder.

“Uhm-… Well… I tried…”, Adrien replied shakily, his gaze trained to the teacher’s desk, “It’s-… been getting really hard to fight the Akumas… I mean, it wasn’t a strong one. I had him down in about an hour. But it’s still-… I won’t be able to keep it up for much longer.”

Nino bit his lip. Suddenly he felt like he was talking about something way more significant than Adrien’s sleep.

“We-… We’ll always be at your side. And we’ll support you and try our best to-… To somehow make you feel better, okay?”

Adrien finally turned to him with tears in his eyes and shook his head.

“Why are you still on my side? I-… I _physically hurt_ the girl that loved me. That I love now. Why do you still think I need friends even if I don’t deserve them?”

Nino sighed at that and pulled Adrien in a brief, one-armed hug, offering him a little, sad smile.

“Adrien, because you don’t need to do anything to deserve affection. It just-… Comes. I know you learned something different from your father but when you fuck up we won’t turn our backs. We’ll help you get better. That’s the only way to encourage you to go further.”

Adrien sighed and inconspicuously leaned toward him as Juleka and Rose passed, to make room they didn’t need for the girls.

“I’m so lucky I have you guys… Still doesn’t make the fights better, though.”

Nino patted his back as he looked up to the girls again, relieved to see them smiling.

“I wish I could just do something for you…”

“There is a way.”, suddenly a way higher voice whispered. Adrien immediately stood closer to Nino to enable Plagg to talk to both of them.

“What way?”

“Well…”, the tiny god began, “Not for Nino, that is. But for the fierce girl, Alya.”

The boys felt the hairs in their neck stand up at the mention of Alya, both for different reasons.

“How?”, Nino now asked, unsure if he was willing to know the answer.

Before Plagg could talk, though, the girls started moving and joined them in front of the door, nudging them to walk out. With that, it was too public for Plagg to speak. The boys exchanged a glance and began walking out of the school quickly, having agreed on Adrien coming with them to Nino’s place (of course only after Mari’s consent).

The way there was uneventful. Stressful for the boys, because they were burning to hear what Plagg had to say, though Mari stayed by their side. And somehow, they felt Alya shouldn’t know about this right away as well.

So they remained silent about this until they reached Nino’s house, the girls chattering a bit and the boys occasionally throwing glances to the little bulge in Adrien’s jacket.

Nino let them in and walked with them to his room, briefly greeting his parents before closing the door after his friends and throwing his bag in one corner.

“Alright, guys, uhm… Make yourself at home.”

Marinette immediately claimed the big armchair in the corner and crossed her legs. After her Alya sat down next to the armchair but Mari nudged her shoulder to offer her sitting in front of the chair. Alya shifted over to lean her head against Mari’s crossed legs and the bluenette took her hair up into her lap, beginning to comb it through with her fingers.

Nino almost had the feeling Mari wanted Alya to calm down after the Chloé incident this morning.

Adrien sat down on his bed while Nino took a seat in his desk chair before they fell into a comfortable after-school silence. Adrien fell back on the sheets and sighed.

“I’ll stay like that no matter what.”

This got him a little giggle from Marinette, to which he immediately sat up and blushed. He grinned at her while she turned her attention back to Alya’s hair, humming some melody she had stuck in her head. If Nino hadn’t taken the initiative, kicked against Adrien’s shin and nodded to the door, the blonde probably would’ve continued staring at her with a lovestruck gaze.

Luckily, Adrien understood and they excused themselves to leave the room and lock themselves in the bathroom, letting Plagg hover out in the open.

“Now what did you mean by Alya helping Adrien?”, he asked the Kwami, nervously adjusting his cap. He was absolutely terrified about Alya.

“If Adrien is too exhausted, she can take over. Well, not for long. And I will have to feed off of her energy since she’s not a chosen Black Cat but I just have a feeling that she could stand the energy. She has that in her aura.”

Adrien shook his head, spinning his ring around his finger.

“What do you mean? I-… When I’m too exhausted she can take over? What’s that mean? Her taking my ring?”

“Absolutely not.”, Nino spat, “Especially with that weird feeding off of her energy. No, I forbid it.”

Plagg rolled his eyes and shushed Nino with a quick wave of his paw.

“Listen, boy, my kitten is exhausted and Alya surely is more than willing to help. It won’t kill her, come on.”

“Yeah but the Akuma could kill her!”, Nino snapped, “Adrien has almost been killed way too often, with and without Ladybug, and there’s no cure anymore. She won’t fight. She’s not trained. And these Akumas are vicious! We’re not in tenth grade anymore. Hawkmoth isn’t sending out Wifi and Bubbles Akumas anymore, he’s sending _killers_. That you’re in the crossfire is bad enough as it is but Alya won’t do that. No.”

Adrien sighed and lowered his head, looking down at the ring. Then he faced his Kwami again.

“Plagg, how would it affect her? And what could she do?”, he cut Nino off before his best friend could even react, “I’m sorry, Nino, but you’re right, Hawkmoth _is_ sending killers. That means I might not make it as long anymore. We gotta look out for alternatives if Master Fu is not going to make a move.”

He grumbled at that, crossing his arms.

“I really don’t understand that old man… He could send me help but noooo…”

Plagg lightly patted hi neck as he settled down on Adrien’s shoulder.

“He probably can’t find anyone suited for the fox or the bee right now, Adrien. All the other Miraculous are either in use or lost.”

“O-Other Miraculous? Master Fu?”, Nino asked with a confused expression but Plagg only shook his head, floating up again.

“You don’t need to know about that. So, Adrien, Nino, sit down.”

As the boys folded their legs beneath them for Plagg to sit down on Adrien’s propped up knee, brushing over the fabric of the jeans first before speaking up again.

“There are the two key Miraculous, the Ladybug and the Black Cat. Perfect Yin and Yang, Good luck and Bad luck, Creation and Destruction. These two hold the most powerful traits out of all Miraculous. Thus, they are the heaviest to wear. Well, not weight. But Adrien and Ladybug had to hold out immense potions of magic and power flowing through their bodies, Adrien still does. So, these are the Miraculous that can’t be worn by non-chosen or, well, plain human beings.”

Nino huffed.

“That means I’m not able to wear Adrien’s ring, huh?”

Plagg bluntly nodded, shrugging.

“Yeah. You’d take it off after a few minutes because you wouldn’t be able to stand it. If you wore it longer your body would, uhm, take a bit of damage, because of the destruction powers. That is without using it. If you transformed, you’d immediately pass out because the magic would be too much for you. Though… I think you could stand the Ladybug Miraculous. I can only recognize possible kittens but Tikki told me of Ladybug auras. Could be, I’m not sure.”

Nino slowly nodded and then gestured to the door, tilting his head.

“And what would it do to Alya? I mean, if it would be bad for me, how would it affect her, if she’s more fit to wear it?”

Plagg nodded, adjusting his seat before continuing.

“I’ve seen Alya’s aura, she’s somehow okay to wear the Miraculous. We would just have to change roles, she’d be my source of energy, which I am to Adrien, and I would be the holder.”

Adrien furrowed his eyebrows, brushing over Plagg’s fur between his ears.

“But-… Would she turn into a Kwami and you into a human?”

The little god shook his head, beginning to purr a little.

“No. She would transform and still be in control of her body and all but I would kinda lead her subconsciously what to do – I don’t have to do that with you since you’re a chosen and you instinctively do that. You know how I’m always exhausted after a transformation?”, Adrien nodded and Plagg pointed at him, signaling that this was his point.

“There you go. That would be her. After she detransforms she would be the exhausted one needing water and food, not me. It’s strenuous for her physically and me mentally but it would be possible. So if you’re too exhausted to fight, kid, she’ll be a chance.”

“No way.”, the blonde and the cat turned to Nino, the boy having his arms crossed, “There’s _no way_ you will recruit Alya to let him feed off of her.”

The god rolled his eyes again and floated directly in front of Nino’s face.

“Listen here, man. No matter how overprotective you are, I am so way more. If my kitten is done he’s done and the Akumas have to be fought. So either you step aside from your _girlfriend_ and let her decide for herself or you let Adrien die and Paris be destroyed. What is your pick?”

Nino gulped and his eyes widened, staring at the tiny cat in front of him.

“She-… She’s not my girlfriend…”, he managed.

“Good!”, Plagg suddenly floated back, “Then you have no right to keep her from that anyways. So let’s go and get Alya?”

Adrien nodded and stood up, offering a hand to Nino who slapped it away, getting to his feet himself. Plagg hid in Adrien’s jacket again and they unlocked the bathroom door, heading back to Nino’s room. However, just as the brunette opened the door, everything happened way too fast. He barely saw Alya and Marinette already scrambling to get to their feet before the wall facing the road crashed into the room, filling their view with dust. He coughed, just numbly feeling the warm wave of frizzles behind him as Adrien immediately transformed.

He had to turn away because his eyes were watering and felt Chat Noir dashing past him, searching for the girls. Their voices sounded weak and scared but at least they were there. Just a second later, before the dust had even cleared, Nino felt Marinette falling into his arms. Chat Noir securely held Alya, closing the door.

“We gotta get out of here.”, he grimly said, leading Alya out while Nino and Marinette held onto each other, slowly both snapping out of the shock.

“A-Alright…”, Nino mumbled, wrapping an arm around Marinette and stumbling into the living with her, following Chat Noir with bleary, dust filled eyes.

Only slowly, as another crash sounded behind him, his mind worked together what was happening. An Akuma. A very angry Akuma. He heard a woman’s voice booming behind the door of his room and instinctively ducked over Marinette, feeling the need to protect her as they tried to run for the front door. His parents were already there, having heard the crash and immediately jumping into action.

He was just glad his siblings weren’t home yet.

His father took Marinette out of his arms, having the advantage of maintaining a clear view, so he could lead the girl way better than him. They walked down the stairs, after Chat Noir who still held on to Alya, while hearing the Akuma rampaging in their apartment, just realizing she had missed them.

“D-Do we know what she wants?!”, he called up front, where he saw the silhouette of his best friend’s leather clad form walking.

“No, not yet, but she’s attacking pointedly.”, they came to a halt in the lobby on earth level, not yet daring to step out, “Have you upset someone today?”

Alya stepped to Nino, pressing herself against Nino’s chest.

“She-… She wants me… I-It’s Chloé, sure it’s Chloé. I, oh god… Sh-She’s gonna kill me…”

Nino tightly wrapped his arms around the trembling girl, shooting a helpless glance to his parents and friends.

He had seen Alya scared, angry, joyous and excited already. He could be proud of himself to have seen her cry once, because Alya never cried.

But there were two things that he had yet never fathomed she could feel, and that was her being terrified and her being terrified _of an Akuma_. Alya had never been scared of an Akuma. Angry, sure. Excited. Determined. When it came to Akumas, she had always been the third to run in head first, after Ladybug and Chat Noir.

But right now, as she pressed her face into the fabric of his shirt, as she tightly wound her arms around his waist, trembling because she was terrified to die of the Akuma’s hands, he was completely helpless. He brushed over her back and pressed his lips together, blinking until his vision came back to him. He recognized the same helplessness and despair in both Marinette’s as well as Chat Noir’s eyes and slowly buried his nose in her hair.

“It’s okay, Alya… We’ll get you out of here… We’ll get you to safety, don’t worry… We got you…”

Chat nodded as he caught Nino’s gaze again, pointing to the back of the building.

“You four take the back entrance and flee over the other house and street. I’ll distract the Akuma and get back to you as soon as I can.”

With that he turned on his heels and sprinted out, turning to the wall where the Akuma had broken into Nino’s room while he, his parents, Alya and Marinette headed for the back. They went through the back door over the small backyard and through the other house onto the street that was parallel to the one Nino’s family lived in.

They checked if it was safe to go, then they began running down the street to get away. Nino still held on to Alya while they ran, which slowed them down a little bit but they had full faith in Chat Noir.

Until he was flung into a house on the opposite side of the street.

“Chat!”, he heard Alya scream, but his focus was more on the Akuma which hovered over the houses, lowering herself down onto the street, while Chat Noir fought to get to his feet again.

The Akuma was clad in black as well, electric blue lines covering her body and mask. She snickered as she saw Alya, pointing to her.

“You.”

The girl in Nino’s arms trembled more and they took another step back, all frozen in fear, moving mechanically.

“You took my fame. Your Ladyblog is the worst and yet you still get all the views. I feel isolated and left alone but nobody cares. Everyone is just talking about _you_.”

“Th-that’s not Chloé…”, Nino heard himself whisper, holding on tighter to Alya, “That’s-… It’s not Chloé-…”

“I will make you feel isolated instead.”, the Akuma screeched, now extending her hand, “Say bye-bye to all you love!”

Alya squinted her eyes, ready to give up. She turned away a bit, lifting her arms up above her head, bracing herself for the inevitable blow.

However, what she didn’t expect, was a rough shove from the other side, where the Akuma surely hadn’t been last when she had closed her eyes.

“ALYA, WATCH OUT!!”


	38. Chapter 38

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> New heroes are born.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one was very, very easy to write but almost too hard to read.  
> This one is a real Breeze chapter, my guys. It's going right at the heart.  
> I hope you'll survive :D  
> Have fun reading, please don't die and so not sorry. So not.  
> Enjoy~

Her head snapped back as something pushed her away on her back. The blow hissed past her ear – too far to hit her. She braced for the fall onto the pavement, her neck hurting from having been bent so unnaturally fast.

Her hands slammed onto the asphalt, closely followed by her knee and hip. She luckily had been able to slow down the fall as soon as her hands had been able to stop her so her head didn’t hit the ground as well.

As the shock slowly faded, she finally heard Marinette’s scream. In the horrible short moment that she needed to turn her head she thought her best friend had taken the blow. That she was screaming in agony, in pain, because of the Akuma.

Because of the blow that had been meant for herself.

But as her eyes adjusted, as her vision sharpened on the new, large object, she slowly understood. Marinette wasn’t screaming because of the blow. She hadn’t pushed her out of the way. She had been at least three steps away.

No.

The one holding on to her.

The one trying to protect her.

It had been Nino.

As she slowly came to her knees again she saw Chat Noir jumping at the Akuma, ripping her out of the air to tackle her down, trying to take her earphones from her. But she didn’t care.

Because as far as she knew, Nino had been by her side a mere second ago.

By the side where now a large, sturdy sphere sat. As far as she could tell as her shaky fingers touched it, it was made from metal. Some metal she didn’t want to identify now. Maybe bronze.

It had sunken into the asphalt a few centimeters, breaking open the stone to make way for the heavy object.

She leant against it, her hands flattening against the smooth, cold surface. Her heart beat way too fast and strongly but not strong enough. Her hands left tiny trails of blood, where the rough asphalt had ripped her skin open.

Nothing moved. Nothing.

Alya didn’t even feel the tears running down her cheeks as she lightly pushed against it, once, twice, stronger each time.

Nino wasn’t around so he had to be inside. He had to be. Or-… Had he been turned into it?

Terrified, she pulled her hands away. She didn’t want to hurt him. But why would the Akuma turn humans into large bronze spheres? What was the purpose?

She closed in to the sphere again, not hearing her sobs, not acknowledging Mari and Nino’s parents trying to talk to her. Her hands curled into fists and she pushed against it again, nothing moving.

Until a shudder went through the thing. A gong sounding noise reached her ears and she stopped. It had sounded like a-… Kick.

Nino’s parents immediately rushed to her side, yelling at the metal, their breaths steaming it up and vanishing just as fast. Marinette looked around, searching something as Chat Noir fought the Akuma to get further away, but Alya didn’t care.

The noises became clearer and she somehow resurfaced from the first shock. The screams got louder, Marinette shouting for Adrien, Nino’s parents yelling for their son.

None of the two answered.

She began pounding her fists against the sphere as his father did before another deep, vibrating sound suddenly broke the nothingness of this fight. They halted for a second, another one, before they slammed their hands and shoulders against the sphere again.

Isolating.

The Akuma had spoken of isolating.

Nino was _inside_.

Alya sobbed by now, trying to keep her mind off of the overwhelming fear Nino must be feeling right now. Dark, probably hot, the oxygen slowly running out because of his panicked, fast pants, hearing nothing but himself…

She squinted her eyes and shook her head, leaning her forehead against the cold surface of the metallic sphere.

“Please…”, she heard herself mumble, “Please, Nino… Nino… Please…”

She couldn’t. She couldn’t lose him.

Alya wasn’t strong enough.

She couldn’t.

“Come back… Come back to me… Please… Nino, Nino, please…”

It was hopeless. Nino was trapped in there and his only way to survive was to cleanse the Akuma. But Marinette’s Miraculous was gone. The Miraculous Cure was lost.

He wouldn’t survive.

Alya sobbed harder, not stopping to pound against the metallic prison, the unforgiving cold surface, as his mother sank to the ground, her hands useless against the unmoving sphere.

She didn’t stop slamming her shoulders and fists against the unyielding metal as his father gave up as well, leaning his back against the sphere that held his son hostage.

She didn’t even think of stopping as another gong, another vibrating sound surprised them, another desperate kick against the hard, thick bronze from the inside. She wouldn’t stop fighting for him for as long as she could.

Her mind had switched on autopilot and her hands relentlessly worked against the sphere, bringing her nothing but at least the satisfaction of a hopeless hope.

Finally, she had nothing left. The strength wore off and left her with weakness and fear. The horrible realization that they maybe wouldn’t come out of this alive. That she would lose someone to an Akuma _she_ had caused.

Left her with the breaking perception that this could be the end. The inevitable loss of a person.

She sank to her knees, her forehead tightly pressed against the metallic surface of the sturdy sphere, her hands flatly pressed into the shape of the rounding.

She couldn’t take this to be true. She couldn’t.

Marinette finally kneeled down next to her, grabbing her shoulders. She turned the brunette to look at her but as soon as their gazes met, Alya recoiled. Marinette’s eyes were so hard and powerful she could almost see the outlines of her old mask painted onto her skin.

“Where’s Adrien?!” Ladybug asked.

Alya couldn’t label her any differently right now. Her eyes spoke for her. The determination, the seriousness. That was all Ladybug.

She could tell her best friend was freaking out on the inside because she knew very well what this metallic prison meant for Nino. She was beyond terrified, Alya _knew_ that, but she could only tell by the way her eyes jumped to the sphere from time to time, by the way she clenched her teeth while speaking, by the way her jaw was set.

Everything else, her posture, her trained serious expression, her slightly furrowed eyebrows, screamed Ladybug. It was just too close to Adrien’s composure sometimes.

The fruit of years over years of concealing their feelings when on the job. The result of training to be superheroes.

Alya gulped and slowly stood up, shaky on her legs, her breaths coming in short pants. She could still feel Nino’s parents trying to overcome the prison, could still hear them sobbing and crying for their son.

“I-… I dunno-… M-Maybe he-… H-Hid-… Or-…”, she shook her head, pressing her lips together, “W-We have to g-get out of here…”

Marinette nodded, her eyes quickly jumping to the sphere behind Alya before she focused on the fight a little down the street.

“Yes, we do. But I have to go back to search for Adrien.”

Alya managed to shake her head, her mind working at light speed. She had to give her another task, another task…

“N-No, we g-gotta-… Gotta get his parents away…”, she lamely gestured to them, pressing her lips together. Marinette furrowed her eyebrows a little further, and looked down to the weeping adults, then she sighed.

“You take his father. I’ll care for his mum. You’re right. Adrien has to wait another minute.”

Alya breathed through and stepped to Nino’s father, placing a hand on his shoulder. They had to get out of here.

“Mr. Lahiffe?”, she carefully asked, “Mr. Lahiffe, we have to leave. We-… We have to get out of here.”

Her father was shocked enough to nod, relying on her to lead him. Marinette had a bit more difficulty with pulling Mrs. Lahiffe up but she managed and they began moving down the street, away from the fight. Nino’s mother straightened up a bit more the farther they went, making it easier and faster for them to move. Chat Noir had to do enough as he did, they didn’t need to be in his way then.

Alya huffed as she looked back, groaning as she saw Chat on his knees again, fighting more with himself than with the Akuma.

He had a hard time even keeping his eyes open, much less to remain on his feet. She had to do something. Just when they rounded a corner she let go of Nino’s father, causing Marinette to turn towards her.

“Get-… Get them to a safe place.”, she stuttered, trying to let her voice sound twice as brave as she felt, “I’ll-… I-I’ll distract the A-… Akuma…”

Marinette already shook her head, as did Nino’s father, but Alya took several steps back.

“She wants me.”, Alya tried reasoning with them, “I-… I can’t-… I have to-…”

With that, she turned and ran back. With a quick glance over her shoulder she saw how Nino’s father held Marinette back while his wife kneeled slumped on the ground.

“Alya! Alya, no! No, come back, come back! NO!!”

She quietly thanked Nino’s father as she ran towards the fight. Marinette shouldn’t ever be hurt again. Nino was trapped.

She had to do something.

Just when she was a few meters away from the fight, the Akuma as well as Chat Noir noticed her. There was no talking. No hesitating.

The Akuma stretched out her hand and sent a blow at her but just a second later she found herself in Chat’s arms and above the rooftops of Paris. She squinted her eyes and clung to his neck, recoiling as they set down on a roof.

“I-… I just wanted to h-h-help, I just-…”

“I know, Alya.”, his voice was way more exhausted and softer as she had feared. She opened her eyes again, finding him rapidly blinking behind the black mask, “And-… H-Honestly, I was just about to ask for your help…”

She furrowed her eyebrows as he sighed and rubbed over his face.

“I-… I talked to Plagg. He said that-… If I’m exhausted, you can take over. Temporarily but still. And I-… I just can’t. I’ve had a short night and I’m dead on my feet. This-… This Akuma is too much. I can’t fight it.”

Alya’s eyes had widened and she gulped, bringing her hands up to her chest.

“M-Me?! I-… I can’t-… You mean I as-… As Chat Noir? Transforming?!”

He nodded, his shoulders slumping.

“Yes, please… I-… Please, help me. _Plagg, claws in._ ”, his transformation fell with a green flash from his feet up and he immediately fell to his knees now that the magic of the suit didn’t keep him up anymore. His chest was heaving as he propped himself up on his thighs, legs folded beneath him. Alya sank down next to him, Plagg tumbling out of his ring and into her hands. Beneath them on the streets somewhere, the Akuma boomed that Chat Noir should show up.

“Plagg, what-…”, Alya panicked as Adrien sank against her, his forehead burning against her neck, “… What’s that mean?”

Her voice came out in a whisper as Adrien lightly whimpered, weakly lifting his hand with the ring. She took it with one of hers but didn’t pull off the ring yet.

The tiny god leaned against her thumb, sighing as he eyed his chosen.

“He’s exhausted. He need to rest and you can temporarily substitute him. I’ll guide you and, well, feed off of your energy, but you can’t stay transformed for long, since you’re not a chosen. Long story short, you need to kick that Akuma’s butt today. You need to be there for Adrien.”

Alya gulped again, brushing over Adrien’s ring with her thumb.

“It’ll-… It’ll only be temporary?”

“Yes.”, the Kwami replied firmly while floating up again, “You’ll be exhausted after the transformation but I promise to you, we’ll beat that Akuma. It’ll feel like a trance, like a dream for you. I’ll lead you.”

She nodded, carefully pulling off Adrien’s ring. He gave a relieved sigh, nuzzling closer to her neck.

“Will-… Will he be okay?”, she carefully asked, now brushing over his hair and holding him close, “He feels pretty warm.”

The Kwami obviously tried to fight his worries but she saw how he struggled.

“He’ll-… He’ll be okay. Also, it might be reasonable to drop him off in Nino’s apartment, in case someone misses him.”

Alya sighed and slid the ring onto her finger, biting her lip as she felt the unnatural cold radiating from it. Slowly, she felt her hand growing numb, as if someone had put a light pressure on it.

“Y-Yeah-… Sure…”, she made a fist as the numbness wandered up her arm, “Is-… Is this normal?”

Plagg tapped the tip of her finger.

“A little numb? Yes. It’s the magic and the power spreading in its new host.”

She huffed as she felt it moving through her chest, over her heart, making it a little harder to breathe.

“Will it stay?”

“No, it’ll die down after a minute or so. Your aura is good, your body and mind are obviously accepting the Miraculous.”

“A-Accepting it?”, she stuttered, feeling a little fuzzy in her head as she felt the same numbness spreading in her head and down her other arm and stomach.

“Yes, the Miraculous is taking its new host and settling. It’ll feel weird for a minute but believe me, you would’ve taken it off already if your body and the ring had divested each other.”

She nodded, now feeling the numbness in her hand fading but still travelling down her legs.

“Alright, uhm, and-… C-Can I fight normally with this?”

He made a vague gesture with his tiny paws, watching her clenching and unclenching a fist on her ringed hand.

“Well, I will fight for you and you will have all the normal abilities of a Black Cat wielder, just that you aren’t a chosen. So everything will be less powerful. But don’t worry, I’ll handle that, I’ve worked with non-chosen’s before. Oh, and Adrien doesn’t want to use cataclysm since it would set off the balance between the Yin and Yang but you can use it. Just keep in mind that you’ll de-”

“… Detransform within five minutes, got it.”

Plagg nodded approvingly, then he watched as Alya shakily laid Adrien down on the roof and stood up.

“Are you ready?”, he carefully asked, flinching a little when he heard the Akuma furiously stomping around down on the streets.

The girl looked down to the ring on her hand and shakily breathed through, then she remembered Nino down there, trapped in the metallic sphere.

“I’ll do my best.”, she replied, quietly but with a determined undertone to her voice, “I certainly will.”

The little Kwami floated a little higher, nodding at her words.

“You know the phrase?”

Alya still looked at the ring, then she nodded, breaking her gaze away to look at the tiny god.

“ _Plagg, claws out._ ”


	39. Chapter 39

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Must be embarassing when your girlfriend saves you ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A special chapter deserves a special length!  
> And because it's so very special, it's even almost double length ;)  
> Hope you guys enjoy~
> 
> (And yes, the summary is sarcastic. It's not embarassing if your girlfriend saves you, it's cool. Thank you.)

It felt like a warm wave as Plagg got sucked into the ring, the transformation washing over her body with a flash of green.

She gulped as she felt the mask appearing on her face, feeling natural and light but bearing a weight she almost couldn’t carry. Her fingers brushed over her thighs and she was suddenly aware of the claws that had built up on her fingertips. She eyed her hands, clad in a leather-like material. It was probably spandex, though. Her eyes travelled down her chest, her stomach and legs and she suddenly felt very weird, looking down on herself and seeing just what she had always desired to be – a superhero.

She had long before accepted, as Ladybug and Chat Noir had appeared, that superheroes were real. That the stories from her comics could become something very vivid.

She breathed faster as she lifted one foot, recognizing the Chat Noir boots that Adrien normally wore. The suit was like a second skin to her and even if she felt a little exposed, it was just as comfortable. Plagg hadn’t made any changes to the suit so she basically didn’t look any different. The suit was still black, the cat ears on her head and her hair even more unruly and wild as usual.

She felt-… Different. As if she was playing an instrument, as if-… As if her body knew for her what she had to do. Alya breathed through and clenched a fist, nodding.

Plagg had told her it would be like this and she didn’t have too much time.

With a swift movement she scooped up Adrien and cradled him close to her chest, beginning to run down the roof towards where she last saw Marinette and Nino’s parents. The boy curled up against her and she felt an incredible wave of affection towards him, just wanting to bring him to bed, tuck him in and keep the lights out for three days, providing him sleep, food and cuddles.

Shaking her head, she jumped down over to the next roof, her chesire eyes searching her best friend’s blue hair.

“Damnit Plagg, it was so obvious you’d go all Papa on him _now_.”, Alya frowned as Adrien whimpered at a rather inelegant landing, safe but rough. Another wave of affection made her stumble, gripping him tighter, “Plagg, relax, I got him. We gotta focus.”

She finally spotted her best friend, jumping down to the streets. Adrien lost his consciousness as soon as they set down on the asphalt, his head rolling against her chest. Marinette immediately spun around, her eyes narrowing at the new Chat Noir.

“Who-… Who are you?”, she skeptically asked, unsure about the superhero who obviously wasn’t her partner, “And-… Is that A-Adrien?!”

Alya carefully gave the blonde, unconscious boy over to Nino’s father, then taking a step back again.

“I’m a temporary substitute. Chat Noir couldn’t make it, he was exhausted and asked me to fight the Akuma. I-… I, uhm, found this civilian in a destroyed apartment.”

Marinette stayed skeptical, probably asking herself who knew about Chat’s real identity, but Alya just saluted and hinted to a bow.

“I have an akuma to fight. Please bring the civilians to safety.”

Before the bluenette could respond, Alya already jumped off and ran towards the Akuma who still searched for the original Chat Noir and her civilian form on the streets.

“You just had to do that gesture, didn’t you…?”, she grumbled while her body worked seamlessly with the surroundings. She already felt her energy draining from her, that must’ve been what Plagg had talked about, so she did feel a little nervous but she tried not to pay it any mind. She would be okay.

The Akuma bellowed down on the streets, shouting for Chat Noir to reappear again. This Akuma apparently wasn’t really focused on destroying anything or attacking civilians (except herself) so she wouldn’t have to worry about anything but, well, herself. Her body crouched down on a roof, just out of sight of the Akuma but she could overlook everything. Her gaze fell on the metallic sphere in the middle of the street, tears welling up in her eyes.

Yes, she did have something else to worry about.

Nino.

She gulped and her hand brushed over her eyes, a feeling like comfort coming to her mind. Plagg could apparently set off feelings inside her, even if they couldn’t communicate. She smiled gratefully, knowing he felt what she felt. And somehow, he was able to give her the reassurance that everything would be okay.

She narrowed her eyes, gulping down the rest of her tears, and focused on the Akuma. She was standing too close to the metallic sphere for Alya’s liking. So she had to lure her away, not to damage Nino’s prison in any way and thus injure him. The girl quietly snuck past the Akuma to jump down to the street behind her, standing tall.

The Akuma was in her earphones so she had to be fast. No problem with that, especially with Plagg’s help. She just had to take care of her blasts.

“Hey, searching for me?”, she called out, causing the Akuma to whip around and send a blow in her direction. She felt her body move automatically, felt her muscles being pulled towards the side to take her with them. It was weird not to fight against that but she completely trusted the Kwami and let him take control.

“You’re a different Chat Noir.”, the Akuma snarled and Alya grimaced.

“You don’t say…”, she mumbled while she dodged another blast by doing multiple backflips. That was-… New…? Her landing was a perfect three-pointer and she gulped as the world stopped spinning. She still had to get used to that. Especially since it felt like she was sitting in a rollercoaster.

“Stand still!”, the woman yelled but Alya ran to the side, another blast breaking up the street beside her, aiming to hint to an attack from the side before ducking to the other as soon as she was close enough, to surprise the Akuma.

“Let me do my job and give me your Miraculous!”

Alya snickered involuntarily, briefly jumping out of the way of another blow before crouching down, closely sliding past the Akuma to jump up behind her. Her plan had been to grab the akumatized object then but she didn’t see the Akuma’s elbow coming and almost hitting her. She immediately moved in to engage her in close combat, knowing Plagg would lead her well.

“What’s your name anyway?”, she asked, slicing her claws over the suit of the Akuma, not leaving any damage but irritating her anyway.

“It’s Websolator! And now give me your Miraculous!”

Alya rolled her eyes, ducking beneath another blow before taking a hold of her arm, throwing her over her shoulder before being pulled right after her.

“Your name is bullshit. And sorry, it’s just-”, her voice died and she gulped, quietly thanking Plagg for blocking her throat. She had almost given Hawkmoth information he didn’t need to know, _shouldn’t_ know. He certainly shouldn’t realize why another Chat Noir was standing in front of his Akuma.

They continued fighting closely and fiercely until Alya felt her eyes briefly closing because of the quickly uprising exhaustion. The ring mercilessly drained her energy and it wasn’t that her muscles were beginning to burn but more that she began feeling sleepy.

Suddenly, she took a blow right to her jaw, causing her to fly backwards. She knew now how much Adrien could take when in the suit, it hurt but not as much as it should. She hit the ground with her back, a groan escaping her throat as the air was pressed out of her lungs.

Before she could defend or orientate herself, the Akuma was on top of her, pushing her down. A violet outline of a butterfly appeared on her face and Alya tried fighting against her grip but didn’t succeed.

“Now I got you.”, Websolator grinned, already taking her hand and forcing her fist apart to take the ring, “I’ll take your Miraculous. I’ll bring it to Hawkmoth and then I’ll kill that Ladyblog girl.”

“No-… No!”, she yelled, kicking her knee upwards to let the Akuma fall forward, then she let her head snap up to let her forehead crash against Websolator’s nose in a last attempt to get the Miraculous to safety. The Akuma yowled and held her nose, making it easy for Alya and Plagg to throw her off and get to her feet again. The Akuma held her nose and scowled at her, a bit of red coloring her hand.

“You bitch!”, she screeched, inspecting the blood on her hand before bringing it back to her nose again, “You-… You broke my nose!”

“Well, you tried to kill me…”, Alya sourly noted under her breath while rubbing her jaw. Her gaze fell on the metallic sphere once more and she furrowed her eyebrows, knowing she had to be faster.

But before she could act again, the Akuma was on her feet, her hand still pressed to her face and her expression contorted in pain.

“You’ll be very, very sorry for that.”

“Doubt it.”, she retorted, readying herself by lifting her fists. Plagg really did a good job in making her intimidating.

The woman in front of her sneered at that and jumped towards her but Alya merely stepped to the side, bringing her fists together and making the Akuma stumble. The woman bent forward and stumbled past her, in an attempt to catch herself, as Alya brought her elbows down on her back. Websolator immediately went to the ground and Alya was quick to sit down on her back to rip the earphones out of her ears. She crushed them between her fingers, a dark Akuma fluttering out. Quickly standing up and unhooking the bell from her collar, she threw it up and captured the evil butterfly, trapping it in her now silver bell.

The woman to her feet detransformed, still holding her nose.

“Wh-What-… Oww…”, she groaned. Alya quickly kneeled down, inspecting the woman’s face.

“It’s broken.”, she softly stated while it took everything not to immediately somehow free Nino. After all she did have a job to do, “Do you have a phone on you?”

The woman nodded, pulling out her phone for Alya to take. She quickly dialed the emergency call and asked for an ambulance to come to their location.

“Sit up and hold fabric to your nose, it’s gotta stop the bleeding. Wait here, an ambulance is on its way.”

The woman nodded and sat up, whining a little before grabbing her shirt, pressing it to her nose.

“Thank you, uh-… You’re not Chat Noir… Right?”

“I’m helping.”, Alya replied, shrugging as she stood up, “But I gotta save someone else now. Just stay calm and wait here, okay? Don’t stand up.”

She rolled her shoulders and turned, her eyes already burning as her gaze once again found the metallic sphere in the middle of the street like a magnet. She had to somehow get him out.

Her feet moved automatically as she began walking towards the heavy, round prison, holding Nino hostage. She _had to_ get him out.

“Please tell me you’re okay…”, she mumbled, terrified as she closed in to the big sphere, her claws brushing over the smooth, cold surface as she reached it, “Please be okay…”

She sniffled as she lifted her hand, eyeing the ring. A flash of fear, a hint of _Don’t do this_ appeared in her mind but she didn’t care that Plagg tried to keep her from doing it. Tried pushing her to another solution. She knew cataclysm wasn’t meant for her. She knew she was exhausted and would probably be even more so as soon as the transformation would fall.

But she didn’t care. She didn’t have any time and had to get him out. The sphere sounded nearly empty so it had to be a prison but she couldn’t hear him so the walls had to be really thick. Turning it to dust would endanger Nino. So she had to cut it open, somehow.

Alya gulped and lifted her hand.

“ _C-Cataclysm_!”

An immense pain shot through her arm and she yelled, clutching her elbow as dark magic started to swirl around the ring, around her hand. She forced herself back up on her feet and concentrated on what she wanted, ignoring the pain that turned into a seething heat, forcing itself through her body. She began at the very bottom, dragging her claw along the surface of the metal in a straight line, beginning at the juncture between asphalt and metal. Though she stayed watchful that the side on which she would get Nino out couldn’t provide the akumatized victim any sight.

She didn’t need anyone claiming the reporter of the Ladyblog had detransformed from being Chat Noir.

While jumping onto the sphere she continued cutting through the thick bronze and slid down on the other side, still keeping her claw on the surface until she touched down again. The metal hissed and groaned as she leapt on top again, hooking her claws into the small rift that she had created with her cut as the pain of cataclysm subsided, luckily. Her vision began to swim in and out of focus from exhausting as she forced it apart, her eyes widening at the thickness of the metal.

As soon as the rift was big enough she pushed it further apart with her legs, her hands providing the needed grip for her legs. Then finally, the metal on the bottom broke through and the slightly smaller half fell off, falling onto the asphalt with its round side and continuing to sway with a heavy, grinding sound.

Alya immediately jumped down and swallowed thickly at the small, round space in which Nino laid, curled up in a ball. The sphere had been way taller and bigger than her, surely holding a diameter of two meters, but the little room inside was barely enough for Nino to lay without having to be in a fetus position. Barely.

She softly wrapped one of her arms around his upper back and brought the other beneath his knee bends, turning him towards her and lifting him out to lower him down to the ground.

“ _Plagg, claws in_.”, she mumbled, her body slumping over as her transformation fell. Her bones felt heavy and her muscles as if they were made of pudding. The little Kwami shot out of the ring and immediately started floating in front of her face.

“Alya? Alya, are you okay?”, she shakily kept herself on her knees, ignoring Plagg’s question, carefully brushing a strand of hair out of Nino’s face as she cradled his head in her lap.

“Nino…”, she whispered, now caressing his cheek. He was sweating, his skin unnaturally cold at some places. It must’ve been pretty warm in there. And the oxygen must’ve gone out pretty quickly.

“Hey, talk to me. Are you okay? Show me your hand!”, Plagg floated into her vision, blocking her sight on Nino. She blinked a few times, trying to keep her mind together.

“Yeah, I-… Sleepy, but-… Nino…”, the tiny god just nodded.

“He’s gonna be alright.”

Plagg lowered himself down to her arm on which she carried the Miraculous, inspecting the multiple small cuts covering her hand and wrist. She hadn’t noticed them up until now. They were all very tiny, just lines of maybe a few millimeters, stretching along her arm. Not like Marinette’s scars.

The tiny cat gingerly brushed over the cuts, sighing when he got to a bigger one.

“That was the cataclysm. Your body is not made to withstand such force. So your skin burst open. That’s what I was trying to tell you in the transformation.”

“The magic just-… Searched its way out? Out of-… Me?”, she forced herself to ask, her lips moving as if they were numb.

“Yes.”, the Kwami shortly replied, “Let’s just hope these wounds aren’t magical.”

“And the Akuma?”

“Trapped.”, Plagg assured her briefly, still checking on her arm and the wounds, “In the bell. Now in the ring. Nothing to worry about.”

Alya just managed to nod, then she focused on Nino again. He was breathing and when she put her fingers on his neck, to check for a pulse, she felt the weak but steady beating against her fingertips. He looked so still… So pale…

“Nino, please… Please wake up… You’re safe, c’mon…”

She sobbed as he didn’t react at first, brushing over his cheek.

“Please… Please, Nino…”

His pulse was there, she had checked it, and he was breathing as well, even if it was shallow, so why didn’t he wake up? Why didn’t he-

With a soft gasp he finally opened his eyes at the fresh air powering his brain again and confusedly looked around, furrowing his eyebrows.

“… Where-… What-…”, he croaked, his eyes jumping around until he found her face. She tried a smile and bent down to kiss his forehead.

“You’re safe… You’re safe, you big idiot… Just saving me like that, you dumbo…”, she sobbed and leant her forehead against his, baring her teeth, “… Never-… Never d-do that again-…”

His shaky hand came up to brush a tear away, then his nose bumped against hers.

“… I had to, Alya…”, he breathed, “I had to… I couldn’t let you-… I couldn’t bear seeing you-”

She forced a laugh only to make way for her sobs again.

“Well, me neither!”

He sighed and nudged his nose against hers, softly begging her to listen.

“Alya, Alya, I couldn’t help it. I-… I had to keep you safe, I-… You can’t get hurt… I can’t see you getting hurt, I’m not strong enough…”, he whispered, shaking his head. She sobbed, her whole body shaking as he repeated the same feeling she had felt for him.

“Then we’re e-even…”, she cried, wrapping her arms around him tighter, “I can’t watch you getting hurt as well…”

He chuckled lightly, brushing away another tear.

“We end up in a tie, huh?”

“You idiot!”, she was tempted to slap him but all her traitorous hand did was caressing his cheek, “You big, dumb, selfless, idiotic-”, before she even realized what she was doing she pressed her lips against his.

She couldn’t find the right words. She could never find the right words. He was just there and had taken the danger of death for her without a second thought. She couldn’t express how grateful, how amazed she was. Even if she titled him an idiot, it just showed her worry for him.

And to show him her love, she had to kiss him.

She had to show him what she felt.

His hand gently moved from her cheek to the back of her head and he kissed her back, his thumb softly moving on her hairline.

“… I couldn’t lose you…”, she mumbled under tears, feeling his breath on her lips, “… I can’t-… Please-… Please don’t leave me…”

He shook his head, giving her another kiss.

“I won’t ever.”, he promised, “I won’t leave you. We’ll stay together, Alya… We won’t lose each other.”

“Good!”, she cried, desperately pressing her lips against his, again and again, convincing herself that he was okay, that he was there and alive and sweaty and _there_ , “Because-… Because you’re staying with me now… Don’t ever jump in front of an Akuma ever again. Don’t ever.”

She felt him smirking, his teeth brushing over her lip as he kissed her again, needing to feel her just as desperately.

“But only if you promise the same.”, he prompted, a promise that he knew she couldn’t hold. He was okay with that – as long as he could be by her side and break his promise just as much as she would break hers.

Alya sobbed as she nodded, hugging him tighter and kissing him another time, her lips feeling salty and slippery by now as they held on to each other.

“I promise…”, she whispered against him, her breath tickling his nose, “I promise…”

Only very slowly and unwillingly, they parted from each other so that Nino could sit up. He already felt better now that he was free but as soon as his dizziness faded he noticed how slumped Alya sat. She could barely hold her eyes open.

“Alya, are you-… What happened?”

She smiled weakly, shrugging.

“… I helped.”, the girl finally replied and his eyes widened as he understood. As he saw the ring on her finger, saw Plagg lowering himself down on her shoulder and the multiple tiny cuts, barely even bleeding, where cataclysm had ripped open her arm.

“No… No, no, no…”, Nino quickly shifted closer to her again, gingerly resting her arm in his lap, “You transformed?! Alya, I-… You shouldn’t have done that! I talked about it with Adrien and I forbid him to do it, you could’ve gotten really hurt! You could’ve died, Alya!”

Just merely resting her forehead against his shoulders she breathed through, sleepily enjoying his warmth.

“I know… But I had to help Adrien, he’s-… He’s exhausted, he couldn’t have done it…”, he rubbed over her back and sighed in relief as she continued, “I’ll give the ring back to him as soon as I get the chance. I just-… I had to help him… I had to save you…”

Nino felt his face heating up as she nuzzled his neck, her hands snaking around his waist.

“Still, Alya, you-… You’ll never do it again, understood? Never ever.”

She huffed and nodded, her fingers lazily clenching into his shirt on his back.

“No… I won’t… I don’t wanna… C-Cataclysm was terrifying… Because of that, my arm-…”

He felt the urge to brush over her arm, to kiss every single tiny cut to take her pain from her.

“You used cataclysm? And it hurt you?”

She didn’t reply but it was answer enough for him.

As carefully as he could he pulled Adrien’s Miraculous off her finger and nodded to Plagg as he put it in his pocket.

“I’ll keep it safe until I can give it back to Adrien.”

The Kwami nodded gratefully, patting Alya’s shoulder.

“She’ll be alright, don’t worry. The only thing that could be is that the wounds from cataclysm are magical, then they’d heal slowly and respond to a few things but most likely that won’t be the case.”

Nino furrowed his eyes as he already heard the sirens of an ambulance blaring in the distance, closing in on their location. Someone must’ve called them.

“Responding to what?”

Plagg shrugged.

“Magical influences. If she transforms again they’ll feel uncomfortable and if she uses cataclysm they’ll get worse. And if magic happens around her, she’ll feel the wounds flaring up. But I don’t think that’ll happen.”

He nodded in understanding and adjusted Alya so that she could lean against him more comfortably, now holding her so that she could nuzzle closer to his neck. She sighed and curled up against him, her breath evening out as she slowly slipped into a well-deserved sleep.

“So-… Even if the wounds are magical, she could live with that?”

“Certainly.”, Plagg confirmed with a tight smile, “Nothing to worry about there.”

The boy smiled as he looked down to Alya, softly brushing over her cheek as she slept. She sighed lightly, then a small smile snuck on her lips.

“It’s alright…”, he murmured to her, leaning his lips on her forehead, “I got you… We’re both safe now.”

 

* * *

 

“Adrien? Adrien, can you hear me?”

He groaned another time, shaking his head. He didn’t wanna get up just now.

“Adrien, please… C’mon. I gotta know if you have any injuries.”

He unwillingly opened his eyes, blinking a few times before he recognized Marinette. He immediately recoiled, sitting up and bonking their heads together. They both groaned simultaneously but she caught herself faster again, placing a hand on his shoulder while she still rubbed the spot where his head had hit her.

“Don’t-… Don’t panic, okay? You’re in safety. I just wanna check if you have any injuries that the emergency doctors should know of. They’re around the corner but I wanted to wake you up first. Mr. and Mrs. Lahiffe alre-”

He was very, very sorry for interrupting her but a more urgent thought had come to his mind.

“M-Marinette… Where’s-… Where’s Alya…?”

Her eyes went wide and she looked around.

“I-… I actually don’t-… Oh god, I didn’t even ask when the other Chat Noir dropped you off with us! I mean, sh-she was probably stressed and I was stressed but I-… I forgot Alya ran right into the fight, oh god!”

Adrien managed to slide back against the house wall to lean on that, then he placed a hand on Marinette’s thigh.

“I-… I’m sure she’s okay. Hey, Marinette, I’m sure it’ll be fine.”

She sniffled and took her hands out of her hair again were she had entangled them with each other, completely destroying the smoothness. He reached out to comb through it with his fingers, trying to smooth it down again, not noticing his nor her blush.

“She’s okay. And I am, too. I’m fine, just tired.”

Marinette slowly lost the tension in her shoulders and calmed down at his words, then she offered a hand to him to help him up.

“Alright… Alright. Sorry for freaking out.”

He chuckled, coming to his feet with her help. He already felt much better.

“Wanna look after our friends?”

She lightly flushed at that again, nodding as he didn’t let go of her hand at first. It took him a moment to realize he still hadn’t let go, then he did it too quickly and lifted his hand to his hair instead.

“Uhm, yeah, anyways, uh-…”, he tried laughing it off but Marinette had already smiled at him and turned, about to go look after their friends. Only now the tension returned to her shoulders, probably not just because of Alya but also because of Nino. He had, after all, been trapped in a bronze sphere all that time. Adrien gulped, now feeling fear creeping up his throat.

He hadn’t thought about his best friend. Had Alya managed to save him?  
Had someone cut it open?

They rounded the corner and Adrien quickly took hold of Marinette’s had again, already fearing the worst when they made their way over to the bronze sphere that looked undamaged from their angle.

Was-… Nino still inside?

He gulped, lightly squeezing Marinette’s hand. Neither of them cared now. This was seeking for comfort, not in any means something different.

An ambulance stood in the streets, one emergency doctor in their sight kneeling beside a woman. This must’ve been the Akuma. Adrien wanted to check on her as well but first, he wanted to make sure his friend was alright.

What the two of them didn’t expect, though, as they rounded the metallic sphere, was an emergency doctor wrapping a bandage around Alya’s arm while she was sitting on the ground snuggled up to Nino, giving him a kiss from time to time.

The emergency doctor smiled as she finished and stood up, leaving them to join her comrade with the akumatized victim, then Alya and Nino turned to each other again. They didn’t even notice Adrien and Marinette standing a few steps away from them, gaping.

“Uhm-…”, Adrien finally cleared his throat and their friends jumped, not letting go of each other but stopping to kiss, “When did this happen?”


	40. Chapter 40

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Progress on both fronts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm getting up with lamer and lamer summaries~  
> Anyway!  
> Sorry the chapter is up so late. I was busy all weekend and I'm a little sleep deprived. But here it is! The chapter leading up to something big ;)  
> I hope you'll enjoy ;P  
> 'Til the next chapter~

It didn’t take long for them to calm down after this shock. Sure, they did need two days to fully come to terms with what had happened, especially Alya and Nino, but they were quick to laugh together again. Partly a reason for that was the ring that rested on Adrien’s hand again instead of Alya’s. And especially since Marinette seemed to get more and more comfortable the more time she spent with them, the longer they stayed together. It had been weeks now and she slowly fell back to her old self again. Teasing Alya, quipping at Nino and even talking with Adrien for hours.

The only thing that had changed.

She was much more comfortable around him. At least for her condition.

She still preferred to sit alone in the classroom and she still didn’t want to go out into the streets alone.

_Understandable_ , as Alya put it, even if it weighed down on them a little.

Marinette had suffered for months. It was only natural for her to still be skeptical, even if she had found a tight circle of supporters in her family, friends and classmates. Even if she started to trust again, even if the therapy left her more and more relaxed.

Even if Chloé didn’t attack her again but rather stayed sitting on her seat, not even looking at her since Alya had scolded her.

Even if it massively helped her that Alya and Nino knew about her secret. But they both could still tell that she was scared. Still scared. Of strangers. And – partly – of her own partner as well.

Well, she had expressed to Alya that she wanted to talk to him. That she even wanted to reveal herself to him, to make him help her get back her Miraculous. Get back Tikki. She was incredibly worried about her little friend.

But at the same time, she didn’t know how he would react to her. She didn’t know if he would believe her or plunge her back into the same hole she had fallen into before again, believing she lied to him.

Alya always had to bite back that she knew exactly how he would react.

Because while she wasn’t sure how Adrien would feel about her telling him she was Ladybug, if he would believe her or not that is, he would surely be lovestruck anyway. Making the chances of believing her higher. Besides, Alya had found out she was Ladybug without her help and had been able to believe it. If Marinette willingly revealed herself to him and gave him information only Ladybug could know, how much would he be willing to deny it?

Alya could bet her whole money that he would believe her – only if that stupid, oblivious, lovestruck Agreste boy would get his butt moving and pay her a damn visit! Even if Marinette chickened out, he would still have an opportunity to come clean with her with his alter ego! He still had to do that.

It was really frustrating to watch him look at Marinette as if she was the light of the world while tearing himself apart because of his guilt. She had started to trust Adrien, sure, but Chat Noir was still an enemy. At least that’s what he told himself.

And on top of being stupid, oblivious and lovestruck, he was stubborn. Nobody could tell him otherwise – sadly. It was beyond frustrating for Alya to not tell him Marinette was Ladybug and it was especially frustrating not to tell her Adrien was Chat Noir.

But when thinking about doing it while sitting in Marinette’s living room or talking to Adrien in school, she immediately started feeling guilty.

The secret identities were a secret. She didn’t have the right in the first place to find out about them and it especially wasn’t her place to just blab to everyone who they were. It had already been wrong to give Nino the knowledge of both identities but telling each other? That was a limit she just couldn’t cross. As frustrating as it was.

Two days after the incident where Alya had substituted Adrien as Chat Noir they were sitting in the school yard, doing some of their homework in the lunch break. Though, Adrien’s thoughts strayed in a different direction as he looked up again to see Marinette deeply bent over her paper, her bangs hiding her face. They were brushing against the table as she mumbled something about the sentence she was trying to formulate. Alya glanced over to her and leant closer to decipher what she had written. Then she gave her an advice on another word she could use and even though Marinette jumped a little, she turned to her best friend with a smile, thanking her.

Adrien sighed.

Marinette was still a bit uneasy, he knew that. But he couldn’t help himself to look at her and recognize the same strong girl he had gotten to know in tenth grade.

She was still the same Marinette he had met, he had slowly learned more about in the past years and the same girl he had fallen in love with. She turned back to her paper but caught his gaze, her eyes changing to cautious. Of course, she would be, he scolded himself. With someone staring at her it had never been something good in the past months. He quickly gave her a shy smile, then bend back over his own paper. In the corners of his eyes he saw Alya looking at him but he kept his head down.

The bluenette relaxed again, continuing to work on her task, as Alya began smiling. No, smirking.

Adrien gulped, not sensing something good on this.

Of course she had noticed how Adrien and Marinette had grown closer over the course of the past days. Ever since the Akuma attack Marinette had more and more found back to her old self, even beginning to tease her friends again.

For a few minutes it remained calm around them until Adrien felt someone shifting. Nino beside him adjusted his seat to stretch his legs more, shortly after he felt Alya doing the same. As he leant back he risked a glance down and confirmed what he had already assumed. Nino’s and Alya’s legs were connected, in a casual way just leaning against each other, but he knew Alya.

He decided to just play along, not wanting to cause unnecessary drama and break the comfortable silence. Until he saw Alya nodding at Nino, then tilting her head. He looked up and saw Nino furrowing his eyebrows but then his face lightened up.

His best friend pushed his stuff to lay beside Alya’s and stood up to join her on the girl’s bench of the two-sided table. He sat down as close as he could to Alya and she immediately leant her head on his shoulder, the boy shifting so he could rest his cheek on her head.

Adrien threw a glance at Marinette and felt his cheeks heating up as Alya grinned.

Oh, he knew what she was up to. He knew so well what she was up to and while he tried not to let himself be teased, he just couldn’t help imagining what it would be like with Marinette, snuggling in this position.

He locked his gaze on his paper but couldn’t help but notice how Alya stretched up to give Nino a small kiss before continuing on her homework. His best friend smirked and Adrien felt his chest tighten.

He wanted to try this with Marinette. He wanted to feel her against him as well, wanted to hold her close, even sneak an arm around her waist as Nino did just now. He wanted her to lean against him as if she trusted him completely, wanted her to straighten up and press a soft kiss to his lips…

Before he knew it, a small, dreamy smile played around the corners of his mouth. Feeling her kissing him-… That’d be nice…

Once again, Alya smirked, knowing she had him now. She could see his mind working, his fingers stopping every now and then. Adrien hated it. She had all control over him now and she knew it. Whatever she and Nino would do, Adrien would imagine it with Marinette.

When Nino turned his head to bury his nose in Alya’s hair, Adrien would ask himself what Marinette’s hair smelled like. _Vanilla_ , his traitorous mind answered. Vanilla and bakery. Buttery dough. Sweet, overall, sweet and soft.

When Alya reached up to brush over Nino’s chin before pulling on his collar, asking him about a question she sat on, he imagined how it would tug on his heartstrings if Marinette did that. When Nino answered, his voice soft with affection and patience, he imagined how his own voice would rumble against her temple, how it would feel to see her understanding something because he explained it to her or made a suggestion on how she could maybe solve the problem.

When Nino nudged her temple with his nose and asked if they could stay together after school and when Alya answered yes, he squinted his eyes, almost unable to take it any longer. He knew Marinette would probably get the shock of her life if his feet suddenly touched hers. But he also knew that Alya wouldn’t stop until he made a move. Damnit…

It stayed silent for a few moments, though, and Adrien allowed himself to focus on schoolwork. That was his mistake.

Alya straightened, stretching a bit. Nino’s hand on her waist slipped to her stomach as he pulled her closer, earning a smile from her. Adrien could unmistakably recognize the smirk Nino threw at his friend.

Alya lowered her arms again and nudged his jaw with her nose, then the boy turned back to her and pressed his lips to hers. Adrien rolled his eyes, resisting the urge to leave the table for a quick toilet break to collect himself again. But his friends stayed latched onto each other like that. And stayed like that. And stayed like that. And-

“Guys, for real?”, he heard Marinette speaking up as he forced himself to keep his gaze on his paper. Finally, he risked a glance just as Alya lazily swatted back at Marinette, not even remotely coming close to hitting her in any way. Marinette rolled her eyes as Alya turned more towards Nino, completely ignoring everything around the couple.

The blonde only rewarded his friends with a short glance before jumping back to her again. She eyed Alya for a moment longer, something like annoyance as well as relief and happiness dancing over her face. Adrien knew she was overjoyed Alya had gotten together with Nino. Ever since the zoo incident during the Animan attack she had hoped for them to become a couple. Adrien knew because she had on more than one occasion asked him to somehow set something up to get their friends together, especially in the last year after they had gotten a little more comfortable around each other.

Then their gazes met again but much to his surprise, she didn’t show any caution or wariness. Instead, she shot him a small grin before looking back down to her stuff. He felt his cheeks darkening again since they started to become hot but before he could even look away again she ended a sentence with a firm dot, leaning back.

“I’m finished. If you’re just gonna kiss I’ll bring some stuff home, be right back.”

She closed her history book and put it on top of her paper to stuff both things in her bag, shouldering it. It wasn’t much, just a little smile at him, but he took it as an invitation.

“U-Uh, I-I’ll come with you! I-I mean, if that’s okay?”

She halted as he already stood up, biting her lip. Then she nodded.

“Alright! We’ll be right back, Alya.”

Her best friend didn’t even react anymore. Adrien had to keep his smirk to himself as he understood how much the teasing had both succeeded as well as backfired. Well… Or it had just succeeded, who knew.

He and Marinette left the school, both looking ahead instead of to each other. Until they reached the end of the stairs. Adrien could still feel his heart aching at the possibilities what she could do with him. He’d be happy with a simple hug already, he’d be happy with just looking at her!

But he wanted her to be happy. He wanted her to be at ease and be around someone, a someone like him, to trust completely. He felt he couldn’t be that in the position he was in right now.

(And maybe a tiny, little, selfish part of him wanted to hold her close, just for him.)

When they were out of their friends’ sight, even if they weren’t looking anyway, Adrien finally turned to Marinette, softly stopping her on her shoulder.

She hesitated, being stopped by someone was not something she wanted to be reminded of, but she let him be. Because it was Adrien, she knew it was Adrien, and his touch had been so hesitant and careful. So she turned to him with a smile and a question on her lips as he already spoke up.

“Hey-… Marinette?”

She nodded, tilting her head

“Yes, Adrien?”, she asked, still careful and ready to take a step back but remaining so close to him. He was a friend, a good friend.

“Hey, uh-… I-… I wanted to know if you were feeling better?”

A small smile danced around her lips as she noticed that he was somehow nervous, avoiding her eyes but then staring at her again.

“Yeah, I’m feeling better.”, she grinned, “Why do you ask? I mean-…”

“Huh-… Haha, yeah uh, just to-… Just to make sure. I’m glad! So, uh, anyway, are you free today? ‘Cuz I wondered if you wanted to hang out or something-… Because Alya and Nino are obviously busy and, uhm… Maybe, uh, if you’re not free or if you don’t want to, I don’t want to pressure you or something, sooo-…”

“I have time.”, she offered calmly, her smile widening at his antics.

He returned her smile, one of his hands flying to the back of his head, blushing a bit.

“Cool, so-… Uh, after school at my place?”

“Yeah, sounds good. I just wanna talk to my mother about it first, if it’s okay?”

“Sounds good! Really good! Uh, I’ll see you then-… Ah, wait, we’re-…”, he gestured over to the bakery, obviously embarrassed to have immediately forgotten she wanted to get rid of a bit of stuff over his nervousness, “And, uh, we still have school, right? Haha, you’re in my class, so I’ll still see you here, uuh-… Nevermind, I’ll just-… Uh, we can just-… Yeah, what I meant, yeah…”

He laughed and shrugged as she grinned at him with an amused twinkle in her eyes, then he turned to continue walking. Marinette giggled and followed him a little faster to walk at the same height with him again.

“So, we’ll be driven to your house by your driver, right?”

He nodded, humming.

“Uhm, yeah. I-If that’s okay with you.”

She quickly agreed to this, actually glad that she wouldn’t have to walk. Not that she wasn’t fit enough but she just didn’t want to see the stares on the streets after already feeling so much better.

Only a bit later, when she already sat in class next to Alya again, thoughtfully staring at the back of Adrien’s blonde head, she realized that it sounded an awful lot as if Adrien had just asked her out on a date.


	41. Chapter 41

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The tables have turned and the fluff ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally it's fluff again. Finallyyyyyyyyy!  
> Also, what's out there that cocoa couldn't fix? :D Or, well, for people who don't like cocoa at least warm drinks like tea or coffee.  
> Hope you enjoy~

Marinette held her hands under the warm stream of water, Alya imitating her just a few seconds later. The girls giggled and bumped their hips against each other as they jokingly fought for room on the sink, Alya having deliberately picked the same sink Marinette had chosen.

They both laughed and the bluenette even flicked a few drops of water up to her best friend, which finally gave her the superior position and thus she was done faster. She leant against another sink, her giggle fading to a small smile and finally falling from her lips as Alya was still busy drying her face and hands.

“So-… But what if it is a date?”, the smaller girl asked for what had to be the thousand’s time, “I mean-… What would I say? I dunno if I’m even ready for friends yet and then…”

She trailed off with a slight frown but Alya put her – by now dried – hands on her shoulders and lightly brushed over the fabric of her jacket.

“Then you don’t have to do anything, Adrien knows that. If you’re not ready he won’t do anything to make it even harder for you.”, she explained but Marinette shrugged, looking away.

“I just-… I neither wanna disappoint him, especially not after having pined after him for so long before, nor do I wanna nail myself down on something. I-… I kinda need the-… The freedom to-…”, she sniffled and Alya quickly lifted her hands off her shoulders, offering a hug. Marinette gratefully took the invitation and snuggled up against her shoulder, “… I just don’t wanna regret it, I guess…”

Alya sighed and shook her head, brushing over Marinette’s open hair.

“Y’know… I was kinda afraid to get together with Nino as well… You know how I am, always on the run, never really slowing down, life for the blog.”, Marinette nodded, listening closely, “And-… I was-… I _am_ afraid I’ll disappoint him. Like, I’ll just-… Continue being me and running after Akumas. What if he’s gonna dump me after a month because I’m really an egoistic asshole, caring about nothing but her passion?”

“Alya, that’s not-”, Marinette tried to interrupt but Alya just shook her head.

“I know I’m not. Know why?”

Her friend had grown still in her arms again, then she slowly made a questioning sound.

“… Why?”

Alya grinned, leaning away so she could cup Marinette’s face with one hand and look into her eyes.

“Because I don’t have to stop being myself. I’ll still run after Akumas and I know it’ll upset Nino. But know what’s more important?”, she gave Marinette a soft smile as she pictured Nino, waiting outside with Adrien for the girls to come back from the toilet, “… He’s one of my passions. I don’t have to suppress one passion, my blog, for the other, him. In fact, I shouldn’t, should never have to. And he knows that. He won’t stop being a DJ just because he has the feeling that he needs to spend all the time he has with me.”

Marinette slowly nodded, furrowing her eyebrows.

“Oh, okay…”

“Yeah, I mean, of course we’re still standing at the beginning of our relationship. And yeah, I’m still scared he might just say I should get lost someday. But he has the same fear that I’ll do it to him. And if we continue to balance each other out and be there for the other when we need each other – or if we need to have a bit of distance – then we’ll manage. We have to adjust to each other, sure, but that doesn’t mean we’ll have to limit ourselves in something. He’ll continue being a DJ and I’ll continue being a reporter. The only difference is that we now have each other.”

The bluenette nuzzled her nose into Alya’s shoulder and sighed.

“Yeah, but-… There’s still the Ladybug problem… How do I tell him? I mean, how do I keep it a secret? No, I-…”, she groaned, “I just dunno what to do with all that magical stuff…”

Alya had to suppress a grin at that, instead looking up to the ceiling to catch herself again.

“Well, I think it’ll sort itself out on another day. First and foremost is to find out whether or not Adrien asked you out to an actual date.”, with a very knowing grin because oh, she knew for a fact that it was a date, she mimicked holding an imaginary microphone under Mari’s nose, or at least where she assumed her nose to be. She hit her chin instead, “So what do you think, Ms. Dupain-Cheng, what is going on?”

Marinette heartily laughed at Alya’s mocking reporter-mode and shook her head, turning to her other shoulder. Alya joined into her laughter, hugging her tightly.

They laughed until the last giggle had subsided, ending in a calming silence between the two friends. Alya brushed away the tears of laughter and buried her nose in her best friend’s hair.

“I missed that.”

They held each other closer and Marinette smiled.

“I missed you.”

Alya broke the embrace after a few moments, putting her hands on her best friend’s shoulders.

“And now, relax, girl. Adrien’s a nice guy and you are an amazing girl. You just have to see you won’t be trapped or held there at any moment. Adrien is safe to be with and hey, one single letter over text and I’ll immediately run there, get in and break every single bone in his body. Deal?”

“I don’t think you should do that…”, Marinette replied with an amused twinkle in her eyes, “Plus, you wouldn’t do that.”

“We’ll see about that.”

Alya smirked and Marinette rolled her eyes.

“Oh my gooooood, Alyaaaa.”

“Go on, get out there. And I guarantee you, Adrien’s laid an eye on you! So go and get him, girl, it can only be awesome!”

The bluenette just laughed it off and shook her head, following Alya out of the bathroom to meet the boys who were waiting for them. Alya immediately leant against Nino, exchanging a kiss with him, not really giving Adrien and Marinette a choice. They looked at each other and much to her surprise he began blushing a bit. _Seems familiar_ … She smirked.

“… Ready to go?”, he finally managed, sounding a little out of breath to her.

“Mhm!”

Nodding, she briefly touched Alya’s shoulder to momentarily snap her out of being lost in Nino’s eyes, waving as she already walked past them.

“Bye Nino, bye Alya! See you tomorrow!”

Her best friend waved after them as well, even though it was probably about half as enthusiastic as Marinette’s wave. She was, after all, a bit skeptical regarding her health and letting her out of her eyes. And, well, she was a little busy with Nino, that was probably a factor as well.

She followed Adrien down the stairs to his car that would bring them to his home. A quick glance towards her own home confirmed that her mother stood on the window. She giggled, lightly waving her mother before turning back to Adrien. He held the car door open for her but didn’t smile, instead he had followed her gaze up to her mother.

“Y-You know-… If you’re not comfortable with this you don’t have to-”

She quickly placed a hand on his shoulder and smiled for him.

“I’m looking forward to spending the day with you, Adrien. Don’t worry.”

He let himself be infected by her grin and mimicked a bow, gesturing towards the door.

“Then please step in, pri-”, he gulped the rest of his sentence down, partly because of the nickname that he couldn’t, shouldn’t say but also because of the breeze of her perfume that washed over his conscious. His grin turned dopey as he climbed in after her.

“What did you wanna say?”, she asked, a little skeptical but mostly curious.

“Uh, uhm-… Precious? ‘Cuz-… You are?”, he blushed deeply as his driver began heading home, “Uhm… Sorry.”

She merely giggled but left it at that, falling in a comfortable silence – at least for her. He fiddled with his shirt, his palms sweaty and his heart fluttering. What to say, what to say?

Did she wanna talk at all? Did she wanna be here at all? Did he do something wrong? She was so silent… Was this okay?

While she was rather comfortable with the soft seat, the gentle thrumming of the motor and even felt a little sleepy after a short while he probably had the most anxious drive home in his life.

When the limo finally pulled up at his house he practically fell out of the car, receiving an adorable giggle from behind him. He held open the door for her and offered his hand for her to make it easier, suddenly realizing how he acted. Wait-… Did she-…

She said she would like to hang out with him. No, no, she said she would like to _spend the day_ with him! Did she-… Maybe not know he-… Saw this as a date?

His skin burned as she took hold of his hand, letting herself be helped out of the car. A small smile, a twinkle in her eyes, and he knew he had fallen once again.

“Thanks, Adrien!”

She nodded and climbed up the stairs as he ran past her, reaching the doors before her again. He didn’t miss the tiny amused roll of her eyes as he opened them for her as well, mockingly stretching out his hand.

“After you, pri-… Uuh, Marinette!”

Marinette grinned and took his hand, getting led in by him. As the door closed behind her she lightly gasped, taking in the view of the entrance hall. It sure was big, she had forgotten that. Well, of course she had been here as Ladybug already but she had been focused on fighting and very grateful for all the room. But now that she stood here in her civilian form, no adrenaline from an upcoming fight, no fear for Adrien, and she finally had the chance to take it in.

The bluenette walked up the stairs with him still holding her hand and sent out a silent ‘thanks’ that her hand was dry.

“It looks, uhm-…”

“Cold?”

“Big.”, she corrected him.

They reached his room and as he shoved open the doors, she was slightly more collected. After all she had been a few times more in his room before and her hand slipped out of his, about which Adrien looked a bit disappointed.

“Now that’s a room I would wanna live in.”, she tried but he merely shrugged.

“I dunno, I think I’d prefer your room…”, he mumbled under his breath.

Marinette spun in a pirouette and took in everything of Adrien’s room. There was a big bed and four screens on his desk. She even noticed a halfpipe and a climbing wall and a second floor with whole rows of books. Of course, she had been in here as Ladybug once, even twice, but she had been occupied with other things and additionally, she had never really been here as Marinette despite getting closer to him in the last year, so she had to act like it. It wasn’t that hard though, because her excitement was genuine.

“That’s just so cool! Your room is really nice!”

“Never took you for someone to be impressed by this.”, he grinned. She laughed and faced him again, seeing that he took two cocoa cups from his desk and held one out to her.

“I just think you can’t be bored with all this stuff.”, she raised an eyebrow and smiled at him, taking the cup, “Thanks.”

“Without friends it gets boring pretty quickly, actually. Nobody to share it with.”, they both smiled and she took a sip.

“Wow, the cocoa is amazing! It tastes really good!”

Adrien gestured to the couch facing the huge glass wall of his room and they both sat down.

“I tried finding a good recipe to challenge your mother, although I admit my personal chef does have a bit more experience… I’ll tell him it’s good, then.”

She took another sip.

“Thanks again.”

He blushed and for yet another time she noticed. Did he really like her a bit? Did Alya not just see things? Maybe it was the hot cocoa?

He nodded, looking out the window. They shared a comfortable moment of silence in which they both just enjoyed their drinks.

“So-…”, he finally spoke up, setting aside his cup, “I’ve been meaning to ask you something.”

Her head shot up and she eyed him.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, about-… About your time before, well…”

“Oh, yeah.”, she looked into her cup once again, “Actually, I don’t really wanna talk about it.”

“Just one question, please?”, she couldn’t say no to his pleading eyes. With a light sigh she nodded, hiding a bit in the steam of her cocoa. Or, well, at least trying to.

“Okay. Shoot it.”

“You told me, that you knew what had happened as you were Miss Fortune-… How do you know? I’ve heard from Nino that he doesn’t remember anything about his time as the Bubbler. So how do you remember?”

Marinette gulped.

“Well-…”

“You don’t have to answer, of course! Just-… I’m just curious.”

“No, it’s alright. I don’t know, for some reason-… Hawkmoth wanted me to watch? Probably because he wanted me to see myself strangling my best friend? I really don’t know…”

Of course it was a lie and Marinette hated lying to Adrien, but he couldn’t know that Hawkmoth wanted her to watch because she was Ladybug. Adrien didn’t know. She asked herself if it was appropriate to reveal to him, after all he was a friend of hers, just like Alya and Nino. But she quickly discarded that. She couldn’t reveal to him. It was enough that Nino and Alya knew.

“Oh, okay-… I’m sorry, I just-… I had to ask.”

She smiled, brushing it off.

“It’s alright. Everyone’s curious.”

He sheepishly looked to the floor, grinning like an idiot.

“Heh, well okay then-…”, he picked up his cup of cocoa again and gulped it down. She laughed because he had spilled a bit on his white jacket.

“Uh, Adrien? You-… You spilled a bit. Right there-…”, she moved closer and showed him on his white jacket, where the cocoa had dyed the white fabric brown. He looked up and she noticed their faces were really close, suddenly. She blushed, as did he, and before she could process anything, he leant in. She was tempted to do so, too, but quickly pulled away, assuming it was maybe too fast.

“Uh, maybe you should get it off before it seeps through onto your shirt?”, she nervously asked, blushing furiously.

He sheepishly nodded, getting up and pulled off the jacket. A breeze of his perfume brushed over her face and she couldn’t quite hide the smile that sneaked on her lips. He walked to his desk and draped it on his chair, quickly returning to her.

“Yeah, uh, thanks…”

She was still trying to fight her blush down but put on a more normal smile.

“Uh, yeah, no problem.”

They said nothing for a few moments, until Adrien had an idea.

“Hey, you wanna eat something? I bet you hadn’t had anything for dinner yet!”

Right on point, her stomach growled, being the traitor it was.

“That’d be great, thank you.”

“Follow me.”, he winked, helping her to get up.


	42. Chapter 42

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One way to a man's heart is through his stomach.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More fluff!  
> And, well, cooking. 'Cuz I'm a little bit of a sucker for these two and cooking or baking something. Especially when a romance is blooming ;)  
> Hope you'll enjoy just as much as me!  
> Oh, and btw, I started participating in the Christmas Drabble Prompts! If you want a ship on a certain day, just hit me up here on Ao3, on FanFiction.net or on tumblr and I'll write it for you!  
> But for now, enjoy~

“Ah, uh, here we are.“, Adrien smiled, leading her into the kitchen.

She nodded, closing the door behind him again.

“My chef’s away for this evening. So, we’ve got the kitchen all for ourselves!”

Marinette laughed, making him blush.

“So, what do we do? What will we cook?”

“Err-… Uh-… I thought we could maybe-…”, Adrien trailed off, rubbing the back of his head. The bluenette just grinned, aiming for the fridge.

“You haven’t thought about that, haven’t you?”

“… Nouh…”, he admitted, “Do you have an idea what we could make?”

She rummaged through the giant fridge, already having a plan of what they could do. She had already found tomatoes and onions, a light feeling of amusement flashing through her as she saw Adrien standing around relatively helplessly.

“I thought, maybe… Some noodles, Spaghetti for example? And tomato sauce?”

“Spaghetti Napoli?”, Adrien grinned, relieved that he at least knew the name of the recipe, “Sounds good! I love it!”

She shot him a quick smirk and nodded before closing the fridge, now searching for spices.

“Do you know where your chef keeps the spices like salt, pepper, dried oregano…?”

“Oh, yeah, right here!”, he almost stumbled showing her the cupboard where she found several professional looking boxes, each tagged with the name of its content.

“Thanks. You can get the noodles, if you want to. Spaghetti is alright? Oh and we need some tomatoes in a can, too.”

“O-Of course! I’ll be right back!”

He ran to another door that lead to the store room, she assumed. For having no idea of cooking, he at least knew where to find all the ingredients. Marinette giggled as she heard a little thump out of the small room next to the kitchen.

“I’m okay!”, he called, laughing as she did.

“Alright!”, the bluenette shook her head grinning and pulled out her phone to text Alya. Her best friend surely was impatiently waiting for deets.

 

**Marinette:** Hey Alya, everything’s going alright!

 

**Alya:** Don’t be so vague, girl! Tell meeeyyy!!

 

She laughed a bit to herself as her phone instantly blinked with a message from Alya. She really must be curious about what was happening with Adrien and her.

 

**Marinette:** Later!

 

**Alya:** Nooooooooooouuuuuuuuh!

 

Shaking her head once more, she pushed the phone back into her pocket, remembering herself to put it back into her bag in Adrien’s room anytime later.

“Found them!”, Adrien closed the door to the store room and waved with a blue package of Spaghetti and a can of tomatoes, beaming at her.

“Perfect. Now, let’s go over this again… We have the vegetables, the noodles, spices, oil-… Yup, we got everything! We can start cooking.”, she smiled at him and he nodded, finally losing some of his nervousness. She wondered why he was, but what Alya had said was stuck in her mind. Did he really feel something for her? She couldn’t be sure… He could also just be nervous because he wanted to try to make her trust him. Which she did, no question! Still…

She shrugged it off, not wanting to further think about it, and began to search for knives.

She found a small one and her gaze lingered on it for just a second too long, for Adrien’s taste. A second later, she still stared at it. Her hand began trembling and he saw fear in her eyes, her gaze flickering from the knife to the bandages around her lower arms, hidden under her dark jacket on which she had pulled the sleeves down. With a swift movement, he was behind her, cupping the hand that held the knife with his.

“I’ll take that, Mari. What needs to be, uh, done?”

She gratefully smiled up to him and quickly let go of the knife as if she had burned herself, backing away and subtly brushing over her eyes.

“Uh, yeah… The onions need to be, uh, diced and the tomatoes too. I’ll take care of, erm, the noodles.”

He nodded, getting himself a cutting board and began with the onions. Because he looked a bit lost, she came over to him, showing him how he had to peel the onion and how to cut it so that dices would be the result. He nodded again so she put out two pots from under the stove, filling the bigger one with water. He interestedly watched as she stuck out her tongue while balancing the filled pot back to the stove, already letting the water heat up. She put in a good swipe of salt and he instantly loved watching her cook, her clumsiness being replaced with an elegance he had never really seen on her. Or never noticed.

Too bad his eyes began to water not so long after.

Marinette seemed to notice he sniffed and began to grin. He had absolutely no idea why she would find funny that he suddenly had started crying.

“Is onion cutting too much for you?”, she teased.

“I have absolutely no idea why this is happening, Marinette, I swear I didn’t start c-crying because-…”, his chin quivered and he brushed away tears from his eyes, only to increase the burning. To his surprise, she started laughing, shaking her head, and walked over to him.

“Adrien, don’t touch your eyes even more. And lean back a bit. It’s the onions, they sting and make your eyes water and your nose all runny.”

He did as she instructed but that still didn’t stop the tears from rolling down his cheeks. She laughed and attempted to take the knife from him, but he held it up and out of her reach.

“N-No way!”, he sobbed through a little, brave smile, “I’m finishing this! I won’t make you uncomfortable-…”

“Oh come on, gimme the knife, you big baby!”, she giggled, holding out a demanding hand.

He hesitated.

“You need to rinse your eyes with water, Adrien, now gimme the knife. I have to get used to working with them again anyways so why not start now?”

He brushed over his eyes with the sleeve of his shirt, slightly soothing the stinging in his watery eyes.

“No.”, he pressed out, like a stubborn child not wanting to go to bed yet.

She rolled her eyes and instead threatened to open the drawer again to get another knife. He pouted and she smiled.

“C’mon, Adrien. I can handle it. Now give me that thing.”

Slowly, he lowered his arm and handed over the little knife. She briefly flinched but still smiled, reassurance laying in her bluebell eyes. He remained next to her, closely watching every movement that she did with this-… This _thing_.

She seemed to notice and waved with her other hand in his direction, lightly brushing over his chest because he still stood so close.

“The faster you rinse your eyes the faster you’ll be able to get that knife back, y’know?”

He was almost sure he heard a little shaking undertone to her voice, as if she wished he would be quick to return.

Instantly, he bolted for the sink, eager to rinse his eyes and take the bad thing away from Marinette. He heard her giggling as he practically drowned himself in the sink, wanting to get back to her as fast as possible. After a few moments of soaking his shirt and hair rather than rinsing his eyes, he trotted back to her, shaking his head like a dog. She gasped and cried out as he sprinkled her with drops from his hair. He grinned and as soon as the dizziness faded, he shook his head again, leaving her just as soaked as he was. She laughed and he joined in, snatching the knife out of her hand. She didn’t bridle but instead gave it to him willingly, almost as if she really was afraid of it. He just laid it aside though, to rub his hair on her neck, soaking her collar in the process.

They laughed and Marinette ran back to the sink, only to turn on the water, wet her hands and sprinkle Adrien in his already soaked face. He grinned and took her spot on the sink, filling water in his cupped hands to throw it at her, hitting her jeans. She shrieked and once again held her hand under the water, only to freeze as they heard sizzling.

“The water!”, she shouted. He turned and saw the boiling water jumping over the edge of the pot. Quickly, she slipped over a glove to pull the pot away from the heated-up cooking plate, reducing the temperature.

She faced Adrien again, a grin playing around her lips.

“Did I-… Is something wrong now? Do we have to start all over?”

“We weren’t that far along, so it’s okay. And over boiling water is not that bad, it just makes a bit of a mess. Now go back to dicing, _scullion_!”, he laughed at her attempted insult and took the knife back into his hands to continue killing the onion. This time he leaned back and concentrated on not touching his face anymore and this time, it really helped. He finished the onion and she grinned as she stole the cutting board from him, shoving the onion dices into the smaller pot, roasting them gently in olive oil.

She gave him back his cutting board and then showed him how to cut the tomatoes. He apparently was a fast learner because soon, she returned to the Spaghetti to stir them so they wouldn’t stick to each other.

He found it mesmerizing watching her move, watching her preparing the ingredients to throw them all in one pot so they would get a meal out of it. He had always admired people who could cook so naturally, his eyes weren’t focusing on his own job. Suddenly, a stinging pain shot through his finger and he instantly put it in his mouth after realizing he had accidently cut himself, in order for Marinette to not see his cut.

He tasted blood and sucked a bit on it, always keeping an eye on the bluenette, praying she wouldn’t look over at the moment. Luckily, she didn’t seem to notice.

It wasn’t even a big cut or that painful. It just bled like there was no tomorrow and he cursed himself for instead watching the girl working. He then proceeded to cut the tomato into pieces but he constantly had to put his finger back into his mouth, because this damn cut wouldn’t stop bleeding.

Eventually, she had to look after him. And obviously, it had to be when he didn’t have his finger in his mouth.

“Oh my god, Adrien, you cut yourself! Why didn’t you say anything?”

He looked to the ground sheepishly, letting her take his hand into her gentle fingers, inspecting the cut.

“I didn’t want you to worry-…”, he murmured and she rolled her eyes.

“Luckily, I have a few patches with me, because I know myself too well. Wait here, I’m going to get them from my bag. Don’t-… Move.”

He nodded, saluting with his unharmed hand.

“Yes, ma’am.”

She giggled, despite probably being worried and angry at him.

A few moments later, she returned, the hair slightly brushed back. He still saw the worry in her eyes as well as a bit of fear.

“Damn knives. Damn these things.”, she mumbled.

“I’m glad.”, he suddenly blurted out.

She looked up, surprised by his choice of words.

“That it isn’t that deep? Yeah, I’m glad too because-…”

“That’s not what I meant.”, he smiled and laid his other hand above hers, “I’m glad that you think this way about knives. I don’t-… I don’t want you hurt again.”

Hey eyes were wide open and her lips parted, as if she still wanted to say something. His gaze flickered down to her lips and he had to hold himself back not to lean down to her just like that.

He, as Adrien, wasn’t allowed to do that. He couldn’t just kiss her, out of the blue. He had been raised to be reserved and polite as Adrien, he had to be perfect. Just kissing a girl who he knew had been through so much in the past months and was still adjusting to friendship was not being perfect. So he just smiled and rubbed over the patch on his finger.

“Thanks, Mari.”

She nodded too, a little blush creeping up in her cheeks. Behind them, a sizzling became loud again and they both rolled their eyes. The water was boiling over again.

“I’m always setting the heat too high!”, Marinette complained and rushed over to the stove to set the heat down again and calm the boiling water. Adrien smirked, carrying over the diced tomatoes to her. He laid a hand on her shoulder, reassuring her.

“It’s alright. At least you know how to cook after all.”

She laughed and took the tomatoes from him, shoving them into the smaller pot to the onions. She opened the tomato can and put that in there too, then she poured in some water, salt, pepper and dried oregano and let it cook a bit. While the heat did its work, she looked for an immersion blender, mashing the tomatoes in the pot.

After a few moments, she hung a sieve over the sink, decanting the water of the Spaghetti through the sieve and caught the noodles inside. She put the pot back on the now turned off stove, hanging the sieve inside the pot. The sauce was already finished too.

She had worked so quickly he’d had a hard time following her movements. And he almost didn’t notice her putting a few basil leaves in his collar, making him flinch because the leaves tickled his back.

“Get them out! Hahaha, get them out, waah!”, he hopped around in the kitchen and she couldn’t contain her laughter as he frantically pulled his shirt up and down, eager, to get the leaves out.

But within a few minutes, there were suddenly two plates full with Spaghetti and sauce, decorated with basil, that had not been inside his shirt, on top. He was amazed.

“ _Voilà_.”, she grinned, holding the two plates in her hands, “Where do we eat?”

Adrien shook his head, trying to snap out of it.

“Uh, ah, uh, right. Wait, I’m going to get us something to drink and then, we’ll, uh-… Right.”

She laughed as he got two glasses and a bottle of water with him, leading her to the great dining room. She looked at the big portrait that showed his father, his mother and himself. He knew he looked happy, because _she_ had still been there.

They settled down at the end of the table, across the corner to be closer to each other.

“Bon appétit, Adrien.”

He smiled back, lifting his fork.

“Bon appétit, Mari.”

It was neither special nor expensive. But Adrien loved it like nothing else in the world. After all, it had been cooked by the most amazing girl in the world.

“Mari, it’s fantastic!”, he beamed at her, “Really, it’s sooo good!”

She laughed, gesturing to her own cheek to signalize him he had a bit of tomato sauce hanging there. Laughing, he swiped it off, happily chewing yet another forkful.

“Well, it’s nothing big, it’s just a basic meal, so-…”

“It’s not basic when it’s made by you!”, Adrien protested, not caring that his Chat was showing. She was suspicious for just one second before the smile found its way back onto her face.

“Thanks!”, she grinned.

They were quiet for a few moments, both enjoying their dinner and emptying their plates, as Adrien noticed a little drop of tomato sauce hanging on her cheek this time. But instead of showing her on his own cheek, he leaned in and brushed it off, without warning her. She just stared at him, a blush increasing in darkness as he licked his finger, humming at the taste of the delicious sauce. He then looked at her, concerned.

Inside, he smirked as he laid a hand on her forehead, feeling her temperature, deepening her blush even more.

“Are you having a fever?”, he innocently asked. Her gaze glued back on her empty plate, her face blushing in a dark red by now.

“No-…”, she tried but he already broke in laughter.

Suddenly, he felt something wet on his face and looked over to her, surprised to find she had sauce on her finger and had obviously smeared it on his face. She began to giggle as a grin slowly made its way onto his face. Smugly, she laid a hand on his forehead.

“You’re so red, do you have temperature?”

“Oh, so we’re playing _this_ game now?”, he laughed, getting a finger full of sauce and smeared it on her cheek too.

Within seconds, their faces were completely covered in tomato sauce. They both giggled like idiots when Nathalie came checking on them and saw them rolling around on the floor, sauce all over their faces. According to her expression, she had first feared it was blood but she had quickly realized it had been their food, because of the plates that were still on the table.

She had just rolled her eyes and returned to her work, leaving them both hysterically laughing on the floor until the need to breathe became too urgent. After their fit of laughter, Adrien got up first, collecting their dishes and bringing them into the kitchen. When he came back, Marinette still laid on the floor.  
“Hey, don’t you wanna get up?”, he asked.

“Nah. It’s comfy here.”, she replied, not moving a muscle. He shrugged and laid down beside her, staring on the ceiling instead of her. He figured that would make him look less like a creep.

“You really don’t know how to cook?”, she asked, curiosity swinging in her voice.

“No. When Maman still was here I would watch her cooking, though. She loved it, cooking, letting me do some ridiculous chores like eating a noodle to test if they were good yet and so on… But I don’t really do it on my own. My father-… He isn’t really fond of-… He once called it ‘wasting his time’. And when you have personal chefs, cooking takes a back seat in one’s life.”

She nodded, fishing after his hand.

“I hope you had fun, then.”

He found her eyes and caught them, blue on green.

“I did. Thank you, Mari. Maybe, we could-… Cook more often together?”

She smiled softly, squeezing his hand a bit.

“Of course.”, they both grinned as they noticed they had still tomato sauce all over their faces, “But maybe we should finally wash our faces, hm?”


	43. Chapter 43

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You didn’t.”, she softly said, “I promise. Nobody did.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's starting, my guys >:)  
> Enjoy~

He stood and hoisted her up with their still locked hands, leading her to the bathroom. It ended in a fight with water again, leaving them not as soaked as they had been in the kitchen, but still.

They openly joked around and finally, the tensed mood between the two vanished.

He even became a bit flirty, which Marinette found very enjoyable. Finally, she met the sassy, funny side of Adrien and he didn’t have to be a perfectly raised model anymore.

Running, they emerged the bathroom and as they returned to his room, he caught her and attempted to tickle her. She immediately started laughing as soon as his hands went up and down her sides, tickling her to no end.

“Adrien, Adrien stop!! Haha, oh god, stop it!”, she giggled as he lifted her up and threw her on his bed, continuing to tickle her as she laid down.

“Never! I’m gonna tickle you until you’ll give up! That’s the revenge for putting basil leaves into my collar earlier!”

Turns out she gave up pretty quickly. As soon as he saw her eyes getting all glassy, he gasped and sat back, letting her breathe again. She spread out on his bed and smiled, breathing heavily.

“That was-… Exhausting-… But fun-… Thank you! I haven’t laughed that much in a very long time.”

He laid down next to her, still laughing a bit.

“My-… My pleasure, Marinette.”

They both waited until their breaths calmed down. Then, Adrien propped himself up on one elbow and looked at Marinette, at her flushed cheeks and her rosy lips and-… _Oh dear god._

“You okay?”, he asked, already kinda regretting he had tickled her so intensively. She merely grinned, shrugging as she looked back at him.

“Yeah, I’m good. It was really fun. You?”

He looked up to his ceiling again, his hand inching over his sheets until his fingers brushed over hers.

“I don’t wanna hurt you.”, he mumbled, admitting what had shifted his mood. She sat up and turned to him, taking his hand fully to play with his fingers.

“You didn’t hurt me, Adrien. You could never.”

This sentence brought tears to his eyes as he sat up as well. He had hurt her. As Adrien. _Especially_ as Chat Noir.

“But-… But I did…”, he sniffled, watching her place his index over his middle finger, softly braiding in his ring finger as well before opening it again and going over to his pinky, bending it. It was soothing to have her so fascinated by this, to have her playing with his hand like this while sitting so close he could feel the breeze of her breath on his shoulder. While trusting him so deeply to stay.

“You didn’t.”, she softly said, “I promise. Nobody did.”

He looked down at her busy fingers again, watching as she turned over his hand, forming a loose fist before straightening his index again, then his middle finger and went on like this.

“But-… But you were in such a bad condition. Chat Noir-… H-He hurt you so bad…”

Instantly, his hand flinched as the tip of her thumb brushed over his ring. He had been ready to kill her… He had almost beat her to death. Suddenly, her touch felt like fire on his skin.

“No, he didn’t.”, she almost whispered now, watching as she softly pulled on his ring finger. As if she could feel his guilt she shifted closer, now resting her forehead on his shoulder, keeping her gaze on their laps where her hands cupped his, “He didn’t hurt me, Adrien. All he did was perfectly normal, he was hurting. It’s really not a big deal.”

By now his chest heaved up and down and his eyes were filling up with tears.

“N-Not a big deal?”, he asked, willing himself to stay calm and instead bury his nose in her hair. It smelled like Vanilla, as he had suspected, “He-… He beat you… He kicked you, Marinette, he-…”

“Don’t you think Ladybug would’ve reacted the same if someone had told her Chat Noir was dead?”, she quietly asked and he stilled, “Don’t you think Ladybug would’ve raged the same, would’ve judged the same and would’ve done the same mistakes as Chat?”

He didn’t have an answer to that. Well, of course he would’ve liked to believe that she wouldn’t have done the same, that she would’ve helped the citizen stand up and brushed the dust off and had forgiven them instantly. But he knew her, in and out. As forgiving as she was with other akumatized victims, as merciful as she had always greeted a confused, poor victim just detransforming, he knew her fierce side. When an Akuma went too far, no, when _Hawkmoth_ went too far, she never engaged in jokes or banter anymore. When someone was in danger, she was quick and reckless until it was over, until the victim was freed again. He honestly wasn’t sure how she would’ve reacted if someone told her they had killed Chat Noir.

As much as he liked to believe she would’ve acted differently than him, he simply didn’t know.

“… Knew it…”, Marinette said after a while, no smugness or mocking in her voice. She was stating a fact.

“But-… But I-”

She sighed and nudged his collar bone with her nose before settling with her forehead on his shoulder again, turning it a little to snuggle up to the crook of his neck.

“Nobody hurt me, Adrien. Alya, Nino, my parents, our class, Chat Noir, you-… All of you are beating yourselves up for abandoning me, for ignoring me, for-… For blaming me, but you guys are not to blame. You did what you felt was right, you just acted like normal human beings. That’s all. I would’ve acted the same.”

He sniffled, his other hand now slowly finding its way to her shoulder, gently holding her close.

“Then-… Then why didn’t you?”

She hesitated. Even started to tremble a bit. He already feared that he had said something very, very wrong as she spoke up again, her voice weak and thin but steady nonetheless.

“Because I gave in to Hawkmoth. I gave in to weakness and I-… I gave up. I should’ve never, ever given up. Never. It’s-… I made a mistake, a big, big mistake and I-… Well, I deserved everything I got. Because I failed, I failed Chat Noir and I failed Paris and-… And-…”

Finally, her dams broke and she sniffled. Slowly at first, silently, but soon she cried into his shoulder, searching for his comfort. He felt her hands stilling on his and her chest shaking so he held her, held her without trying to soothe her, calm her or look at her. He knew she’d be uncomfortable with him trying to make her feel better. And sometimes-… Sometimes it just had to break out. Sometimes, people just needed to cry.

Since they weren’t really in the most comfortable position he softly pulled his hand out of hers, placing it on her waist and started lowering himself down on the sheets. They ended up with her on top of him, her face still buried on his shoulder. He leant against the headrest, still keeping his nose in her hair as he let her settle between his legs, just hugging her close.

“… It’s alright… It’s okay…”, he mumbled, letting her soak his shirt. He faintly asked himself why she thought she failed Chat Noir and Paris but he let this take a backseat, making her well-being his first priority, “… You’re okay, you’re safe… I got you… I’m here for you… Don’t be embarrassed, I won’t tell anyone… Just let it out, I’m here…”

After roughly half an hour her hoarse sobs became slower and quieted down. Her body slumped a little and he held her tightly, reassuring her that he was here for her, that she didn’t need to run. That he didn’t want her to run. When the noises from her finally completely subsided, he brushed over her back, softly nudging her temple with his nose.

“… Are you feeling better?”

She slowly nodded, a few lost sobs still sounding but her tears having dried.

“Good…”, he remarked, then stretched to take the remote from his night stand, “We don’t need to talk about anything. Wanna calm down and watch a bit TV? We can stay just here, I can tilt the TV so we can see it. A documentary?”

Much to his surprise she actually giggled, shifting to the side so she could stay snuggled up to him but still see the screen.

“Yes, I wanna watch a documentary. Also, you’re a rich kid.”

He chuckled, shrugging as a small electronic noise filled the room as the screen turned to them.

“Yeah, I guess I am… Documentary about some nature studies sound good?”, he suggested and she nodded against his chest, avoiding the wet spot she had created on his shirt.

“Mhm…”, she hummed, “But you maybe wanna change your shirt. I’m sorry I ruined it.”

He shook his head, smiling down at her.

“Don’t worry about it. Also, risk moving? Nu-uh.”

She laughed, lightly slapping his chest and shaking her head.

“Change your shirt, Adrien. I won’t run anywhere.”

He did so as fast as he could after she leant back. Just a few second later he returned to lay down in their former position again, the documentary about some mountains already having started.

“Better like this?”, he asked and she nodded contently, snuggling back against him.

“Mhm… Better…”

 

* * *

 

Admittedly, he almost fell asleep like this. The girl he liked cuddling with him, his body heavy on the sheets and the soothing voice of the narrator quietly telling them about weather conditions in some mountains. He felt her breathing slower and deeper as well but didn’t dare moving too much to check if her eyes were closed in case she really was about to fall asleep.

Yet, when the documentary came to an end and the names of the people realizing this project rolled over the screen se began stretching, ripping him out of a trance-like state.

She rolled on her back and he turned his head to watch her, his sleepy mind not even processing anything besides how soft her skin looked, how rosy her cheeks were, how adorable her freckles looked and how cute it looked that she got an imprint of a fold of his shirt on her cheek.

He smiled as she relaxed from stretching again, opening her bluebell eyes to meet his and-

“Can I kiss you?”

He didn’t even think about it. He just-… Blurted it out.

Her face went red in a blink of an eye.

“Uh-…”, she forced out, just looking at him. He blushed as well, bringing his other hand up to his mouth.

“Oh my gosh, I am so sorry! I didn’t mean to-… I thought I-… And you-… Uh, I shouldn’t have-… I am really sorry, Marinette, I-…”

She still just looked at him, not giving him any sign of how she thought about kissing him, her face equally red as a tomato. He blabbered on but a movement caught his attention. She had nodded.

_She had nodded!_

His voice died. His mouth went dry. His hands were trembling.

She still looked at him with big eyes.

Ever so slowly, he bent down and saw how her eyes closed. He felt her hot breath in a breeze on his chin and the craving feeling of finally, please, finally touch her increased at least ten times. Being perfect, for the sake of his father’s reputation, and not kissing a girl out of the blue, was long forgotten.

His own eyes fluttered close and her breaths fastened as their lips met in a light brush. He held himself up next to her head and his waist was right next to hers. He felt every inch of his body burning with the desire to show her that he would keep her safe, that he would make everything alright again, that he wanted to take the chance to make her feel better.

They parted way too quickly for both tastes. But Adrien knew that no matter how much they still wanted to kiss each other, they were moving too fast.

Or, well, he didn’t want to overwhelm her. He didn’t want to scare her. Because he knew, while they would both smile after this, in the evening they’d simultaneously freak out. And even if he didn’t acre right now, he had to be considerate of her feelings. So, he leant back and grinned down at her. She apparently felt the same as him because he saw the same shadow of disappointment flicking over her face before making room for the stupid grin he wore as well.

“Uh, so…”

“That was nice.”, she smiled, and he barely managed to nod.

“Uhm-… Mhm! It, uhm-… It was!”

She smiled up at him and he felt his heart soaring. Ladybug, Chat Noir, their friends and everyone else was long forgotten. This moment belonged to them and only them.

 

* * *

 

They somehow managed not to make it any more awkward than it briefly had been.

So they had spent the rest of the afternoon playing a few games, laughing and generally just relaxing, almost already forgetting the kiss they had shared. When it was time for Marinette to go home, though, it hit Adrien again as she smiled as her gaze going up to meet his, blushing a bit.

“I-I’ll walk you to the door!”, he offered. She giggled and let him go first, grabbing her stuff as she followed him.

Adrien grinned and led her out, one of his hands now resting on the small of her back, guiding her down the stairs.

As they got to the doors, he reached out to push them open but remained like this for a moment, looking down at her. She stopped and their eyes locked, drowning in each other.

“I-… Marinette, I-…”

She put a hand on his shoulder to steady herself, tiptoed and placed a small kiss on his cheek, making him blush like crazy. She pulled away relatively quickly, the blush on her own face refreshed.

“I l-liked it. With you. Uhm, here.”

They both grinned, but he felt there was still something missing. Without another word, he grabbed her and pressed her to his chest, placing his cheek on her hair. He felt her gasping silently but he didn’t bother, he just held her close.

“Thanks, pri-… Uhm… Marinette.”, he mumbled, “Get home safely.”

As they parted, he saw a little insecurity in her movements, as if she was trying to see something in him but couldn’t quite sort it out whether she was just seeing things or not. She waved him goodbye and he leaned against the doorframe, trying to ignore his shaky legs, until she had vanished behind the wall, off to go home. A light breeze brushed through her dark-blue hair and he couldn’t help but stare.

Adrien got back to his room and let himself fall onto the bed, not trusting his legs to keep him upright any longer.

“Aaaaah…”, he sighed, happy with himself. He had kissed Marinette! He had kissed her, he had spent a day with her, he had-… Oh.

“Kid?”

The blonde opened his eyes again as he heard Plagg’s voice, now terrified.

“Uhm, yeah, Plagg?”

The small cat appeared in front of his face, his whiskers trembling slightly and his paws firmly locked in front of his chest.

“You do know what you just did, right?”

Adrien’s heart dropped. He had kissed Marinette. He had kissed the girl he had hurt so much, even if she had tried to convince him otherwise. He, as Chat Noir. He had-… He was lying to her. If he wanted anything, just the slightest trust from this relationship, he had to reveal. _Now_.

“And you know what you have to do.”, Plagg pushed on after a short pause.

Adrien gulped and sat up.

“Y-Yeah. I have to-… I have to reveal to her. I have to tell her everything so she can trust me.”

The black cat hovered in front of him in silence, his chesire eyes narrowing. Adrien tilted his head.

“Uhm-… Wha-”

“Well, what’re you waiting for?! She’s not exactly safe out there and you really gotta talk to her again! Stupid kid, transform already!”

She was not-… She was not safe! Adrien jumped up and ran to his window, just so seeing her vanishing behind a house corner.

“ _Plagg, claws out_!”


	44. Chapter 44

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The realization hits harder than expected. And not quite how Chat imagined it would go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The summary's shit again~  
> Anwyay! The big chapter!  
> Sorry not sorry for the ending, again :D Man, that was a ride up until now... But phew, let's see where it goes from now, huh? Breeze is not finished yet, do not fear! Still got a few thousand words to upload x)  
> Also, this is a birthday present! At least one half ;)  
> HAPPY BIRTHDAY, ELIANNA!!  
> Please enjoy~

Chat’s luminescent green eyes scanned the street in front of Marinette’s walking form with wariness. At any moment, some guys could jump out and attack her. He was on edge, anxious and highly alerted by any noise. If something happened to her now he would never forgive himself.

She slightly hesitated and Chat leant over the roof to keep her in view. Did she see something he had missed? Was there something lurking in the shadows? Why did she get slower?

Marinette looked up to the roofs and narrowed her eyes as he quickly ducked away to hide his green eyes and blonde hair. He heard her huffing, then she picked up speed again and followed the street to her home. He carefully peeked around a chimney to see her pulling out her keys, entering the bakery safely. Chat breathed through and allowed himself to relax for the moment.

She was okay.

She was safe.

Now the only thing left was to reveal himself. He had to be honest to her if he wanted to hope for more. Especially when he was her biggest threat, in her view, at the same time.

He saw her stepping into her parent’s apartment above the bakery, being greeted by her mother with a kiss on her cheek and a warm hug. She still shied away a little from her father but after a short hesitation she also hugged him, burying her face on his shoulder. Chat leant back, making himself comfortable on the roof as the girl and her family settled on the table for a dessert. Her parents must’ve eaten something just before, according to the dishes in the sink.

He smiled at the picture that was offered to him. A functioning family, regardless of what they had all gone through. A warmth that he could only dream of. That he had experienced a snippet of a few times now. When he had brought her home once. When he had been to her place before the whole mess had started. A warmth that he didn’t know he had missed until he had been introduced to it.

Marinette bid her parents goodnight and gifted them a smile as she went upstairs after they had all finished their sweet cinnamon buns. Sabine tried to give her something to her room but Marinette declined. The mother tried again and her daughter finally gave in, taking the plate while playfully rolling her eyes, then giving her a goodnight kiss.

Her father got one, too.

Chat found himself wishing he’d get one as well but that was unrealistic and he knew it. She’d hate him after her revealed.

Marinette closed the hatch to her room and appeared in the side window, setting down the plate on her desk. Then she waited for a bit, obviously checking her phone. She probably texted Alya. Or Nino.

Or him? Maybe? His heart skipped at the thought but he banned it. She had just seen him.

Then, his chance arrived and his hope turned to nervousness, his heart beating faster.

She went up to her balcony. He had to do it now. He had to reveal to her now.

Her thin silhouette appeared against the night sky and he could make out her profile against the lights of Paris. She was beautiful.

He sighed but got up, loosening his shoulders. He had to do it now.

She had to know.

But before he pulled out his baton to jump over to her house another thought struck him. A thought because of which he had wanted to talk to her anyway. Why had she said that Ladybug is still alive? Why had she tried to tell him directly after her akumatization? Did she know something?

He sighed and shook his head.

Revealing first. All the other stuff later.

 

* * *

 

As she stood on her balcony, gently stroking over the pieces of the worn bracelet and staring up at the few stars she could see, she felt nothing but a lightness she hadn’t felt in months. Of course, she was going crazy about Tikki and wondered if she was okay and the happenings of the last few weeks had shaken her up pretty much, but she was okay. And for now, that was a beginning.

Marinette sighed and felt the cold night air flood her lungs. Her parents were downstairs, probably tidying up the bakery. Soon, they would go to sleep.

The girl smiled at the sight of a brightly lit Eiffel tower and almost didn’t hear the soft thumps of a certain stray cat leaping over the roofs nearby. Her head jerked up at the familiar sound and she turned around right as Chat Noir landed on her balcony, in a perfect three-point-landing as it suited a superhero like him. A soft breeze swept over to her because of his arrival. He straightened himself and looked at her with piercing green eyes, but she didn’t see any hatred in his posture like she had suspected.

“Chat? Why are you here?”, she asked, her heart hammering against her ribcage. Was he here to avenge Ladybug? But he had promised to protect her. He hadn’t done anything up until now. He had scared away the vigilantes. Then why was his face unmoving?

The feline hero stretched his back and approached her, slowly, carefully. She backed away against the railing but somehow sensed she didn’t have to fear him. She didn’t know where the feeling came from but she just-… Knew.

“Let’s just say-…”, he stopped two steps away from her, still giving her enough room to feel safe, “I had to tell you something. Ask you something as well, actually, but-… Well, I feel like you should know the other things first.”

She tilted her head, allowing herself to relax a bit.

“What did you want to tell me?”, she curiously asked, winning back a bit of her courage. He was her partner. Or, well, used to be.

“I-…”, he trailed off, rubbing the back of his head with a gloved hand. He seemed uncertain, almost insecure, “I just-… Y-You know-…”

“If-… If you can’t tell me the fist thing-…”, she gulped as he caught her gaze again, “M-Maybe it’d be easier to ask the other thing?”

Chat sighed, almost looking disappointed in himself. He seemed to struggle with himself. But then he finally straightened up again and slowly stepped closer another small step.

“You-… You said something to me, right after you transformed back. I didn’t think about considering it until now because I was too upset and I-… I didn’t believe you, honestly… Although I should have, I hope?”, he stammered, a slight shaking undertone audible in his voice.

“What is it that I said to you?”, Marinette asked, already knowing what he was aiming at.

 _So this is it,_ she thought, _this is how I’ll tell Chat._

She was nervous, sure. But he had to know. If she wanted to have any chance of completely forgiving herself and getting Tikki back again, he had to know.

“You said-… You said Ladybug wasn’t dead and you could prove it. What did you mean by that? And do you still think, she is-…?”

The girl smiled, taking another little step towards Chat. Their breaths mixed with each other and she had to look up to him. The position was all too familiar.

“Yes.”, her voice was strong as she said it, “I still think she’s alive. I know she is.”

“You said that you could prove it.”, he retorted, a slight, desperate, maybe hopeful hint in his eyes.

“I did.”, another little step and her hand left the railing, hanging by her side. It trembled.

“Then-…”, he hesitated, turning away, “Where is she?”

Marinette took a deep breath, shoving away all her second thoughts. She had to do it now. She had to tell him. She had to somehow get over this all and get back Tikki. At least just to save her, if he wouldn’t allow her to be Ladybug again.

“Chat, it is not about where she is. It’s about who she is.”

The boy snapped around, tilting his head in surprise. His green eyes narrowed and the mask created folds where his eyebrows furrowed.

“You know about her secret identity? You want to tell me who she is?!”, now he sounded surprised. Pushing, even. Of course he would, she reprimanded herself. Telling him his partner was still alive and knowing her secret identity? She would probably feel the same if it had happened the other way around.

“No, that’s not it-…”, she quickly declined, her courage leaving her again. His shoulders slumped and he turned away again but she gave herself a push. With or without courage, with or without wanting him to know or fearing him or anything. He had to know. She had to save Tikki and she could only do it with his help!

“I want to tell you who I am.”

The words left her faster than she could process. They just tumbled off her lips, taking a big weight from her heart with them. As if every letter had weighed something. It was out. Form now on, it would be easier.

Again, Chat turned and his eyes widened in surprise. She reached out for his shoulder, still inching closer to him to comfort him.

“That may be a shock for you and you may not believe me, but-…”, she began, only to stop at his expression. He looked shocked.

Chat’s eyes widened even more and he let her touch his shoulder.

“W-Wha-…”

Hesitatingly, she dared to do the next step. Her thumb brushed over his suit on his shoulder and she gulped before speaking, her voice almost leaving her.

“Do you see me now, Chaton?”

His ragged breathing cut through the air and his gaze fixated Notre Dame only to flicker back to her face again within a second. He avoided her eyes but she knew he studied every inch of her face now. Seeing her. Recognizing her.

He breathed faster and she feared he would pass out.

“So-… Y-You-…”

Marinette nodded, tears pooling up in her eyes as she saw him realizing the truth, slowly. Starting to see what had really happened.

“Yes, Chat. Ladybug’s never been dead, as I told you. She’s-…”, she breathed through, “I am-… Right here.”

The blonde took a step to the side to lean on the railing and remained silent for a few moments, his eyes never leaving her face. She bit her lip as she watched his world crumble behind his eyes.

He, on the other hand, didn’t see anything she felt. He couldn’t. His vision was clouded by his own mistakes.

She, Ladybug herself, had been akumatized. She had been akumatized, overthrown by their enemy. She had been defeated by Hawkmoth. And he hadn’t noticed. He had fought his lady, he had kicked her, he had hated her, ignored her, left her to die and predetermined the worst few months of her life. He had done all this to his partner, the love of his life. He had thrown her away, he had mourned her when she had died right before his eyes. When she had suffered a little death, every day, right in front of his nose. And he hadn’t cared.

He hadn’t even shot two gazes her way. He had left her alone, failed her, disappointed her, hurt her, basically _killed_ her.

He had killed her. Not Marinette. Not Miss Fortune. Not Hawkmoth. Not Paris.

He, Chat Noir.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier, Chat. I really am.”, her voice cut through his thoughts, so familiar and so missed. He had ached for her, had missed her, had mourned her when he had seen her every single day.

The relief that she was still alive sent his heart soaring but the horrible memories of what he had done kept him floored.

Chat’s hand almost slipped from the railing, sending him to the floor. He could barely hold himself up anymore on his shaky knees.

While he tried to wrap his mind about the incredible misunderstanding that had happened, that had kicked off so much suffering in the last months, she craved for any sort of reaction, any kind of sign he was still processing or any trace of what he thought about this. Did he still think she was lying? Did he replay the last months?

Too many questions buzzed around in her head, trying to shove their way through to her mouth but none of them made it. Because her voice was caught in her throat as he spoke.

“My-…”, he swallowed, “My lady?”

“Yes?”

“It-… It was you the whole time…?”, he choked, his eyes wide and glowing of tears.

“It was.”

Before he could say something else, her relief overthrew her and she hugged him. Warm leather pressed against her cheek and she felt his hair brushing over hers as he hesitantly, carefully laid his cheek on her head.

“I am so-… So sorry…”, he whispered, his voice breaking. She felt the breeze of his breath brushing through her hair, something wet dropping as well. He was crying, she realized.

“Oh Chat, don’t be, it was not-”

“No, don’t say that! I was too stupid! I could’ve been there for you, could’ve been helping you! And I-… I thought I lost you-…”

Now it was her turn to swallow. She felt tears pricking in her eyes and leaned against him, hiding her face in his suit. He tightened his grip around her, almost as if he feared she would go again, and she quietly sobbed as she felt something cold, wet falling onto her neck now as they shifted positions.

“But I’m back now, kitty. I’m back and Hawkmoth’s got nothing on us.”

He let her run a hand through his messy hair and sighed shakily, sniffling.

“I’m glad it was you. I’m glad you’re-… You’re _alive_. And I’m glad I finally know you, my lady.”, he managed, the sobs evident in his hoarse voice.

She cried into his suit, holding herself upright against him. He shifted, breaking their hug but still embraced her. He looked into her eyes, his expression relieved and horrified at the same time. He still had something to say

“My lady, I-…”, he began and she brought her hand to his cheek, caressing it to encourage him. He swallowed and tried again, “I-… I have to-… You have to know who I am…”

Marinette gulped.

“Just-… Just let me reveal, too. Please. You-… You _have to_ know who I am.”

Her throat blocked but she barely managed to speak, shaking her head.

“No, Chat. We can’t risk knowing each other’s identities when we-…”

Chat softly shook his head, a breeze making his messed-up hair sway to the sides.

“Then why did you? I was the one who always wanted to reveal. If we had done this before, none of the things in the last months had happened. And you-… You have to know what happened back then. You have to know what I did. I know now and it’s especially important for you to know.”

“Yes, but I needed to show you or otherwise you wouldn’t have believed me. And I need your help with getting my Miraculous back. It’s far too dangerous for us to know each other.”, she sighed, “Hawkmoth could make use of that…”

His clawed hand brushed over her back and he bit his lip, tears now rolling down his cheeks.

“I-… I never want you to go through something like this again… Please, Marinette… Please let me reveal…”

Fear flicked through her eyes and he knew he had hit a sore spot for her. She didn’t want to go through this again. And now that this all had happened, because he didn’t know she had been Ladybug, it was a safety measure for them to know each other’s identities.

So, with a soft nod, she tried a smile to encourage herself.

“… Okay… I-… I have to see who you are.”

He breathed through and closed his eyes, then his voice came out in a broken whisper.

_“Plagg, claws in.”_


	45. Chapter 45

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Knowledge loading, knowledge loading... Mari.exe has not been found. Please reboot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Why.  
> Okay, well, the summeries are a joke by now, I admit it. Maybe I'll get more serious once the angst train will take a stop here again.  
> But right now I'll just keep them a joke until I get up with more dramatic ones again :D  
> Anyway, another big chapter! A lot happening here, ergo a little longer than normal.  
> Enjoy~

His transformation fell instantly, as if Plagg wanted to remove the suit as quickly as possible. With a green flash, a sizzling sound and the feeling of relief, instantly clearing his mind, Adrien stood on Marinette’s balcony. She had closed her eyes due to the light and he smiled, caressing her cheek with a very human hand, no gloves, no claws. Marinette slightly flinched under his touch, knowing he waited for her to open her eyes.

“Marinette?”, he carefully asked as she slowly pulled up her shoulders, obviously feeling uncomfortable, “Marinette, what’s wrong?”

“E-Everything is gonna be different…”, she whispered, her eyes still squinted, “I’ll know who you are and it won’t matter if I already know you or not, it’ll all be different. You-… You won’t be my Chat Noir anymore, you’ll be-… You’ll have an actual name…”

He chuckled at that, shrugging.

“Well, Chat Noir was no actual name before?”

She furrowed her eyebrows and pouted, then shook her head.

“A name that I’ll connect things to and-… And someone I will see Chat Noir in but also the civilian you are and-… It’ll all be different.”

He held her closer, nuzzling his nose against her forehead.

“Marinette, you don’t have to open your eyes, you know? You-… You can just leave it like this an-”

“Absolutely not.”, Plagg chimed in.

Adrien rolled his eyes and sighed.

“Plagg, shut up. She needs time, okay?”, he reprimanded his Kwami, still keeping his face close to hers. The tiny black cat merely rolled his eyes.

“Sure.”, and the sarcasm dripped out between his fangs.

Adrien turned his attention back to the girl in his arms and brushed over her back, his voice turning soft.

“Marinette, I’m just saying it could only help. We should know who the other is to protect each other. Because I didn’t know you are Ladybug all this here happened. I-… I just don’t wanna see you hurt again. And-… I-… I wanna be honest to you.”

She sighed, her muscles around her eyes slowly relaxing. He bit his lip and leant back a bit, anticipation eating him up.

“Okay-… Okay…”, she finally sighed, bringing her hands up to her face to rub over it. Then she hugged him again, her eyes slowly fluttering open.

Green met blue and she screamed. Before he could react in any way, she had already jumped out of his arms, pushed him away and screamed. He stood there, completely dumbstruck, his Kwami hovering next to him, as her scream quickly died down because she realized her parents would probably worry if they heard her.

Her eyes were wide as she took in who he really way and he immediately felt bad and guilty again. He wanted to let her take the time she needed, wanted to let her speak first, but it got increasingly difficult as she remained like this, pressed against the wall, eyes and mouth widely opened, shock obviously written over her features. He assumed she remembered what he had done to her. That he had kissed her mere hours ago. That her partner had done everything wrong that he could. That he had failed her, had disappointed her and overall still tried to make a move on her. He was just about to let himself be eaten up by his guilt as she suddenly made a step towards him.

Adrien held his breath, his chest tightening. She took another step and he pressed his lips together not to say anything.

Her eyebrows furrowed as she took the last step to stand right in front of him, her hand shakily and slowly coming up to brush over his eyebrow with her thumb. He willed himself to remain calm and collected, to let her speak first, to give her everything she needed while the guilt threatened to rip him to his knees, begging for her forgiveness.

She looked concentrated as her fingertips brushed down his cheeks, her eyes narrowing at a scratch he had gotten a few days back. She pressed her lips together before parting them again, now slowly whispering since her voice was non-existent.

“… I should’ve known…”, she finally said, her fingertips softly caressing the scratch on his cheek, “It was so obvious…”

“B-Because I was such an asshole?”, he finally forced out but she quickly shook her head.

“No… No. Because you acted so weirdly when Miss Fortune had told her lie… Because you, as Adrien, didn’t make sense to me… Because-… Because-…”

“… I had lost way more than Adrien was allowed to lose.”, he finished her thought and she nodded.

“Exactly. I-… I should’ve seen it, I should’ve understood it.”

He quickly shook his head, his gaze softening. He pushed his feelings of guilt aside for the moment to speak to her and bring everything in order again but he knew it’d break out of him as soon as she wouldn’t be with him anymore.

“No, princess… No… I should’ve seen it. I should’ve known… I should’ve known from the beginning that Miss Fortune was lying, with or without knowing about your secret identity. I should’ve recognized a trap like this.”

“You couldn’t.”, she argued, “Ladybug never showed up again. You had to believe she was dead, along with the whole of Paris.”

“But-”

She shook her head, not wanting to speak now. He closed his mouth again, looking down at her through guilt-ridden green eyes. After a few moments, she stretched up to him, her gaze fixed on his lips. She couldn’t prevent it, couldn’t stop her knees from shaking and couldn’t hinder her eyes from fluttering close. At the same time, she didn’t want to.

He was blaming himself and she had to stop him from doing that. She had to make him stop talking, stop thinking about it. And she knew for a fact that she could cause that.

His eyes closed too and they leant in even closer. They felt their hot breathes breezing over their skin, their noses brushing against each other and suddenly, Adrien had to steady Marinette completely as her strength left her.

They met a few lingering moments later.

Her lips pressed against his, feeling his warm skin above hers.

It was a soft kiss, he was warm against her, and it filled her heart to the brim with emotions.

Soon, Marinette didn’t feel her legs anymore. She trembled in his arms, unable to stand alone anymore and so she held herself up with her arms around his shoulders. He pushed against her, leading her back to the wall of the chimney, leaning on it with his arms between her and the cold wall. A light breeze played with their hair, but Marinette was warm. They pressed themselves against each other as if they were their last hope to survive.

This was the girl he had watched jump across Paris’ rooftops for almost four years now, Adrien now finally realized completely. They had been fourteen when they had been chosen and now he just had his eighteenth birthday. They had been best friends since then, he had been in love as she had with him. And they had, no matter what had happened, found each other again.

Right in the middle of their kiss, though, she felt his jerking away suddenly. And as she opened her eyes she saw Adrien glaring at his Kwami, rubbing his cheek.

“Plagg, what the hell?! What was that? We’re busy right now, in case you didn’t notice, why did you pinch me?”, he asked, furious with his Kwami.

“I was annoyed and didn’t really want to watch and be bored for you two to just smooch each other’s faces while I could eat something. You got any cheese?”

Adrien grumbled something about being impolite and patted his pockets only to sigh in relief and pull out a wheel of camembert.

“There. Oh, and Plagg, Marinette. Marinette, Plagg. He’s my Kwami.”

She nodded, holding out a hand. As the Kwami didn’t react but instead took the cheese from Adrien she tilted her head. Adrien furrowed his eyebrows and softly smacked Plagg’s tiny head.

“Sorry, he’s a bit-… He has his own idea of politeness.”

“I don’t need to be nice to everyone as long as I don’t get any cheese.”

“You have cheese, now ditch it for two seconds and say hello.”

“Fiiiiiiiiine.”, he took a finger of hers in his tiny paws and shook it lightly.

“Hey Plagg. Nice to meet you.”

“Hi.”, in the blink of an eye, his voice grew dangerous, “Where’s Tikki?”

In an instant, Marinette tensed and kneaded the seam of her shirt, looking down. She realized they didn’t know what had happened to her Miraculous, only Alya and Nino knew.

“Is everything alright, princess?”, Adrien asked, putting a warm hand on her shoulder. Her eyes fluttered but she didn’t look up to them.

“I’m going to get a little more cheese, wait. I’m sure that’s not enough for him.”

“Now that’s someone with a normal perception of the world, Adrien!”

He rolled his eyes and let her go, not following her as she climbed down into her room. She ran down and got a few cheese breads for Plagg, wishing her parents a good night and went up to her bed again. As soon as she opened the hatch she felt Adrien taking her hand.

“May I help you up, my lady?”

“So we’re flirty again, huh?”, she grinned. He just snorted and helped her up, closing the hatch behind her. She walked across her balcony so she could sit on one of the chairs. Adrien seated himself beside her, gently resting a hand on the small of her back. Plagg flew up to her and sniffed.

“What’s that I smell? Is that cheese?!”

“Of course. It’s all yours, Plagg. I hope you like them.”, she smiled and handed him one of the cheese breads. He immediately flew off again, munching away loudly. However, she had to tell them, so she turned to Adrien, kneading her hands and biting her lip. Suddenly, it all felt harder now that she knew who Chat was.

“There’s another reason why we have to go up against Hawkmoth except stopping him. Plagg, I’m sorry, but that’s why Tikki’s not here.”

The munching stopped and she heard Plagg’s voice coming closer as she squinted her eyes.

“What do you mean by that? Where is she and-… So I was right! You’re not wearing your Miraculous!”

“You see-…”

Adrien leaned in, inspecting her ears, his hand on her back gently curling.

“You’re right, no earrings.”

“H-Hawkmoth has my Miraculous. Hawkmoth has-… He has Tikki.”

They both gasped and Marinette flinched, biting her lip.

“When I was akumatized, I could take them off in time. But I wasn’t fast enough to hide them and as Miss Fortune already had the control over my body, it was too late. She told Hawkmoth I am Ladybug and she brought them to him.”

Plagg exploded. Literally.

She felt the breeze of heat on her face as the tiny god of destruction lost his temper, raging furiously with cat sounds and a few well selected curses in quite a lot of languages.

Luckily for her, Adrien moved in front of her by standing up and managed to get the Kwami away, calming him in the process. As she opened her eyes she merely saw Adrien’s back to her and something glowing in front of him.

“Calm down, Plagg! We’re gonna get her back. And Marinette’s not to bla-… _What did you do that for?!_ Plagg, you burned me!”

“Not as bad as I’ll burn Hawkmoth when I lay my paws on him!! He’s got Tikki and you say her useless Miraculous wielder is not to blame?! She lost her damn earrings and now Hawkmoth’s doing who knows what to her!!”

“Hey, it’s not her fault! She’s the victim here, same as Tikki! Why are you saying these things?! Marinette’s not useless!”

“Ugh, I-…! Okay, I am sorry.”, she heard Adrien pausing, baffled.

“… What did you just say? Did you just-… Apologize?”

“Yeah, I did, problem with that?”, Adrien turned and Plagg came closer, looking normal again. Marinette flinched as he came to a stop in front of her, “I’m sorry, Marinette. I’m just-… I’m worried for Tikki. Of course, it’s not your fault.”

Tiny paws were placed on top of her hand and she watched as he brushed over her skin. She lifted one for him to rub his head on, giving him the pats he craved for. He immediately began purring.

“It’s okay Plagg. I’m just as worried. And-… I’m sorry…”

She heard Adrien sitting down beside her again as she kept her gaze down on the cat in her lap, stroking a gentle hand up and down her arm. She smiled and put her free hand over his, still patting Plagg.

“… Plagg, that was weird.”

“ _What?_ She’s giving me cheese bread and pats, I like her! And, well, I was unfair, admittedly.”

“She’s still my lady, so _back off_ already.”, Adrien growled.

“Never! She gives me food. She must be a princess!”

“Guys, guys-… We have more important things to discuss, don’t you think?”, although it was true, Marinette certainly couldn’t hide a little smirk.

“Right, sorry…”, Adrien turned to her again and swallowed, “Of course. What do we do?”

Marinette immediately lost her smile and her shoulders slumped.

“We-… We have to get my Miraculous back. Thus, we have to attack Hawkmoth.”

She felt his hand squeezing her arm a bit, reassuring her.

“We got this, don’t worry. We’ll bring Tikki back and we’ll defeat Hawkmoth, we’re ready.”

“Maybe we are, as our superhero personas, yes-…”, she sighed, “But I’m not Ladybug at the moment. I’m just a civilian. We may be ready as a superhero team. What about now?”

“My lady, you’re still Ladybug, in and out the mask.”

“That’s what Tikki said too…”

He lightly huffed, his hand sliding across her back to her other arm, wrapped around her shoulders to give her a quick one-armed hug.

“Don’t worry, princess. We got this. I’ll protect you.”

She bit her lip and her hand nervously scratched Plagg between his ears.

“I know, where Hawkmoth’s lair is located. I even went there a few times in civilian form. There are no entrances or such and because of this I suspect he has a secret passage. Or he gets there while being transformed, but I don’t believe that. Someone would have seen him. And he’s there every evening, I don’t quite know why. Maybe he’s preparing something? Oh and-… I shouldn’t run in being Marinette. Maybe I should wear a costume? To confuse Hawkmoth a bit?”, she began rambling.

“Like a trap kind of thing? To confuse him?”, he furrowed his eyebrows and she nodded.

“Yeah, just like that. Maybe that’ll catch him off guard and he’ll give us the chance to snatch the real Miraculous from him. And-… I would feel safer… B-Because, you know-… The colors always made me feel like-…”, she gulped.

He stroked her hand and she bet he smiled even though she didn’t see it since her gaze was still fixed on Plagg.

“That’s a great idea, my lady.”

“Thanks…”, she sighed, “When do we do it?”

“Maybe in a week? We need to be fast and can’t waste any time. Maybe he is already somewhere else and we really need to get your Miraculous back.”, he pointed out. Her eyebrows went up and she hoped, she looked at him right now.

“I-In a week?”

“Yes. We still need time to prepare and adjust but we need to catch him off guard. You said he knows who you are? Well then, he maybe heard of you and what happened to you. Maybe he doesn’t suspect you to attack that soon, just a month after-”, he broke off and she knew what he meant.

“Or maybe he thinks I would never attack because he doesn’t think you would listen to me and of course, I alone am too weak.”

Chat snorted.

“I wouldn’t say that. Hawkmoth is not stupid. He knows what he’s doing and he knows, someday you’ll come to get your Miraculous, with or without me. Because you _are_ still Ladybug.”

She nodded, thoughtful.

“Hawkmoth is not stupid, yeah… So, in a week it is then. I’ll make sure to get a Ladybug costume by then and then we’ll rescue Tikki.”

“That’s the spirit!”, Plagg spoke up, between two bites and with a mouthful cheese bread.

She smiled, giggling a bit.

It was shortly after midnight when she kicked them out. They’d had quite a lot to catch up on but it certainly was getting late and she still had to take a call.

As soon as she had kissed him on the cheek for a goodbye, he leapt off, winking at her when he disappeared in the darkness. She waved after him, smiling. Then, she got off the balcony, taking the empty cocoa mugs with her. This night was still not ending and she knew, what came next was going to be difficult. Not as big as revealing their secret identities but certainly as difficult on her heart. As soon as she’d brought the mugs down in the kitchen and was upstairs in her room again, she pulled out her phone and sat on her chair on the desk.

 

**Marinette:** Hey Alya. Got time to call?

 

**Alya:** Ofc girl, hang in there. Just finishing up the blog

 

**Marinette:** Yeah. Call me in a sec?

 

**Alya:** Sure!

 

The bluenette leant back. She sighed and tried to relax, going through her thoughts one more time.

Chat was Adrien.

Adrien was Chat.

Their plan to get Tikki back and maybe even defeat Hawkmoth.

She probably wouldn’t get any sleep tonight.


	46. Chapter 46

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes, you gotta break down before you can pick yourself up again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gotta run!  
> Enjoy~

Marinette breathed through one last time before she would have to confess to her best friend. She would be going to confront her arch enemy in a costume and they would wait until Hawkmoth was in his lair again. She hoped he would be there the next week, too. Because she wasn’t sure if she could build up that much courage again if he didn’t show up.

Taking a deep breath, she clenched her teeth and rubbed over the soft surface of her bracelet. Then, they would surprise him and she hoped, her costume would catch him off guard that much, that Chat would be able to snatch the Miraculous. When she had Tikki back, she would be back in business and then they would take out Hawkmoth – eventually.

She heard her phone going off and was quick to answer. Marinette clicked on video chat and plucked in her headphones so that her parents wouldn’t wake up.

_“Hey girl, what’s up?”_

Marinette sighed, a bit of relief flashing inside her thoughts.

“Hey Alya. Glad you made time.”

The brunette laughed and shook her head.

_“For you anytime. So, what’s up?”_

She sighed again, calming herself. Her best friend got a bit anxious, pulling up an eyebrow.

_“Everything okay?”_

“Yeah, yeah Alya-…”

_“Something’s up. What is it? Cat’s got your tongue?”_

“You could say that-…”

Her eyes went wide and suddenly, her face was very close to the camera.

_“What’s up, for real now.”_

Marinette gulped.

“Chat just visited.”

It went silent for a moment and Alya slumped back on her bed. She bit her lip and looked away, trying not to lose her control in front of her. She had to be strong or otherwise she would back out.

_“… What happened?”_ , Alya asked after quite some time.

“Well, you see, he wanted to ask me about this… Thing that I said to him, after my transformation back from Miss Fortune, and it was about how I could prove to him that Ladybug is not dead. And, well, he wanted to tell me something as well.”

Alya nodded, encouraging her to continue.

“Well, I told him that I am Ladybug…”

_“Good. Did he believe you? Is he helping you?”_

“Yeah. He recognized me and apologized to me and so on.”

_“Really good! I’m proud of you, girl!”_

“Hah, yeah… Funny thing that after he revealed as well I kissed him then, isn’t it? Anyways, as I was saying-…”, Marinette tried to go over that fact with a nervous laughter but Alya interrupted her – of course.

_“HOLD UP! Say whaaaaaaaaat?! You both revealed to each other?! He kissed you?! Just like this? And what did it feel like? Girl, I need all the deets!”_

“Alya, slow down… Well, I was with Adrien before, we had fun, we kissed, then he appeared on my balcony as Chat Noir and we revealed to each other and I-… I was kinda relieved it was all solved between us now and I had to shut him up because he was starting to beat himself up and-”

_“You guys kissed two times?! And-… And you revealed to each other and-… What the heck?!”_

Marinette tried to play it off again before a thought struck her that she hadn’t considered before.

“Alya-… Why aren’t you in the slightest bit surprised that Adrien is Chat Noir?”

She saw her best friend gulping before she guiltily tried a smile, absolutely not fooling Marinette.

_“I-… Might’ve-… Found out beforehand?”_

There was a silence in the call that obviously made Alya nervous. Marinette remained unmoving until she threw her free arm up, whisper yelling so she wouldn’t wake her parents.

“Say freaking what?!”

The brunette merely rolled her eyes and sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose.

_“See, I just found out about him the same I found out about you, by observing. Well, I suspected him to be Chat Noir for longer already, since tenth grade actually, bu-”_

“What?!”

By now it became really hard for Marinette to still remain silent.

_“I just-… It was so obvious and I think it was mostly his magic and probably also yours to keep me from finding out but it has become to increasingly obvious since Miss Fortune and-”_

The girl sighed, shaking her head.

“… Just-… Could we not talk about this? I have more important things to tell you. This whole reveal stuff can actually wait now that I know you know everything anyway.”

_“Yeah, of course, go on.”_ , Alya looked sheepish while Marinette could stop a slight smirk.

“It’s alright. So, after that we talked a bit, about what had happened. I told him that Hawkmoth had my Miraculous and his Kwami Plagg kinda freaked out about that.”

_“Wait, his Kwami? Shouldn’t Plagg be inside his Mira-?”_ , the realization struck Alya and she facepalmed, _“Of course he dropped his transformation.”_

“Well, yeah…”

_“You’re telling me he detransformed right on your balcony?! Visible for anyone passing by?!”_

Marinette smiled sheepishly and laughed a bit.

“Well, we were careful and we-… We didn’t exactly check but I’m sure there was nobody-”

_“You just did?! Oh girl, you can’t be serious!!”_

“Alya, just let me tell you what’s important, please!”

Her best friend sighed, only to wave her to continue while she brought her other hand up to her eyes.

“Anyway, we’re going to face Hawkmoth. _We_ are. As in, he’ll be transformed and I’m… wearing a costume?”

Again, silence filled the call. It became longer and longer, Alya’s face obscured by her hands, her phone apparently propped up against something, standing on her desk. For a few moments, Marinette feared the call had died.

_“… What?”_

“As I said, Chat Noir and me fighting against Hawkmoth. And I’ll be a civilian.”, she tried again after receiving a sign of life from her best friend.

_“… When?”_

“In a week.”

For what came next, Marinette had to pull her headphones out of her ears and put her phone on mute. She watched as Alya’s face became redder and redder. Quickly, Marinette tried to calm her.

“Alya, Alya shh! Please! You’ll wake your sisters! And your mother will not be very happy about this! So stop yelling at me already!”

Alya had to catch her breath and shot a furious look at Marinette.

“Thanks. Are you okay?”

_“If I’m okay, she’s asking. That’s what she’s asking. Naturally she’s-… Of course, I’m not! Marinette, Hawkmoth’s gonna kill you!”_

“Alya, I’m sorry, but we have to try. I have to get Tikki back, she’s in danger!”

Her best friend nodded. Of course she needed to rescue her Kwami. Sighing, she breathed out and a strand of her brown-reddish hair was moved by the breeze.

_“Then I’ll come with you guys.”_ , she finally decided.

“… No way.”

_“You’re going, so why shouldn’t I come too?!”_

“Because I am still Ladybug! You’re a civilian!”, Marinette argued, already knowing she would lose this fight.

_“I’m just as much a civilian as you are at the moment.”_

“There’s no way I’m letting you tag along, Alya! Just-… No!”

_“Then I’ll be following you!”_ , her best friend remained stubborn, her hands now in her hair. Marinette could see she wasn’t only being stubborn. There was a huge portion of despair and fear coming with that as well.

“No. End of discussion.”

_“Of course, Maman.”_ , Alya sarcastically replied.

As it went on like this for a few minutes, Marinette began to feel really tired. Her eyelids grew heavy and she yawned. Alya seemed to notice but she wouldn’t give in.

_“Girl, we should get you to sleep. But don’t think we’re through with that discussion. I’ll see you tomorrow and I’ll annoy you to no end.”_

“Alright-…”, Marinette yawned, “But tomorrow, my opinion will be the same, guaranteed.”

_“We’ll see about that. Goodnight girl.”_

“G’night, Alya.”

They hung up and Marinette practically fell on her bed. _What a day_ , was her last thought, before she fell asleep in a very uncomfortable position but found herself too tired to even care.

 

* * *

 

While Marinette settled for the night, though, Adrien dropped his transformation and started pacing in his room. Plagg took a seat on the boy’s pillow, watching his chosen walk from one end of his room to the other, his hands restless on his body. He brushed his shirt straight, he gripped his hair, he rubbed his palms on his jeans.

“Talk to me, kid.”, the tiny god finally said, leaning back. He surprisingly hadn’t once complained about being hungry.

“I-… It’s just-… E-Everything happened so _fast_ , Plagg… I-I asked her out, we kiss and the next thing I know is that we’re kissing again and she’s Ladybug and-…”

Plagg sighed and nodded as Adrien began rambling faster and faster, telling him everything both already knew. But he had to say it out loud, everything, to realize it was real.

“And, and, and then she told me she was _Ladybug_ and I didn’t even know _what to do_ , what to say, I didn’t know _what to say_! She just stood there, she just was there and she was Ladybug and I tried keeping my composure because she’s Ladybug but there were important things to-… I had to tell her how I felt about this, I had to reveal myself, I had to show her I’m not hiding anything anymore, I was just-… I couldn’t freak out then! I couldn’t let myself lose it in front of her because there were more important things and I realized everything but pushed it away and, and, I-”

“Kid-”

“Everything was just suddenly there and I didn’t even know, I don’t even know what to do _now_ , I just can’t believe I hurt my lady, I can’t believe I was ready to _see her die_ , I can’t believe I was ready to watch a human die for _months_ , Plagg, _for months_ and-”

“Adrien-”

“I-… I think I’m losing it, I think I’m losing my mind, I’m trembling, I can’t-… I _can’t do this_ , Plagg, I can’t!”

“Adrien.”

“What?!”, he whipped around to his Kwami, his entire body trembling and his eyes wild.

“Breathe. And then, let it all out. Just let it out. We both know what happened, we both know what you did.”, he floated up, in front of Adrien’s face, “You’re allowed to break down, kid. You’re allowed to let this all overwhelm you. But only under two conditions.”

Adrien hesitantly nodded, tears already pooling in his eyes.

“Wh-What conditions?”

“You’ll pick yourself up again in the morning and you’ll talk to Marinette. That’s all.”

Just as Plagg finished talking, Adrien fell to his knees, leaning against the back of his couch, and started sobbing. The Kwami nodded, satisfied that the boy wouldn’t bottle it up, and snuggled close to his neck. They stayed like this until the first rays of sunlight broke through the night and lit up the city. And as Adrien promised he stood up, took a shower and made himself ready for school.

 

* * *

 

The next morning Marinette woke up pretty late. Well, her night had been pretty eventful and short so she couldn’t exactly bring herself to care. She stayed in bed until it was half an hour to the lesson, dressed herself, grabbed a croissant from the tray her mother just carried to fill the displays and gave her a kiss on the cheek, giggling at her dumbstruck expression. Then she ran to the school, even with still ten minutes to spare. There, Adrien already waited for her, on the steps leading up to the schoolyard.

“Hey princess!”, he greeted her, a bright gin plastered on his face. She grinned right back, coming to a stop in front of him. But as she came closer she noticed his grin wasn’t 100% true, his eyes were tired and his body slouched.

“Hi kitty! Nice to see you waited for me.”

Adrien tiredly laughed at that, wrapping his arm around her shoulder and starting to walk up the stairs with her not to be late to the lesson. Her heart practically skipped as she felt his warmth on her side but she couldn’t help but worry.

“Well, of course I would! Can’t go without escorting my lady to the lesson, especially since I wanna talk to her for a bit first.”

“Talk about what?”, Marinette asked carefully, a little skeptical at that. She was still hesitant when it was about confrontation but Adrien reassuringly squeezed her shoulder, calming her.

“I just-… I’m not sure how to proceed now…”, he openly started off, slowly coming to a halt in front of the second flight of stairs up to their classroom. She turned to him after checking if someone watched them and cautiously wound her arms around his middle, still fearing someone wouldn’t allow her to do that.

“How to proceed…?”, she asked, already careful. Would he push her away again?

He sighed and leaned his forehead against hers, closing his eyes. She did the same, feeling safe as he did it.

“Well… Now we know who we are and-… I-… I know what I did to you… I-… I messed up, badly, and while I know how you feel about this I can’t help but blame myself…”

“Oh Chaton…”, Marinette whispered, bringing one hand up to his cheek to caress it, “You know I forgive you. You know I don’t even need to forgive you because you just acted as everyone would’ve acted in your position. All you gotta do is-… Is forgive yourself. That’s all.”

He pressed his lips together, nudging her head with his, pushing her back in an attempt to cuddle closer to her. She loosened up a little, partially held up by his arms now.

“I-… I don’t know if I can forgive myself… I’ve done so much wrong and I-… I wouldn’t even have cared in the first few weeks if I had lost my cool and had-… I-… I don’t even know-…”

“… You would’ve killed me.”, she concluded and he nodded, starting to tremble. Her hand slipped from his cheek into his hair, starting to scratch him, “Adrien, you believed I had killed your partner. You have this incredible power at hand and you were close to losing it. Even if-… Even then, I couldn’t have forgiven you. Even then, I wouldn’t have had the right to b-because-… I can’t deny that I would’ve considered the same if I believed someone – even you – had killed my sweet Kitten…”

He tilted his head so his nose touched hers, then he placed a small kiss on her lips.

“I’m so sorry, Marinette… I’m so-… So sorry that I-…”

“Don’t be.”, she firmly interrupted him, her eyes fluttering open again to catch his gaze, “Don’t think about what has been. Think about where we are now. We know who we are and-… Hell, we’re kissing in the school yard, Chaton. Just-… Be grateful you haven’t lost your temper and-… That we both stayed strong up until now. Hey, Adrien, we’ll work on this. You can come to my therapy and we can let you feel better about this, okay? And I’m with you, just like you’re with me, on every step of the way.”

He gave her another little kiss and now she tasted salt on his lips.

“I can do that.”, he finally whispered.


	47. Chapter 47

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some thing need to be sorted out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the rushed update on Thursday and especially sorry for the late update today but I had some problems with my laptop.  
> I'm just glad it's still working ;D  
> Anwyay, new chapter! it's kinda a little bit a filler because a few things had to be cleared but now that it's all cleared up we can move to more exciting things ;)  
> Enjoy~

They walked up the stairs together, next to each other. Quite a few heads turned as they climbed onto the first level, both smiling widely.

Alya was the first to walk towards them, throwing her arms around Marinette first and then pulling Adrien close. They laughed at her excited, unintelligible sounds that she squeaked into Marinette’s shoulder. As she finally parted from them again she pressed a kiss to Marinette’s cheek, grinning brightly.

“Everything’s sorted out?”, she asked joyfully and they nodded. Adrien smiled down to Marinette, his hand finding hers, squeezing gently when he interlaced their fingers.

“Yes, everything sorted out and understood.”

Alya rolled her eyes, quietly laughing.

“You both are unbelievable. Unbelievably stupid and narrowminded and oblivious. I’m not talking about the last months, I’m talking about the last years. You two, really…”, she shook her head with a snort, then she turned as Nino came to a halt next to her.

“Uhm… What’s going on here?”

Adrien was about to reply as Alya already patted Nino’s arm, lightly tugging on his sleeve.

“The thing I told you about on the phone this night? Yeah… So it’s okay now. We’re all okay.”

Nino’s eyes lit up as he remembered, parting from Alya to pull his friends into a tight hug.

“God, I’m so glad… I’m so glad. Just a few weeks ago I thought everything was over and now we’re standing here oh god…”, he sniffled as both Marinette and Adrien brushed over his back. Alya joined and they all remained like this for a bit.

“Unbelievable…”, Marinette whispered, repeating Alya’s words from before, “Yeah, it is unbelievable.”

As they all pulled away again they noticed a few tears pooling up in their eyes, tears of joy and relief.

“Well, anyway…”, Alya spoke up, brushing over her eyes, “Even if I want to fangirl for the next hour, I got a few things to clear up. We still need to finish our discussion that we started tonight.”

Marinette sighed, nodding.

“Of course… And as I said earlier, my answer is no. You won’t tag along. You’ll get hurt.”, her eyebrows furrowed and her gaze hardened, “There is no way of convincing me, Alya.”

“I will not get hurt!”, he best friend protested but before Marinette could retort something Nino stepped closer to Alya, his expression questioning. As she glanced up she saw the same expression on Adrien’s face.

“Wait, wait… What are you two talking about?”, the boy asked, his hand finding its way to Alya’s back. She leant against him, crossing her arms.

“Marinette told me last night that Adrien and her would-…”, she lowered her voice, “Well… That they would go up against Hawkmoth. I want to tag along.”

“Alya, it’s no game. I can’t even keep myself safe! You won’t just come along!”, the smaller girl pressed her lips together, feeling Adrien supportively turning towards her.

“I have to agree with my lady here. Alya, it’s too dangerous.”

“I can help!”

Marinette sighed, hushing her voice again because they were getting louder and some students started looking. She grabbed her best friend’s arm and pulled her to the side, the boy following.

“No, you can’t. I can’t even help and I’m Ladybug herself. So I won’t put you in danger!”

Alya pouted and looked to the ground. Suddenly, Marinette saw tears shining in her eyes.

“Oh, nononononono, Alya, I didn’t mean it like that! I just-… I can’t let you come along because I don’t want you hurt! I can’t-… I can’t see you hurt again. Not after what Miss Fortune – I – did to you…”

Her best friend looked up, threw her arms around her and pulled her close. The bluenette gasped and froze, not understanding what was happening.

“I-… I can’t lose you again.”, Alya finally whispered and Marinette’s chest tightened. She looked up to meet Nino’s helpless gaze, “I can’t sit by and do nothing while you’re risking your life. I want to help. And if it means taking a blow for you. I’d do that any second for you-… I-… I can’t see you hurt again, as you said. So let me try and protect you as you tried to do for me while Miss Fortune controlled your body.”

Marinette groaned and buried her face in Alya’s hair.

“I just-… I can’t take you with us. It’ll get too dangerous, so I want you to stay away when you could be in danger to life, do you understand?”

The brunette sniffled and snuggled up to her neck.

“Please, Marinette… I-… I’ll stay at the sidelines, I’ll stay away if you want me to. I just-… I need to be able to protect you…”

Marinette glanced up again to see Nino furrowing his eyebrows. He adjusted his cap and his expression changed into a slightly irritated one.

“But what about yourself, Marinette? You’ll get hurt! We-… We can’t-…”

“Yeah, but I need to go.”, she pointed out. Adrien bit his lip for a moment, then he decided to speak up as well.

“She-… She needs to retrieve her Miraculous. I’ll be the one fighting and she’ll try to get Tikki back, her Kwami. As soon as that happened she’ll join me in the fight. I don’t want her there either but I need her.”

“Well, then, you have a reason. Alya, you’re not going.”

The brunette parted from her best friend and turned to Nino with a surprised and indignant expression on her face.

“You’re supposed to be on my side!”, she shot at him but he merely pulled up his eyebrows, obviously unimpressed.

“Alya, you’ll get hurt. It’s been my job to keep you safe since we became friends. Now that we’re more it’s even more important to me that you’ll stay safe. We’ve all gone through enough pain and injuries in the last months.”, Adrien’s gaze briefly flickered to the scar Nino had gotten as he had saved the little kid during the Desertifier. Then his attention was drawn to the wounds on Alya’s arm that still looked as if they were open but not bleeding. They had come from cataclysm.

“But-”

“Alya, I won’t let you go with them. Don’t you understand you’re in over your head? I won’t watch your mother cry as we bury you, okay?!”

Marinette quickly stepped up to intervene as more and more people began watching them but Alya furrowed her eyebrows, now angry.

“Of course, Papa, I’ll sit at home while my best friend tries to go up against a maniac in a simple costume!”

Nino rolled his eyes and put his hands to his hips, trying to keep his voice low but to his luck the bell went off and the hallway filled with louder chatter as the students turned to get into their classrooms.

“Well, at least it is not you. Marinette’s Ladybug. At least she knows what she’s doing!”

“How about we’ll just get you with us too, then?”, Adrien spoke up again and while Marinette sighed and leant against his chest, Alya and Nino didn’t quite notice.

“Let the grown-ups sort this out, man!”

Adrien shook his head and looked down to her, his hand coming to her cheek. She lightly shook her head, it was obvious she didn’t want any of them to come with them. Well, he didn’t want Nino in this danger either but it was clear they wouldn’t come to a solution. Alya was too stubborn for that.

They turned to their friends who were still arguing, both with a stern expression on their face.

“You’re not really thinking about bringing them _both_ , do you, Adrien?”

He closed his eyes and was about to reason with her but something poked his chest. He smiled at Marinette apologetically and left her with their friends to find a silent, hidden place to talk to Plagg. As soon as he was in a small storage room his Kwami floated out, his eyes careful and somehow guided.

“What is it, Plagg?”, Adrien asked, already fearing his answer. Interrupting him as school was about to start in such an important discussion could only mean trouble.

“Kid, the two have to come with you.”

“Wh-What?!”, the blonde whisper-yelled, narrowing his eyes at his small friend, “You can’t be serious!”

“I actually am.”

Terrified, Adrien tried to lock their gazes but Plagg looked away.

“You’re not serious.”

“I am. Now, before you’ll say anything, listen to me. This situation’s giving me this really weird feeling that we’ll need both of them. And-… It’s just-… I see things when I think about it-… Really, everytime I saw those things it was my intuition. I think, they should both tag along.”

“You can’t be _serious_ , r-right?”, Adrien asked for a third time, causing Plagg to roll his eyes.

“You’re repeating yourself. And yes, I am.”, he replied, with an honest ring to his voice, “I totally am, kid. I don’t quite know why he feel like this, but we’ll need help to defeat Hawkmoth. You alone can’t keep him occupied, not until Marinette has her Miraculous back. What better help than them?”

Adrien groaned and rubbed over his face, remaining quiet for a few moments. Then he looked up again, his lips pressed together. He motioned his Kwami to hide in his jacket again, then he stepped out to join his friends, Alya and Nino still arguing in quiet voices. The low volume somehow made it scarier than if they had screamed.

“Marinette, they have to come along.”, he finally said as he stepped next to her again, his hand finding its way to her waist, “I just talked to Plagg. His intuition never fails and he says we have to bring them along.”

She looked up to him, incredulously, while their friends didn’t notice.

He held their gaze and nodded while a soft breeze brushed through his hair, letting a few strands of blonde bangs streak his forehead.

She hesitated, turning away from him.

“But-… Hawkmoth is dangerous. I don’t-… I don’t really wanna let them come along.”

Adrien nodded and observed Alya and Nino still arguing.

“I don’t want them to either. But I guess I’ll trust Plagg with this one. How about you?”

She bit her lip, still uncertain. Of course, the Kwami were thousands of years old and Plagg was no exception, as childish as he could get. She would have to trust Adrien and Plagg.

“… A-Alright…”, she finally gave in, “Alya, Nino!”

They both spun around and growled at her.

“You’ll both come along. Adrien said you have to. I guess we’ll have to trust him on this one.”

Their jaws went down and Marinette almost saw them crashing to the ground.

“… Really?”, they both asked at the same time.

“Yes, really.”, he girl replied with an eyeroll, obviously not agreeing with the decision. Adrien didn’t either but he also couldn’t help but trust Plagg. Alya immediately went to hug Marinette again.

“Thank you… Thank you… I-I just need to know I could save you if I didn’t back then, when I had the chance. I-… I just want you safe… I’ll stay out of the fight, I promise, but you have to promise the same. Chat Noir can take a critical hit because of his suit, so don’t you try and jump in his line of fire when something like that happens, okay?”

Marinette couldn’t suppress a light snort, placing a little kiss on Alya’s shoulder.

“You’re unbelievable…”

“Hey, wow, wait!”, Nino interjected, “So this decision has just been made now?! I don’t have a say in this!”

Adrien shrugged.

“A god says we need you. I don’t think you have a say in this.”

“But we’ll get two protection vests!”, Marinette now chimed up from her hug with Alya, “I want them both protected.”

Right when she said it, Adrien furrowed his eyebrows.

“But if they’ll get a protection vest you’ll get one, too.”

The girls pulled away again and Marinette shook her head. Immediately, Alya growled but her best friend ignored her.

“I can’t wear one, Hawkmoth would notice immediately with the costume. And then the first shock would lay off too quickly. I need to look like Ladybug, remember?”

Adrien shook his head, grabbing her hand.

“Please, Marinette. He won’t notice. Please, I just-… I need you to wear a vest. It’s a good idea and you need it. I can’t-… Watch you getting hurt, my lady…”

She merely shook her head and smiled, bringing one hand up to caress his cheek before pulling him down for a short kiss.

“I’m sorry, Chaton, but that’s the way it’s gotta be. Believe me, I’d want to wear a protection vest as well but it’s just not possible. If I wear it under the costume it’ll show and above the costume will be obvious. We need every moment in which Hawkmoth is distracted, okay?”

He was about to retort something as she kissed him a second time before falling back on her heels from standing on tip toes.

“And now come on, class has already started.”


	48. Chapter 48

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The calm before the fight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for another filler but the next chapter is gonna be full action ;)  
> We're finally nearing the end of Breeze! I think maybe five more chapters and then we got it!  
> I never thought Breeze would reach into 2018 as well :D  
> Anyway, please enjoy and I promise, the next chapter is gonna be it. The beginning of the end ;)  
> Enjoy~

Alya curled up tighter on Nino’s side, sniffling.

“Please don’t be mad…”, she tried again and he sighed, putting his hand on her shoulder.

“I’m not mad at you, Alya… I mean, I kinda wanna go as well. I wanna make sure Marinette doesn’t get hurt but-… You know how I feel about this.”

The girl pressed her nose tighter against his chest, already feeling new tears pooling up.

“I know… I know we’re in danger, but-…”

“I know.”, Nino interrupted her, turning his head to look at her. She lifted her gaze, reddened eyes meeting his gaze.

He hummed as he sat up a bit more, careful to keep her in this position on his side. As soon as they had gotten to her home they had laid down on her bed, trying to cuddle their concerns away.

And even if they cherished the other’s presence, their worries stayed.

“Listen, Alya, I just want you to stay out of this. I know you tend to run right in and I don’t want you to do that, okay? I’m sorry about what I said in school but I just wanna keep you safe…”

“Then you gotta promise the same.”, she prodded, sitting up more to be closer to him. Her eyes closed again as her nose brushed against his jaw, lightly nudging him. Sometimes it occurred to Nino how similar she seemed to be to Adrien. He loved to nuzzle people as well.

“You gotta promise to stay out of this as well.”

“Of course I will. You know me.”

She sat up further so her face was higher than his now, her lips gently brushing over the almost healed wound he had gotten from the Desertifier incident.

“You gotta promise…”, she sniffled and he gulped, pulling her closer.

“I promise, okay? I promise I won’t do anything stupid.”

Her lips rested against his forehead and they remained like this for a moment before he took her hand, the one on which she had used cataclysm. She lightly recoiled at the pain but didn’t say anything. He turned her hand, inspecting the tiny cuts that never seemed to be able to completely heal. They went out from where she had worn the ring and spread over her palm and the back of her hand, her wrist and about half of her lower arm. Multiple tiny cuts, open but not bleeding. They probably burned all the time.

He leant his head against her lips, sighing as he turned her hand once again.

He couldn’t even count the cuts if he wanted to. If he had to guess he would say it were at least 200 little open wounds, spread over her skin.

She would never, ever get the cat Miraculous again, she had said that. She never wanted to even touch Adrien’s ring ever again. Maybe the love of nuzzling came from the magic that still remained in her body, from the explosion of magic that had been cataclysm.

He brushed over her wrist, recoiling when she twitched and hissed.

“I’m so sorry…”, he finally whispered, his other hand coming up to her neck. He softly pulled her down to his level and guided her mouth to his, giving her a little peck, “I’m so, so sorry you had to go through this for me…”

She merely shook her head, kissing him again. Her hand with the cuts took his, lightly squeezing. It tightened Nino’s heart as he noticed that even this small gesture must hurt for her.

“I would do it again and again and again. A thousand times.”

He sniffled and she shook her head again, leaning in closer so she rested against his chest again.

“But-… But-”

“No buts, Nino Lahiffe. I would do it again, don’t question it. You’re worth it. You’re worth everything.”

 

* * *

 

Marinette gulped, looking down at the box with the Ladybug costume in it.

Alya put a supporting hand on her shoulder, nodding.

Marinette smiled and leaned her head against Alya’s. They remained like that for a bit, enjoying the peace and quiet for a few moments.

“Thanks, Alya.”, she finally whispered, sighing. Less than a week, that’s all they got.

After a few moments Marinette stepped behind the room divider to remove her clothes and put on the costume. Underneath she only wore her underwear now and she really was scared a bit as she felt how thin the material was. She stepped out and turned around for Alya to zip it up. Her best friend stood up from the chair and as she faced her again, the mask attached to her face, the brunette gasped.

“You really are Ladybug.”, she whispered.

“Yeah-… Told you so.”

“And I believed it, but now I can _see_ it!”

Marinette smiled and did a pirouette, but as soon as she was finished, Alya grinned and was about to speak up again but Adrien was faster.

“And you’re still sure about this, my lady?”, Adrien asked uncertainly, standing around in her room a little lost as the two girls talked. Nino laid on the chaise, still trying to wrap his mind around all of this. It had been two days since they had decided to attack Hawkmoth.

“Hell yes I am.”, she replied, brief and firm, as she took some needles from her desk to adjust the costume.

“But what if you get hurt?”, he tried again and she just sent him a scolding glare.

“What if you get hurt?”

At that Plagg chimed up from his little pillow on Marinette’s desk, where Tikki had used to sit.

“Well, he wears a suit. You wear a costume, princess.”

Adrien rolled his eyes, turning to his Kwami who enjoyed another cheese bread.

“Still my nickname for her.”, he growled.

“You have my lady so leave princess to me!”, the tiny god argued.

“No, I wanna have both because she’s mine, _back off_ Plagg.”

The two girls began giggling as Plagg floated up, starting a stare off with his holder. Nino just groaned from his place on the chaise, slumping his arm over his eyes.

“Already so territorial, dude? You’re only kissing her for what, two days now?”

“Almost three!”, Adrien defended himself, crossing his arms, “Besides, don’t act like you and Alya didn’t get together just a bit before.”

Nino merely shrugged as Alya joined him, sitting on the edge of the chaise and putting a hand on his stomach to keep him calm.

“Okay, now that we’ve established that, can we please focus on the plan?”, Marinette stepped out from behind the room divider, the costume in her hands and ready to be adjusted to her measurements, “It’s kinda more important to me to know how we’re gonna attack Hawkmoth rather than what nickname I get from which boy.”

She sent a pointed glare at her boyfriend and the Kwami and they both hurried to sit down. Plagg on his pillow again while Adrien just flopped down on the floor. Marinette nodded, sighing as she took a seat in her chair, beginning to adjust costume by finding out where the new seam had to be.

“Okay, so. I have been to Hawkmoth’s lair a few times in the past weeks and he’s always there when I go take a look so I figured he’s there every evening. That makes it easy to target him since we can attack whenever we want. Plus, he doesn’t expect it and he never noticed me since I stayed out of his view.”

“Quick questions!”, Alya spoke up, her hand having slid up to Nino’s chest but still keeping the connection. As if she had to keep herself grounded, “Uhm, how does Hawkmoth’s lair look? And how are we gonna get in? How did you get in?”

Marinette shook her head, unable to suppress a small grin.

“He really got style… His lair is a bit off the main city and disguised as an observatory. He must either be rich or work there. Or he used this since it kinda looks like it’s abandoned, I don’t really know yet. Anyway, I didn’t get in, everything’s locked. He somehow has to get in using a secret entrance. Or he lives there. I always watched him from the roof of a house in front of the observatory, though.”

Her friends slowly nodded, and while Nino had sat up to sit behind Alya, taking her between his legs and resting his chin on her shoulder, Adrien furrowed his eyebrows.

“How do we get in, then?”

“He has a small window in a big window. I got in as Miss Fortune-”

“Miss Fortune got in. Not you.”, Alya corrected her and a smile snuck onto her lips.

“Right. So, there’s a small window through which Adrien can get us all. Or he could just smash the whole window and bring us all in at once.”

Her boyfriend nodded, grimacing.

“That’d be favorable. I don’t want to leave you guys defenseless to get everyone in.”

Nino agreed to that, tightening his grip around Alya.

“Absolutely, please.”

Marinette let her gaze wander over all of them and felt herself tearing up. They all wanted to come with her to free Tikki. They all wanted to help.

“Thank you… Thank you guys so much…”

 

* * *

 

Their lips touched again, leaving a levitating feeling in his chest as he deepened the kiss.

By now, he rested on his elbow, his hand brushing her hair. His other hand had begun a journey down her body that pressed up against his. He left out the certain areas he was not allowed to touch, but it was exciting enough for him to feel her move underneath him.

Her hands were both in his hair, messing with it, pulling him down to her even more. And he was more than willing to do whatever she was asking him to do for her.

She gasped in his mouth and her nails scraped his scalp, making him almost melt. He always had suspected that he had took over some habits of a cat, patting included.

“I love you-…”, he whispered, under his breath, more to himself and almost inaudible. He assumed she hadn’t heard it, because there came no reaction from her.

Their lips reconnected, almost desperately, as he pushed her tighter against her mattress. Their legs were entangled and their hug was almost too tight for him to let his hands wander.

He needed to feel her, needed to know she was still here, with him. Not in a costume yet, not-… Not in danger. She was here with him, alone in her room, giving all her attention to him.

He needed to know she was whole and as healthy as she could be after these months. But at the same time, he needed to hold her as close as he could.

As they finally parted, they both panted. He untangled his hand from her dark blue hair and locked their gazes, trying to smile but he failed miserably. His face felt numb and he was about to collapse if she planned on continuing to look so damn kissable.

The lights outside reflected in her eyes and she seemed to glow beneath him. A blush had crept up in her cheeks and he couldn’t think of anything but her face, her perfectly formed cheeks and her chin and-…

_Man, I really must’ve fallen hard_ , he thought.

Marinette’s slightly swollen lips were parted and this time he just smiled automatically because she looked so freaking cute. She started to smile too and pulled him down to her again.

They met halfway, their lips longing for each other’s touch, craving for their passion. He had adjusted himself above her, adjusting his legs so that he could take a bit of his weight off of her. She didn’t want that, though. With a swift movement she had pulled his knees out beneath him with her legs, not even once breaking the kiss between them.

His hand found its way back into her hair, pulling it out of her pigtails, spreading it over her mattress. She moaned against his passionate kisses and he couldn’t help but smile a bit. His hand on her middle slipped a bit further beneath the shirt and now cupped her slender waist.

Adrien was completely lost.

He wouldn’t ever wanna be anywhere else, though.

He was kissing his princess, his lady, and she enjoyed it. She lived under his touch and he never wanted her to stop.

She took away all his logic, everything. He couldn’t think straight when she was all over him, sending new waves of anticipation through his body.

Adrien realized suddenly, once again, that they would be fighting side by side in a few days. Like when she had still been Ladybug but-… Different. She was Ladybug, sure, but she didn’t have her old abilities. The girl he loved, he kissed at the moment, they would go up against Hawkmoth.

And she would wear nothing but a costume.

A costume that would hold up against nothing. He swore to himself that he would be her shield, that he would be there for her if Hawkmoth decided to realize she basically wore merchandise.

Their kiss heated, mostly because Adrien feared he wouldn’t ever kiss her again.


	49. Chapter 49

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The fight begins.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late chapter again, the Christmas craziness has really held me up :D  
> Anyway, enjoy~

In order not to attract attention they had agreed to meeting up behind the house in front of Hawkmoth’s lair. Going there in a group would’ve certainly been odd, especially with Marinette. Someone would’ve noticed them.

So they had planned that Alya would go get two safety vests and meet with Nino, Marinette and Chat Noir, who would come there alone. Adrien hadn’t liked the idea of letting Marinette go alone at all so she had suggested that he could also watch over her as Chat Noir. He had begrudgingly given in, silently grateful that Marinette didn’t argue with him. The streets of Paris were still a dangerous place for her, especially in the dark.

The girl sighed as she zipped up the form fitting costume, adjusted by her to look exactly like her magical suit. She eyed herself in the mirror and sighed, biting her lip at how skinny she had become. She hadn’t been the heaviest girl in the class beforehand but now she certainly was the lightest. Her hip bones protruded at the front and when she lifted her arms her elbows looked like deformed balls between two sticks. She had lost too much weight over the last months, that was for sure. Adrien surely would freak out as soon as he saw her in the costume… But one thing was missing.

The most important.

She stepped away from her mirror and to her desk where the mask laid. It had a tiny rubber band to keep it firmly in place and she could easily hide it under her hair. With a comb she parted her hair at the back of her head, making herself a little bun on top so she could easily pull the mask on. Then she let her hair down again and paused before she would start the familiar movements with which she had tied up her pigtails for years over years.

Her fingers trembled when she parted the hair on the back of her head again, sideways this time, mindful of the rubber band. With a practiced training, her hair was tied together in two equal pigtails, feeling like her old self. She squinted her eyes, her mask moving so wrongly as she did so. She grabbed the fake yoyo and put it on her hip, tying it to it’s place. Then she took a deep breath and positioned herself in front of her mirror again, eyes still squinted.

She didn’t know what she expected. Or how she would react.

She remembered the very first time of seeing herself like this, in the same mirror in front of which she now stood. Maybe it would hurt, maybe she would start crying or screaming, or maybe she would even feel proud again. She truly didn’t know.

“C’mon Marinette.”, she whispered to herself, her voice sounding way too much like Tikki’s encouraging words, “You can do this. C’mon.”

As she opened her eyes she had to look away instantly again. In front of her stood Ladybug.

When she slowly looked back again she felt tears pooling up in her eyes but at the same time she didn’t feel different. No, quite the opposite.

It actually felt really familiar. The strange aura, the-… Courage that radiated from her appearance.

She was back.

 

* * *

 

Sneaking past her parents hadn’t been a problem. She had just climbed out onto her balcony, after putting on a big sweater, some jogging pants, shoes and a big cap over her costume, and used the fire escape ladder down to the street. Just a few steps down the street she already felt her boyfriend’s presence, his radiant green eyes watching her from the rooftops. He must’ve waited for her, she noted with a slight smile.

And he never left her unattended. Even if she crossed a bigger street, he was always right above her, watching her closely. She had never felt as safe as she felt now, even with the knowledge of what the evening held for her.

Finally, she arrived at the building where se had told her friends to meet up with her. Instantly, as she stepped into the small gap between the two buildings that stood across of Hawkmoth’s observatory, she heard boots as light as a cat’s feet touching down on the ground. Before she could even turn around his arms were wrapped around her, his nose on her cap.

“I missed you, my lady…”, he mumbled, a quiet purr rumbling against her back. She smirked and snuggled against him, hugging his arms that were tightly locked around her shoulders.

“But I’m back, Chat.”

She felt him recoil and giggled a bit more at how much she must’ve sounded like the old Ladybug just now, teasing and caring. Almost even a bit joyful. He parted and turned her around, his eyes widening at the mask that she wore.

“That-… That looks really convincing…”

Marinette sighed, shrugging lightly as his thumbs brushed over the mask that was strapped to her face.

“Well, if it didn’t it wouldn’t work. So, I made sure it would look okay.”

Chat nodded, pressing his lips together as his eyes wandered down. As if he could see the costume beneath her clothes.

“And you’re sure?”, he asked for the umpteenth time to which she just rolled her eyes, pressing a little kiss to his cheek.

“Yep, absolutely.”

Nino arrived as the third, looking anxious and tense. His hands were buried in the pockets of his jeans and he also stopped at her appearance. After waiting another few minutes for Alya, she finally arrived. Holding out a safety vest to Nino.

His eyes wandered up and down on her, questioning.

“Where’s your vest?”, he asked, not taking the one Alya held out to him. She kept her gaze down, her arm slowly getting tired since the vest was rather heavy.

“They-… They didn’t wanna give me one… Sabrina’s father finally snuck me one but he, uhm-… That the only one he could spare without anyone noticing. I-…”, she sniffled, “I want you to have it.”

“Absolutely not.”, Nino crossed his arms, his expression getting stern, “Or you stay behind.”

“We need to move, people.”, Chat answered instead of Alya, breaking up the fight that was about to start. He wanted to be on the roof and looking out for Hawkmoth as soon as they could.

So, Alya shouldered the vest to climb up the fire escape ladder while Chat merely took Marinette in his arms, using his baton to lift them both onto the flat roof.

Nino followed suit, furrowing his eyebrows as he went. He surely wouldn’t accept the vest from Alya.

 

* * *

 

“Is he still not there?”

“No.”, slowly, Marinette’s fighting spirit faded. They had waited for an hour now and it was getting dark outside. Cold breezes swept over Paris and she shivered in the thin costume. Chat had brought them a few blankets after the wait had gotten a little too long and now they took turns with shifts to watch over the dark building. They were facing the big window and with every minute that went by, the feeling increased that something must be wrong.

“And you are sure-…?”

“Yes, I am sure that everytime Hawkmoth was in there, with or without Akuma attack, the window was open, Chat. I told you several times now and I am not lying.”

“Sorry, m’lady.”, he mumbled.

“I’m sorry, Chat, I-… Chat?”

He had returned to the others already and didn’t hear her anymore. She sighed but stayed laying on the edge of the building overlooking Hawkmoth’s observatory. A little smile played on her lips as she overheard Alya and Nino talking.

“Nino, you should wear that vest. You’ll run in more likely than I will and I don’t want-… Well-… You should wear it, that’s all.”

“What are you, crazy? I won’t let you – keep that vest on, damnit – I won’t let you give it to me. You’ll need the protection because Hawkmoth knows you’re Marinette’s best friend. And even when he’ll be occupied with Chat Noir fighting him, you’ll need to stay protected.”

“But I know you, and I don’t want you to run in and-…”

“Neither do I. And you’ll keep it. Got it?”

“Nino, no! I won’t-…”

“Dude, help me!”

“If Alya would be my lady-…”, the feline hero spoke up and Marinette could already hear the smirk in his voice, “I would never accept that offer. The lady’s need to be protected.”

She heard Nino and Chat laughing and fist bumping while Alya groaned.

“Machos…”, she mumbled.

The bluenette heard rustling and now it was Nino’s turn to groan.

“Keep that vest on, woman. I don’t want it.”

“Nino, please, I-…”

Marinette grinned and got up to walk back to them.

“Alya, I have to stick with Nino in this one. Keep it on, please.”

They looked up as she reached them and snuggled herself beneath the blanket that was draped over Alya’s shoulders. The brunette grumpily laid an arm around her shoulder but didn’t say a word. Thankfully, Marinette felt much warmer in an instant. Nino understood, nodded and got up to watch over Hawkmoth’s lair.

“Chat, I’m sorry. I’m a nervous wreck right now and I guess you are too, so I shouldn’t have been so hard to you. You’re worrying like I am.”

He looked up and nodded smiling.

“C’mere, princess.”

She excused herself from Alya who grinned and pushed her out the blanket. Marinette turned, seated herself in Chat’s crossed legs on his lap and leant her head on his shoulder. He draped his arms around her and held her close.

“Everything’s going to be fine, Mari. We’ll defeat Hawkmoth and he won’t know what happened to him. Alright?”

She sighed again, rubbing her forehead against his neck.

“I’m just-… I’m afraid, to be honest.”, she admitted.

“I know. But don’t be. I’m with you. These two are with you. And Tikki’s gonna be back with you in no time.”

Marinette nodded, taking Alya’s hand she held out for her. They relaxed for a moment, enjoying the quiet.

These could be the last moments, Marinette realized. The last moments she could be held by Adrien, the last moments she could squeeze Alya’s hands. And with a jolt, she remembered that she hadn’t even told her parents goodbye. Tears pooled up in her eyes and she whimpered, pressing herself tighter against Chat.

“I-… I didn’t tell my parents I loved them… I didn’t even tell them that I’m gone. I-… I didn’t even-… All I thought about was sneaking out… I-… Oh gosh, I didn’t tell them goodbye.”

Alya shrugged, brushing over Marinette’s knuckles.

“I didn’t tell mine either. That just means that we won’t let anything happen tonight, doesn’t it?”

Chat pressed a kiss to her temple, nodding in agreement.

“I won’t let anything happen to any of you. I promise.”

She allowed herself to relax and lean back again. They were right. Chat wouldn’t let anything happen and they would return home safe and sound.

Until Nino gasped.

“Guys, guys! The window has opened!”

They all jumped and crawled up to Nino’s spot on the roof. The window had opened and they saw Hawkmoth walking around in the room. He seemed to be talking to something, Marinette assumed, because he paced and used his hands in an excessive manner.

_Was he untransformed?_

_Did he talk to his Kwami?!_

Her eyes went wide and she tried to see more but the room was too dark. She couldn’t see who it was. _If we could see his secret identity…_

“We need to move, quickly! He’s not transformed! We need to see who he really is!”

Chat understood immediately, wrapping an arm around her waist, pulling her closer to him.

“I got you. Nino, Alya, hang on to my back, I’ll break the window and we’ll attack now!”

With that, he extended his baton, smashing a good part of the window in hawkmoth’s observatory. The hero didn’t waste any time, putting his baton to the ground and swinging across the street, with his friends tightly grabbing on to him. Marinette touched her mask, hoping it still was attached. To her relief it was.

They flew through the opened window and Chat landed softly, letting them slide to their feet as they faced him. The breeze of their landing sent a few butterflies fluttering away. Hawkmoth had been fast enough to transform, Marinette realized, and clenched her teeth. Even if they didn’t know his secret identity, they would still fight him.

“Hawkmoth.”, she greeted coldly, her eyes narrowing.

“But, Ladybug, how are you-…! How did you-…!”, the man immediately went into a defensive pose, both his hands firmly on his cane.

She moved a bit, keeping his attention on her and not on Nino and Alya. He was still confused so she could protect them while giving Chat an opportunity to locate her Miraculous.

“Hawkmoth, surrender or else. You’ve got no chance against Chat and me.”

“But-… How were you able to transform?!”, the man growled, bringing his cane closer to his chest. Before he could surge forward, though, because Chat moved to attack immediately. He ran forward and swung his baton, right to hit his face.

A sudden movement flashed before Chat was thrown back. Hawkmoth had drawn a sword out of his cane and had parried his blow. The feline hero slithered back on the floor and held his arm, his face contorted in pain.

“Chat!”

“I’m okay! You stay out of this!”

Chat jumped up and tried a different technique now. He encircled Hawkmoth and constantly extended his baton to hit him. He tried to make him spin around to keep him in sight so that Marinette could search for the Miraculous. She noticed that the man’s suit was flawless, except for one thing. There was a little bulge, right on his chest, that stuck out when he turned and she saw his profile. He must’ve tried to ensure himself that the Miraculous had still been there when she had jumped in and confused him.

“There they are!”, she whispered to Alya, now determined, “I’m going in.”


	50. Chapter 50

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some fights are fought with the heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so this is uhm-... The second one.  
> I'm putting warnings before this one as well and in case SOMEONE doesn't see them I'll make them EXTRA clear.
> 
> TRIGGER WARNINGS (ATTENTION, SPOILER FOR THE CHAPTER):  
> \- Mentions of self harm and suicide  
> \- Mentions of blood  
> \- Injuries  
> \- Possible Character death
> 
> I'm very sorry for the people that have been spoilered through this but SOME people need to see this.  
> So, without further ado!  
> Enjoy >:)

Her best friend shook her head, worried.

“No, Marinette. It’s too dangerous. Let Chat do it, you gotta-”

“He’ll keep Hawkmoth busy. I have to try.”

Alya pressed her lips together and stepped back, giving her room. She bumped against Nino’s chest and looked up to him but he didn’t say anything as Marinette’s gaze shot back to her enemy, narrowing as she continued to analyze him. He was fast but he never seemed to consider a defensive pose. He responded to all of Chat’s attacks with a similar counter attack as a protection.

She would probably have a chance if Chat kept hitting from one side so she could try from behind. He didn’t protect his back by occasionally throwing a glance back because he was too sure he would catch all attacks. If she was fast and quiet enough she could try.

Marinette snuck around her enemy and Chat nodded inconspicuously, keeping Hawkmoth focused on him. She could see in his eyes that he hated what she was about to try but she couldn’t figure out another plan that would keep her safe. She had to take that risk.

Two steps away from him she suddenly leaped and tried to pound on him, surprising him in the process. But he had sensed her.

A striking pain shot up her leg as she tried to avoid the sword but failed. Marinette merely managed a roll not to slam onto the ground with all her weight and came to her feet again, only to be yanked back by Nino who had seen Hawkmoth’s sword coming.

“Thanks, Nino-…”

She clenched her teeth at the pain that still pulsed through her body, but she couldn’t focus on that now. Instead, she watched Chat fencing with the supervillain, while holding on to Nino as he pulled her back a little more. Chat glanced over to her, his glance jumping down. Suddenly, he growled and forced Hawkmoth back, putting more fire in his movements.

“Girl, your leg!”

“It’s only a scratch…”, she played it down before her head snapped up at the incoming danger, “Alya, back off!”

She pushed her friend out of the way as Chat jumped in front of them, only to be hit with Hawkmoth’s sword. He yelped in pain, clutching his other arm. Marinette stopped and stared as the crimson colored liquid dropped out of yet another wound.

“B-But-… our suits are indestructible! Chat shouldn’t be hit _and hurt_.”

“Maybe there’s something special about the sword? Do you guys know anything that does harm against your suits?”, Alya questioned, ripping her blouse to create a pressure bandage on Marinette’s leg while Nino still held her up.

“Something that has to do with the magic of our Miraculous? I don’t know!”

She watched as Chat swung his baton at Hawkmoth’s head, trying to keep him occupied. The man brought his weapons between them, blocking off the hit with his sword and cane crossed, then he pushed Chat back and made him hiss in pain as the cane hit one of his wounds.

“He won’t last long. I _need_ to get my Miraculous!”, Marinette gasped, coming to her feet again as Alya was finished wrapping the bandage.

The brunette frowned, glancing over to Hawkmoth.

“Where are they?”

“I believe he keeps them in an inside pocket on his chest. He wants to have them with him at every moment.”, she reasoned, “And I don’t know how to get them.”

Alya grinned, flexing her fingers as she got up from her knees and rolling her shoulders.

“I think I can get them. If you and Chat are distracting him, that is.”

Marinette scrunched her eyebrows together, shooting a questioning look over to her best friend who stood beside her, studying his movements.

“ _You_ can?”

“You just stay out of the line and try to annoy him or something, girl. I’ll take care of the rest. I’m wearing the vest after all, so I’m relatively safe. Are you able to do that?”

She nodded, closing her eyes as she moved her leg carefully. It just had been a streak, so why did it hurt so much? And why was she way more affected than Chat? He’d had several small cuts by now and he wasn’t struggling too hard.

_Keep it together, Marinette._

“No, Alya, wait-”

“Nino, I know what I’m doing. Please just stay here.”, she heard her best friend say, then she turned to see Nino’s worried expression, “Please.”

He finally, slowly nodded, grumbling.

“Stay safe. Both of you.”

A determined expression dominated Marinette’s face as she rushed past her two friends and swung her fake yo-yo. It was no magical weapon but she was used to attacking with this kind of object and it wouldn’t stop her from taking on him.

A sudden hatred burned inside of her and she snarled, as she hit Hawkmoth in the neck. Of course, it was no critical hit, it wasn’t even enough to make him flinch. But she just needed it as a distraction. Her kick to his sword-arm-shoulder followed and she used his body to push herself back and come to her feet again, using one foot to steady herself by shifting it behind her. She looked up at her enemy, the tall man that she had chased for years by now, and glared at him, readying her fake yoyo again.

Suddenly, Hawkmoth grinned, his mask shifting in his face.

“You’re not transformed.”, he smugly noted and she gulped, “Marinette, isn’t it?”

Her glare vanished and she stumbled back. He still knew her name.

“I’ve got your Miraculous and you’re just wearing what, a costume? Did you really think I would be fooled by that?”

She bared her teeth and tried to hit him again, but he parried her strike with an even wider grin.

“You’re nothing against me. Not like this. You’re a civilian, you’re powerless. You’re weak.”

His voice boomed in her head, throwing her back into these awful months in which she had told herself thee exact things over and over again. She could almost feel the bitter taste or the alcohol in her mouth again, could smell the metallic scent of blood.

“I’m still Ladybug, with or without my mask. Even with a fake one.”, she quickly retorted, frowning at Hawkmoth as he straightened up again, bringing his hands behind his back. It terrified her how unfazed he looked by the fight.

Chat smiled and extended his baton to hit Hawkmoth in the back.

Her arch enemy was forced to take a step forward but didn’t stumble. He looked rather annoyed than in pain. Why was that?

Why weren’t Chat’s blows as powerful as the ones he did with his sword?

Was it because it was sharp? Or an actual weapon?

But Chat’s baton was a weapon too, so why didn’t it harm him?

Her head started aching so she focused on fighting him. Chat and her moved in sync again and even if her body wasn’t as trained as it was in the suit with Tikki’s help, she landed quite a few blows. All the while she tried to stay away from his sword. Her leg was throbbing in pain and she was unsure of how much she could still take.

 _“Cataclysm!”_ , Chat cried out and his fist began to glow in dark sparkles. He leaped and aimed at Hawkmoth’s sword but the man moved aside and instead, a big thunder went through the entire observatory as the blonde’s hand connected with the floor. Somehow, his Cataclysm was way stronger than she had ever seen before, so the whole building shook. She held out her hands to catch herself because the floor trembled and she was afraid she would be too distracted if she fell. A huge crack went through the floor but soon, it stopped. The building cracked and groaned but it still held together.

She straightened up again and was just about to run in once more to attack as a scream sounded behind her. She whipped around, only to find Alya kneeling, clutching her arm. Nino was beside her, watching with a terrified expression as Alya’s arm began glowing out of the multiple tiny cuts she had received when using cataclysm.

Marinette could barely move out of the way as her best friend’s hand touched the floor, causing the building to croak one more time and a piece of debris hitting the floor where she had just stood.

It must’ve been the use of cataclysm that had re-activated the remaining magic inside of Alya, as Plagg had told them. A pulse of magic and Alya would feel it.

The girl looked up with a contorted expression, her arm beginning to bleed. She gave Marinette a small nod, indicating she would be okay.

Marinette returned the gesture, then she spun around to watch Chat again.

He extended his baton just in time to hit Hawkmoth’s sword and it flew out of his hand. Her partner managed to swing his baton for the sword to fly away in a corner of the room, into the semi darkness. Hawkmoth tried to parry the baton with his cane as Chat managed to strike another one, but he failed and it hit him right in the stomach. Growling, he doubled over and suddenly, Alya lunged past her, running to Hawkmoth.

“Alya, stop!”

“What’re you doing?!”

Marinette watched, horrified, as her best friend favored her injured arm but managed to slide her hand into the suit on his chest and snatch a box before the man could react in any way. Still in pain, her best friend ran back to them, just barely escaping Hawkmoths cane. It still hit her on her waist but luckily, she wore the vest so she didn’t even flinch. Alya jumped over the crack in the floor and a pained smile was plastered on her face as she fell to her knees next to Marinette.

“Got them! I got them!”

She handed over the box to Marinette before clutching her arm again.

“Go on, open. I’m-… I’m okay.”, she choked out as Nino came up beside them, placing his hands on her shoulders. They both looked up to Marinette who nodded and let out a relieved sigh as she opened it, seeing her Miraculous in there. Alya allowed herself to lean against Nino and the girl heard her whispering a quiet thank you into his ear. She grinned and was about to put them on as Chat let out an angry cry, surging at Hawkmoth again who had tried to follow Alya to retrieve the Miraculous.

“No!”, her boyfriend yelled, forcing the taller man back, away from his friends. She smiled in relief but gulped as she noticed that Hawkmoth had somehow regained his sword and was more than willing to kill them now.

Chat parried every hit that Hawkmoth tried with a new ferocity, a fire burning in his eyes. His lady had the Miraculous back and she needed at least a few seconds to reunite with her Kwami. He had to buy her this time, he knew how important that was. If he had been in her position, if he had been the one to go through all this pain, he would cherish every little second that he could get with Plagg.

“Girl, snap out of it! Put on your Miraculous, c’mon!”

Her confused gaze met Alya’s and she nodded.

“Yeah, yeah right-…”

She shook her head, trying to push back her worries for her boyfriend. For now, she needed to concentrate on transforming and finally helping him. She handed the empty box over to Alya and put on her earrings. They glowed and Tikki shot out of them, a little dazed.

“Marinette! Marinette, no, don’t!”, the Kwami cried, a wild expression in her eyes, “Please, you gotta reconsider and-”

She looked around, confused to not be in her wielders room anymore. Her eyes met Marinette’s and she tilted her head.

“Where’s the Akuma? And why are you not akumatized, but instead transformed? And what am I doing here when you’re transformed? Wait, is that a costume?!”

The questions fell from the Kwami’s lips faster than Marinette could follow. But she didn’t care. Instead, she cupped her hands around Tikki’s tiny body and pulled her to her cheek, hugging her gently. Her Kwami reached out her paws and embraced her the best she could as sobs began shaking the frail girl.

Months of being abandoned by friends and family, months of missing her friend, and Marinette felt it all breaking down above her. She felt how her heart got stitched together and broke all over again at how weak she had been, at how terribly she had failed. She had given her Miraculous to Hawkmoth, she herself, because she had been too slow. She had forced Tikki back into her Miraculous because she had been too upset and too stupid, she had given her friend into a prison that she hadn’t been able to escape from.

She had failed so miserably but she finally had her back and she felt the relief washing over her like a forceful wave, leaving her body violently trembling and shaking in sobs.

Everything in her broke and healed at the same time as she held her Kwami tighter, as she sobbed and nuzzled Tikki’s head. She would give her all the cookies she had, she would never let her out of her eyes again. She would never, ever, let anyone take Tikki away from her. She wouldn’t ever allow herself to lose her friend again. To disappoint her so massively.

“What happened, Marinette? And why do you look like you’re suddenly thinner – even more so than before?”

Wet, hot tears dropped down her face as she felt her little Kwami moving against her cheek, after months of missing her and only imagining how it felt.

“Tikki, I am so glad, I-… I really missed you…”

Her Kwami looked up, confusion obvious in her expression.

“Marinette, what’s going on? And-… where are we? Why is-… Why are Alya and Nino there and-… Why is Chat Noir fighting against Hawkmoth?!”

Marinette sighed, softly kissing her Kwami’s little head, her heart suddenly feeling so light as she listened to her friend’s voice again.

“I-… I was akumatized and-… I was forced to give you up to Hawkmoth. That’s-… It’s months back. Everyone thought I had killed Ladybug and-… I-I was alone and started stupid things and-…”

“Wh-What?!”, her Kwami parted from her and her eyes jumped down Marinette’s body in horror, “Are these bandages on your arms?! And-… You’re so thin, Marinette! A-Also, why’re you so pale and-… Sick looking?! What did I miss?!”

“A lot, Tikki.”, she sighed, biting her lip, “I-… I was depressive and-… I started drinking and cutting myself and-… I t-tried…”

“No…”, her Kwami quickly reconnected with her cheek and Marinette felt her sobbing now as well so she once again held her tightly, “… No… No… Oh, Marinette, I’m so sorry… I’m so, so sorry, I-”

“No, I’m so sorry, Tikki. But, I’m afraid I’ll have to explain that to you after we-”

Alya beside her as well as Chat in front of Hawkmoth suddenly screamed. Her gaze shot up and she saw Chat pressing his baton against Hawkmoth’s cane above his head while the man’s other hand with the sword was snapping forward, aimed at his heart. She was about to warn him because he looked away, towards them, but within the next moment she understood why Alya and Chat were yelling in the first place.

“NINO, _DON’T_!!!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Special thanks to my good friend and adopted little tumblr-sister orangebunnit for working together with me on the picture!  
> This is our first collab picture and I did the lineart while she colored it.  
> It looks really awesome, thank you so much! <3


	51. Chapter 51

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And finally, the fight is over.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nearing the end ;)

Nino threw himself between the feline superhero and their arch enemy, determined to take the blow for him. The worst was, that Hawkmoth hadn’t swung his sword but stabbed.

With a sickening sound, the weapon went through his shirt and chest, before coming out on Nino’s back again.

The teenager gulped and tried to create a sound but instead, blood spluttered out of his mouth and dyed his blue shirt with red dots, creating a gruesome pattern on his chest.

Hawkmoth pulled out his sword and stumbled back, his eyes wide. He obviously hadn’t expected that. Chat caught Nino and lifted him up, bringing him to the two girls. Immediately, Alya fell to her knees as the blonde laid him down to the floor. The building groaned and Marinette froze as Alya shifted closer to Nino, her sobs already getting loud.

“Nino! You idiot, Nino, how did you think you-…!”, Alya cried out, pressing her hands to his wound. He just smiled, lifting a hand to her cheek to catch a tear.

“… So-… ry-…”, he breathed, baring his teeth.

“Don’t talk, you big idiot! You idiot! Fuck, how could you do this to me?! I told you to take the vest, damnit! Why, why did you have to say no, huh?!”

Hawkmoth took another step back, shocked. Chat didn’t attack him again, instead he fell to his knees next to his best friend as well, tears already streaming down his cheeks.

“Tikki-…”

“It’s okay, Marinette-…”, her Kwami caressed her cheek, eyes wide, “Just say the words.”

_“Spots on!”_

In a flash of long missed sparkles, she was Ladybug again. After all the months she finally felt the real suit coating her body, stretching over her form and giving her back the old strength.

All the worries, all the concerns, made way for a satisfying feeling of power, of a chance.

With a stern expression, she unclipped the yo-yo and walked towards Hawkmoth. He had straightened himself again and held his sword, ready to fight even though his expression still spoke of horror. The observatory loudly complained and a few parts of the dome crashed down beside her, sending breezes of dust flying through the room.

“Now we’ve finally got a real competition, haven’t we?”, he tried sounding strong but his voice shook.

“You will pay now.”, Ladybug growled, her eyes hard and unmoving on his, “You will pay for all that you did. You will regret becoming a Miraculous wielder and you will cry for mercy when I’m finished with you. And I won’t hold back.”

Ladybug swung her yo-yo and hit him on the side of his head. He cried out, more of frustration than of pain, but it was satisfying.

“You will never harm any innocent people again. You will pay for making my friends, me, and everyone else suffer. You will wish I never agreed to your deal and you will pay for hurting Nino!”

She hit him blow after blow and she saw fear in his eyes, a view she had long craved for.

“I had to go through all this emotional and physical pain because of you! I had to cry countless tears because of a simple lie! I was helpless and alone and it was all because of you!”

Hawkmoth tried to parry her strikes but he was too slow. She again and again let her yoyo lash out on him but never went for the critical blow. Oh no, she wanted to enjoy this.

“Nino-… Nino, please-… Open your eyes…”, she heard Alya behind her as she cornered Hawkmoth, not even giving him the time to use his sword or cane to block her attacks. Alya’s sobs and Chat’s silent sniffling gave her an anger she had not known she could possess.

Fire raged in her eyes as she once again hit Hawkmoth’s chest, growling as he coughed.

“You will regret everything you did. You will wail and whine for my mercy but I will not grant it to you. You’re a disgusting man and so you deserve what I give you now.”

“You-… You don’t understand!”, he tried but she cried out, finally moving in for close combat. Her fists pounded down on him and made him shut up.

“I do understand! You’re a pitiful being! You’re a power-hungry asshole. You’re dirt to my feet!”

Suddenly, he felt the wall of his observatory in his back and his gaze frantically searched for an escape.

_“Lucky Charm!!”_

A knife fell into her hands and she immediately knew what to do with this one. No uncertainty, no unnecessary thoughts. He was right before her and he was afraid. She had the chance to make him pay now.

It would be so easy to let the knife come down and slit his throat. It would be so easy to let it sink into his chest and watch the life draining out of his eyes. It would be so satisfying to have him die in front of her.

“Nino, please-… Please come back to me! Don’t-… Don’t leave me, c’mon-…!”

She heard the sobs of her best friend echoing through the room. Her voice cut through Ladybug’s adrenaline rush and made her hesitate. Her hand with the knife in it sunk a bit, losing all exertion.

Hawkmoth grinned and pushed his sword into his cane, gathering his butterflies around him. A cloud of white butterflies rushed past her, creating a rustling breeze, towards the window.

And with a quiet laughter, he was gone.

Ladybug let her arm sink further and her shoulders slumped. She turned around only to see her best friend and her partner gathered around Nino who laid on the ground motionless, not showing any sign of life.

She ran over to them and got to her knees, gently pulling at Alya’s blouse.

“I need this. Okay?”

Her best friend didn’t even hesitate one moment as she pulled off her blouse and gave it to Ladybug. Chat moved over to her and placed a hand on her back.

“What are you doing? And where is Hawkmoth?”

“He fled. I got this knife as a Lucky Charm and I know what to do now. There’ll be a chance to take on Hawkmoth in the future but right now, we need to save Nino and I need to fix this building before it’ll go down above us.”

She was finished cutting Alya’s blouse into stripes and began to do a pressure bandage on his chest, right above the wound. Then, she brought the blade beneath Nino’s nose, testing if it steamed up. Her hands trembled but she almost cried out in relief as the blade became dull because of the breeze of his breath.

“He’s still alive!”

With a smile in her face, she stood up and threw the knife in the air and cried out the two words she had missed so often in these months.

_“Miraculous Ladybug!”_

The knife vanished and instead, the magical cleansing light flashed out. She watched it escape through the window, off to fix everything that had happened since her attack, because she hadn’t used it for so long. All her good luck, all her magic that had stored up until this moment since she had removed her earrings on that fateful day. More and more cleansing light streamed out through the window and fixed every injury and every damage that had happened during Akuma attacks.

The last bit of the magical light went down to circle her and Nino. It brushed over her arms and stomach, fixing every action and every aftermath that had been caused because of the attack of Miss Fortune. Suddenly, the building stopped to collapse and built itself up again. The crack in the floor vanished and she felt better with every passing second. It was the most powerful cleansing light she had ever seen, creating a rushing breeze inside the dome, and she was glad everything was being put into its place again. The light vanished and left her standing there with slightly brushed back hair. She breathed heavily, trying to process everything that had happened.

And with a gasp, Nino awoke.

 

* * *

 

Alya threw her arms around his neck and sobbed even harder. Confused, he held himself up on one elbow, the girl laying on top of him. He wrapped an arm around her shoulders and looked up to Ladybug who had her gaze fixated on her arms.

“Wh-… What happened? Why is Alya crying?”

“Lift your shirt, man.”, Chat said calmly but with a shaking undertone to his voice.

“Why, dude?”, he asked, confusion written over his face.

“Because you got stabbed, now show me.”

“I got-…?!”

Chat rolled his eyes and pulled up Nino’s shirt. Not even a scratch was to be seen on his smooth skin, no sign of a deadly injury. The wound on his forehead where Chat had scratched him on the Desertifier-incident had also vanished. His eyes went wide and he looked at the feline hero.

“Man. Dude.”

Chat faced him and tilted his head.

“What?”

Nino leant over to him, whispering in his cat ear loud enough for everyone to understand.

“There’s nothing, man!”

Ladybug finally allowed a little giggle to escape her throat and even Alya had calmed a bit. Nino grinned and laid back down on the floor, hugging her tighter now. They were completely lost in their embrace so Chat smiled and looked over to the female hero, his partner.

“Hey, are you okay?”

She looked up but didn’t meet his gaze, a little smirk playing around her lips.

“Yeah, I’m fine. I think, my cuts just vanished. My arms-… And my stomach-… Everything feels different, more-… Healthy. I don’t know, it just feels-… Innocent?”

“That’s because you are, princess.”

She laughed and faced him fully now.

“What’s it going to be? ‘My lady’ or ‘princess’?”

He grinned even more and got to his feet, pulling her into a tight embrace.

“I don’t know, what do you prefer?”

“Both.”, she mumbled into his soft, blonde hair, inhaling his calming scent.

They just stood like this for a moment, enjoying each other’s presence.

A few moments later, Chat’s ring beeped.

“We should charge up, kitty.”, Ladybug whispered, not wanting to let go.

He nodded, rubbing his cheek against her head.

“We really should…”, he kissed her hair and she flinched.

Green sparkles flashed around him and he felt the magic leaving his body. A breeze swept through Ladybug’s dark blue hair and she smiled as Adrien stood in her arms now, shakily grinning down to her. Now he felt how exhausted he really was. He hadn’t used Cataclysm since the Akuma before Miss Fortune and this time it had been very powerful. Quickly, he caught Plagg behind her back who shot out of his ring, way more exhausted than Adrien felt, probably.

The Kwami laid in his hand, eyes closed.

“Plagg? Plagg?!”, Adrien asked worriedly.

“Cheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeseeeeeeeee-…”, Plagg groaned and the blonde smiled. He would be fine.

Ladybug giggled one more time, slightly parting from Adrien to brush over the tiny cat’s head.

“You’ll be fine, Plagg.”

Adrien meanwhile stared at her, his eyes wide. This was her, this was Ladybug. Suddenly, with the suit, he really understood that she was back. She was back.

“Can I kiss you?”, he asked, as if he was in a daze.

Her body froze and slowly, she leant back. Her gaze met his and furrowed her eyebrows at his lovestruck stare, tilting her head. Only then she seemed to understand how he must feel now.

She slowly breathed in and out, creating a warm breeze that brushed over his neck, and he felt like his knees were pudding. She didn’t answer, like last time. She just nodded.

So, he placed a small kiss on her lips, sweet and innocent as if he kissed an angel.

They parted in a flash of pink sparkles and in front of him stood Marinette still in her Ladybug costume, furiously blushing as she now understood, too, what this all meant. She was back with her partner.

Her partner was now her boyfriend.

As her magic left her too and Tikki flew out of her earrings, he held her close to prevent her from falling. Her Miraculous had been inactive for months and she had an equally powerful Lucky Charm so he assumed it must’ve been way harder for her. The exhaustion caused her knees to give way and he gently let her slip to the floor, never breaking their locked gazes.

“Are you okay, princess? C’mere, let me take this for you.”, he removed the mask of the costume and finally, he was able to fully see her again, as Marinette. The girl behind the mask.

“Thanks. Yeah, I-… Oh, Tikki!”

She looked down at her hand in which she had caught her exhausted Kwami, worriedly glancing around him to Alya and Nino, waving her best friend to come closer.

“Hi Tikki. I’m Adrien. Or, well, Chat Noir. Plagg’s Miraculous wielder.”, he smiled and held a finger in front of the little Kwami.

The little red and black spotted goddess grinned tiredly and took it, nodding.

“Hi. I’m glad to finally meet you, Adrien.”

Adrien bowed his head and his smile grew. He liked Tikki instantly.

“Wait, I’ve brought cookies for you. You’ll be fine in no time.”, Marinette fuzzed, taking the bag from her best friend and taking out the goods for the Kwami.


	52. Chapter 52

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The end is near.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, we're obviously nearing the end.  
> Don't be sad, the fanfic's been going on for long enough ;P And it's not entirely over yet!  
> Enjoy~

Alya handed over the cheese and the cookies to the two Miraculous wielders, without another word. Her gaze immediately shot back to Nino, scanning him up and down for injuries for what seemed to be the thousands time. Her hand brushed over his chest and he smiled from his half sitting, half lying position. She tried, she really tried smiling back but the corners of her mouth slid down again, leaving room for another little sob. He brought the hand on which he didn’t prop himself up on the floor, up to hers, pulling it away from his chest where Hawkmoth’s sword impaled him, interlacing their fingers.

“It’s okay, promise.”, he whispered, smiling. The wound n his forehead had vanished as well, as she noticed now, “I’m okay.”

Alya sighed and leant down to him, burying her face on his neck. He chuckled, sitting up a little to hug her. She still fought against her tears, sniffling from time to time.

“I-… I thought-… I had lost you…”, she admitted once again, her arms sneaking around his waist to reconnect on his back again, one hand tightly gripping the other wrist, “I-… When-… When Adrien brought you here… When you-… When you lost your consciousness… And-…”

He hugged her tighter, pressing a little kiss on her ear.

“I’m here, Alya. I’m okay. Don’t think about it. We’re okay.”

“You-… Your eyes and-… The b-blood… You-… You were convulsing-… And I-I didn’t know what to do-… And-…”

“Shh, Alya…”, he gently swayed her from side to side, pulling her a bit down so she could rest her ear on his chest, to hear his beating heart, “I’m here. I’m alive.”

She sobbed, pressing herself tighter against him. He brushed over her back, adjusting so he could finally pull her into his lap. She curled herself up against his chest and he sighed, looking up to meet Adrien’s and Marinette’s gaze. They helplessly responded with a shrug and Nino indicated through his expression that he didn’t know what to do either.

Tikki and Plagg sat on the floor and as soon as their chosen ones were sure they were taken care of, Adrien copied their friends pose with Marinette. She blushed as he wrapped his arms around her, his legs folded beneath her. Then she felt him lift her chin, placing a little kiss on her lips. She was already tempted to melt into the kiss as she understood he was suggestion this to Nino, to get Alya out of her shock. When she looked over Nino shrugged, then cupped Alya’s cheek. Adrien and Marinette turned to each other again, to give them a bit of privacy, then Marinette spoke up.

“We need to discuss this.”, she stated.

“I would rather _chat_ about it.”, a grin countered her serious expression and she couldn’t help but giggle.

“Oh, of course you would, kitty.”

“You know me, my lady. I love to _bug_ you.”

She laughed and they enjoyed their first relatively normal moment together. Adrien realized that it had been his first pun in months since then.

He nuzzled his face against her neck and even when she flinched slightly, still, a few moments later two small arms wandered up to wrap themselves around his shoulders. The blonde smiled, holding her close. A few moments later, Alya and Nino had parted and shifted closer, joining them in the hug.

“So, what’re you guys gonna do now?”, Alya asked. Her voice was still shaky and her hands still searched for Nino’s warmth but she already looked much better than before.

“We still have a few Akumas to purify. So I need Adrien to bring me to them. He told me he stored them somehow.”, internally, she groaned. He hadn’t wanted to tell her where or how he had stored them, fearing she would try something without her Miraculous. Or even get too close to them. He could really be overprotective.

“You sure you wanna do that today?”

“Of course. I need to fix this. When Tikki’s up to it, I’ll do it.”

The little Kwami seated herself on Marinette’s leg, quickly followed by Plagg who sat down beside her, not breaking their touch, hugging her protectively with his tiny paws. Tikki just smiled and shook her head at that but turned to face Marinette.

“I can do it, because when we’re transformed we’ll both have much more energy together.”

“And what if I won’t let you because I don’t want you to overwork yourself?”, Plagg murmured grumpily.

“Then I won’t listen to you, you big baby.”, she giggled.

“Hey, I’m just worrying!”

“Yeah, well you don’t have to, Plagg. It’s alright. Besides, Marinette and I need to set a few things right again.”

He buried his face on her neck, not moving any more than necessary.

“Plagg you’re being ridiculous. I love you and all, but now you’re just acting childish.”

“Maybe. But I have all right to do so because I don’t want my girlfriend to be sick.”

“Your-… You are _a thing_?!”, Marinette exclaimed, obviously not having known this before.

“… Maybe?”

Marinette’s eyes were wide open as she looked up at Adrien who just shrugged, grinning. In an instant, she pouted.

“And _you knew?_ ”

“Yeah, kinda-… Plagg told me already, it slipped him. But that was, uh-… A little back.”, he sheepishly ran a hand through his hair. The bluenette’s mouth hung open and she looked back to Tikki. It took her a moment to get her thoughts straight again and she cast it off, shrugging.

“Anyways, Tikki? You ate up? How’re you feeling?”

“Better, thanks Marinette.”, her Kwami smiled warmly, “We can go. But I need to warn you, it’s going to be even more exhausting for you. Maybe you want to-…”

“No, it’s fine Tikki. As long as it won’t affect you even more.”, she smiled.

“I can take it. Let’s go and get it done.”, she placed a small kiss on the little Kwami’s head and looked up to Adrien who nodded.

“Well then, Alya, Nino, time to get you two back home. We have school tomorrow.”

“Of course, Papa.”, his best friend got up smirking and pulled Alya and Marinette to their feet, “Oh and thanks, bro.”

“For what?”, Adrien took his hand and let the boy hoist himself up, “ _I_ should be thanking _you_. You took that blow for me. I could’ve died.”

He grinned and fist bumped him.

“No problem. But really, I-”

Alya rolled her eyes.

“Boys, you’re both equally pretty. Can we go now?”

Marinette grinned and wrapped an arm around Alya’s waist.

“We can let them alone for a sec, don’t you think? ‘Cuz you’re going with me.”

They both laughed and as Marinette transformed, Alya squealed. Ladybug shot her a look with one eyebrow cocked up, questioning her reaction with a gaze.

“I’m still not used to you being a superhero. Sorry!”

Adrien transformed too, pulling Plagg away from his cheese. With a groan, the Kwami vanished into his ring.

“Ready to go, bro?”, Chat Noir asked, rolling his shoulders.

“For you always, bro.”, Nino replied, smirking.

“Bro.”

“He literally just almost died and now they’re already deeply in love again, I don’t believe it.”, Alya rolled her eyes. Ladybug imitated her move and threw her yoyo out the window to hoist them away. Chat and Nino followed them, both snickering.

After a short race, Alya and Nino were both home.

The two superheroes met on the roof in front of the Agreste Mansion again.

“You stored them here? How? And you didn’t tell me you had them here?”

“Turns out, my bell can capture Akumas and I can release them inside a jam jar again. They don’t multiply when they’re inside the glass, so I assumed they couldn’t when they’ve got no room. Or maybe butterflies, the animals, are just powerless against jam jars. Maybe it’s got to do with Hawkmoth’s animalistic tendencies.”, she nodded, hesitating, “What’s up, princess?”

“I’m just-… I don’t know what’ll happen when I purify them. What’ll happen-… To me-… When I purify the Akuma that created Miss Fortune?”

He ran a soothing hand up and down her back and gestured towards the big windows of his room.

“The third one from the right is opened. After you, my lady.”

“Alright.”

She swung her yoyo and dashed through the air, a cold wind caressing her face, and into Adrien’s room. Chat landed right beside her and walked into his bathroom, getting a medical kit. He then de-transformed and nursed the most of his cuts. She released her transformation as well, bandaging the wound on her leg. He then got up, transformed again, probably for safety, and went to his wardrobe, to sort out a few jam jars with each one containing a dark, rapidly fluttering butterfly. He put out almost thirty of these, holding one of them back.

“This one is yours. You wanna do this one first?”

She shook her head, already transformed again, trembling as she watched the dark butterfly closely. She rubbed the spot on her arm where she had hidden the former scars under her costume. The two halves of her bracelet that she hid on her other arm beneath the fabric pressed comfortably against her skin.

“No, this one’s the last. Release the others first.”

 

* * *

 

It took them at least an hour to purify each and every one of them. She already felt worn out, even with still wearing the suit, but she didn’t want to take a break. She needed to put everything in its place again.

After the twenty-fifth Akuma, she fell to her knees. Chat rushed to kneel beside her and felt her forehead.

“I won’t let you continue. You’re burning up, Mari.”

“No-… It’s fine. Release the next one.”, she tried reassuring him with a slight smile but he didn’t buy it.

“Marinette, you’re exhausted. Today was a long day and you’re too tired to even stand on your own feet.”

“Then I’ll sit. Please, Chat, I need to do this.”

He looked like he wanted to object but she placed a little kiss on his cheek.

“Please?”, she begged, hopeful. Chat rolled his eyes and groaned, then finally gave in.

“After that you’ll rest. Either I’ll carry you to the bakery or you’ll call your parents and tell them you’re sleeping here. But you won’t transform or walk home alone, understood?”

She caressed his cheek and smiled.

“Of course, worried kitten. Just let me finish this.”

He slowly nodded and moved over to open the next jam jar. She captured the Akuma and purified it. It went on like this until the next-to-last was escaping through Adrien’s window.

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah-… Just let me-… breathe for a moment-…”

“Did I release them too fas-”

“It’s alright, kitty. You did-… Nothing wrong.”

He sat down beside her, spinning the jar in his hands. The Akuma inside had calmed down, only flapping slowly and irregularly now. She leaned against him, almost dozing off.

“We don’t need to do this now, Mari. We can purify this one tomorrow.”

“Noo-… Release it, I’m ready-…”, her words already slurred because she was so sleepy.

He shook his head, grinning.

“You can’t even capture it when your eyes are too droopy to even stay open.”

She rubbed over her face, standing up again.

“No, I-… I need to do this now. I can’t sleep letting it still be corrupted.”

He forced himself to his feet too and smiled at her.

“You’re so brave. _So_ brave.”

She leaned against his lips that he pressed on her forehead, steadying her with a supporting arm.

“You want me to hold you to purify it?”

Weakly, she nodded and he unscrewed the jar, letting the Akuma fly out into the air. She opened her yoyo and threw it after the dark butterfly, capturing the Akuma in the process. It glowed shortly and after a few moments, she opened it again, letting the white butterfly escape to its well-deserved freedom.

Right after that, she sighed and slumped against him.

“Tikki, _Spots off_.”

Tikki shot out of her earrings and Chat caught the Kwami in his one hand while he gently let Marinette slip to the floor.

“Mari, you okay? Mari? Should I call your parents?”

“Yeah-… I’m-… Okay-… Don’t worry-… And my parents-… Think-… Sleeping-…”, she yawned and curled up against him, even this movement costing much of her left-over energy.

“So you wanna stay here and I’ll get you back early or you wanna go home now?”

“Would-… Love to stay-… But need-… To get home-… Please-…”

He nodded, scooping her up in his arms. She snuggled up against him and he laid Tikki on her stomach.

“You’ll be okay, Tikki? Can I let you stay there?”

“I’ll be fine, just get her home. I’m a little worried…”

He smiled, trusting the little Kwami to hold on while he jumped out of the window. After a short ride, they arrived at her balcony just a few minutes later. She sighed and woke up just as he opened the hatch that lead down to her room. Tightly holding on to her, he carefully carried her down onto her bed and lifted the blanket to drape her under it.

She wouldn’t let go, so he smiled and laid down next to her, laying her costume mask on a shelf above her bed, placing a little kiss on her head.

“Plagg, _Claws in_.”, he whispered, wrapping an arm around her covered shoulders, “You okay, princess?”

He gave Plagg the bit of cheese he had been wanting to eat in Hawkmoth’s lair and his Kwami vanished down to her desk where Tikki had flown off earlier, probably to get some more cookies.

“Yeah-…”, she mumbled, her eyes already falling close.

He kissed her on the forehead again and she slightly smiled, too tired to do more.

“Do you-… Are you-… Okay, too?”, she sleepily asked.

“Yes.”, he replied shakily, realizing once more that this was his lady, the girl he had been in love with for years now, “We’re both okay. And together. We’re okay, Mari, and we have Tikki back. And you were amazing today.”

“Good… Good… Everyone safe…”, she whispered, half-asleep.

He grinned, placing yet another kiss on the tip of her nose.

“Everyone is safe, don’t worry.”

She had fallen asleep already, curled up into a ball and her knees resting against his chest. He enjoyed her warmth and her cute face. Suddenly, Tikki flew up to her bed and looked after Marinette.  
“Is she sleeping?”

He nodded and his grin was so broad it almost hurt.

“She asked me if I was okay! She’s so adorable!”, he voicelessly squeaked. Tikki smiled too. Plagg floated next to her the following moment, quietly laughing.

“And, what did you answer? That you love her instead of acting normally?”

But he was too occupied of her face to react to Plagg’s teasing.

After fifteen minutes, Tikki kicked them out, commanding them to go home and get a good night’s sleep too. Adrien knew he needed to, but he didn’t want to leave Marinette alone. Though… He’d see her in school tomorrow.


	53. Chapter 53

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The next day after the big comeback.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the new chapter! Only one more and Breeze will be over! ;)  
> At this point I wanted to take the opportunity and thank you all. Thank you guys so much for all your support, for all your comments and views and most of all, for reading. This project really means a lot to me and I never coud've done it without the comments praising my work or the just as valuable critique I got to grow on.  
> Thank you guys so, so much. It's been a pleasure working together with all of you <3  
> Now I just gotta make one announcement:  
> We have someone who likes to comment a lot. And dude, Spamposteur, while I appreciate that you wanna boost my story's comment count, I'd like it even more if you wouldn't use "Lol", numbers or Justin Bieber's outdated lyrics :D  
> Anyway, I'd like to ask from all the other commenters around here not to answer to him. He might be forced to add even more than 10 comments on a chapter and I think that would really overchallenge him.  
> Just don't answer to him, okay?  
> 

The next day, Adrien awoke with a smile.

A big smile.

They had kicked Hawkmoth’s ass, Ladybug was back in business, every Akuma that had left him sleepless because of the _constant fluttering_ that had come from his wardrobe was purified and finally, _finally_ , he and his lady were together. The day couldn’t start any better.

He practically floated through the Mansion, irritating Nathalie in the process. Seeing him so happy after months of misery was probably something she wouldn’t have expected

But he didn’t care.

He was deep in dreams and almost didn’t realize it was getting late. When he jumped into the car and drove up to his school, he saw Alya walking up the stairs together with Rose and Juleka towards Nino who waited for her at the top. The girls happily chatted away and Nino smiled watching Alya.

As fast as Adrien could, he scrambled out of the car and barely grabbed his bag before he ran to them.

“Nino, Alya!”, he shouted. His friend turned and a big smile spread over their faces. He firstly hugged Alya who came running down the stairs again to greet him. Then he parted from her to wrap his arms around his best friend. This morning was just starting to be perfect.

The realization of what they had accomplished, of what they had been through, now really got through to their minds and they were just starting to see that it was all true.

But still, someone was missing.

“Hey, have you seen Marinette yet?”, he asked Alya as he pulled away from Nino, just earning a shrug from the girl.

“No, not yet. Apparently, she’s sleeping in again, huh?”, she laughed and Adrien grinned, a humorous twinkling in his eyes.

“I’ll go get her. You can go ahead.”

“We’ll wait here.”, Nino chimed in, his arm finding its way around Alya’s waist. She giggled, nodding.

“After all we wanna see the hero on the first day after her comeback before everyone else.”

The blonde chuckled, showing them a thumb up.

“Alright, I’ll hurry!”

 

* * *

 

Sabine stood on the counter when he entered the bakery, a big smile on her face.

“Hello, Adrien! You look happy today!”

In response he smirked, going around the counter to hug her as well. The small woman was surprised at first but then he felt her warm hands on his back.

“Yes, Madame Cheng. I feel way better. Is Marinette upstairs?”

She rolled her eyes and nodded, a smile still lingering on her face, indicating she wasn’t mad. He winked, nodding with a knowing expression.

“I’ll get her up before school starts.”

“Please do that Adrien. I swear, if she picks up her old sleeping habits again-…”

He laughed throatily at that, knowing exactly Marinette would pick up on them again. The job of a hero was never done.

“I’ll make sure she’ll get up early enough in the future.”

Adrien walked through the bakery, waving to Tom, before climbing up the stairs. Marinette wasn’t in the kitchen or bathroom, nor could he notice any signs that she’d had breakfast yet. With a small sigh and a grin, he walked up the stairs to her room, brushing his hair out of his face as he reached the hatch and opened it to look up to the loft where Marinette’s bed was on.

“Princess, wake up! You’ll be too late for school otherwise!”

A groan came back and he laughed, fully going upstairs now before climbing up the ladder to her bed. There she was, beneath the sheets, grumbling while Tikki sat on her head, helplessly shrugging.

“I’ve been trying to get her up but it’s useless, Adrien.”, she quickly floated up as a lazy hand swatted after her before pulling the blanket over her head again. He chuckled, crawling onto the mattress next to her.

“C’mon, my lady, you gotta get up. We can take a nap in the lunch break, okay?”

She responded with another groan, her eyes still firmly squeezed shut. He smirked, laying down beside her.

“Marinette.”, another groan, “Do I have to pull an Alya?”

Immediately, she sat up, her arms outstretched and her face contorted with shock as well as disgust.

“No water! Please, no water!”, she cried out, before looking around. The first she saw were Adrien’s legs and as she turned around further her gaze finally met his, his expression very close to bursting with laughter.

“… You’re an idiot.”, she commented, furrowing her eyebrows since the light was a little too bright for her.

He finally snorted and laughed, sitting up and kissing her cheek.

“Don’t worry, I won’t get water. You can just be glad I’ll be the one waking you from now on, instead of Alya.”

“You’re an idiot and she’s mean…”, Marinette slurred, her voice still thick from sleep. With lazy movements she pushed Adrien down on her mattress, then laid back down and snuggled up to his chest, “Stupid idiot with stupid puns and a stupid face…”

He laughed at her indignant tone, brushing over her hair.

“Aw, princess. You love me.”

He got a grumbled sound back that almost sounded like agreeing but he honestly wasn’t too sure.

“… Stupid water… Stupid… Stupid school…”, she mumbled, her voice getting sleepier and sleepier by the moment.

“Hey, wow, princess? Did you just take me hostage to sleep longer?”

As she looked up to him with bed hair and a half awake but still mischievous expression on her face he fell in love all over again, even if she had just confirmed what he had asked her.

“… Maybe?”, she finally responded and he shook his head, rolling over so that he could sit her up with him.

“Nu-uh. Get up, c’mon.”

“But I don’t wanna!”, she whined, trying to hold on to him as he took her to the edge of the bed, “Please Adrien, I wanna sleep!”

He laughed as he took her in his arms, climbing down the ladder with her. She automatically held on to him to make it easier and he grinned as his feet touched the floor.

“Yeah, don’t we all wanna sleep? So, get dressed, I’ll have Tikki watching over you while I wait for you downstairs. And don’t you dare go back to bed again.”

She grumbled as he let her down to her feet, then she tightly wrapped her arms around his waist.

“Please don’t go…”, she whispered. His grin slipped from his lips and he hugged her back, burying his nose in her hair.

“I won’t go, Mari.”, he mumbled after a moment, feeling her trembling, “I’ll be right beside you, all the way. Promise.”

She sniffled and nuzzled closer to him, her nose barely reaching his collarbone. She was so small and thin, he realized, and apparently still afraid. He held her tighter, his hand carefully entangling itself in her uncombed hair.

“Shh, Mari… I’m here and I won’t go…”

After another few moments she sighed again, her face still tightly pressed against him, making her voice muffled.

“Ho will everyone react?”, she asked, “How will they think of me? How-… How should I go to school like that? What if-”

“You have Tikki back.”, Adrien softly interrupted her, placing a kiss on her forehead as he pulled back a little, never breaking the embrace, “You have me. You have Alya and Nino and the whole class. You have your parents and your earrings. You have no reason to be afraid.”

She sighed, leaning her forehead against his chin, one of her hands sliding up to his neck. There, she created goosebumps running down Adrien’s spine as her thumb drew small circled right at his hairline.

“But still… How-… How will I go there, now that Ladybug’s back? How-… How will this all play out?”

He shook his head, his fingers in her hair gently beginning to brush out the slight knots.

“Ladybug was never gone, Mari. Besides, they don’t know anything yet. All that they noticed was the healing light, nobody knows for sure. So, you can still do an official comeback. You can still stand up for Marinette, now that you can talk to Paris as Ladybug again.”, he furrowed his eyebrows, his chest clenching at the thought, “Well… You already talked to Paris as Ladybug… We just should’ve listened more closely…”

She stretched up, standing on her tip toes to press a kiss to his jaw.

“Don’t you dare starting to feel guilty now, kitty.”, she mumbled and he felt a shiver accompanying the goosebumps on his back, “Don’t you dare.”

“Alright then don’t you dare thinking anyone will still blame you after this night.”

She leant back and eyed him with a skeptical expression. Then she stepped out of his arms, holding out a hand for him to take. The repaired and cleaned bracelet Alya had given her all these months ago hung from her wrist, a proof for what they had been through.

“Deal. You won’t feel guilty and I won’t feel like I’m not welcome as Marinette now that Ladybug is back in action.”

A sad smile played around his lips and all his gaze met was understanding. They wouldn’t be able to hold their promise, both knew that. At least not on the first few weeks. Maybe months. Eventually even years.

But it felt good to have someone caring like that. To have someone reminding them everything was better now as soon as these feelings would pool up again.

 

* * *

 

Marinette and Adrien left the bakery ten minutes before the lesson would start. Hand in hand they walked towards Alya and Nino who still waited on the school steps, playfully bantering to pass the time.

“I say Adrien used my method. Come on, sunny boy gotta have the Chat side in him when he’s untransformed.”

“Absolutely not, Alya.”, Nino laughed, “Adrien’s way too nice for dumping water over sleeping people. Just because your method has worked in the past doesn’t mean it has to work for Adrien.”

Alya smirked, bopping his nose.

“Trust me, it’s the only method that works on a sleeping Marinette.”, she retorted, looking very sure of herself.

“I say he kissed her.”

“Ew, Nino! Morning breath!”

He leaned in close, grinning smugly.

“Hasn’t stopped me from waking you with a kiss.”, he played with his eyebrows and she pushed him away, laughing.

“Yeah, but Adrien’s a sunshine boy. He’d never try to kiss her awake. Maybe flirt her awake, that I’d believe.”

Nino leant back again, wrapping his arms around her shoulders and lightly propping himself up on her.

“True, that’s the one and only. Seriously, in which situation doesn’t he flirt his way out?”

Alya brought her hands up to his elbows, smiling up to her boyfriend and nuzzling her nose on his. He closed his eyes and hummed lightly, giving her a brief kiss.

“Says you, you damn sweet talker. You’re just as bad as him, you know? I really think you two spent too much time together.”, she laughed, kissing him in response but never long enough for both of them, “You’re constantly trying to seduce me, Mister.”

“Hey, I learned from the best.”, Nino chuckled, one of his arms sliding down her arm so that his hand came to a halt on her waist, pulling her closer, “Besides, how could I deny the sweetest word for the sweetest girl around?”

Alya playfully groaned, rolling her eyes behind closed eyelids.

“You’re insufferable, Lahiffe, has anyone ever told you that?”

Nino laughed and shrugged, kissing her again.

“Just you and it still sounds like a compliment out of your mouth.”

“Well, that’s just what you hear.”

They were so caught up in their conversation that they almost didn’t notice how Adrien cleared his throat, causing them to turn their gazes towards their friends.

“… Guys, really? Here? Out on the open?”

Nino shrugged, pulling Alya closer to him and pressing a mocking, brief kiss to her temple.

“Yeah? Problem with that?”

Adrien rolled his eyes and squeezed Mari’s hand, then let go of her to let her hug Alya and Nino. He chuckled as his best friend shot him a wink before turning to go to class with the others, going up the stairs to the schoolyard.

 

* * *

 

In class, the others stayed silent about the events of last night. Everyone had felt the healing light, everyone had had injuries from the Miss Fortune attack or later attacks that had healed.

Everyone had felt that Ladybug was back.

Marinette smiled as she sat down beside Alya again, for the first time in months without asking if it was really okay. Her best friend lightly touched her shoulder, smiling at her when the girl turned to look at her. They shared a cheeky grin, then turned to the front again.

The others were too ashamed and afraid to speak up, Marinette knew that. Now that Ladybug was back, or even just her powers, she stood in a completely different light. All the time in which they had so horribly disrespected her, bullied her, ignored her, all that time had been a lie.

They had realized that, or were just in the process of realizing, and Marinette knew they needed their time. So she waited. Waited for a move by them, to come to her.

She had asked her friends to keep their mouths shut about it. They had needed their own time dealing with the fact that Marinette was innocent, even before knowing she was Ladybug. They had all needed time adjusting, dealing with their own feelings, even before the lie had been proven wrong to them.

So, Marinette gave her classmates the same time. They needed it and she wouldn’t push them.

Finally, in the last break before school would be over, she felt someone crashing into her. Small but very strong arms engulfed her waist and stomach and someone pressed their face against her back, between her shoulder blades, just as she had been about to leave the classroom behind her friends. She had originally wanted to get a bit of fresh air for a few minutes but she immediately knew that wouldn’t be possible anymore.

Adrien already turned around, ready to fight everyone coming close Marinette but as he realized it was a hug he relaxed again.

Marinette looked down, seeing a very familiar, skin tight sweater on the arms tightly holding her back. As she glanced back she recognized the bright pink hair and the cap that laid forgotten on the floor.

Alix sniffled into her grey jacket and Marinette gently smiled, placing her arms above Alix’ to grant some kind of comfort for the smaller girl. She knew Alix was a little extreme about her feelings and also very ashamed she hadn’t seen it sooner. She needed to hide her face, she’d always had problems admitting she was wrong. But when she felt the need to apologize, she was the first to do so most of the times.

The class remained silent for a moment, then Marinette felt someone rushing past her and spinning around to tightly hug her from the front. Her face was pushed into a red sweater and the familiar scent of something mossy and a little sweaty as well as men’s deodorant filled her nose. Kim tightly locked his arms around her and the smaller girl on her back, firmly holding his childhood friend upright as he felt her knees getting shaky and her eyes filling with tears.

It just needed a short moment to have Ivan and Mylène following from one side, Rose, Nathaniel and Max embracing her from the other.

The first sob sounded from her as Juleka joined the hug behind Alix, leaning over her to bury her nose in Marinette’s hair, something wet falling onto her midnight blue strands.

Even Sabrina managed to get her hand on Marinette’s shoulder between Alix and Mylène, completing the pile by snuggling close.

It didn’t take long for all of them to start crying, out of guilt, shame and relief. It didn’t even take a second for them to tighten the hug around Marinette, sobs now sounding from them.

Alya leant against Nino, sniffling slightly as they watched their classmates going down to their knees, arranging themselves so that they could remain in this position, with Marinette in their middle. Alix still hugged her tightly from behind, Kim held them both from the front. Ivan had spread his arms to hug Mylène, Alix and Sabrina closer, Nathaniel and Max had linked their arms to keep Juleka and Rose in this position.

Now that the view was open, Alya spotted Chloé, still on her seat. It was obvious the blonde was trembling as she packed her stuff together, tears shining in her blue eyes. Adrien was about to walk around their classmates, probably to talk to her, but Chloé merely stood up, kept her gaze down and rushed past them all, down the stairs. Nino held both Alya and Adrien back as he caught Marinette’s gaze, telling him to let her go.

His girlfriend and best friend sighed as Chloé vanished from their view, out of the school building. Alya took a step back again, turning to their classmates, softly taking Nino’s hand, while Adrien still looked at the spot where his childhood friend was gone.

“Is she gonna be akumatized?”, Alya asked absentmindedly, her gaze wandering over to Adrien. The blonde shook his head, placing a hand on her shoulder while still standing with his back to their classroom.

“No. I-… I don’t think so. She’s upset about what she did, that’s no akumatizing material. Her anger and disappointment is going against herself, Hawkmoth has no use for that. He needs outgoing negativity, not ingoing. Plus… He doesn’t have a safe place to go to right now. He’ll know that if he’ll send out an Akuma now we’ll be faster on him than he can get himself to safety.”

Alya nodded.

“So that’s why you weren’t akumatized when you started blaming yourself on Marinette’s situation?”

He nodded, letting out a breath he didn’t know he had held.

“Yeah, that must’ve been the reason…”

He turned to their classroom again, their classmates not having moved one bit around Marinette, even if Miss Bustier was already coming back to start the last lesson for the day.

“So, what will we do about Chloé?”, Nino asked, his hand squeezing Alya’s as he watched Marinette’s burying her face on Kim’s sweater again, mumbling a bit. Probably to talk their classmates out of any guilt they might feel.

That was her, that was Marinette.

“We’ll give her time.”, Adrien felt his lips twitching, not quite knowing whether to smile or to cry, “She knows what she did and she’ll come around. I know her. This was way out of line and she knows that. She just needs to deal with herself before being able to deal with others again. She just needs time, as we all do.”


	54. Chapter 54 - Finale

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And the story continues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys so, so much.  
> I am honored I could upload this fanfiction here and meet you all, discuss theories and questions in the comments and make you all smile, be thrilled and, yes, also make you cry :D  
> It's really been so cool to work with you all and upload this huge project.  
> I don't know if you've noticed but this fanfiction means a lot to me. I've smiled and cried along with all of you and I've put quite a big part of myself into this project. I've written Marinette how I've experienced my depression so it really meant a lot to me to write, publish and get feedback from you guys.  
> So yeah, just so you know ;)  
> With that being said, thank you guys so much for reading and for one last time:  
> Enjoy~

Their hands swung between them as they headed home, Alya humming happily.

“You good, beautiful?”, Nino asked, a smile on his lips as she turned to him, grinning widely.

“Yeah! I kinda have a surprise for Marinette so I’m in a good mood.”

He chuckled, squeezing her hand as he led her over a street since she was too caught up in daydreaming.

“A surprise? What kinda surprise?”

She just giggled, shaking her head.

“You’ll have to see.”, she smugly replied, giggling a little as they entered the house in which her family lived, walking up the stairs to her front door. Nino decided to let her have her fun, instead gesturing for her key to unlock the front door.

In his understanding Alya had promised to him they’d be alone but apparently her mother had gotten a free shift. She came towards them with a smile as they kicked off their shoes.

“Hi Nino! Hi Alya! How was school?”, Marlena asked with a gentle smile, briefly hugging Nino before hugging her daughter as well, giving her a kiss on the forehead.

“Good! It was really good now that’s Ladybug’s back. Everyone’s so much better now.”

Marlena held her daughter close and swayed from side to side a little, then unwillingly let her go.

“I’m glad. Anyway, Papa is still at work and I’ve just brought the girls to their music lessons. Could you get them in about an hour again? I’ll be a little busy so I can’t pick them up.”

Alya nodded, then Marlena turned to Nino again, furrowing her eyebrows.

“Are you okay, Nino? You look a little pale.”

Just from the corner of his eyes he saw Alya recoiling, then staring at him with wide eyes. Her gaze immediately flickered down to his chest and he was fast to respond, know what she must think.

“I’m feeling absolutely fine, Madame Césaire, nothing to worry abo-aaah!”

Alya had grabbed his arm and pulled him towards her room, throwing a quick comment over her shoulder to explain to her mother.

“We’ll be in my room, homework! See ya, Maman!”

“Okay…?”, Nino barely heard from Marlena as Alya already closed the door, pushing him into the room. He was about to say something but Alya cut him off, grabbing his shirt and pulling it up. Her gentle hand trembled as she ran her fingertips over the faint scar that he wore as a reminder of what had happened, a little sniffle escaping her.

“Alya?”

Her fingers stilled on his bare chest and he sighed, slowly, carefully wrapping his arms around her. Her face was blocked because she held his shirt up so he stretched up his chin to hook it on the seam and push the fabric down, finally seeing her again. She was breathing quickly and flatly, her eyes fixed on his chest where Hawkmoth’s sword had stabbed him.

“Alya…”, he tried another time but she didn’t react. Her body trembled and recoiled another time. Now Nino finally understood that she was probably reliving this moment.

“Hey, Alya, snap out of it. I’m fine, I’m okay.”

After a few moments Alya shook her head, lowering his shirt down again but keeping her cold hand on his warm skin beneath the fabric, then she dropped into his embrace. He rested his chin on her head and hummed, placing one of his hands above the fabric on hers, still keeping her close with the other arm.

“It’s okay, promise. It’s okay. I’m okay.”

She sniffled another time, her fingers beneath his, beneath the fabric slowly moving on his skin.

“… Sorry…”, the word came with a slight choke, barely being pressed out beside the forced will not to cry. Nino shook his head, his hand above hers curling in to take a hold of her thumb through the shirt.

“It’s okay, Alya… Really. It’s fine.”, he repeated all over again, finally feeling her lifting her free arm to wrap it around his waist. He placed a gentle kiss on her hair, burying his nose there, “I’m here, we’re together. We’re together, Alya.”

She responded with a hesitant nod, then finally he pulled out her warming hand from beneath his shirt and glanced down to control the cuts on her arm, the ones she got from cataclysm. They had noticed how they had begun closing themselves to leave nothing but tiny, faint scars after the magical reaction of Adrien’s cataclysm had shaken the building and apparently sucked out all the remaining magic in Alya’s body. Of course, what didn’t stop destruction only made it stronger.

The magic inside her body had probably been attracted to the new cataclysm like a magnet.

He breathed through when he saw that the cuts had gone back to barely cover her hand. The ones on her forearm and wrist had completely healed.

Nino took her hand, and interlaced their fingers, resting the back of her hand against his chest, against his beating heart again.

He knew she needed that.

“It’s okay, Alya. We’re together and we’re okay.”

She sniffled once again, pressing her face into his shirt. He smiled, holding her tighter.

“You said you have a surprise for Mari?”

 

* * *

 

Marinette’s phone beeped.

She looked at it, suddenly beaming and leaning against Adrien who had come over to her place after school.

It was a notification of the Ladyblog. She pressed on it and read the text under a photo of Ladybug that Alya must’ve taken right as she’d left after she’d dropped her off at her home.

 

**Peeps, Ladybug’s not dead! I’ve seen her yesterday evening, jumping over the rooftops! Our hero is back in business! Anyway, I’ll keep you updated on what held her down so long, so stay tuned on the Ladyblog! Love ya!**

**  
**

“Hey Adrien, look at this!”, she exclaimed happily, nudging his shoulder with hers. He looked at her phone and wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

“Did you know she made a photo when you left?”, he asked, slightly kissing her cheek.

“No! She surprised me with this. Hold on.”

 

 **Marinette:** Aaaaaaahhhhh!! Alya, thank you so much!

 

 **Alya:** I got your back, gurl!

 

 **Marinette:** Thank you so, so much, I love you Alya!  <3

 

 **Alya:** Mutual feelings here  <3

 

The bluenette grinned, turned her phone off and laid back on Adrien’s shoulder.

“Finally, everything’s going back to normal again…”, she sighed, relieved. He rested his head on her hair and smiled.

“You’ve earned it.”, he mumbled, carefully brushing over her lower arm where her scars had been. She smiled as well and looked down at the thin, almost not visible white line that went down her arm up to her wrist, interrupted by the bracelet, now repaired and whole, with its colors shining again. Adrien brushed over the scar with his thumb, caressing it gently. She closed her eyes and inhaled his scent as he slowly reached her wrist and intertwined their fingers.

“Princess…?”, he silently asked, snaking a hand around her to rest it on her stomach. He buried his face in her let down hair and she could feel his breathing on her ear, “You know… I’m sorry…”

“For what?”, she whispered, enjoying the warmth that radiated from his body beneath her through her back. He laid back and she adjusted herself above him on the chaise where they were snuggled up, “For this?”

His head was beside hers and he still looked at her arm, tracing down the line with his fingers again. She kissed his cheek and closed her eyes. Adrien softly bent her arm and placed her fingers on his lips, resting them there. After a few moments, he replied, letting her feel the breeze of air against her skin.

“For not being there for you. I could’ve prevented-… this…”

She felt his thumb against her scar again, nuzzling against his face with her nose.

“It’s not your fault. And soon, the scar will fade. Then, nothing will remain of this time but memories and the knowledge that we’ve overcome this. Promise.”

“But what’s with the scars inside? I hurt you… I believed you killed Ladybug – which you obviously didn’t – but I was blended with my mourning and pain. I was-…”

“You don’t have to justify your actions. You didn’t know any better.”

He shook his head, biting on his lip. She felt his erratic breathing and feared he would burst out in tears.

“Adrien?”

“No, I-… Mari, I could’ve-… I should’ve, actually-… I-…”

She sat up a little, looking him into the face.

“Adrien, shh. It’s alright. It’s over and we’re both just fine, aren’t we? I have a new life now, a better one than ever before. I have you and I finally know that you’re my Chat, my partner in fighting Hawkmoth. We actually had a chance in defeating him and I bet we’ll have another one sometime in the future. Don’t worry. We’ll stand through this… Together. Won’t we?”

His eyes shimmered with tears but he smiled and brushed over her cheek.

“We will, if you want to. But still, I’m-… I can’t forgive myself for hurting you. I even continued to kick you when you already defeated the Akuma for me and begged me to free you. I-… I felt like I could kill you, my lady! And I don’t know-…”

“It’s okay, Adrien. It won’t happen again and if you can’t forgive yourself, then let me do it for you…”, she laid back, closed her eyes and lifted her hand from his lips to his hair, scratching him behind the ears. Instantly, a deep rumble arose in his body, somewhere in his chest. She stopped and smirked.

“By the way, you can really purr, kitty?”

He was still in conflict with himself about what he had done to her, but he managed a little smile.

“Yeah. I discovered it a few months ago, when I sat in a massaging chair.”

“That’s so cool!”, her eyes went wide excitedly. She buried her hand in his soft hair again and continued to scratch him, his purring vibrating in his chest. She smiled, finding it soothing and calming, so she allowed herself to doze a little.

The sun slowly moved up her leg but as it stayed on her wound too long, she moved a bit out of the light, scrunching up her face. Adrien’s hand moved down her body and lightly brushed over the bandage that was under her pants.

“Does it still hurt?”

She nodded but continued to scratch his head. His hand moved away from her wound and decided to rest on her stomach again.

“You know, I wondered… Why did we stay hurt? Nino was in danger to life but his wound healed like it was nothing.”

“Is the kitten jealous?”, she laughed, “Maybe it was because he needed all the magic?”

“I’m not jealous! I’m just-… Curious. Why did it heal your cuts but didn’t let the wound on your leg vanish? And why are my wounds still there too? Was it something with his sword?”

She shrugged, making an undefined sound. She then proceeded to share her theory with him after a few moments.

“You know, I actually thought about this one. About the wounds, that is. I think it’s because we aren’t civilians.”

“But your cuts healed.”

“Because I hadn’t been a hero back then. I didn’t have my Miraculous, they were with Hawkmoth at that time. And it had been a consequence of my Akuma Miss Fortune, so I was able to reset it with my Lucky Charm.”

He nodded.

“But what’s it with our suits? They were ripped by his sword…”

Marinette thought for a moment, recalling her confusion back then.

“Alya asked me if I knew anything about our suits being powerless against something that Hawkmoth could’ve put on his sword…”

They remained silent for a moment until Adrien tensed up.

“Hey, what if it _is_ his sword?”

“What do you mean by that?”

His fingers moved on her stomach and she had to bite her lip to not make a sound. Instead, she put her other hand on top of his, intertwining their fingers.

“Well, I’m saying, what if actual weapons can harm our suits?”

“I thought about that too. But your baton is a real weapon as well. So why didn’t it do any harm on Hawkmoth?”

The blonde groaned at that and ran a thumb over the back of her hand on her stomach.

“Hey Tikki?”, Marinette called out. She didn’t want to interrupt the two Kwami but she had to know. Her little red Kwami flew over from the desk and floated in front of her face, a sleepy Plagg following her. He landed on Marinette’s stomach right above their hands and curled up into a ball.

“Yes, Marinette?”

“How comes Hawkmoth could hurt us?”

Tikki looked down to Plagg sheepishly but he just snored away. So she huffed and shook her head, going on to explain it on her own.

“See, you’re a Ladybug. And Adrien’s a cat. You two have natural enemies and Hawkmoth apparently knew.”

“What are our natural enemies?”, Adrien wondered.

“Well, for you it’s mostly dogs. So everything that has to do with dogs, their teeth and claws and so on. And for you Marinette, it’s insect needles, to pin down dead insects, y’know? Bug collectors do that. I guess, Hawkmoth figured and made a very big needle, if you can call it that.”, she shivered but continued, “Oh, and also jam jars and spiders.”

The bluenette nodded, thoughtful. She felt her boyfriend turning his head, instantly looking out for spiders in her room and couldn’t suppress a little smirk.

“Alright, but-… Why did this insect needle hurt Adrien when his suit’s weaknesses are dog teeth and claws?”

“You two are yin and yang.”, Plagg yawned. But he didn’t explain any further so Tikki continued.

“He means to say that you’re taking over the other’s weaknesses, but also the other’s strengths. You, Marinette, have cat like reflexes, while Adrien has the ability to move very quickly, like you two do when you’re using your weapons to move.”

“So, it hurt me more than him because it’s primarily _my_ weakness?”

“Exactly. Dog claws and teeth will hurt Chat Noir more than they usually would, as will insect needles do to you. Oh, and please do not get bitten by a spider. It could be pretty-… Painful.”

They nodded, trying to process this information. Then, a thought came to Marinette.

“I have my Lucky Charm and Adrien has Cataclysm. Do we transfer that, too?”

“We don’t talk about that. Now let me nap.”, Plagg harshly interrupted, a somehow concerned undertone to his voice. Tikki rapidly nodded, flying down to Plagg and nuzzled against him.

“I’m really tired too.”

They shrugged, deciding they would have enough time to discuss this sometime else. Instead, another question still burned in Marinette’s mind.

“Adrien, on that-… Day, I tried-… Uh…”, he kissed her behind her ear and she relaxed again, “You probably heard Chloé saying there have been death’s because of Akuma attacks while I hadn’t been able to transform. Is that-… Is that true? I mean… I heard it in the news and-… But you-…”

He remained silent for a moment and she deflated.

“… A few, yes.”, he finally admitted, unwillingly.

“Oh god… I-… I’m responsible for that…”

Instantly, Adrien tensed and his fingers held hers tighter, assuring her.

“Mari, I’m so sorry, really. But none of this was your responsibility. And besides, you saved a fair share of people who were hurt or injured or even fell into a coma during the attacks. Because, I actually had my thoughts on that one. Your Lucky Charm was stronger than usual, wasn’t it?”

She nodded, now curiosity flashing through her thoughts.

“Well, as was my Cataclysm. I figured-… We’re yin and yang, as Plagg said. I’m destruction and you’re creation. So, I guessed if I used my superpower without your Miraculous even activated, the balance would have been disturbed. Maybe that’s the reason why they were stronger?”

She thought about that for a while, scrunching together her eyebrows.

“I-… Guess-…?”

“I actually talked about it with Plagg while your Miraculous was not activated.”

She laughed, placing a little kiss on his collarbone that was bared because his shirt had slid down a bit.

“And Plagg told you? Or did you figure it out on your own, big kitty?”

He joined in laughing and she felt his chest jumping up and down.

“I actually figured it out on my own! You know Plagg.”

Marinette just smiled and looked at Adrien.

“Thank you, Adrien. Thank you for trying to keep everyone safe.”

Instead of answering, he kissed her gently.

She leant into the kiss and enjoyed his warmth, slightly grinning against his lips.

“Mmmh, we’re hungry, aren’t we?”, he mumbled and she just pulled him closer with her hand still in his hair. He let it happen without any objection and she had to grin even more, deepening their kiss.

Just as they felt completely safe, Marinette’s phone went off and she broke up the kiss with an annoyed eye roll. It was a message from Alya.

 

 **Alya:** Gurl, you and Loverboy have to move! Akuma attack at Rue de Babylone to Rue de Sèvres! Some TV guy…

 

 **Marinette:** Thank you for the info. We’ll be there in five. Stay out of danger!

 

 **Alya:** Of course ;)

 

“What is it?”, Adrien asked pouting as she got up and the Kwami’s started floating next to them. She pulled him to his feet and placed a little kiss on his cheek.

“Akuma, Rue de Babylone to Rue de Sèvres. Alya just wrote me. It’s some TV guy, apparently.”

“Wait, Akuma? Hawkmoth’s still active? And he actually takes the risk of sending out Akumas again?”

“We just had a brief interaction with him. Of course, he’s seeking revenge and as long as he still has his Miraculous, he won’t stop. Plus, maybe he already found a new place to stay safe in?”

He nodded, grinning. She pulled her shoulder long hair back into her signature pigtails and smirked.

“Well then…”, he shrugged, rolling his shoulders.

“Go get him tiger – if I’m slower than you, against all odds, that is.”

_“Plagg, Claws out!”_

_“Tikki, Spots on!”_

They smiled at each other and settled for one last kiss before they went off to go back to defeating Akumas, just like they did before. Wind blew into their faces while they ran to save Paris, but they wouldn’t let themselves be slowed down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Before you all flood me with questions if there'll be a sequel:
> 
>  
> 
> Yeah, there will be a sequel ;)

**Author's Note:**

> You can check out my fanfiction.net and tumblr account under 3laxx, too!

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [No More Fear - A Breeze Oneshot](https://archiveofourown.org/works/12310566) by [synovelle](https://archiveofourown.org/users/synovelle/pseuds/synovelle)
  * [Un Vent de Panique](https://archiveofourown.org/works/12726171) by [LadyMorganaShire](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyMorganaShire/pseuds/LadyMorganaShire)




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